Your Name: How to Build and Repair Your Reputation

By Mike Siver

Your Actions + What Others Say About You = Your Name (Reputation)

This simple formula is the most powerful leverage you have in life. While people tell you not to be concerned about what others think, that advice only goes so far. Today, we have to worry about how we present ourselves, both in person and on social media. Being sure your actions and words represent your good reputation can help you in all facets of your life.

There is something appealing about someone who whose actions are consistently in line with their beliefs. When people know that you are a person of integrity who stands by your word, they will back you up, no matter what. Politics and popularity come and go, but men and women of principle remain.

If your reputation is not what you’d like it to be, the ideas and concepts presented in Your Name will help you to repair past damage and build a new, powerful reputation for yourself.

A good name is to be more desired than great wealth, Favor is better than silver and gold. —Proverbs 22:1

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mike Siver
• Release date: Mar 5, 2019

Mike Siver

Mike is a Master Addiction Counselor, Certified Domes-tic Violence Counselor and a Board Certified Biblical Counselor. He provides Anger Management, Domestic Violence, Substance Abuse counseling and assessments for Van Buren County and Blue Seahorse. Inc., a non-profit (501c3) community-based organization.He works with Van Buren County Family Services for placement of mothers and children from family of domestic violence situations and is a Chaplain for Forgotten Man Ministries.Mike’s purpose is to target the young but address issues we find ourselves in at any age. The uniqueness of his writings generates pointed conversation. Not only is each saying enough to be thought-provoking but people hear, see and feel them every day.To make the topic more interesting for all, Mike has expanded on the topic to generate discussion about that topic. The quotes/sayings and expanded sections open the topic for serious discussion. This is accomplished by giving the quotes/sayings a twist that tends to make what is written personal. By making the quotes/sayings personal in a nonthreatening environment people tend not to become defensive and may enter into the conversation. Mike does not offer “the” answer but an opinion for discussion.His book, like his column, is directed to the general public and or anyone who feels a need to address themselves and or those around them. Mike uses the book in groups for discussion on behaviors and attitudes. It would be effective in youth groups i.e. Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, church youth groups, rehab facilities and groups to address beliefs and behaviors. It would be effective for young families to address issues.

Book preview

Your Name

How to Build and Repair Your Reputation

MIKE SIVER,

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Smashwords ebook published by Fideli Publishing Inc.

© Copyright 2019, Mike Siver

All Rights Reserved.

No part of this eBook may be reproduced or shared by any electronic or mechanical means, including but not limited to printing, file sharing, and email, without prior written permission from Fideli Publishing.

Smashwords License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Foreword

Introduction

Author’s Note

Your Name and Its Value

Your Name and Life Skills

Your Name, Children and Youths

Your Name and the Middle Teen Years

Your Name and Puberty

Your Name and the High School Years

Your Name and Bullies

Your Name and Racism

Your Name and Teenage Years

Your Name and the College Years

Your Name and Being an Adult

Your Name and Joining the Workforce

Your Name and Adult Relationships

Your Name and Adult Dating

Your Name and Marriage

Your Name and Becoming a Parent

Your Name: Mommy or Daddy

Your Name and Growing Older

Your Name and Being a Grandparent

Your Name and the Public Media

Foreword

The basic requirement for taking care of, or making excellent anything, is to value it. It’s the difference between the dirty car given to the privileged kid or the spotless one that was earned by the kid next door.

It’s a fundamental element in an individual’s or group’s success. Every football team, every branch of the service, every good family starts by instilling pride in the fundamental element of your existence, who you are.

I recall just how well this was done in my case when at 18 years old, being home on leave before going to Vietnam. One of my parent’s friends asked in which branch of the military I was serving. I remember answering with almost an apologetic tone, the Marines. Oh, I wasn’t ashamed, no I didn’t want to rub it in because there were lots of folks that weren’t Marines and I didn’t want to brag and hurt their feelings. I believed just uttering Marine would stimulate all kinds of powerful images in anyone that heard it. It was now me. In addition to my last name, I was now also a Marine. I knew when people heard that word, now a part of my name, it would mean things: powerful things, good things.

Mike Siver is on to something in his book. The one thing we all have that we give to the world, even if we’re not on a football team or in the military, is our name. Most people don’t have that second thing with which to identify, from which to borrow pride, all they have is their name.

I wasn’t 13 when I ran away from home to the circus, I was 18, and it was the Marines. Completely anonymous to my drill instructors, I realized I was given a great gift. I could make my name mean whatever I wanted, and I wanted it to be unique. I worked hard earning three meritorious promotions and after two years, was offered the rank of Staff Sergeant, E-6, at just 20 years old. Rare in the Corps.

I had left home, that while good in many ways, was turbulent in many more. My father was a recovering alcoholic who in years leading up to my departure had been a difficult personality that had brought us a lot of instability. He was not, I suspected, particularly fond of me having shown up unexpectedly when he was 45 years old. Everything I knew about life, everything I knew and felt about me, I had learned in that dysfunctional home in which I had grown up. I wasn’t fond of where I was and who I was, and I only wanted to get away. I feared who I was had been established in that home with all its trauma and stress, that the die had been cast and it would follow me forever. Not true.

What I learned quickly in Marine boot camp was that I wasn’t tied to anyone or any past. I was just me, my name was Dick Overton, and if I wanted people to think well of me, I could make that happen. All I had to do was earn it. But first, I had to decide. I had to determine that it was important to me what people thought when they heard my name. That was my start, my cornerstone. No one in this new world knew anything about me, so I could determine what they thought of me when they heard my name.

After reading Mike’s book, I quickly recalled the number of times I had used this your name principle in my career. Almost without realizing it I had often mentored work associates and young people by making them care what people thought of them when they heard their name. It was a simple idea, but one with which everyone could identify. Everyone has a name. Convincing anyone how valuable that is, and just how much power they have to control the life attached to that name is a gift. It’s one of the best things you can do for a person.

I left home confused, angry and not happy with who I thought I was, but that all changed quickly. By the time I graduated from Marine boot camp, I had earned one of five meritorious promotions to PFC, private first class that were awarded among approximately sixty plus recruits. Before he left to take up his next platoon one of our drill instructors took me aside and said something to me that to this day, brings a lump to my throat. This was a Marine’s Marine. An infantry Marine with a tour in Vietnam under his belt where he earned among other awards a Purple Heart. This was a guy we all respect. Overton, he began, I’ve watched you here, and I just want you to know, if I were in a bad spot I’d be glad to have you with me.

It was true. My name was mine and whatever people thought when they heard it was up to me. It wasn’t determined by anything in my past or an environment I came from, good or bad. It was up to me.

This book has a powerful message for any person, young or old, struggling to build a future disconnected from their past. It talks about the one thing we own, that is ours to build on and make what we want of it, no matter what we have done, or from where we come. It’s our name.

Within the pages of this book, are the lessons and examples of how to take care of that name. Your name should be so important to you, and you should treasure it. It’s a gift that belongs to no one else.

Treasure you name so much that you almost apologize when you say it to people because they don’t have your name. It’s yours. Don’t let anything happen to it.

Richard Overton

Introduction

Our roles in life change with time and circumstances. However, we don’t always have control over our roles or situations, but we do have control and can make choices on how we play these roles. To keep control of the value of your name, it is important to ask yourself: Why Did I Do That? and What Role Do I Play?

Mike is practical and down to earth person who can explain complex problems that affect many people throughout their lives. He keeps the issues real and simple to understand, to better equip people with the tools that they need to change. All his books so far have been of great use and helped many people around the world. It is a pleasure to know