Collected Thoughts

By Jenne Lichty

A gathered bunch of random musings on topics affecting many women today: from marriage, momming, special needs, faith and everything in between, Jenne approaches the gory and glory in it all letting her funny bone lead the way. Running the gamut from inspirational and thought-provoking to laugh-out-loud funny, every entry is authentic and true to life. Written in quick, easy-to-read selections in the social media standard that so many are used to today, each entry provides a lighthearted pick-me-up or a mind snack to chew on throughout the day.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Thomas Nelson
• Release date: Nov 12, 2019
• ISBN: 9781400327935

Jenne Lichty

Walking away from her role as a special education teacher to homeschool their two autistic kiddos, Jenne and her family also made a huge switch to live out a simpler, more intentional lifestyle. Her husband gave up his fancy schmancy corporate gig to become a professor and they moved to a horse farm where they run a special needs Equine Assisted Learning program.

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Marriage

A couple of lessons I’ve learned along the way:

1. Never go to bed angry—It’s sound advice the bible gives. All that happens is you get angrier because he’ll still fall asleep inside of 4.5 seconds, which in turn makes you lose sleep, so that in the morning you’re too tired to put in the effort to remember what you were angry about the night before anyway.

2. Never keep score—Firstly, because math sucks and trying to keep mental tallies is exhausting and keeping hard copy tallies is weird and secondly, because if you both approach each day/situation with the intention of putting your spouse first and making him/her happy, you both reap the benefits, and it never feels uneven.

3. Don’t become strangers—Be sure to gross your kids out on a daily basis with excessive PDAs.

4. Play to your strengths—Don’t sweat it if it ends up making your household run like it’s in the 1950s. If you’re good at laundry and cooking and cleaning and he’s good at vehicle maintenance and finances, own it! It’s way better than having itchy undies because too much detergent was put in the washer….

5. Decide early on that farts are funny.

So I’m not a nagging wife. I make a point of it actually. But I have to admit I can come pretty close if it has to do with something I’m really stuck on… yeah, let’s be honest I can be super irritating. Like a hair in your mouth you can’t get. Or a whistle in your significant other’s nose when it’s quiet. Or a sock that keeps slipping into your shoe. Yep, I can be a wheezing hairy slouch sock. See, many of my creative visions require bulging biceps, or the ability to drive a massive truck and trailer, neither of which I possess. Thank goodness my hubby inevitably opts to shut me up because, frankly, I start to annoy myself….

One of the best things we ever did was have our kids early in our marriage—this way, we never knew what it was like to have money.

Hubby: What’s for dinner tonight?

Me: BLTs… I’m totally craving them.

Hubby: Sounds awesome.

Two hours later…

Hubby: I’m headed into town for gas. Do you need anything?

Me: Yeah, perfect! We need bread, lettuce, bacon, and tomatoes.

Hubby: Sooooo, all we had was mayo?

Me: Oh, and mayo.

I’ve learned that perspective plays a major role in more than just identifying whether an art project was done in grade 1 or grade 10…. The washing machine that came with the house croaked very suddenly. At least it didn’t suffer. After letting the rinse cycles drain into buckets and wringing out two loads by hand, I put it out of my mind to prepare for the company that was coming. My hubby went out to get a few things and came home one hour before the company was to arrive with the announcement Your new washer will be here in twenty minutes! (note: the laundry room is directly off the kitchen in full view without a door. Proceed…).

I had the opportunity to react with one of two perspectives:

A. "What?!?! They’ll be here in an hour, and I’ve already washed the floors and staged the house (yeah I do that… don’t judge). I still have some food prep to do, and now we need to move the old machine out after ripping out the countertop to get the new, larger washer in, move the kitchen table, wash the floor under the old machine, rewash the rest of the floors after boot traffic in and out..."

Or

B. You sweet, sweet man. You knew how important a washing machine is in this household, and you didn’t want me to be without for days on end. You picked out the perfect model (even though you don’t even know where the on" button is on the old one because that’s my domain), knowing just what features I need and which ones I would never use because you listen to my offhand comments, and you picked a white one because you knew I couldn’t handle a dual-coloured pair. Thank you."

I opted for B, and man what a difference it made to the day! Here’s to always taking a positive perspective on situations that come our way.

Our marriage is aging like a fine wine: it’s an acquired taste and lots of crud has settled over time.

Marriage is a full-time job, not just a hobby that you give whatever you have left at the end of your day to pursue. If you had to apply for marriage like you do your dream job, your CV should list skills and abilities such as the following:

Communication: formulating questions deeper than Did you pick up milk?

Ability to work under pressure: managing to snag a welcome home kiss even with bickering kids, a barking dog, and a pot of pasta boiling over on the stove in the background.

Time management: recognizing the importance of scheduling time alone together in the midst of regular tasks and routine appointments.

Conflict resolution: always completing this responsibility before going to bed.

Adaptability: willingness to eat peanut butter sandwiches on the couch at 10 pm in order to make a dinner date work.

If you opt instead to just list years of experience, be prepared to be passed over for the incredibly fulfilling dream marriage you were hoping for and settle in for a long forty years of factory line monotony.

When your first apartment as a married couple looks out over a septic tank manufacturing plant and your first house is across the street from a known crack den but you still hang a home sweet home sign in each, you know your marriage is in it for the long haul.

The great divide, the swale, invisible fence, border patrol,