"If it wasn't in you,You would not see it in me"

By Betty R. Clawson

“If it wasn’t in you, You would not see it in me” is a journey of evaluating true self and raising your level of consciousness. Betty R. Clawson handled these and other traumatic experiences as she built a Multi-Million Dollar business. This book reflects­­ of the events that laid the fou

• Language: English
• Publisher: BRCLAWSON LLC
• Release date: Aug 18, 2018
• ISBN: 9781734776508

Betty R. Clawson

The definition of a Mother is to establish, to direct, to protect, and to support her young. Can you imagine a mother with over 6,000 children in 25 years? Wow! That's what the current and former students of Dudley Beauty College-Chicago call Betty Robinson Clawson--their mother in business. Dudley Beauty College-Chicago located on the south side of Chicago for 25 years has been an icon in the beauty industry for outstanding education. The mission of the school is to develop professional Cosmetologists, Nail Technicians, Estheticians, Instructor Trainees and Licensed professionals for the 21st Century. Mrs. Clawson came to Chicago quite reluctantly at the suggestion of her bosses, Joe and Eunice Dudley. Betty, a country girl from rural North Carolina, doubted her own ability of building a business in a big city. But of course, after working with and following the guidance of the Dudleys, she knew that they would not direct her wrong. So, in September of 1993, Dudley Beauty College - Chicago was born. Mrs. Clawson's community service duties have included Board of Directors for the 95th Business Association, and the Board of Directors for Illinois Association of Cosmetology Schools. During Gov. Jim Edgar's administration in 1998, she was appointed to the African American Family Commission and remained a member until January 2003. Recently she was appointed to the Board of Directors of God's House of All Nations Church as a community member. Betty's experience for the past 47+ years with Dudley Products includes: direct sales, professional route sales, territorial management, and the founding Dean of Dudley Cosmetology University in Kernersville, North Carolina. She attributes these experiences as preparation for leadership as a School Director. But her relationship with God prepared her for this new responsibility of changing the lives of future business leaders in the field of cosmetology. Over the past 25 years, Mrs. Clawson has been more than just a School Director. Ms. Clawson takes a personal interest in each student. She establishes contacts and foundations for each student that needs special direction. Any day of the week from Monday through Sunday, you will find Betty helping students with their personal problems, as well as, providing them with information to help them reach their goals. Even though Betty has a busy schedule, she takes the time out to motivate the entire student body every Wednesday morning from 8:30 a.m. to 9:00 a.m. Excellent customer service is a priority for her as she shares with students. "Exceptional customer service will separate the successful from the unsuccessful in business," says Betty Clawson, enthusiastically. Her favorite phrase is "when you touch a client, you transfer what you feel to that client." It is important for students to understand that they must cleanse themselves of negations and bitter thoughts so as not to transfer those feelings. If a client comes to them with negations and bitter thoughts, they should have enough love and joy so they can transfer those feelings to the client, thus changing the client's focus. Every client that leaves your chair should be able to feel your joy--never your disappointments. In 2006, Ms. Clawson was the Illinois nominee for Ernst & Young Entrepreneur of the Year. She also received the Lifetime Achievement Award from the Golden Scissors Foundation in Washington, D.C. In 2010 she was named one of Chicago Defender's Women of Excellence. Recently she was appointed to the Board of Directors of God's House of All Nations Church in Chicago.

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Introduction

Wake-Up Experience

The one thing that connects all of us from birth, life to death, is our experiences, whether good, bad, or ugly. We draw from every defeat, stagnation and triumph to become who we are. The difference between successful people and those who are stuck on the hamster wheel of life is how they navigate those experiences.

One Tuesday morning in 1998, an encounter on the south side of Chicago was so powerful that it only took fifteen seconds to influence my perspective on life. Two Dudley Beauty College educators, Sharron Gilty and Sharon Peoples, had enrolled me in a Basic Truth Principles class at Christ Universal Temple (C.U.T). The instruction shared with us by two of the seasoned ministers of the church, Reverend Harrell and Reverend Boyd, was masterfully expressed and exceptionally eye-opening. Both influenced my new understanding. To say that I was intrigued by the origin and principles of the teaching would be an understatement. To understand the history of how a school teacher started the New Thought Mega Church in 1956 is exhilarating. The multi-acre complex at 119th and Ashland housed two institutions of learning and a large banquet and meeting facility. It was motivating for me to see the possibilities. Before the class began, we were entering through the side entrance of the building and right at that moment, a tall, statuesque woman was leaving. Sharron whispered to me, That is Reverend Johnnie Coleman.

