Thru God's Eyes I Begin To Be Wise (B&W Version)

By Yolanda Johnson

October 22, 1988: “Do not let God bring you home in a box or place you in the hospital”. These words spoken by my mother started to flood my mind. The previous year I had run away. I was heavily under the influence of drugs and alcohol. My eyes were bloodshot red and glossy. In the cold night, I begin walking towards the car. The Lor

• Language: English
• Publisher: LitFire Publishing
• Release date: Nov 20, 2019
• ISBN: 9781635241273

Yolanda Johnson

Yolanda Johnson is an Author that has been chosen by God before she was born. She is a faithful mother of five children and also the loving wife to Minister Donnie Johnson. Also, Yolanda accomplished a degree in Business. God has impressed a vision on her heart to open up a nonprofit organization called, "Rechanging Lives". This establishment caters to disadvantaged youth that need a second chance in life and look for ways to achieve a better future. Most of all, they will be encouraged to love the Lord with all their hearts (Mark 12: 30).

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Thru God’s Eyes: I Begin To Be Wise

New Improved Edition

Copyright © 2018 by Yolanda Johnson

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher or author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

Although every precaution has been taken to verify the accuracy of the information contained herein, the author and publisher assume no responsibility for any errors or omissions. No liability is assumed for damages that may result from the use of information contained within.

ISBN: 978-1-63524-127-3

Printed in the United States of America

LitFire LLC

1-800-511-9787

www.litfirepublishing.com

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Contents

Dedication vi

Through God’s Eyes ix

Chapter 1 Yol’ Moses 1

Chapter 2 My World Begin to Unfold 13

Chapter 3 We Lost Everything 22

Chapter 4 Gunshots Fired 32

Chapter 5 Never Back Down 42

Chapter 6 Forced To Testify In Court 54

Chapter 7 Back at it Again 63

Chapter 8 Love is like the Ocean 78

Chapter 9 Brokenhearted 91

Chapter 10 Lives Almost Taken 100

Chapter 11 Happy to see my Boys 107

Chapter 12 Making Some Changes 113

Chapter 13 Our lives are but a Vapor 121

Chapter 14 I Couldn’t Bear the Pain 128

Chapter 15 God Saved My Son 136

Chapter 16 Unconditional Love 142

Chapter 17 I was endued with Power from on High 149

Chapter 18 The Journey Begins 162

Epilogue 176

Contribution Page 178

Family Photos 179

Letters to the Author 197

Acknowledgements 200

Dedication

I dedicate this book to my Father which is in heaven. Without him, none of this would be possible. Also, this book is dedicated to my mom, Lois Jean Davis, and the entire Davis Family.

And she vowed a vow...

(1 Samuel 1:11).

In Loving Memory of Grandma

Shirley Mae Davis…

Through God’s Eyes

Through God’s eyes I began to be wise. His wisdom is more precious than gold; a very beautiful sight to behold.

Through God’s eyes I beheld the art of constellations and the light of the stars shined across all nations.

Through God’s eyes I ignited the torch of truth and the taste of lies became horrendously aloof.

Through God’s eyes He paused the pendulum of time. My days became as still as the night and the way righteousness reigned in my life.

Through God’s eyes my oblique expression became a holy profession testified among others as a gifted blessing.

Through God’s eyes freedom became attainable and the essence of liberty was fathomable.

Through God’s eyes fear exasperated and the dews of honesty were no longer fabricated.

Through God’s eyes I touched the heart of the sun and the moon of my past shed light into my future. I cried tears of ocean that reverently whist into the wind of devotion.

Through God’s eyes the whisper of silence poised the thoughts of peace and the brightness of serenity burned fervently.

Through God’s eyes I inherently accepted my poetic words as melodies of the sea and the waves of emotion flows genetically.

Through God’s eyes I walked through the mountain of knowledge and swam through the water of understanding. Every disoriented disease was divinely reprimanded.

Through God’s eyes!

