Mom ... Let's Talk

By Robert Mark Schaeberle and Jeanne Schaeberle

Poetry by Robert Mark Schaeberle, Memoir by Jeanne Schaeberle What does a son do when he hears voices? Withdraw? Or use his sword, poetry to defend himself? How does a mother handle family life and death and work through horrible grief? Mom...Let's Talk offers insight to the power of healing through writing and the sense of chaos revealed in the poetry. visit website JeanneSchaeberle.com

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu Publishing Services
• Release date: Aug 3, 2017
• ISBN: 9781483472089

Book preview

Mom…

Let's Talk

The Healing Power Through

Writing and Poetry

Poetry by Robert Mark Schaeberle

Memoir by Jeanne Schaeberle

Copyright © 2017 Jeanne Schaeberle.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted by any means—whether auditory, graphic, mechanical, or electronic—without written permission of the author, except in the case of brief excerpts used in critical articles and reviews. Unauthorized reproduction of any part of this work is illegal and is punishable by law.

ISBN: 978-1-4834-7209-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4834-7208-9 (e)

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Lulu Publishing Services rev. date: 7/24/2017

Remembering

Robert Mark Schaeberle

July 2, 1975 to July 9, 2000

All proceeds from this book will go directly to Humanim

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Editor’s Note

It was my privilege to get to know Robert Schaeberle through his poetry and through his mom’s cathartic memoir. Each writer’s work represents a heroic quest for peace and sanctuary, made by individuals who will remind you of someone you know.

Mom is every mom who is or has been the foundation from which family thrives. Jeanne’s ruminations on a religious upbringing and the challenges she faced as a teenager and later a parent, juxtaposed against Robert’s poems, bring his poetry into focus.

The poems reveal a boy’s life initially filled with wonder and gentleness, which was invaded by the awful mental dragons of terror and desperation. These poems are Robert’s sword of battle, forged in the fire of hope. His hope was born from the strong bonds of love between mother, son, and family, along with a deep faith in the power of God and His angels. It is ironic that Robert’s heart failed him at 25, because his heart also drove him to be the best he knew how to be, in spite of his mental turmoil.

"Mom…Let’s Talk" is for young people who are slaying their own dragons and wondering if they can triumph. This book is also for parents, guardians, teachers, and others who care about or work with artistic kids, especially poets and writers who struggle with remaining whole in a fractured world.

Linda Joy Burke

Poet & Writer

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Acknowledgements

Encouragement and prayers from family and friends throughout the years have made this book possible. I would like to acknowledge Riverside Café in Columbia, Maryland and Lakeside Café, same location new owner for the quiet retreat where I met my editor, Linda Joy Burke, and developed a valuable relationship.

Linda Joy Burke is a very sensitive person and poet who treated me with kid gloves for two years while we explored my relationship with Robert. All Linda Joy had to say was, I don’t know what you mean by that," and I would ramble on to her what I meant and the story became clearer. Linda Joy, I cannot thank you enough for taking on this project. Meetings with you became my therapy.

I often consulted with my brother Fred about some stories and he had the same approach as Linda Joy. What do you mean? I want to know more about this." Sometimes I was frustrated with both of them. Then after ten days of frustration, I would return to the manuscript and see their point, I was finally able to relive the moments and tell the story.

On Robert’s behalf, I thank Humanim for the support they gave him and the encouragement that helped Robert pursue publishing his poetry.

Our son, Steven, worked on the cover design. Sharon Tarlton created the family tree design on our garage wall. Finally, thank you Mark for help with the technology stuff.

