Road Map to Happiness

By Phil C Hardy

This book is a practical, proven Life Education guide based on fifty years of professional experience in IT, management consulting and life mentoring - working in Europe, Asia, USA and Australia with client staff and individuals in expanding their understanding of who they are and how to make the most of their potential, living and working in Harmony - within themselves, their family, school/workplace and community.
It focuses on developing quality relationships and joy in our life through improved Self and Life Wisdom - gradually improving our personal attributes while expanding our creativity, intuitive excellence and working in collaborative unity with all.
There is also a separate chapter devoted to developing Family Harmony.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Phil C Hardy
• Release date: Jun 29, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463341353

Phil C Hardy

Born & raised in Brisbane Australia. Been in IT since 1967 - IT and management consultant since 1973. Worked in Europe, Asia, Africa, USA, Australia and New Zealand. Focused on improving efficiency, effectiveness and harmony in organisations. Married with 3 sons. Now retired to the Perth hills in Western Australia. Recently wrote my first book 'Road Map to Happiness' covering my life journey towards living in harmony. Just finished writing the follow up 'Living in Harmony' which mentors readers towards developing harmony in their lives.

Book preview

LIFE TOOLS

A LIFE ROAD MAP

a Health and Harmony ‘Life Support Kit’

QUESTIONS to ask ourselves

May EACH Day be one of ever EVOLVING:

Acknowledgements and Dedications

Chapter 1: INTRODUCTION

What the world needs now is HARMONY

SELF-EVIDENT LEARNING and HARMONIOUS LIVING - Explanation

SELF-EVIDENT LEARNING – an introductory exercise

Chapter 2: OUR LIFE’S FOUNDATION STONES

OUR PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES

BODY, MIND, EGO and INTUITION

LIFE WISDOM: Consciousness; Emotional Intelligence; Discerned Choices; Lessons Learned

Chapter 3: BACKGROUND

TOTAL TEAM INVOLVEMENT

NOT JUST FOR THE WORKPLACE

‘MENTORment’ NOT MANAGEMENT

BECOMING TEAM PLAYERS & VALUED EMPLOYEES

Chapter 4: THIS GUIDE

BE DISCERNING

KEEP IT SIMPLE

FOCUS ON POSITIVE INTENT

HAVING A GO

Chapter 5: SELF-EVIDENT LEARNING

FORMAL EDUCATION

LEARNING FROM LIFE EXPERIENCE

NO LIFE SKILL TRAINING

HOW WE CAN PROGRESS

Chapter 6: EXPERIENCE

Chapter 7: EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

CHANGING HOW WE REACT

Chapter 8: KEY PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES – Attitude; Respect; Enthusiasm

OPEN-MINDEDNESS

ENTHUSIASM

Chapter 9: HOW and WHAT WE ARE

Living with Nature

OUR MINDS AND INTUITION

Chapter 10: WHO WE ARE

COMMUNITY OR PERSONAL FOCUS

WHY CONFLICT?

ACCELERATING OUR UNDERSTANDING & SELF-WISDOM

IMPARTIAL OBSERVATION

Seek and Pursue our Intuitive Life EXPLORATION/CALLINGS

Chapter 11: OTHER KEY PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES

BALANCE, HARMONY, CONTENTMENT AND PERSONAL FREEDOM

THE VITAL IMPORTANCE OF OUR PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES

Chapter 12: THREE OTHER CONSIDERATIONS

INTUITION v EGO

Chapter 13: FIVE KEYS TO HAPPINESS

HOW IMPORTANT AM I?

PAUSE Button – a ‘Magical’ Life Tool

ATTRACTION and DISCERNMENT

Chapter 14: SEVEN CRITICAL TIMES IN OUR LIVES

CHOOSING OUR CAREER

BEING PARENTS; GRANDPARENTS; Guiding Our YOUNG

Chapter 15: SUMMARY of SELF-EVIDENT LEARNING

Chapter 16: DISCERNMENT – Making Optimum Life Choices

Our DISCERNMENT & Aptitude Ratings (DAR)

