A Choice in Chaos

By Moustafa Kadous

A Choice in Chaos is the inspirational story of Moustafa Kadous, who rose from abject poverty to becoming a global business owner and entrepreneur. As a young boy, he suffered bullying, heartache, and the uncertainty of a future beyond. Realizing

• Language: English
• Publisher: Moustafa Kadous
• Release date: Aug 5, 2020
• ISBN: 9781735488318

Moustafa Kadous

Moustafa Kadous is a leading transformational entrepreneur, dynamic personal life and business coach and keynote speaker. Believing that learning is a lifetime pursuit, Moustafa has passionately pursued knowledge, wisdom, and skills throughout his life. From his time as an impoverished youth on the streets through his young adult skirmishes and successive business ventures that have shaped his destiny, Moustafa has gained global recognition as a business leader and architect of many successful companies. Across the past fifteen years, Moustafa created multiple enterprises from scratch, turning each into profitable multi-million-dollar revenue generators. His life's work is carried forward through his company, Skilled Now, a global conglomerate of businesses spread across the globe. His diverse portfolio includes technology solutions, business and soft skills training, business process outsourcing, career training and certification, and professional online coaching services. The common thread is his mission to enable individuals, businesses, and nations to maximize their possibilities and do so through leading-edge technology and practical business solutions. The goal is worldwide economic prosperity. He manages these businesses through offices in the United States, Portugal, Saudi Arabia, UAE, and Egypt. His entrepreneurial prowess emerged early as a college student creating various enterprises to finance his education. He honed his leadership skills working for global organizations that he led through complex strategic business negotiations, business process re-engineering, workplace culture transformation, and turn-around sales and profitability performance. In addition to this inspirational autobiography, A Choice in Chaos, Moustafa is the author of Might Insight, and Unlocking the Best You, books that offer promise and hope in these difficult times and the confidence to make your choice in chaos.

Book preview

A Choice in Chaos

A Choice in Chaos

A Choice in Chaos

Moustafa Kadous

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Contents

1 Open Wounds

2 An Angel in Hell

3 Love, an Urge to Change

4 A Hunger to Grow

5 Leaving Behind, Moving Ahead

6 Light at the End

7 Back to Square One

8 Wicked Ways

9 Stay on Guard

10 Trust Is Hard

11 On the Right Path

12 A New Life with a Stronger Bond

13 In Loving Memory

14 Afterward

Copyright

Copyright © 2020 – All Rights Reserved

This book is copyright protected and is intended for personal use only. No parts of this publication may be reproduced in any form or by any means, including printing, scanning, photocopying, or otherwise unless explicitly stated. Any attempts to amend, sell, distribute, paraphrase, or quote the contents of this book, without the consent of the author or copyright owner can and will result in legal action.

About the Author

Moustafa Kadous is a leading transformational entrepreneur , dynamic personal life and business coach and k eynote s peaker . Believing that learning is a lifetime pursuit, Moustafa has passionately pursued knowledge, wisdom, and skills throughout his life. From his time as an impoverished youth on the streets through his young adult skirmishes and successive business ventures that have shaped his destiny, Moustafa has gained global recognition as a business leader and architect of many successful companies.

Across the past fifteen years, Moustafa created multiple enterprises from scratch, turning each into profitable multi-million-dollar revenue generators. His life’s work is carried forward through his company, Skilled Now, a global conglomerate of businesses spread across the globe. His diverse portfolio includes technology solutions, business and soft skills training, business process outsourcing, career training and certification, and professional online coaching services. The common thread is his mission to enable individuals, businesses, and nations to maximize their possibilities and do so through leading-edge technology and practical business solutions . The goal is worldwide economic prosperity. He manages these businesses through offices in the United States, Portugal, Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates, and Egypt.

His entrepreneurial prowess emerged early as a college student creating various enterprises to finance his education. He honed his leadership skills working for global organizations that he led through complex strategic business negotiations, business process re-engineering, workplace culture transformation, and turn-around sales and profitability performance.