The woman, Doctor Reverend Johnnie Coleman, with a savvy business sense that rivaled those of Fortune 500 CEO’s, had introduced so many to what is called New Thought or embracing Christ Consciousness. Here, I’m meeting the Senior Pastor of C.U.T. and founder of the Universal Foundation for Better Living, a belief that the teachings of Christ and Christ Principles enriches one to live a healthy, happy and prosperous life. Admittedly, being a little star struck, I had to conquer my fear to talk to a living legend. Approaching her, I mustered up enough confidence to say, You are so beautiful!

My statement was a description of what I saw, felt, and admired in her accomplishments and had nothing to do with the fact that her complexion mirrored my own. Part of her achievements were represented by the fact that I was entering a magnificent glass and brick edifice created from her dreams and imagination. Christ Universal Temple—with a membership of over eleven thousand--was one of the first mega-churches in Chicago.

Dr. Rev. Johnnie Coleman’s response to my statement caused me to evaluate the mental pictures I had of everyone and every situation from that day forward. She stepped forward, looked me directly in the eyes and said, If it wasn’t in you, you would not see it in me.

Wow! was that a profound lesson! For a moment I thought, Oh, she’s saying I’m beautiful. Then suddenly, the spiritual understanding of that statement brought clarity: Whatever you see in others, would not be recognizable if it wasn’t already inside you.

Take a moment to think about that. If it wasn’t in you, you wouldn’t see it in me. Say it aloud. More than once. If it wasn’t in you, you wouldn’t see it in me. When was the last time you saw or said something constructive or destructive about a coworker, spouse, family, or friends? Go ahead, be honest. I’m sure you had the same reaction that I did. Wow, right? Because some of those things that went through your mind might not have been the most pleasant of thoughts.

The class was done and the encounter long past, but I pondered on her wisdom for a while. I thought about how I feel when I say someone is so lazy or that they’re so crazy; maybe even that the person’s just not right, etc. Well, how would I know what lazy, crazy, or just not right is like if there wasn’t some point of reference within myself? From then on, I began to watch my thoughts, actions, as well as my reactions in ways I had never done in the past. That Tuesday morning so long ago was a wake-up experience. I now realize that my observations in situations, and opinions of others, are more positive due to the paradigm shift which stemmed from a chance meeting in a parking lot of the New Thought capital in Chicago, Illinois.

Everyone gains knowledge, understanding, and perspective by life experiences, lessons brought on by family, friends, and the environment; all of which shape the textures of who you are and how you navigate through life. So, join me in exploring the different phases of my life as I share insight into the mindset of my experiences, and evaluate my perspective using the whole dynamic If it wasn’t in you, you wouldn’t see it in me as a measuring tool.

Reading with a purpose

Years ago, one of my mentors, Dr. Joe L. Dudley Sr., taught me about reading with a purpose. He said, reading with a goal of being in search of answers or direction, opens the subconscious mind to discovering your desires. The first thing we were told to do is write down our aim. What are you seeking? What solutions do you need for your business, personal and professional life? With today’s technology, writing down your purpose could be by using a phone, computer, or just old school pad and pencil. Write the vision and make it plain …

Now that you’ve identified the purpose or aim, the next part of the process is to gauge what you want to gain by reading this book. While the eyes glide across the words, it’s important to take time to connect with your personal experiences, using your past as a memory bank of knowledge to help determine what to apply to help your future. Thoughts or visions will come, and I encourage you to take the time to write them down. When an idea or solution reveals itself, document it immediately. Too much happens in our daily lives to trust important things to memory. Even if challenging emotions from reliving those experiences surface, write it down. Be aware of how you feel and are affected. Change comes by recognizing where you are, what you’ve been through and deciding where you want to go.

So, reader, or dare I say partner, as we go through this journey, I will share some jewels that have come from my fears, disappointments and successes. I hope they will enrich your life. The first, let’s just call them BRC Wisms. The name of these quotes came about one morning when sitting around having a session with my students. I shared a few life nuggets and, afterward, one of my students came to me and said thanks for sharing your BRC Wisms.