Developing DISCERNMENT

Chapter 17: HARMONIOUS LIVING – Embracing It

LIFE PATTERNS GREATLY AFFECT OUR RELATIONSHIPS

Chapter 18: HARMONIOUS LIVING – Doing It

THE IMPORTANT FACTORS

IMPLEMENTATION - CRITICAL SUCCESS FACTORS

DOING IT

BUILDING WISDOM DAILY

Developing True CONFIDENCE & HARMONY

Chapter 19: WHAT ABOUT NOW

HARMONY AND POSITIVE INTENT AT ALL TIMES

Chapter 20: FAMILY HARMONY

Upskilling PARENTS – Mentoring CHILDREN

Children evolving through Family Harmony

Children’s development stages

ANGER Management

The Parents Role

The Parents Relationship

Parents as Mentors

When Family Relationships Aren’t Working

Healing the Parent Relationship

The Initial Family Meeting

Conducting the Meeting

Explain and Discuss

HARMONY – Discussion and Experience

For the Children

INSPIRED by NATURES DIVERSITY & HARMONY

Chapter 21: WHAT ABOUT OUR WORKING LIVES?

Chapter 22: BEING SUCCESSFUL

Chapter 23: HARMONIOUS LIVING - The End Result

Building RELATIONSHIPS – an Overview

Chapter 24: BEING a WORLD CITIZEN

HOW CAN WE POSITIVELY IMPROVE OUR WORLD?

WORLD PEACE and HARMONY

Chapter 25: WHAT ABOUT GOD AND RELIGION

Chapter 26: PROMOTING HARMONY in our Home, Workplace, Community, World

Chapter 27: BOOK SUMMARY

APPENDICES

ADDENDUM

LIFE ENGINEERS

OUR LIFE - an Overview

Living in HARMONY

HEALTH & WELL-BEING

INTUITION; MIND; BODY (operating Harmoniously)

Handling FEAR, Worry & Stress!

DEVELOPING an UNLIMITED LIFE of HARMONY

About the Author

"In the overall scheme of things I am not very important.

It’s my equality; extended family focus; and discerned collaborative contributing conscious evolution that counts."

PRELUDE

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A worldwide family & community initiative

A LIFE ‘ROAD MAP’

When we travel through unfamiliar country, we sensibly use a guide or road map to avoid becoming lost.

Yet when we travel our infinitely more challenging Life journey of continual exploration, discovery and evolution, we start with no ‘road map’ - often ignoring our guiding intuition.

As children, we are reliant on our parents and community to provide us with proven wise guidance, when they themselves often lack the Life Education needed to successfully mentor us.

So we become ‘lost’ to some extent - confused and / or frightened by the unknown – we develop resistance to change.

We can begin to develop insecurities – losing confidence in ourselves and our place in the world - limiting our lives to repeating patterns of living and behaviour that we feel are ‘safe’ – observing rather than exploring.

We can become self-absorbed and reliant on being entertained, addictions and association with ‘groups’ – rather than self-reliant and discerned personal exploration and experience.

Our life can become focused on survival and going through the motions of ‘living under the circumstances’ rather than ‘creating the circumstances’.

This guide is a life ‘road map’ – aimed at helping us discover/rediscover how, what and who we truly are – our personal attributes (+ve and -ve) – the importance of relationships (treating others as we would like to be treated) and taking full responsibility for ourselves - our intuitive, inquisitive, joyful, ever evolving self, working harmoniously internally and with all others as equals - being how we were at birth, but now with ever expanding life wisdom and discernment – enjoying all life has to offer.

It then provides guidance so we can confidently discern, explore, appreciate and embrace the diversity and opportunities available to us each day in our world of infinite possibilities – loving ‘being the best we can realistically be’ – welcoming and learning from each ‘bump’ in our life journey.

QUESTIONS to ask ourselves

Where are children to learn and evolve during their most receptive time of life if not via the love, support, education and role models provided by their parents, family and mentors – experiencing the joy of Harmony (equality; unity; contribution; collaboration)?

Where are we to get our ‘finishing school’ education in becoming practical, wise parents and elders if not by significantly contributing to the evolution of our family, community and ourselves?

Where are we to obtain true joy in our lives, if not through every day being blessed with seeing the ongoing evolution of children unfold before our eyes - and seeing our children, our mentees, our partners and ourselves understand and accept; appreciate; improve and positively evolve through ever developing quality relationships and embracing our life lessons and infinite possibilities?

How do we bring consistent harmony and joy into our daily lives without life experience, collaboration and exploring ideas, knowledge and intuitive insights that we understand, value and that motivate us to embrace with determination, effort and contribution?