In addition to this inspirational autobiography, A Choice in Chaos , Moustafa is the author of Might Insight, and Unlocking the Best You , books that offer promise and hope in these difficult times and the confidence to make your choice in chaos.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to the most special people in my life who made my life beautiful and gave me the strength to continue pushing towards achieving my goals even in my darkest days. These people include my lovely mom and dad, my beautiful wife, my amazing children, and my awesome siblings.

To my lovely mom : I know you’re in heaven looking down at me with a broad smile on your face. I know you’re proud that your little boy has grown into a successful man. I miss you so much, and I wish I could bring you back. You were my best friend, my confidant, whose words gave me the strength to believe in myself even when things were tough. Your prayers were the winds beneath my wings, and they carried me from a place of nothingness to this place of comfort. May God bless your soul and grant you eternal rest.

To my kind father : You taught my siblings and me to be strong. To not depend on anybody, but on ourselves alone, and to work hard towards achieving our goals. Thank you for teaching me some of the virtues that helped me grow into the man I’ve become today.

To my beautiful wife : Thank you so much for believing in me, for trusting me, for always praying for me, and for walking with me on my loneliest paths. Meeting you has been the best thing that ever happened to me, and nothing gives me so much joy than waking up beside you every morning. Thank you for the encouragement and for giving me the most amazing kids ever. I love you, and I promise to spend the remaining days of my life making you the happiest woman on earth.

To my amazing kids : Mazen, Begad, Ramage, Yardan, and Selena. You’ve all made me a proud father. You’re the most amazing children any father could ever ask for. I have watched you all grow from infants to hardworking teenagers and young adults who remind me of my younger self. Giving you the kind of good life I never had has always been my biggest goal, and I must ensure I achieve it to the last.

To my awsome siblings : Tarek, Alaa, Adel, Salwa, and Abeer, thank you so much for making childhood fun and memorable. Thank you for upholding all the beautiful virtues that our parents taught us. I love you all.

Acknowledgement

I want to acknowledge my business partner, Mohamed Al Dhabaan , specifically. Mohammed is a renowned legal practitioner who has, over the years, been the foundational backbone to the success of our business. I’d like to thank you for believing in me and having my back all through the hurdles and challenges of growing the business empire we have grown together. You’ve always had faith in my abilities even when other people doubted me, and you’re always available to provide any support that I need to keep the business afloat. I want you to know that I am very grateful, and I wish you nothing but success and God’s blessings in your life and all your endeavors.

I also want to acknowledge my strategic marketing partner, Cinda Daly , for always contributing her expertise to ensure the success of every project we embarked on together.

A special appreciation to my source of inspiration, Malcolm Fry , for being my mentor and role-model in the service and support industry.

I am also eternally grateful to everyone on my worldwide team . You guys are the real definition of loyalty! You have proven to me that with you, nothing is impossible. You make teamwork and leadership so easy, and I feel blessed to have every one of you on board.

1

Open Wounds

As the saying goes, time heals all wounds.

They say that with time, all the pains and agony stuck deep inside your heart will begin to melt away. But then, the question is: Is time compelling enough to make all pains go away?

Life, they say, is a complex maze of different stages. With each stage comes a unique lesson of wisdom, pain, pleasure, or regret. However, there’s one stage that requires no test, no preparation, and no struggles. It is a time when you’re just supposed to live and enjoy the moments without any care in the world; that’s your childhood.

A child’s soul is like clay. You can mold it in any shape that pleases you. It is so fragile that even the smallest thing you do can break it or make it bask in a joyful euphoria. A child’s heart absorbs everything that happens around their environment, and in the end, these things determine the kind of person that the child becomes.

Although childhood indeed plays a huge role in the kind of person that one becomes when they grow up, we all have the choice to either remain in that unfortunate situation of our childhood or change the narrative. We can break whatever negative circle that surrounded our childhood and become a better version of ourselves. This precisely was what I did to get to the place where I am today.

