Our Shattered Pieces

By M.E. Clayton

What do you get when your shattered pieces define you?

A secret that’s too shameful to share.

Molly
Molly Cavanaugh was shattered, and she knew this. She also knew there was no changing it. With a life of privilege, she had wanted for nothing. With great parents and an older brother that she trusted with her life, bad things weren’t supposed to happen to her. Still, she had to learn the hard way that she wasn’t as innocent as she thought she was.

With a secret that haunts her days and nights, Molly is working on loving herself the way she is. As long as she’s not hurting anyone else, she’s learning to accept what a lot of other people wouldn’t be able to. As a party planner for the rich, her imagine is everything and she can’t trust her secret to just anyone. So, when she meets Grayson Lewis, their one-night stand ends up turning into a lot more.

Grayson
Grayson Lewis was wicked, and he knew this. He also knew there was no help for it. He’d grown up with a wonder family that were as close as could be. With devoted parents, and a sister he’d die for, his future should have been a bright, shiny star. Then the unthinkable happened, changing him in ways he never imagined. Not the same guy he was, eleven years later, he’s still working through it.

With a secret that isn’t his to tell, Grayson knows the damage that comes with violating someone’s right to choose for themselves. He has spent ten years trying to understand what makes people tick because he desperately wants to understand what makes him tick. Always holding back, women are simply a pleasant distraction. So, when he meets Molly Cavanaugh, he’s not expecting for his world to change.

When life isn’t what it seems...
Ten years later, Molly has switch tactics from therapy to denial, but then she meets Grayson Lewis, as her brother has just married his sister. When dumb luck strikes, she finds herself learning more about the man than she could have ever imagined. However, it only makes her want him more.

Ten years later, Grayson is still doing his best to always be the gentleman, but then he meets Molly Cavanaugh, as his sister has just married her brother. When a one-night stand gives him a taste of the sexy party planner, he finds that he wants more. However, he ends up with something unexpected.

While it’s been six months since their one-night stand, can Molly see past her confusion long enough to keep from sabotaging what could be a good thing? Better yet, can Greyson see past his own confusion to give Molly what she needs?

NOTE: This book contains adult language, adult situations, explicit sexual encounters, and sexual degradation. If sensitive to any of the aforementioned issues, please do not purchase.

• Language: English
• Publisher: M.E. Clayton
• Release date: Mar 1, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005229412

M.E. Clayton

M.E. Clayton works fulltime and writes as a hobby only. She is also an avid reader and Pinterest addict. When she's not working, reading, writing, or on Pinterest, she is spending time with her family and friends, or her dog, Boy, or her cat, Seatbelt. She lives in California with her husband and enjoys doing nothing but reading. Seriously. She does nothing but read. However, that's how she likes it.

Book preview

Just a couple of things before I let you go and get your read on. While I am doing my best to work with better editing and proofreading software, all my books are solo, independent works. I write my books, proofread my books, edit my books, create the covers, etc. I have one beta who gives me feedback on my stories, but other than that, all my books are independent projects.

That being said, I apologize, in advance, for the typos, grammar inconsistencies, or any other mistakes I may make. Since writing is strictly a hobby for me, I haven’t looked into commitments in regard to publishers, editors, etc. My hope is that my stories are enjoyable enough that a few mistakes, here and there, can be overlooked. However, if you’re a stickler for grammar, my books are probably not for you.

Also, I am an avid reader-I mean an AVID reader. I love to read above any other hobby. However, the only downside to my reading obsession is when I fall in love with a series, but I have to wait for the additional books to come out. And because I feel that disappointment down to my soul, when I started publishing my works, I vowed to publish all books in my series all at once. No waiting here…LOL. Now, the exception to that will be if enough readers request additional stories based off the standalone, such as in Facing the Enemy. At that point, if I decide to move forward with a requested series, I will make sure all additional books are available all at once. As much as this is a hobby for me, I am writing these books for all of you, as well as myself.

Thank you, for everything!

Contact Me

I really appreciate you reading my book and I would love to hear from you! Now, unfortunately, because I do have a full-time job, and a family I love spending time with, at this time, I’m afraid it would be very hard for me to maintain a multitude of social media sites. However, for the sites I do participate in, here are my social media coordinates:

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Dedication

For my husband-

My Salvatore, Leonardo,

Vincent, Salvatore Jr., Emilio, Angelo, Dante, Remo,

Stone, Ross, Saxton, Fox,

Raven, Sebastian, Orion, Titan, Atlas,

Dash, Chance, Maddox, Crew, and Kadon

all rolled into one.

