How To Write Like an English Teacher: Non-Fiction Books, #1

By Joyce Freese

How To Write Like An English Teacher!

User friendly Humorous writing handbook

• You will learn:How you can immediately and confidently write A+ essays in any language by using EZ writing formulas.
• The 3 worst writing mistakes every student makes & how to avoid them.
• How basic EZ Writing Formulas will Guarantee an A+ essay paper every time.
• The hidden secrets of how English teachers really grade your essay papers.
• These EZ formulas will decide your future college, career, or promotion.
• How to write a great essay once and then repeat it again and again for future success.
• How to pass any essay writing test every time.

Dedicated to all of you who struggle to find your voice.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Callie Shay Publishing
• Release date: Mar 25, 2021
• ISBN: 9781393728863

Joyce Freese

I have always been a writer. At first, it was with an old-fashioned typewriter. Then, the Internet answered my dreams with Microsoft Word. I could now write faster and with convenience, all with spell check, a blessing for one who can't spell. Through writing, be it fiction or non-fiction, I found my voice and myself. I do not have enough lifetimes to write all the books I imagine. My Paranormal Thriller Series began when I sold a home that previously had been a funeral home. Upon crossing the threshold of any home, I feel an energy surge of those who have occupied the home, past and present. This quick surge of energy leaves its mark on me. I always thought that every Realtor felt this same electrical jolt. However, when I took a quick survey of all my Realtor friends, they looked at me like I was crazy. It  never happened to them, yet, it happens to me every time. Perhaps that is why I believe that Every Home has Its Own Secrets. Have you ever walked into a home and felt a sudden cold chill as if someone unseen breathed on the back of your neck? Or perhaps felt the silence that echoed a stillness known only to death? I have. All homes store their own private memories. Sometimes loving comfort or depressed sadness lingers. Other times, a collective numbness or lethargy exists. Occasionally, red hot anger can take your breath away. Even as its inhabitants change or depart, their experiences remain. Each person and event leaves an individual mark. This energy remains within its walls. Nothing is ever forgotten. Both In a Time of Smallpox Death Arrives and Unnoticed capture the energy of its occupants within its walls.

Book preview

Chapter 1.  Know the Formulas

Know the formulas = Know how to write.

This simple, user-friendly handbook will teach you how to write great essays immediately! You do NOT have to be a rocket scientist or an English teacher to catch on.

Remember: It’s simple.

Everything that I will teach you is based on learning simple writing formulas. There are only 5 easy ones to learn. (The rest are a bonus.) You are then on your way to writing the best essay you have ever written!

In the past, you may have experienced failure at writing essays. Perhaps you didn’t turn in some essays because you were afraid or didn’t even know how to begin. Well, your prayers have been answered.

Yes, I’m the crazy English teacher who will gently walk you down the path of success to writing A+ essays IF you do everything that I ask of you.

I will only ask you to do exercises that will immediately make you a better writer, nothing more! This no-nonsense handbook will quickly get you up and writing (and running if you can multi-task). There’s no academic jargon or complex instructions to make you feel overwhelmed. I promise. I’ve even added a little humor and life lessons.

(What more could you ask for?)

I personally tested each of these formulas in the high school and on the university level, and they do work! At the beginning of the year, most my students were pathetic writers. (I often wondered how they got as far in school as they did.) However, by the end of the semester, most of my students were writing at a graduate level. (No kidding!)

They simply learned the formulas and applied them. Just like I am going to ask you to do.

FYI: (This next short section may be a bit boring but hang in there. It gets better. You need to understand why you will be taught certain writing principles, so you understand what’s in it for you.)

Writing on a critical, informative, and argumentative level requires good basic writing skills that will not only enhance your potential of having a great career (and life, by the way) but will also boost your personal communication with your friends, family, and even strangers. (Yes, I know that you all know how to reach out on all the social media platforms.)

However, to communicate on an academic level that will guarantee you a better future, you must know the basics of great writing. As an added bonus, it will elevate your thinking above the mundane (where it’s at most of the time) to a higher critical level that will express what you really mean to say. (As a super bonus, you might even impress your friends and family.)

Simply put, you will no longer struggle to express yourself, but only, if you follow my precise instruction. In addition, you will be able to successfully pass any written essay test required of you, such as proficiency writing tests for college or graduate school entrance tests,

(So-o Are we all in agreement to learn the lesson?) Ok. Now we can begin.

First, understand my rules:

Do not speed-read this handbook. Absorb it as you would a video game. I know that many of you like to game on the Internet, but before you can become successful at gaming, you must (first) learn the rules and (second) have a strategy.

It’s simple: To succeed, you must learn the rules and have a strategy. It’s the same with writing (and in life).

Learn ALL the formulas in the order that they are given. Each one builds on the one before it. DO NOT get out of order. (That’s why the book begins on page 1 and not page 10. Get it?) Complete ALL the exercises. By the end of the book, you will have written an A+ essay. I promise.

Have a winning strategy: In other words, don’t give up. This is your future we're talking about, not your friends’ future, but yours. If you give up, failure is guaranteed. If you stick with it, success is guaranteed. Remember, it’s that simple.

Promise to begin. Do not go out and party with your friends. Stay home and read the rest of this book. You can’t have a future without committing to it. You have no time to waste, not even a minute. Commit yourself. (I don’t mean getting yourself locked up.) Decide. Make a decision, a good one, one that may actually change your life. Decide to finish this book. Make yourself proud by reading this book beginning to end. Even though it’s a small task, it nevertheless is a completed task that has been accomplished. (When was the last time you fully completed a task and felt good about it?)

I believe that one small, good decision can lead to bigger and better life choices. Remember, you need a strategy.

Learn the lesson. In life, if you don’t learn the lesson the first time, you will be put in various situations in which you are given another opportunity to learn the same lesson over and over again until you finally get it.  (Think of it this way: You will be stuck in time, repeating the same mistake until you learn the lesson. Kind of like your Mama smacking your forehead every time you forget to take the garbage out.)

My personal repeated lesson in life