The Vicar
()
About this ebook
I was enjoying a pint when I noticed him alone in a booth, eating fish and chips. He looked familiar which was interesting since I had never been to this part of London before. Then it struck me like lightning. This was Vicar Stone from the Vicarage in Blackpool up the coast from where I live. When this grease ball sat down at the bar and began ogling my vicar, I sprang into action.
J.T. Evergreen
OCCUPATION - Retired from the grind. Reflecting on successes, failures, and regrets. Exploring new aspects of self, writing that book which will get me an Oscar, staying out of trouble - well, small amounts of trouble are ok. Bringing joy into people's lives with random acts of kindness - the ones who aren't expecting it are the best. Cheering up check-out clerks at WalMart.ABOUT ME - Alone in blessed singleness. Wicked sense of humor, enjoy my own company, glad I'm not young any longer. I do miss the intimacy of being in love. A good catch . . . at least I think so. Enjoy the possibilities of every moment, an imagination that won't quite, a master weaver - give away everything I make, excellent portrait painter, a national treasure - though no one agrees with me, a good listener, intuitive, a good conversationalist, avoid boredom and boring people at all costs - that's a career all by itself.INTERESTS - Intelligent conversation: hard to come by these days, metaphysics, mysticism, my pups - Charlie, Max, and Bailey, seeing the funny side of life, going to Macy's at Christmas time - kicking Santa and punching an Elf. If I had a singing voice, which I don't, I would sing all of the time, wherever I was - even in WalMart. Wouldn't that be enchanting? When I receive the Oscar for the book I'm writing, I will have some baritone sing On A Clear Day, and I will lip sync his voice. It will wow the audience.PUBLICATIONS – Short Stories to celebrate the NEW YEAR - 23 delightful short stories; Alone at the Beach 25 short stories to keep you company, Home Alone, 8 Great Stories to keep you company, Born in the Twilight, Injun Summer, This’nThat, Short Stories for a Summer’s Day. Holiday Short Stories, With All My Love, Father Frederick Monahan, Shangri la, Stepping Stones to God, I’m Gay Mother – Get Over it, The Olde Book Shoppe, Naked Before God, The Italian Call Boy, The Silence of Healing, Death of a Pope, The Best Short Stories Ever, and My Love Affair with Father Tomas McTavish, working on a new character, Father Gibbon with Sister Mary Magda in TheAdventure of Father Gibbon with Sister M. Magda - it's about murder. I get choked up when I re-read some of my sentimental stories. I’m told that’s a sign of being a good writer.LOVES - Color and lots of it, strawberry jam, hiking up Yosemite Falls, Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco, sourdough bread, only made in San Francisco. Hearst Castle, Big Sur, sea air, Adams peanut butter, chocolate milk, rainy days, canaries singing, chocolate chip cookies my mother made, Greek yogurt with honey - oh, yum. Laughter. I make it a point of doing this many times a day.HATES - Stupidity, insensitivity, bad table manners - come on, how difficult is it to hold a fork properly - it's not a shovel for God's sake. Snow, ice, slush, freeway traffic, lima beans - what was God thinking, sleepless nights, people who are late, texting - it's a cop-out, tobacco, alcohol, red meat,FAVORITE BOOKS - The Spiritual Journey of Joel S. Goldsmith, How to Win Friends and Influence People - I collect this book and give them to people I hate - there's a waiting list.FAVORITE MUSIC – Let's Talk Dirty to the Animals – Gilda Radner - funny lady;; Joplin’s Peachrine, Ahmad Jamal - Country Tour - the absolute best jazz - never tire of it. Someone Waits for You – Carly Simons, Helen Kane singing Button Up Your Overcoat and I Want to Be Bad – I relate to the lyrics. And the Tenor who sang Springtime for Hitler in the Zero Mostel version of The Producers. No one seems to know who he is. What a voice.FAVORITE FILMS – The Celluloid Closet, Witness for the Prosecution, It Could Happen to You, Maltese Falcon, Inherit the Wind, 12 Angry Men, Harold and Maude, Murder on the Orient Express, Hope and Glory, Sorry Wrong Number, Speed, Practical Magic, Apollo 13, Where the Red Fern Grows, The original Producers - touch me, hold me - Estelle was terrific, and Zero - what can I say.FAVORITE TV SHOWS - I don't watch TV any more, but when I did . . . 2-1/2 men - when it was good. Everybody loves Raymond - some great writers; best sight gagsFAVORITE QUOTES – The poetry in writing is the illusion it creates: by me. Lord Chesterfield: “Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable.” The saddest words of tongue or pen are these - It might have been - indeed they are. If you want to make a success out of old age, you better start now: my mother when I was 15. On a clear day, you really can see forever - you just have to look. I may be rancid butter, but I'm on your side of the bread. Inherit the Wind.FAMILY – A father who was emotionally absent, a mother who provided all the necessities of life and nothing more. An older brother who is a classic socio-psychopath and made my childhood a misery. I hide from everything just to survive. My right of passage came when I was 18 and joined the Naval Air Reserves. In boot camp I hide in the back row the first day, and guess whose name they called to be the Company Commander – me. But it was the best thing that could have happened and I bless that moment. I had to lead those 50 plus men and boys for 90 days. The night of graduation we drilled in front of the audience and it was perfect. The guys carried me from the hangar in triumph. I came out of the shadows that summer and never went back. I'm a louse when it comes to cleaning house, too many other more enjoyable things to do.“The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor WitShall lure it back to cancel half a Line,Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.”Omar Khayyam
Read more from J.T. Evergreen
