Loving My Father: A Remarkable Life
()
About this ebook
Related to Loving My Father
Related ebooks
Fairy Tale to Murder Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCinderella, The Church, and a Crazy Lady: Once Upon a Twist Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Little Sparrow Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsReluctant Witness Caring for Dad on His Journey Home Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEverything Is Spiritual: Finding Your Way in a Turbulent World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Orphan Spirit: A Memoir Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFear of the Tide: The Untold Story of a Cuban Rebel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFlame and Song Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBipolar Parent Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Many Faces of Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWorthless No More Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCracked Shell: Life as an Emerging Scapegoat Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCinnia’S Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIt's Just Me: My Real Life Test Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMy Life Through Hoops... A Full Circle Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Love You Grandma... I Love You Too!: A Tribute to Grandmothers Everywhere Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRight Hand of God: Prophets Journey Vol. One Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOn a Mission: Strength, resilience, compassion – policing with attitude Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMangoes in the Rain: No One Can Take Away Your Imaginations Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Apricot Outlook of Katherine Koon Hung Wong Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHonour and Shame: Breaking the Silence Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMotherless Child: stories from a life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Never Alone: A Medium's Journey Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Footprints Of Her Soul Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMastering All That I Am: A Master's Journey Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsNecessary Mourning: Healing the Loss of a Parent through Jewish Ritual Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsForbidden Secrets: Finding a Voice in the Wilderness Through the Shepherd's Rod and Staff Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDriven by Love: From Islam to Christ Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsAtlas: From the Streets to the Ring: A Son's Struggle to Become a Man Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Angel by My Side Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Relationships For You
How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5All About Love: New Visions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dumbing Us Down - 25th Anniversary Edition: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges: 60 Habit-Forming Programs to Live an Infinitely Better Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries with Kids: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex: Creating a Marriage That's Both Holy and Hot Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries Workbook: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5ADHD: A Hunter in a Farmer's World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: The Narcissism Series, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Art of Loving Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Codependence and the Power of Detachment: How to Set Boundaries and Make Your Life Your Own Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5My Grandmother's Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Reviews for Loving My Father
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
Loving My Father - Charisse Feliberti
Loving
My
Father
Written by
Charisse Feliberti
In loving Memory
of
Dr. Manuel Feliberti
May 2, 1917 – October 19, 1985
Dedication
I dedicate this book, with my deepest love and affection, to my children, Shawn Marie, Ivan Raul, Wesley James, Ashley Charisse, and Christie Ann.
I would like to add my grandchildren, Amaya, Gabriel, and Kinsey.
They are the ones that have given me the love, strength, and inspiration to write. They are the continuation and future of the circle of life that my father begun.
I write this book with hopes that they will learn the beauty of he, who started it all. They did not have the opportunity to enjoy his life. However, the words contained herein, should fulfill their curiosity in regards to the man I called my father.
Introduction
I lost my father in 1985. He was 68 and I was 23 years old. The years we shared, developed a love that endured way beyond his death. The years we shared taught me lessons that I have carried with me and applied through time. The years we shared provided a foundation for a life filled with love, guidance, belief in God, and a reason to pay forward the encouragement that he provided. My father was one man with one story. A story that once told, will influence, inspire, and teach that love is powerful, everlasting, and unconditional.
I decided to write the story of the experiences, events, and remarkable life that he had. I understand this is a personal account, but it includes a story that is filled with courage, love, faith, family, culture, dedication, personal growth, responsibility, values, and life.
As I looked back at the years we shared together, I realized there is a message in his story that needs to be heard. It needs to be told. It needs to be put into words. Dad was an inspiration in my life. He taught me right from wrong. He taught me to be myself. He taught me to not conform to the world. He taught me to have my own voice. But most of all, he taught me about love, the kind that is unconditional, the kind that is everlasting.
Through the years, I learned what is like to have someone by my side that strengthened me from within, that believed in me, and stood by me no matter what. When all failed, he taught me to believe. It is to him who I owe my love for God, and my belief in an eternal life.
For the reader, this story will provide inspiration, belief, and the understanding of the power of unconditional love. This story will take you through an adventure of a life that was beautiful, giving, caring, and understanding. There are culturally rich travels and lessons learned along the way. There are family experiences that you will cherish and relate to.
As a reader, when you are finished reading this book, you will be inspired by a life that I had the privilege to call my father’s life; a life lived by faith, a live that inspired hope, a life that exemplified the meaning of unconditional love.