Contents

Editor’s Note

Acknowledgements

Prologue

Introduction

Part I:   Mumykins

Mumykins

July 2, 1975

You Little Stinker

Let’s Talk … About Mickey Mouse

A Gift of Poetry

Poem About Me

Rain

Winter

Gingerbread

Part II:   Quests

Simple Adventures

Quests

The First Spaceship

Finding A Higher Power

The Avatar Warrior•

Dreams

The War of Angels and Devils

Embraced by God

Sacraments

From Confession To Reconciliation

Part III:   Chief Executive Ogre

Let’s Get Physical

Communication

Basic Family Rules

Rude Awakenings

Black Abysmal

Social Relationships – Family Loyalty

Wake-Up! We’ve Got Some Real Hard Stuff to Deal With

Overwhelmed

Good Medicine, Bad Medicine

Part IV:   Shabes The Dragon Slayer

Shabes the Dragonslayer

9th Grade Essay

The Ice Empress

Romancing the Heart

High School-Strategy Club

Everyday Typical Shaebs

Part V:   Midnight Madness

Leaving Home

Rock, Rock, Rocking

Choosing Higher Education

Davis and Elkins College

Food is the craving

Keeping the Faith

Doom, Death and Punishment

Haunting Chaos at the Spine of My Soul

Voices

From my dreams

Caffeine Crash/Midnight Madness

I feel right now

Falling Snow Flakes

Snowflakes and flurries fall

Omega Madman

The Insane Pain

The torment manifesting voice wanna shut em up

The Color of Chaos

Slayer of The Satanic Sentinels

Part VI:   Safeguarding My Sanity

Selfless

John Vincent Eustis

Human I Am

Weasel

Roosters

COW

Rabbit

SNOW OWL

The Battle against the Dark

Just Tell Me.

Tom

Family

How Do We Move On? How Do We Grieve?

A Special Thanks

Have A Nice Day

Freedom of Information Act

Safeguarding My Sanity

Sadness and Joy

Warrior Omega Supreme

Part VII:   Mom

On the Eve of Christmas

Mom Could You Use Some Help?

Mom

Part VIII:   Angels

To my Mom

Angel in My Pocket Devil by My Side

Robert Mark Schaeberle Resource Room

Humanim

Epilogue

What do I do with the stuff?

About the Author

Prologue

Getting Real, A Journey of Faith

and Expression of my Spirituality

This seems like a good time to stop and just breathe. The journey I took to write this book has been difficult, joyful, and bittersweet. I want to start by saying I just loved being a mother. That said I never wanted to marry or be a mother. I had set my mind on being a professional woman from a young and tender age.

When I was little, I did not like playing with dolls and other domestic related things. I liked climbing trees, playing cowboys and Indians, and riding my bike. As I grew, I became a committed Christian. I was a devout Catholic who was determined to serve and make the world a better place in my own quiet way. Well, I did live a quiet life and in many ways, I have served. What I did not do was keep my commitment to my self.

I was 27 and had been working full time for nearly ten years when I realized I needed a life. When I work on a project, I immerse myself heart and soul, and because of that, I felt burned out. I divided my time and energy between my career and my family’s needs at home.

My father, who was only 52 at the time, had his first heart attack. At a certain point, I felt like I was working on a nervous breakdown myself. The tension at home interfered with my work. I quit my job and took the time off from working to help my parents. I drove them to doctor’s appointments, and spent long hours in various waiting rooms, watching boring television shows and reading magazines. I was there to give them emotional support, but wound up feeling drained.

In hindsight, taking this direction in my life was a bad decision. Family needs became my priority. I soon learned that I didn’t like sitting around while waiting for my parents to finish their appointments. When things settled down for my parents, I went back to work as a temp employee, working at George Washington University Hospital in Washington, D.C. I met Philip Mark Schaeberle while working there.

The night after I met him, I went home and told my mother that I would give this guy one week to ask me out and if he didn’t I would ask him. Well, he did ask me out. Our first date was on April Fool’s Day.

We went to see the Barnum and Bailey Circus. The day our eyes locked in the Nuclear Medicine Department at George Washington, I felt the chemistry between us. When we went on our first date, I knew that chemistry was real, and my life changed forever. Not right away of course.

We dated for three years and became very good friends. He wanted to marry me, and when he asked the first time, I told him I would be a friend, but