Desperately Seeking Self Second Edition

By Viola Fodor

This newly updated and expanded edition of Desperately Seeking Self; Second Edition offers a unique, spiritually-centered approach that emphasizes the how of healing from an eating disorder. It guides readers on a journey inward, showing them how to connect with their true self and from there, heal their eating disorder and transforms their lives.

How do you look within when an eating disorder has filled you up with pain? Desperately Seeking Self; Second Edition speaks directly to this need. Its message is simple, gentle and accessible, resonating especially with a new generation of millennial readers who are hungry for meaningful spiritual connections.

This updated edition preserves its “conversational” approach and composite client profile (a woman with bulimia). To frame the ongoing significance of the book today, this conversation answers such basic human questions as: Why do I have this illness? Who am I to think that I deserve better? How will my life be different when I awaken to a deeper level? What exactly is a transformation?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Gurze Books
• Release date: Jul 9, 2019
• ISBN: 9781684423156

Viola Fodor

Viola Fodor is a Canadian psychotherpist and educator with 15 years of experience. She is a frequent speaker about eating disorders and wellness at several universities, high schools, family support groups, private companies, EAPs, and the Canadian Mental Health Association. In 1991, her work was featured on CBC’s national show "Man Alive" and she has been the author and subject of many articles in numerous Canadian newspapers, including the Toronto Star. A graduate of the University of Alberta, Edmonton with a Masters in Education in Educational Psychology, she lives in Campbellville, Ontario, a retreat like setting west of Toronto, with two cats and a dog.

Book preview

INTRODUCTION

I first stumbled upon Desperately Seeking Self in 1997 shortly after its initial publication which was not long after I had opened, Monte Nido, the first eating disorder residential treatment center in the U.S. I was an avid reader of every new eating disorder book that came out and I had already written two of my books, The Eating Disorder Sourcebook and Your Dieting Daughter. I knew instantly that Viola Fodor had written an important piece of work and one that so simply and beautifully stated a message I myself was trying to impart to all clients, both in my private practice and my treatment center; You are your greatest resource, you need to connect with your true core self, for it is that part of you that has the wisdom to heal your eating disorder self.

At first this sounds like a cliché, it sounds too simple, it sounds like it’s coming from someone who does not understand the seriousness of an eating disorder. But, like Viola, I do understand what is necessary to heal an eating disorder, from my own recovery, and from my now 40 years of experience treating others. The truth is that when you delve down into what connecting with your core self really means, you will discover a deep and ancient fundamental concept of healing that has now found its way into mainstream circles, modern medicine, and treatment programs. You will find it expressed, described, and delineated in many different ways, but all come down to some form of mindfulness practice, or what Viola simply calls Quiet Time. Various, well-known and researched treatment philosophies such as Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, currently being promoted, have their roots in mindfulness.

What Viola teaches readers to do in Desperately Seeking Self, is mindfulness meditation in its simplest form. I suspect Viola chose to use the term Quiet Time to describe the process since the word meditation brings up religious connotations and images of monks sitting for hours in solitude. Quiet Time or meditation is simply a way to sit back and get in touch with your own wise essence, your witnessing presence, allowing you to avoid getting overwhelmed by your thoughts, feelings, or circumstances. This is a skill that when developed allows you to separate yourself from your thoughts and feelings, letting them come and go. It allows you to develop an appropriate sensitivity to your body’s true signals and teaches you how to sit with pain, learning how to respond rather than react in self-destructive ways such as eating disorder behaviors.

Desperately Seeking Self is a guidebook that teaches readers how to go on an inward journey, to connect with their true self, which will help lead them to transformation and healing. In my own philosophical approach described in my book and workbook, 8 Keys To Recovery From An Eating Disorder, I teach that every client who comes to see me has what I call a healthy core soul self and an eating disorder self that developed over time and has taken control. If an eating disorder has been ruling someone’s life for a long time, they might have lost connection to their essence or core self. They end up thinking their Eating Disorder Self is "who they