- Byron K. Wilson

Chapter 1

Yol’ Moses

My grandmother, Shirley Mae, was with child at an early age. Young and desperate, she did not know how to raise a child. So, she made up in her mind to give up my mother, Lois Jean Davis, to my mom’s father, JW Macintyre, and his mother, Ila Turner. As a result, she took my mother over to their house and left her on the door step because she could not take care of her. Therefore, my great-grandmother raised my mom till she reached the age of fourteen. At that age, Momma Lois wanted to put the pieces of her life’s puzzle together. So, Great-Grandmother Ila decided to let my mom go and stay with her biological mother. One hot summer day, my mom met my daddy, William Lee Martin. It was love at first sight when she saw him at Greg’s Park in North Dallas. She was head over hills for him at a young age. Momma Lois liked tall men because she was only five feet tall, and tall, dark and handsome was my father. As time passed, mom and daddy started seeing each other more often on occasions. Therefore, she felt like she was ready to open up her heart to him. This decision led to her giving all of herself to him. Shortly afterwards, she lost her virginity. Whispering sweet nothings helped in the consequences behind premarital sex. Before long, my mom became pregnant. However, it never came to her realization until she started having headaches, began vomiting, and neglecting her daily tasks. Yet, she really did not have the courage to break the news to her mother. Nervousness, fear, and anger troubled her soul in the thoughts of what her mom might say or do to her. Grandma Shirley Mae arrived from a long hard day of work. Right away, my mom told her that she was pregnant. My grandmother was so angry because she saw herself all over again. Without any hesitation, my grandmother began to give my mom medication to terminate the pregnancy. However, instead of my mom swallowing the pills, she put them under her tongue. Momma Lois knew she had a little bundle of joy growing inside of her. Therefore, she prepared herself to go ahead and keep her baby. This was the biggest step she ever had to make in her entire life. Momma Lois only had a short time to be a child. Soon, she would become a mother. Her situation seemed hopeless. She did not know how she was going to raise her child. Nevertheless, nine months later, she delivered a beautiful baby girl: Yolanda Latricia Davis (Nun-Nun) on October 22, 1971 in Dallas, TX. My nickname was given to me by my cousin Terry when I first was born. I always wondered exactly what Nun-Nun stood for. Therefore, I did some research and found out that it means the unbounded servant, heir to the throne, selflessness,"the Shechinah - origin of the souls of Israel, and humility. No one ever knows what their name can mean. Sometimes, it can be a foretelling of your life.

From that point on, my mom’s life took on a whole new meaning after I was born. My daddy was in and out of my life after my mom delivered me. When I was a baby, they really did not have a serious relationship in comparison to what they had in the past: young and infatuated with each other.

When I was one month old, I was very ill and my mom thought that I had a real bad infection. Then all of a sudden, I begin to have a high fever, started throwing up, and my eyes became yellowish. Quickly, she rushed me to the emergency room and the Doctors started to run tests on me due to the color of my skin. When the test results came back, the Doctor informed my mom that if she would have waited a day later, I would not be here today. The sickness was called jaundice; a yellowish coloring of the skin, whites of the eyes, and various body tissues. My mom did not realize it then, but thankfully God impressed it on her heart to take me to the hospital. I looked at it as a blessing. Just as Moses was protected when he was a baby, so was I. And Pharaoh charged all his people, saying, Every son that is born ye shall cast into the river, and every daughter ye shall save alive. And the woman conceived, and bare a son: and when she saw him that he was a goodly child, she hid him for three months. And when she could not longer hide him, she took for him an ark of bulrushes, and daubed it with slime and with pitch, and put the child therein; and she laid it in the flags by the river’s brink. And his sister stood afar off, to wit what would be done to him. And the daughter of Pharaoh came down to wash herself at the river; and her maidens walked along by the river’s side; and when she saw the ark among the flags, she sent her maid to fetch it. And when she had opened it, she saw the child: and, behold, the babe wept. And she had compassion on him, and said, This is one of the Hebrews’ children (Exodus 1:22, 2:2-6).

At the age of three, my mom told me that her dad was killed when she was pregnant with me. My aunt’s boyfriend was fighting on my aunt and my grandpa tried to break it up. The two of them started wrestling with a blade and accidently cut my grandpa’s throat. There was blood everywhere. After that terrible incident, my mom had a lot of resentment toward my aunt. Nevertheless, Momma Lois kept my grandpa’s memories alive by telling me about how grandpa’s spirit always came to visit me when I was a baby. Nothing else mattered in the world to him then to see me happy and smiling; so, I always thought I was special coming up. As years passed by, I grew to become an energetic little girl. I was always moving and running around a lot; my mom could never keep me still. One particular day I recall falling and hitting my right eye on the corner of the coffee table in the living room. It left a big gash on my eye. However, I thank God that I did not have to go to the emergency room. Yet, the injury left me with a body scar that I have right to this day.

Reality had not really settled in for my mom. The need of living her own life began to overtake her. Therefore, after she had my brother, Ronald Davis (Mone), and two years later my baby sister, Latoya Davis Mitchell (Tasha), she decided to let my great-grandmother raise them in South Dallas; I was already living with my great-grandmother. Great-Grandmother Ila, Great-Grandpa Jimmy, and my Aunt Ethel took us all in with compassion. I really loved my great grandparents and aunt for what they did for us. They really spoiled me because I was the first grandchild living with them in the beginning. Life was just great for me and my younger siblings.

At age six, I entered kindergarten at J. W. Ray Elementary School in North Dallas. Our mom moved us in with Grandma Shirley. Momma Lois worked at her mom’s club and felt like she could now take care of us. For the first time in my life, I was trusted in the care of other individuals besides Great-Grandmother Ila and her husband Jimmy Turner. On another note, when my siblings and I visited them one day, all of our lives could have been cut short.