BRC’s Wisms are a combination of knowledge and a bunch of wisdom with a touch of ism. They were recognized during every experience which brought about a better understanding of myself. As you find your own Wisms write them down.

The second, is texture guides that can be found at the end of every chapter. These areas share major lessons throughout life that create the fabric of who we become. As you read, take some time to recognize the threads of love, hate and influence that make up your life. Let’s not forget if it wasn’t in you, you would not see it in me.

Let’s get to work!

Enjoy and Grow!

Chapter One

Texture

The Oak Tree Only Produces Acorns, Not Apples

BRC Wism

Our foundation, texture, and conditioning helps to engineer the patterns of our life. This texture is the feel, appearance, and characteristics of our personality. Texture encompasses forming the size, shape, and density of our beliefs. It is the arrangement of all the elementary parts that develop us into a whole person. How a person’s texture comes into existence, develops their viewpoint as well as their attitudes. Our views tell us how we interpret the world. The woven texture we experience as children often can be recognized in our personalities, our character, and sometimes our temperament. Unless we work towards altering inherited traits and behaviors or how we are hardwired, we may find ourselves continuously reliving the same experiences. While exploring my life’s journey as a daughter, sister, friend, mother, spouse, business leader, and transformational mentor, this truth became evident to me. Throughout my life, the foundational textures woven many years ago influenced many of my life decisions.

Finding the good in every situation

Growing up in Mineral Springs, North Carolina, in a big family of six brothers and two sisters proved to be one of the best things that could have happened to a dreamer like me. We didn’t know we were poor because we always had food even if it was only fried fatback meat with sprinkled sugar in the leftover grease to create a homemade syrup. Country style, which we then sopped up with piping hot biscuits. There were many times we had to agree to share the last one because our mother had gotten up at early dawn to make seventy-two homemade biscuits from scratch. Then mother would do it again for the next meal which meant there were 144 of those yummy delicacies prepared every day. There were never any leftovers. I remember waking up to the aroma of mother’s baked biscuits brushed with freshly churned butter, and the smell of fatback meat frying on the stove. I would jump out of the bed I shared with my two sisters, and rush to get myself, and my younger siblings, dressed before mother called us to the kitchen for breakfast.

Even though there were eleven mouths to feed, we learned to share and believed that everything was just as it was supposed to be. The secret to our happiness was we all had to eat together. Some might not understand why we couldn’t recognize that poverty was seemingly present in our lives. We were taught to be grateful for what we were privileged to have. Prayer before every meal was mandatory, even when it was a simple one of biscuits and gravy. Dad’s standard grace was, Thank You God for providing for our every need, bless this meal, may it serve as strength for our body, our mind, and our souls.

Healthy-VS-Unhealthy Perspective

My parents were examples of being somewhat content with our stomachs being full, a roof over our heads, lots of love, and plenty of fun. Mother came from a family of ministers. Her father and four of her uncles were preachers. In our community, they were all considered leaders and had congregations which depended on them for direction. As community leaders, mother’s family, the Thompsons, had the opportunity to travel to many churches and homes in places like Waxhaw, Monroe, Mint Hill, Charlotte, Hamlet and other areas of North Carolina. We were exposed to families from various income levels. Through this exposure, mother developed a desire for a variety of nice things. Keeping what she called wish books around for inspiration was one of her pastimes. Spiegel, Alden’s, and Sears catalogs were some of her favorites--ordering items from them when times were not so lean. To be informed on what was happening in other parts of the Unites States she subscribed to Ebony and kept them protected on the coffee table in the living room.

On the other hand, Dad, along with his brother and sister, grew up in the household of their aunt and uncle, Lula and Jimmy Robinson. Grandma Lula and Grandpa Jimmy, as we were instructed to call them, were farmers and lived a simple life growing their food and living off the land. Entertainment was mostly sitting on the front porch watching the cars pass by, telling stories, and laughing with family. Pure country living before living off the grid became popular. Operating independently of many public utility services was the way they lived. My paternal grandmother was so set in her ways that she didn’t want a bathroom in her house. She was content with the wooden outhouse that was several yards away from the house. Dad’s texture developed from that environment. Coming from two very different backgrounds, I often