Copyright 2014 by Charisse Feliberti
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems without permission in writing from the pubhisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review
ISBN 978-1-312-43015-0
Chapter 1
Dad, Mom, Family
I am sitting in my home office staring at a picture of my dad when he was exactly the age I am today, 50 years old.
papi mamiManuel (papi) & Norma (mami) – Europe 1967
The picture was taken in 1967. He looked so happy, young, and full of life. The smile he portrays is the same smile I remember. He always smiled with his lips together, wrinkles around his eyes, and a kind of dimple in his cheek. He is standing by mom’s side. Mom is carrying my baby sister, Camille, in her tummy. She bears a soft smile, too. There are two pigeons eating from their hands and many more surrounding them. In the background is a bronze statue of a lion and a beautiful building somewhere in Europe. The lion statue reminded me of dad, strong, brave, and a king of kings. Their attires are proper of the time, dad’s suit is dark, and mom’s coat is light. They were opposites, they were different, but they complemented each other, like the sun and the moon. They were meant for each other. They were in love, a love that lasted, a love that was unbreakable. I looked at them and realized how happy and young both looked.
Before I realized it, a rush of beautiful memories flooded my mind. Oh! Life has gone by so fast. It seems like yesterday I was a happy young child seating along dad’s side. I was born the seventh of eight children on September 1962. The age spread of siblings was from my birth up to 22 years old. Yes! There was a huge gap. When I was born, dad was already 45 years old. Just a few years later, grandchildren were born. Therefore, I grew up with my nieces and nephews, at least for a short while. At the time of my birth, life was still peaceful and family was number one.
scan0006From left to right – Titi Cecilia, Norma (mom), Titi Chelo, Grandma Tomasa (middle in Wheelchair), Titi Pura, Tio Woodrow and Tio Lancy. - 1971
Dad and mom came from a family of eight siblings, each. I remember the family events. There were always so many people, aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, grandpa, friends, and neighbors. I was thought to be the last of the first generation of cousins on dad’s side of the family. I believe my oldest cousin at the time was at least 30 years older than me. The family celebrated my baptism and the end of a generation, for three days. It was quite a party.
All of my father’s side of the family attended. There were all the uncles and aunts, all the cousins, and us. All stayed at my godfather’s house for the full three days. There are family stories relating to those days. There were so many, that some slept in beds, others in couches, others by putting chairs together, others on the floor, and the rest wherever they could lay their head. It did not matter to them. They were together, they were enjoying themselves, and they were celebrating.
However, as I mentioned earlier, mom did have one more child five years after my birth. She had a beautiful baby girl. She was a surprise, but the kind that is good. I was so happy to be a big sister. I would finally have someone to share my things with. What I did not know was that this event would change my relationship with mom, and dad and I would develop a closer relationship. Up to this point, wherever mom went, there I was. Mom would watch TV with me, she would play with me, and would take me to the school she taught at, so that I could spend the day with her in her classroom. I was her tail. I followed her around the house no matter where she went.
scan0001Norma (mom) & Charisse (me) - 1963
Mom looked for ways to keep me entertained. She would clean the porch and let me play with the soapy water. In the afternoons, she would take me to Don Bauzo’s
home store to pick out candy and a drink. He lived a few houses down from us. I looked forward to that special treat, each day. I looked up to mom. I admired her and loved spending time with her.
Chapter 2
Dad Takes Notice
All changed once my baby sister was born. Mom was busy with the new baby. Although not on purpose, I was not given the same attention as before. I wanted mom’s attention. It was difficult to understand why she spent so much time with Camille. Camille kept her busy. Mom was not doing anything out of the ordinary. New babies require constant attention.
Dad realized I was sad. He understood that I was missing the special times with mom. The distance between mom and I grew farther away, nevertheless, dad and I grew closer. At night, I could not fall asleep easily. Dad would lie in bed next to me. He would read a book while he waited for me to fall asleep. He loved to read books, specially the ‘Agatha Christie’ mystery series. At one point, he owned the whole collection.
Dad was a medical doctor. His specialty was Epidemiology, but he served as a family doctor. He had an office at home. The office included a room for his desk, the examining room, and the X-Ray room. The X-ray machine in the room reminded me of a giant mechanical monster. I use to pretend that it was the leader of an alien invasion. This was awesome.
In the years that followed, I saw patients come in and out. Many brought him baskets of eggs, chickens, or homemade casseroles in lieu of payment. He took care of them even if they could not pay with money. He, also, made home visits. He started taking me along. I met some very nice people during the visits. I always stayed in the living room while he attended the sick in their bedrooms.
He always carried the black doctor’s bag. In it there was a stethoscope, blood pressure cuff, and other instruments. I remember the two, because I played with them. He would let me listen to my heart. I thought that was the coolest thing in the world. He would put the blood pressure cuff on my arm and blow it up so I could have fun and see how it worked. I thought the black bag was filled with magic and interesting gadgets. Whenever I watch classical movies and the doctor carries a black bag, my memory drifts to these days. Those were good days.
On Saturdays, he worked at a local hospital. He saw patients there, too, some in their rooms, others in the office. The office was located on the first floor of the hospital. There he saw patients by appointment. At the time, I was enrolled in Saturday ballet classes. The classes where short compared to his work hours, so he would take me to class on his way to the hospital. A couple of hours later, he would pick me up, I would spend the rest of his working hours at the office with him.
The nurses and the patients did not seem to mind that I was there. Actually, all of them treated me very nicely.