Do we see life as wondrous – full of possibilities and opportunities to appreciate, explore, discern and experience – gaining on-going joy and wisdom we openly share and use in collaboration with everyone – confident in our intent and every growing evolution? Or are we limited to some extent by: lack of life education; materialism; self-focus; competition; conflict; stress; dogma / close mindedness; fear; negative and / or repetitive life patterns; and/or ignoring our intuition?

Are we open-minded and receptive toself-improvement? Do we have the Courage to change and the Desire and Dedication to become the best we can realistically be?

How can we accelerate our life journey from limited understanding of our self and life to wisdom and harmony?

A HEALTH and HARMONY ‘life Support Kit’

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This guide supplies proven and practical information whereby we can answer all these questions and many more for ourselves, in a way we can intuitively understand, accept and be motivated to make significant realistic improvements to our existing life – building upon our current life wisdom.

It can also be an excellent day to day ‘mentor’ – providing guidance and motivation in handling new experiences - improving our decision making etc.

We are born with a perfect 24/7 alarm and health maintenance system monitored by our mind and ego to alert us to any threat to our wellbeing – sending us an immediate warning (usually a feeling of fear) while our body provides us with a signal (pain) and initiates layers of healing. We are then able to make immediate decisions about the best actions to take.

Unfortunately, many people lack the understanding to fully appreciate and take advantage of these alerts. They don’t discern and initiate the necessary appropriate actions, and then return to living positively.

They respond negatively to the alerts, becoming emotional and stressed or even overcome with fear and unable to cope. This can cause or reinforce negative life patterns leading to possible mental health issues. This is particularly prevalent in today’s society characterised by little life education and excessive competition, materialism, drug use and stress.

This guide explains these and other key issues, combining to determine how, what and who we truly are and how we can become and remain the person we realistically wish to be - living in health and harmony individually as well as within our family and community – taking fully responsibility for all our decisions, outcomes and improvements throughout our life.

All issues discussed are practical and proven. They are intended to be easy to understand and easy to relate to. This ‘support kit’ includes alternative ways for us to develop and maintain both health and harmony.

Finally, this guide is meaningless words unless the reader provides:

Open mindedness and sole Responsibility for their life.

Patience in Understanding and Discerning how it applies to them

Positive Intent, Determination and Effort to become the best contributing person / parent / child / spouse / citizen they can realistically be.

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May EACH DAY be one of EVER EVOLVING:

Consciousness, Acceptance and Appreciation

Enthusiastic Life Exploration

Integrity, Discernment and Intuitive Guidance

Equality, Respect and Collaborative Contribution

Self and Life Wisdom assisted by Mentors in gaining Body-Ego-Mind-Intuition BALANCE

Genuine Relationships with our self and all others

HARMONY with Self, Family and Community

Acknowledgements and Dedications

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This guide is dedicated to the many wonderful mentors who have inspired my life with their wisdom, guidance and shared experiences. Your wisdom and love educated this uninformed, rebellious child. You all contributed to what is contained in this guide. It allows me to pass on to others as a non-profit initiative what you so generously gave to me.

After my father died when I was 11, Peter Couchman became my first true mentor at a time I was confused and vulnerable. His wisdom and life example as a mere 17 year old school prefect led to his setting the standard for integrity in current affairs reporting in later life. This guide reflects his central influence on my life.

As a teenager, my headmaster at Kedron High School, Alan Anderson’s faith and support gave me confidence as a person at a vital time in my life.

BHP of the 1960s, and it’s inspirational, mentoring CEO Sir Ian McLennan deserve special thanks for providing me with the most comprehensive education, support and experience that enabled me to gain the foundation knowledge upon which much of this guide was built.

I wish to also make special mention of the many ‘diggers’ (returned Australian and New Zealand soldiers) who opened my mind to positive living when I was thirteen years of age. It is particularly appropriate that we recently honoured the 100 year anniversary of the ANZAC Gallipoli landing – lest we forget their kindness, wisdom and sacrifice.

Dr Ken Collins was a wonderful family doctor and even better friend and mentor. I learned so much from his example as a kind, discerning, dedicated, humble, wise and harmonious contributing world citizen.

My granddaughter Kahlira also turns twelve this year. She was born and remains a bundle of positivity with endless inquisitiveness and enthusiasm.