I love you.

Playlist

Light Me Up Again – Ingrid Michaelson

de·vi·ant

/ˈdēvēənt/

adjective

departing from usual or accepted standards, especially in social or sexual behavior.

con·form·ist

/kənˈfôrməst/

noun

a person who conforms to accepted behavior or established practices.

Conformists are born.

Deviants are made.

Prologue

The nightmare is like it always is. Unrelenting.

The memory is like it always is. Shameful.

The reality is like it always is. Inescapable.

The rationale is like it always is. Intangible.

And the experience of it all is like it always is. Detrimental.

Still, trying to make sense of it all was futile. Trying to understand how all this could be was pointless because I wasn’t sure there was even a reason for it.

I mean, was there?

Was there some scientific reason why we were drawn to such different lures. What made one person like the color blue, but someone else like the color red? What made someone love sports, while another person loved the arts? What made someone attracted to blondes, but another person attracted to brunettes?

Why did we like what we liked?

And why were we ashamed of some of the things we liked?

Who determines that our wants are shameful? If no one is hurt and it isn’t illegal, why aren’t certain things acceptable?

Judgement was everywhere and how lucky are we to find that one person who won’t judge us? Does that person even exist? Because even immoral people will judge other immoral people.

A rich businessman might snort cocaine while he’s at a convention in Las Vegas, but because he holds down a job and showers every day, he’ll dare to look down at a homeless drug addict as if they’re not both engaging in the same sin.

Is a man who cheats on his wife with his girlfriend any better than a man who cheats on his wife with anybody who is willing? I bet the wife doesn’t think so.

With every thrust into my body, I was wondering how it’s come down to this. I knew why things had to be this way. I knew this is what was expected. I knew this was the right and acceptable thing to do.

I knew it.

With my arms wrapped around his shoulders, I moaned out his name. I whimpered and cried out at all the right times. I begged for more and agreed that he was the best I’ve ever had.

Our bodies were intertwined in a dance as old as time, and while he was doing his best, he had no idea what he was dealing with. There was a disconnect that I wasn’t even sure I could explain. There was this…thing missing.

But why was it so hard to say something? Why couldn’t I tell him the truth? After all, he’s the one who opened my eyes to see what I can no longer unsee. He’s the one who introduced me to a world I hadn’t even known I wanted to be a part of. He’s the one who made it okay.

He’d been encouraging.

Knowing I wasn’t going to get any release, I did what I’ve been doing. I purposefully clenched myself around him, pretending to climax, yelling out his name, making him and his fragile male ego believe that he was what was bringing me to ecstasy, though it was a lie.

It was all a lie.

It hadn’t always been.

But it was now.

Part

I

Chapter 1

Molly~

Andre Morrison’s party is supposed to be the party of the year.

Gina laughed. That’s what you say about every party, Lauren.

Lauren just shrugged. Well, they all are if you know how to have a good time. She looked over at me pointedly.

My freshman year at UC Berkeley, I was a far cry away from Chicago where my family lived. My brother, Lorcan, was in his sophomore year at West Texas A&M and I missed him terribly, but we spoke often. Our parents were also in constant contact, though they were busy being Chicago royalty.

My father, Lorcan Cavanaugh the Second, was a brilliant doctor, and my mother, Emilia Cavanaugh, was the perfect socialite wife who was involved in so many charities that it was hard to keep track. However, as busy as they were, they still made time for their children.

I’m just not a partier, I remarked, truth in every word.

Oh, c’mon, Molly, Lauren whined. It’s been ages since you’ve gone out with us.

And with good reason.

Not everyone is interested in drunken parties, Lauren, Gina chimed in. Give Molly a break.

Gina was my dormmate and it’d been a blessing to be paired up with her. She was clean, neat, and minded her own damn business. Gina was here on scholarship, so she took her shit seriously. She understood what a gift it was to be here, and she never forgot it.

Lauren wasn’t our dormmate, but she did live in our dorm building and we’d met her on moving day when she’d been trying to carry all her shit by herself. And despite her privileged-party vibe, we’d all become this sort of odd threesome, but it worked for us.

Lauren sighed. I don’t get it, she huffed. Molly’s one of the prettiest girls here. She drives guys wild wherever she goes, and she couldn’t care less. I didn’t necessarily agree with that statement, but I knew I wasn’t ugly.

Where Lauren was your classic blonde bombshell, Gina was the beautiful brunette. Both had voluptuous bodies that drew attention, and both had cool personalities that made them very likable.