It was the summer of 1979 and my Uncle Kenneth took us to the store one evening and left the three of us in the car. We were at Hood’s Store in South Dallas when a red car pulled up right next to my uncle’s car. There was a little boy in the back seat and he began licking his tongue out at me. Very annoyed, I started licking my tongue back out at him. After five minutes had passed, I decided to turn away from the window; it was just in time to see my three year-old sister sitting in the driver’s seat. She must have climbed over when I was distracted. Before I could put her back into her own seat, she pulled the gear down and the car started rolling into a busy intersection.

Our lives could have shattered right before our very eyes, but a stranger out of nowhere opened the driver’s door and jumped right in. He put the car in park and it came to a complete stop. Next, the man put the car in neutral and started pushing it back up the hill where it was originally parked. Just then, my uncle came out of the store. All this time, he was unaware that the car had been moved. The man that saved us seemed to have disappeared into thin air. Perhaps he was an angel. For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways (Psalm 91:11).

Still today, my uncle does not know what happened to me, my brother, and my sister. We kept it a secret for a long time. Now I look back at that day as a historical and memorial event in my life. I could have been severely hurt or killed after the car rolled back into a busy intersection; remarkable and miraculous things just continued to happen in my life.

When I was seven, one Saturday I was over to Aunt Ethel’s house eating chicken. Without any warning, a chicken bone got stuck in my throat. Glory be to God that my aunt’s friend was over to her house at that time and by her being a Registered Nurse, she was able to help me. Right away, she began to do the Heimlich Maneuver on me because I could not breathe. My throat’s airway tightened up and I was frightened. Fear fell upon me because I could not swallow the bone. I was just in desperate need for it to come out some way. Finally, the bone came right out of my mouth. I thank God for allowing the Registered Nurse to be at my aunt’s house at that specific time.

Like the waves in the ocean tossed to and fro, I was back in forth between Great-Grandma Ila’s house and my grandmother’s house on my father’s side, Josephine Martin (Cooda) in North Dallas. When I was much younger, my grandfather on my father’s side of the family, Bill Martin, use to pay for the blue cabs to pick me up when I was at Great-Grandma Ila’s house. Grandpa Bill showed that there was not any difference between me and the other grandchildren. In fact, he reached out more to me than anybody in my father’s family.

My mother started to visit us a lot at Great-Grandma Ila’s house and not too long afterwards, we moved in with her into a home right next to my aunt’s house; Great-Grandma Ila lived across the street. We stayed in my mom’s house for about six months and then she applied for government assistant housing. The West Dallas area became our new home. We moved into the projects there, but we did not stay long. That transitional period was very hard for me because I really did not want to leave my great-grandparents. I had never left them before and was always use to them taking care of me. In times past, I visited my mom only on occasions because she liked to party and was not ready to fully take on her role as a mother.

We had a baby sitter to watch us all the time until we became teenagers. My mother and her siblings were very close. Therefore, my siblings and I use to visit her side of the family every opportunity we had. A particular time my mom should have been there is when her cousin, who was my second cousin, pulled his private part out in the open. He told me to perform oral sex on him, but I said, No. However, he grabbed my head and forced my mouth to his body. Despite this horrible incident, thank God he did not get a chance to penetrate because someone was coming up the stairs and he left me alone. I never told my mom what happened because I was afraid to tell her because she would have killed him or made sure he got thrown into prison. That was the first time I was sexually abused by a relative. I will never forget what occurred at that time in my life. The spirit of shame hanged over me for the rest of my entire childhood from this experience. Nevertheless, I have come into the knowledge that sexual predators prey on children’s innocence when they discern that the child has not had enough love and attention. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour (I Peter 5:8). No matter if someone is a family member, friend, neighbor, or enemy you have to be mindful that the person has the capability of becoming a threat to your life. Also, love your children unconditionally because I was a victim.

My mom stayed in West Dallas for another six to eight months. When her housing relocation came through, she took it and we started packing up. Our next move was to South Dallas. Momma Lois made the decision that we were to stay in the projects there: Bonton. This choice that my mom decided to make really disturbed me because I did not want to move back into the projects again. The kids there were bad and drugs produced a poor environment. However, I came across some very nice Hispanic children that took me and my brother in as family. They stayed diagonal from us and we always went over their house to play. Their mom even cooked for us whenever we came to visit them. Yet, one night their project caught on fire and the entire family died. Only one relative lived because he was able to escape. I was just so heartbroken after that event and severely traumatized but it did not take long for me to begin to see the light shine in my life.

At age eight, I was active and started playing sports, loved reading books so much that I had my own library, and included prayer in my life. I was a tom boy and always enjoyed playing football and challenging boys to racing. I was tough, but I never liked to fight. Provoking people to anger was never on my agenda. Being a trouble maker was something I was not known for. Bullying people was something I did not do because my great-grandparents were old fashioned. They shield me from confusion with children in the neighborhood and at school. Once my family got settled in our project, I cried day and night. I was afraid of the area we were living in. Whenever I went out to play, girls did not