Screw It!

By Carlos Jones

Pastor Carlos Jones II takes you on a life-altering journey as you learn to battle common marital and relationship struggles. In "Screw it!" Pastor Carlos shares his purpose, passion, and unique perspective of the world. He establishes a baseline for how to operate effectively and efficiently in relationships showing you how to build healthy, long-lasting friendships and marriages. 

Pastor Carlos fearlessly tackles the issues that erode relationships including pornography, infidelity, poor communication, and dishonesty and shows you how to apply the scripture to support the journey toward healing within yourself. You'll learn how to identify and understand your own purpose, how to function as a complete and healthy individual during singleness, and how to enter marriage whole and complete so that your marriage grows in an environment best suited for success. Pastor Carlos offers 16 characteristics men and women should look for when identifying friends and partners in God. He makes it easy to recognize individuals who should be sought for relationships. And he makes it easy to detect people whose presence in your life may be destructive.

"Screw it!" concludes with Pastor Carlos' tools to prevent infidelity and provides readers with the components necessary to ensure an "affair-proof" marriage. He candidly discloses his failures and struggles by sharing his own sometimes funny—sometimes gut-wrenching experiences. Most importantly, he relates life with scripture to ensure that believers can build God-centered connections that stand the test of time. "Screw it!" is the definitive guide for successful, healthy relationships.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Emphaloz Publishing House
• Release date: Apr 19, 2019
• ISBN: 9781386661528

Book preview

PREFACE

In 1991, I gained national attention on America’s Funniest Home Videos as the boy who literally screamed his ABCs while at a school program. I was just five years old when my family became the first African American’s to win America’s Funniest Home Video’s grand prize. We became instant celebrities. I remember vividly how quickly things started to change; I recall being in Jet magazine and appearing on several Today shows. It was exhilarating. I was far too young to be affected by the stress of it all.

But upon returning to school, I was repeatedly confronted by teachers and principals asking my family and me for money. Even people in our community and at church would be so bold as to request a share of our winnings.

Reflecting now, I realize that I began losing trust and faith in people at a young age. I started to believe that everyone wanted something from me.

Today, I am a husband, father of two beautiful children, and a non-traditional pastor–formally known as Pastor Carlos Jones II. However, as a man, I try every day to counter that lack of faith I had in people as a child by motivating and encouraging people to be the best version of themselves.

I had the pleasure of growing up in church. My family and I attended Community Fellowship Baptist Church of Missouri City, Texas (on the outskirts of Houston), where my father was the pastor. I am technically a third-generation pastor, as my great grandfather on my mother’s side was also a pastor. You might say it was destined for me as well. However, my journey was certainly different from theirs.

After graduating from high school, I accepted a football scholarship to Tennessee State University where I played from 2003 to 2007. In my freshman year, I joined the Fellowship of Christian Athletes, where I ultimately led a weekly Bible Study. During that time, I gained firsthand experience shaping and delivering messages to my peers. What I appreciated most during this time were the positive responses from my peers who truly grasped the message. And even when they didn’t get it, their questions challenged me to be better the following week. But, during this time, I began to question God. Like many, I wondered whether God was real, whether the Bible was legitimate, and whether Christianity had been put in place to validate the enslavement of black people.

The most pivotal time in my spiritual journey was during my senior year in college. At that time, I was introduced to a professor, Dr. Michael Brown, who gave a lecture about religion and creation. As I listened to his lecture, I began to realize that he had been answering many of the questions I had for some time about religion and God. I was so intrigued that I approached him after the lecture and told him I wanted to learn more. He advised me to apply to divinity school, and assured me that, if I got accepted, he would take care of everything else.

That night I returned to my apartment and made a promise to God. The promise was that, if I got into divinity school, I would not go to the NFL Combine (which was only a couple months away). For those who are not sure what the NFL Combine is, let me explain. It is an opportunity for college students to participate in physical and mental evaluation with the hope of being scouted by the NFL. The Combine was everything I had been preparing for, and I certainly did not think I would ever get into divinity school.

Imagine my shock when I was accepted into Candler School of Divinity at Emory in Atlanta, Georgia. True to my word, I didn’t go to the NFL Combine. Instead, I enrolled at Candler, and shortly thereafter, my eyes were opened to the different ways people saw God and the many ways theologians and philosophers interpreted and researched God.

I had been confronted (identified) with my purpose and forced to choose to either walk away or accept it. I decided to accept my purpose–God’s calling on my life. I accepted that I was put on this earth to educate and motivate people who may have not had a spiritual background or upbringing. It was my destiny to promote spiritual connection and insight. God had chosen me to serve as a voice in this generation. I accepted that purpose my first day of divinity school.

I studied at Emory University from 2007 to 2010 and gained experience preaching at churches and venues in Tennessee, Alabama, Florida, Atlanta, New Jersey, Oklahoma, Chicago, Louisiana, Arizona, Mississippi, Washington, DC, and Virginia. I even had the pleasure of preaching in the Bahamas. And it was in those times I completely submerged myself in the pursuit of my purpose. This is different from identifying it. Because after you come to learn what is expected of you, you must either choose to accept it or walk away from it. I discovered that my hunger and drive to further understand God and share his word were primary concerns in my life. I had found great joy in explaining truths to people who may not have had a spiritual background or upbringing. It’s only when I took pleasure in that purpose that I was completely activated.

Another important milestone in my spiritual journey occurred during my time at Victory Cathedral in Bolingbrook Illinois. Victory Cathedral was one of the largest platforms I have had the opportunity to minister on. Thousands were in attendance and streaming online across the world. That should come as no surprise since Victory Cathedral’s Pastor, Smokie Norful, is a Grammy award winning gospel artist. It was nothing