This guide was initially written to give her something meaningful throughout her life. Suggestions about making it available to everyone through the internet have made it a much longer, more complete task with input from many people around the world, especially the invaluable contribution of Faeghe Evans, Mehnoosh Loh and Marty Laing - expanding my life view through your life example of collaborative harmony - thank you.

I wish to thank my direct and extended family for their support through the tough times, especially my greatest friend and wife Kathy whose love and wisdom has enabled me to focus on becoming the person I wanted to be.

To my constant and loyal companion Karma and all my other animal and bird friends who inspire me every day - may people everywhere learn to treasure the gift you give us by just being in, and bringing joy into our lives – reminding us to simply appreciate every moment.

Finally, to people everywhere who are taking responsibility for, and positively impacting their own lives and the world generally, may all your aspirations be rewarded with confidence to keep expanding your lives and happiness at all times no matter the circumstances.

SPECIAL NOTE

(I also include these at the end of some chapters for further clarity)

In my career, I believe my most important task was being an educative mentor in guiding people towards reaching their true potential in the work place and as contributing people.

So it is with this guide – the quality of the content is vital, yet the reader must be able to easily understand what is written and even more importantly, see how each point can practically and realistically aid their overall joy and progress in life.

The first 16 chapters are focused on gradually developing our overall wisdom of who we truly are, and how our physical, mental and intuitive selves can cooperate, leading us to an incredible potential future.

Chapters 17 and 18 are then devoted to bringing realistic day to day harmony and joy into our lives.

The remaining chapters then cover what our future life should be like, and other issues relevant to that potential unlimited life. Chapter 25 builds upon previous chapters with why and how to implement Family Harmony.

Chapter 1 outlines my overall intent in writing this guide. This hopefully better prepares you for chapter 2, which outlines all the key points covered in chapters 3 to 16. The better your understanding of chapter 2, the more you’ll gain from each subsequent chapter.

The included photos show my favourite meditation spots on our property.

CHAPTER ONE

INTRODUCTION

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Staying ON TOP OF THE WORLD

instead of Under the Circumstances.

What the World needs now is HARMONY!

Living on a rural property, I wake up to the sound of kookaburras announcing the sunrise and then the magpies serenading me with their wonderful chortle.

‘Welcome each morning with the inspirational call of the Kookaburra

LIVE each day with the love and joy of the magpies song in our heart.’

This is a great way to start each day feeling on top of the world. Refer to Appendix IV – Staying ‘ON TOP OF THE WORLD’.

At other times life interferes with an unpleasant experience that causes an attendant feeling of negativity. We then start to feel under the circumstances.

My working life was about working with organisations to overcome their Under the Circumstances and get back On Top of the World. Given that organisations are really only their personnel; this was then really about getting the individuals working as an effective, happy team – working in harmony.

Then when I contracted chronic fatigue syndrome which laid me low for several years, I had to expand what I’d learned to my own situation and rebuild my life.

So this guide is what (with the help of many mentors, friends, colleagues, client staff, family and doctors) I learned, applied and improved over many years.

Everything written has been experienced, lived and proven to be self-evidently beneficial to my life, and reflects what and who I have been as well as who I am now. However, they are my perceptions - to be balanced against your own.

I believe it is entirely practical and can be of assistance to anyone with an open mind. It’s about getting understanding of Self and Life WISDOM (that are rarely taught) so we can live more of our lives On Top of the World instead of Under the Circumstances. Hopefully it can help accelerate your life education in becoming the consistently confident, joyful person you would choose to be – understanding and gradually gaining self-wisdom and taking charge of the unlimited life available to us all.

Read what is written - visualise how it could apply and benefit your life - take a note of those that do, perhaps including a brief summary of your visualisation for later review and prioritisation.

However, it contains facts that address the most personal subject we know (ourselves) and therefore there will be some issues we feel uncomfortable with. These feelings are positive questions our minds are asking for clarification on - so continue reading on and be discerning about all questions raised. But we need to firstly put aside our egos or this guide will cause upset, not provide another positive view of how to make the most of our lives.

At the end of appropriate chapters, I added a ‘Review’ section. This is an extra for those who wish to make the most of this opportunity – to hopefully assist in their understanding, acceptance and making use of the information in that chapter. Additionally, I add a Special Note where some additional clarity regarding that chapter and its overall contribution may aid your understanding.

