Third Stone From the Sun

By James Hold

It was a matter of time before Akkadia, the Abracadabrical Amazon, should encounter Moolactus, the Milker of Worlds, and his herald, the Screwy Skater. Can she survive this cosmic crisis, or is Earth doomed?

If you're familiar with the original Fantastic Four meeting with Galactus and the Silver Surfer, you should get a kick out of this. Even if you don't know the story on which this spoof is based, there's nothing to keep you from enjoying it.

NOTE: I'm offering this story in a PDF only. The screenplay format I used is not compatible with Nook or Kindle. My apologies.

• Language: English
• Publisher: James Hold
• Release date: Mar 23, 2020
• ISBN: 9780463775738

James Hold

"First you're an unknown, then you write one book and you move up to obscurity." — Martin MeyersI published my first book in 2004. It became an immediate collector's item. I have several hundred copies collecting dust in my attic. Critics everywhere said it belonged between Ernest Hemingway and Robert E Howard—on an alphabetical bookshelf.My influences include Rocky & Bullwinkle, 1950s sci-fi movies, and silver-age comics.I live in Texas with my wife and four cats. You can contact me at [e-mail].

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Third Stone from the Sun

By James Hold

Copyright 2020 James Roy Hold

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Secrets of Akkadia 11

Third Stone from the Sun

So you I will put to an end

FOREWORD: A COSMIC CROSSOVER

This story is written in a screenplay format like that employed by Nigel Kneale in his Quatermass novelizations. There are times when a writer grows weary of constant iterations of he said (despite Elmore Leonard's sacred Gospel) and I welcomed the opportunity of letting dialogue carry the load. The reader can judge if my experiment succeeds or fails.

Appreciation is due to Stan Lee and Jack Kirby who were responsible for the original Fantastic Four issues 48 thru 50 which inspired this spoof. I'd like to think they'd find it amusing. Thanks too to Jimi Hendrix for the title and opening quote.

Humor and satire are subjective so it's best to take it for what it is. In any event, I hope you enjoy my little effort.

PROLOG: TILL THE COWS COME HOME

Texas is famous for two things: oil and cattle. Some entrepreneurs combine the two by selling burgers and fries. Cows are sensitive creatures, while the Earth keeps her own secrets. Whatever the reason, each had stopped producing, and farmers and drillers alike were growing nervous. Potato growers and fry cooks too. Then things got even weirder.

SCENE — The grounds surrounding Akkadia's tower overlooking the San Jacinto River. A crowd of dairy farmers have gathered there, seeking aid.

FARMER HITE: So I'm sitting in my den listening to Canned Heat's 'Fried Hockey Boogie' when I hear this knock at my door. It's a cow. She says, You can stop now.

Akkadia listens to Farmer Hite's account with interest. When the small collection of dairy farmers showed up outside her tower, she'd immediately popped down to see what they wanted, prompting a