I was the petite one with black hair and grey eyes. Lorcan and I took after our father in looks, and while I had all the right body parts that marked me a woman, I didn’t have a huge chest or wide, sultry hips. I was five-foot-five and slim. I weighed pretty close to nothing, something Lorcan teased me about all the time.

Why would she care, Gina asked. She just got out of a relationship.

Six months ago, I had started dating Ethan Harris, and while Gina and Lauren had thought I was stupid for getting serious so quickly with a guy during my freshman year in college, Ethan had been charismatic enough to draw me in.

At six-foot-one, Ethan had dark brown hair, light brown eyes, an All-American face, and a body he kept fit by playing basketball. He was also lucky enough to have the type of complexion that always tanned and never burned.

And though I had lost my virginity in high school-a secret my brother knew nothing about-I had held off for two months before sleeping with Ethan and the buildup had been worth it. The first night we slept together had been everything. While I had lost my virginity in high school, it had been a one-time deal. Ethan had introduced me to new things and new sensations, and a part of me could admit that sex was one of the reasons I had let things get so serious so quickly.

I still think it’s ridiculous to get serious your freshman year in college, Lauren grumbled. I mean, talk about closing off so many other opportunities.

I almost laughed because Lauren couldn’t have been more wrong. Dating Ethan had not closed the door on other opportunities. Dating Ethan had busted all the doors wide open. Dating Ethan had been something I had never seen coming.

Now, however, it was something I saw every time I closed my eyes at night.

Well, it hardly matters anymore, I said, since we’re no longer dating.

Two weeks ago, I had called it quits. Finding out Ethan wasn’t who I had thought he was had been brutal and heartbreaking. While I hadn’t any plans on marrying the guy, I had trusted him in a way I had never trusted anyone else before, and he had betrayed me in the worst way.

And the worst part about it?

I couldn’t escape what’s been done. Every day was spent wondering if my secrets were going to be revealed because things had ended badly between us. And while it would be my word against his, whose side would the witnesses be on? That was the question.

And I was pretty sure it wouldn’t be mine.

I had made the same huge mistake that most young people did; I had trusted too blindly in a person who hadn’t deserved it.

Always in the moment, we never think that things will turn badly. We send nude selfies never thinking they’ll come back to haunt us. We tell our lovers our deepest, darkest secrets never thinking they’ll use them to hurt us later. We don’t think of the ‘what ifs’ when we’re in the middle of being in love. We don’t think of the ‘what ifs’ when we’re in our emotions and need to talk to someone.

We just don’t fucking think.

Well, you know what they say, Lauren sing-songed. The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

That’s where she was wrong. I didn’t need to get under someone else.

Ever.

I don’t need to get over him, Lauren, I told her. I broke up with him. Remember?

Same thing. She shrugged.

Gina gawked at her. No, Lauren. It’s not. Then she looked at her watch. Shit, I’m going to be late for class. It was Thursday and it was the only day that all our classes lined up to where we could all have lunch together on campus.

Gina was in college to get a degree in marine science and Lauren was in college to get a degree in civil engineering. I was here to get a BS in society and environmental studies. In high school, I’d had a blog that focused primarily on women and their empowerment. I had been involved in a lot of extracurricular activities like that, but had suspended and ended a lot of them because I hadn’t been sure what to expect from college and its time constraints, if any.

Yeah, we better head on back to class, I said, agreeing with Gina.

Cleaning up our remnants from lunch, Lauren said, Well, I’ll be going to Andre’s party if you guys change your minds.

We won’t, Gina said, speaking for the both of us.

Heading our separate ways, I walked back to class with my head down and doing my best not to notice anyone who I didn’t need to notice. It wasn’t that I was shy or stuck up because I was neither.

I was just trying to survive the day.

Chapter 2

Grayson~

You don’t understand, though, Eric said.

Dude, pussy is pussy, Travis argued. I mean, seriously.

Eric shook his head. "That’s where you’re wrong, my friend. Pussy is not pussy."

Jesus Christ, I muttered. You guys are acting like you’re fourteen-years-old.

It was a Tuesday, so we were all at the apartment, the night being a low-key one. Eric Randall, Travis White, and I all shared a three-bedroom apartment in Boston, all three of us attending Boston University.

You’re just saying that because you have to, Eric argued. You’re all loved-up, so you can’t admit that there might be better pussy out there.

While I was in a monogamous relationship with someone, I wasn’t all ‘loved-up’. Sure, Katy was cool to hang out with and all, and we’ve been going strong for about a year, but