My name is Moustafa Kadous . I was born in Gharbiah Governorate, an impoverished town on the outskirts of Egypt. I grew up with my five siblings-- three elder brothers, Tarek, Alaa, and Adel, and two sisters, Salwa and my twin sister Abeer.

We were all raised by our mother all alone, not because she was a single mother or widow, but because my father was mostly always unavailable. He was a traveler, traveling all around the world, working and living the good life, only to remember us once in a while like a benevolent stranger visiting the less privileged.

My siblings and I were always sad each time we saw other kids with their father. We ever wished our father wasn’t absent. We hoped he could come back home to live with us and make us have that awesome feeling of pride we saw in other kid’s eyes. But then, even when we wanted to be mad at him, Mom always told us that he loves us, and he too, always made up for the absence every time he came to visit us.

As Dad traveled around the world, he pitched his tent with many other women, while Mom struggled to raise us. He had a good job and lots of money, but due to his absence, we didn’t get to enjoy his wealth as we should. Because Dad had other wives, he had lots of bills to pay, many mouths to feed, and lots of people pinning for his attention. Hence, we couldn’t always get money from him all the time.

But then, Mom would always teach us to love our father. She always told us that he wasn’t taking us for granted. That she couldn’t travel to be with him for some reason, so he was all alone in these cities; maybe it was loneliness that drove him into the arms of other women.

As a child, I couldn’t hold a grudge. Each time he came to visit us, I felt like we were having a festival. As soon as we saw him, even from afar, my siblings and I would jump up in excitement, run into his arms, and cling unto him as if our lives depended on hugging him. He was a handsome, tall, and hunky man with an overwhelming presence that made him look like a superstar. His perfume smelt so richly divine, and in those fleeting moments, I was always proud to call him my father.

He never came empty-handed; he brought us clothes and gifts, which we would brag about to other kids in the coming days. But then, just like a migratory bird that only appears during a season, Dad would disappear again, and our suffering would continue until the next time he decided to remember us.

While growing up, I was a beautiful child. My skin was smooth like an egg. I had my straight, shiny, silky hair, so beautiful that it always made people think I was a girl. In Egypt, every child must undergo vaccination, leaving a permanent mark on the body. The girls were vaccinated in the leg, and the boys were vaccinated in the arm. I was supposed to be vaccinated on the arm, but because people always thought I was a girl, the nurse mistakenly vaccinated me on the leg, leaving three huge marks that are still visible today. Why? Well, because I was confused for a girl.

I was that adorable little boy that older girls would always gush about. My brothers knew this, so they always used me for getting girls closer to them. Each time they wanted to draw a girl’s attention, they would take me along with them because they knew that the girl’s heart would melt when she saw me and would love to come closer to play with me. That way, they would get a chance to talk to the girl.

One day, my brother Alaa took me out. As we stood by the roadside, he gave me a letter and bent down to whisper into my ears.

Moustafa, you see that lady? he gestured at a beautiful lady standing a few feet away from us. The one in black.

I nodded.

Go and give her this letter.

As a child, I was naïve; I thought that maybe the letter had fallen from her bag.

I walked up to her and gave her the letter. She was stunned. She smiled- just the same way all the ladies used to smile when they saw me. But, as soon as she opened the letter and read it, the smile on her face disappeared.

What? How dare you? she barked. Angrily, she tore the paper into shreds. Are you crazy? she continued, and before I could turn around to look at my brother, she gave me a big slap and walked away. Curious eyes looked at me, and everyone laughed hysterically. I was so embarrassed that I wished the ground could open up and swallow me.

Since our father was mostly away, our eldest brother, Tarek, was the head in-charge of the house. He was only a teenager, but he had to bear the responsibility of looking after us, keeping the home in order, and guiding us as a father should. Being a teenager with these enormous responsibilities often made him nervous and agitated, so much that he would shout to any of us and sometimes beat my sister or me for disobeying him.