The Crystal Ball Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIt Came Upon A Midnight Clear Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Conversation With God Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRain Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Mr. Sandman Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Arrest Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFather Mario And Dane Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSuspicion Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Gigolo Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Magic Fairy Tale Book Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMichelangelo And David The Untold Love Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTutti-Frutti Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Amphora Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Bells Of Saint Peter Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDeath of a Pope Birth of Hope Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBlue Moon Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Elevator Ride Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLove Just Another Four Letter Word Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Barista Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings5135 Kensington Avenue Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsForgiveness Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Voyage of Father Gibbons with Sister M. Magda Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCatlin And The Magic Fairy Tale Book Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Accident Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTwelve Days of Christmas: sort of Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBlind Date Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Flying Carpet Named Jack Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShe's Dying Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCookies Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWrong Number Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to The Vicar
Related ebooks
The Forgotten Ones Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Demon Hunters Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Christmas Miracle Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSlap! A Love Story Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Angel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWith This Ring I Thee Wed Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMPREG Love - Steamy MM Cowboy Romance Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Following My Toes Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5To Seduce a Scallywag Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTaking it on Faith Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsAlien: Contact: An Alien First Contact Romance Collection Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOne Night Stand Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5One Night Stand Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Last Casualty of the Great War: A Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Bottle Ghosts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Elevator Priest Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCort—Unbreakable: Man Up, #4 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHeat Wave Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Brute's Strength Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Winter's Regret Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWild And Free: Wilder Brothers, #1 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Beach Wedding Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShow Me The Way Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsVespertilio Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe One Who Almost Got Away Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThread of Danger: The Joe Tyler Series, #7 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Royal Proposal Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsStrangelet, Volume 2, Issue 4 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsForbidden Temptation: Forbidden Love, #2 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFace Value: Is Who You See, Really Who You Get? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Gay Fiction For You
Young Mungo Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Priory of the Orange Tree Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Exquisite Corpse Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Pomegranate: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Him: Him, #1 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Cabin at the End of the World: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5City of Night Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ghost Wall: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Farrell Covington and the Limits of Style: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Marvellous Light Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Orlando: A Biography Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5A Boy's Own Story: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Zombie: A Novel Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Maurice Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Faggots Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5We the Animals Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Kiss Her Once for Me: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Misadventures of Doc and Dirk, Volume I Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Coming Out: 14 Erotica Closet Gay Bundle Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Lie With Me: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The House of Impossible Beauties: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5And Then He Sang a Lullaby Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Querelle of Roberval Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Jonny Appleseed Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Persian Boy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5White Trash Warlock Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5We Are Water: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5100 Boyfriends Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Charioteer: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Silver in the Wood Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Related categories
Reviews for The Vicar
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
The Vicar - J.T. Evergreen
The Vicar
Copyright 2019 J.T. Evergreen
Published by J.T. Evergreen
at Smashwords
This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Acknowledgements
Many thanks to Khris Lawrentz for his tireless proofreading.
The Vicar
As told by Harper MacFarlane
I was visiting London for several days of business with a few hours thrown in for some pleasure. At the moment, I was enjoying the pleasure I so richly deserved, having arrived at the Halfway to Heaven Pub about three in the afternoon. I was enjoying a pint when I noticed someone sitting alone in a booth, eating fish and chips. He looked vaguely familiar which was interesting since I had never been to this part of London before.
I guessed he