What the world needs now is HARMONY

While my childhood lacked life education and harmony, this actually made me doubly aware and appreciative of the education and professional experience I received from BHP and IBM.

Of particular importance was the culture of unity and harmony through working cooperatively as a team. Senior executives and managers were educative mentors, not ‘managers’ giving orders. This undoubtedly was a central influence on my career in IT; management consulting; and mentoring where my focus and track record were primarily associated with bringing harmony into the work place – whether through improved computer and support systems and/or by improving the culture of an organisation.

My initial task was to ensure all staff understood and believed that what we were planning to do would significantly improve life for them individually and collectively. Otherwise, it could never be made to realistically work.

Secondly, they needed to understand there would need to be an intensive effort of mentoring and re-education. They could then actively and productively participate as equal team members in bringing about the improvements. This was largely about what I now call ‘Self-Evident Learning’.

The implementation focus was on cooperative collaborative unity and harmony at all times – freely exchanging creative ideas and experience.

The degree of improvement in just a few months was often amazing because:

What they were doing involved intuitive, real world common sense

They were beginning to feel like respected, valued members of an excellent team that was far more productive and enjoyable than they had ever thought possible

They learned new communication and relationship skills and life education that not only improved their work place, but often led to better harmony personally and for their family.

My past 25 years have seen me focus on my own inner harmony and then the harmony of my family, extended family and community.

The steps were very similar, although the personal steps were more difficult because our home and personal environments have less structure and discipline.

Then writing this guide made me even more aware of:

How important harmony is for our world

It is quite easy to achieve if we advance our thinking to what’s best for us all, not our individual materialistic self

How I needed to take responsibility for doing my best in presenting this knowledge to people everywhere.

SELF-EVIDENT LEARNING and HARMONIOUS LIVING - Explanation

If there was only one thing in our society I could change, it would be our education system.

We spend the 12+ most receptive years of our life being mostly taught subjects that will have little effect on our daily lives, while learning little about life itself, what and who we are, and how to gain practical wisdom so we can make ever evolving choices in becoming a positive, happy person – being the best we can be - recognising and embracing the limitless opportunities available to us - where we positively contribute as an equal member of our family, work place, community and world.

Information gained from each life experience has little real value until we understand, accept, take responsibility for and are able to utilise it (where beneficial) or reject it (where detrimental). We therefore need our mind and intuition co-operating in analysing this information according to how well it potentially matches our present and/or likely future life requirements.

This is what self-evident learning is about – being discerning and intuitive in gaining wisdom that gives us our best chance to be the best we can be.

We then have a much greater opportunity to live harmoniously with everyone, especially ourselves.

This guide explains how vital both of these heading points are - how we can practically and realistically overcome our lack of life education, especially the importance of understanding and fully embracing our intuition.

This book is a LIFE EDUCATION guide focused on each of the following:

Learning to understand HOW & WHAT WE ARE and how to maintain excellent overall HEALTH.

Learning to understand and accept WHO WE ARE NOW and our incredible POTENTIAL FUTURE by fully utilising our INTUITION and the wisdom we have learned through our life.

Understanding and Optimising our Personal ATTRIBUTES, especially ATTITUDE; TRUTH and DISCERNMENT; EQUALITY;RESPECT; UNITY; BALANCE; HARMONY.

Recognising and Utilising Life’s OPPORTUNITIES.

Embracing quality RELATIONSHIPS throughout our life.

Being SUCCESSFUL - making a positive CONTRIBUTION and gaining increased WISDOM every day of our lives.

Being TRUSTED and LOVED by our family and friends.

Being a wonderful FAMILY, COMMUNITY and WORLD Citizen, constantly gaining and sharing wisdom.

Refer to ADDENDUM – ‘9 Steps to gaining Wisdom from new Information’.

The OBJECTIVES of this Guide

PROVIDING KNOWLEDGE that is:

Proven and meaningful to the reader so they can easily comprehend how it can positively expand their lives

Presented in a manner that allows them free will to use as they see fit, being mentored not lectured to.

LEADING US TOWARDS BEING THE BEST WE CAN REALISTICALLY

BE EACH DAY OF OUR LIVES.

We will then have a wonderful life – respecting ourselves and respected by others for being the best we can be - focused on Discerning Consciousness and equality, collaborative unity, justice and positive contribution while gradually realising our full potential.

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