I suffered the most beatings and punishments from him, partly because I was the naughtiest. I always did the things he warned me not to do, and always wanted to have things done my own way. Each time I did, he would beat me up, and then I would run to a corner to cry. Sometimes, when I cried, he would bring me toys, or take me out to cheer me up. Seeing that he was apologetic, next time, I would offend him again, and he would beat me again, this time maybe more fiercely than the last time.

At some point, Tarek became too violent that Mom could no longer control him. He had grown strong muscles, and he was always frustrated, so none of us could stand up to him. One day, he beat me up so badly that Mom feared that he would injure me, so she took my other siblings and me to our uncle’s house to stay until his anger calmed down.

Though I was the one beaten and hurt, I couldn’t stand the fact that my brother was home alone, and we were here about to have dinner. Looking at the dining table filled with delicious-smelling meals, I wondered if Tarek would have any food to eat that night. I wanted to ask Mom to go and bring him so we could eat together. But, I knew she wouldn’t agree. So, while my uncle’s wife dished out the food, I walked to the balcony and jumped down. Everyone screamed out in fear as they saw me jump. They feared that I would die or have a bad injury, but it was just the first floor, and the balcony wasn’t too high. I didn’t wait down there for a second. I took to my heels and ran back home.

I understood that it was Dad’s absence that made Tarek that way. I knew that deep inside him, he just wanted to be like his mates, to live a carefree life, to enjoy his teenage years without being forced to be a father to his siblings. This made me always wish our father could be more present with us.

Dad was a charmer. He knew exactly what women wanted; that’s why he always got them with a snap of his fingers. This often made me wonder about my mother. Why didn’t he spend on her the way he spent on other women? But now, all the puzzles are in place. Now I know that he took her needs for granted because she wasn’t the type that would ask for luxuries. She was content with what she had, and the only thing she ever wanted to be was for her children to be taken care of.

There was a time my father came to visit us. He came with a beautiful Portuguese lady. He told us that she was his boss’ wife. But we later got to know that she was one of his many wives. Mom was hurt when someone told her this. I could see the pain in her eyes, but she still couldn’t hate him. She loved him regardless and hoped that someday he would turn a new leaf.

Father was rich, but we only tasted his wealth whenever he came to visit us. Most times, we lived in abject poverty. People wouldn’t come to visit us because we had nothing to offer, but each time that father came around, visitors would start swarming to our home. We knew that they all came to have a taste of the gifts, expensive car, and exquisite cuisines that father brought with him, but this didn’t bother us. We were as thrilled as they were! We knew that those things were fleeting and that the party would end as soon as my father returned to wherever he came from.

We, a family of seven, barely had meat. Fish was a luxury. If managed properly, we sometimes had meat monthly or even two times a month. I remember the excitement on all our faces when my mother was about to serve us chicken. We would wait anxiously, repetitively asking if it’s ready yet. It was always a celebration. However, our main meal used to be white cheese topped with tomato and cucumbers, with any vegetables to suit the taste. Our grandfather sometimes used to bring us watermelon and fruits of the season, which lightened up our day.

Our mother taught us to celebrate every occasion, regardless of what religion it represented. We had neighbors with different religions and faiths, and we got along quite well with all. Therefore, Christmas, Eid festivals, and Holi had equal significance to us.

During Eid Al-Adha (Festival of Sacrifice), when Muslims sacrifice a sheep, we couldn’t afford to buy one, so Mom would take us to our relatives to watch them slaughter their sheep and celebrate with them. Though we always wished we could afford to do these festivities in our home, we were comforted with the fact that during this festival, we received lots of gifts and money from people. It was an opportunity to see those relatives we hadn’t seen in a long time.

There were so many things I wished my mother could afford to get us, things that other children had. There was a time I was crazy about beige chamois trousers. One time, I saw a child in our neighborhood wearing it. It looked so good on him that I used to pray for God to give me one someday. That same period, before the Eid, my mother told us to visit the neighbors and wish them happy Eid. As my twin sister, Abeer, and I walked into the home of one of the neighbors, the woman welcomed us heartily, and