Understanding Dutch Culture Through American Eyes

By William Drake

Population density and the small size of the country have made rules of social interaction important and a certain amount of intrusive regulation necessary. The Dutch people feel that an individual’s privacy, personal and physical, should be respected at all costs. Rules of etiquette, politeness to others, and many formal and informal regulations are designed to ensure privacy and respect for the individual.

It is important for Americans to recognize the influence of this core Dutch cultural value upon our own culture. Many of the original American settlers were from the Netherlands, and with their dedication to personal liberty and freedom they helped shape the American core culture. So while some Dutch rules and regulations, and some of the petty bureaucratic processes one encounters everywhere, may be perceived by Americans as being excessively restrictive, confining, and interfering, the Dutch value a smoothly running, well-organized social system as much as they value privacy and liberty, and they realize that in order to achieve that balance, individuals must when necessary sacrifice a personal preference in favor of group considerations.

One of the central aspects of the Dutch approach to life is incorporated in the word ‘gezellig’. The state of ‘gezelligheid’ is a comfortable, pleasant, no-stress interlude in the day’s activities like the family who, at twilight, rather than turning on the house lights will put a few candles around the living room and all gather to look quietly out at their garden. It can also be seen in a mother at a playground who calls gently “keep your play gezellig” as the children’s play becomes too rowdy. The most valued mood in a Brown Café is gezellig, and there is even a Dutch beer advertised as “guaranteed gezellig”. (If you are familiar with Thai culture 'gezellig' is a lot like 'sanook'.)

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: William Drake
• Release date: Dec 30, 2018

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The Dutch People As I Know Them

If I were asked to describe the Dutch people who my wife and I worked with and lived among for more than two years, I would say that the Dutch I knew in business and as friends are, without many exceptions:

People who care more about benefits than earnings

People who value the family more than the company

People who find cooperation with colleagues & supervisors more important than advancement or the admiration of others

People for whom job freedom counts more than success

People who rate attractive physical conditions higher than efficiency in the organization

People who are not preoccupied with employment security

People for whom family and personal life factors are far more important than work factors

People for whom the small fortune of the many is to be preferred to the great fortune of the few

There are many good reasons why American companies form close partnerships, alliances, and other forms of relationships with Dutch companies. Among the most commonly given are:

Name the language, the Dutch speak it

They’ve been around the world a long time

They know their neighbors and how to deal with them

Their neighbors know and respect them

They are tough, honest, and loyal

They wrote the book(s) on culture and business

Tolerance is a core social policy strategy and is widely practiced by individuals

The Dutch are pragmatic, intellectual, and creative

Most Dutch genuinely like (most) Americans

The Dutch see American cultural/business strengths as complementary to their own

On a personal level, some of the characteristics which I believe distinguish many, if not most Dutch people from people from other European cultures are:

They have a commitment to experiencing maximum possible quality of life

They have a strong sense of collegiality in business

They exhibit a natural, cautious friendliness

They maintain active bonds with family and friends

They honor and celebrate life cycle events

They have respect for differences in beliefs, lifestyles, and values

They are passionate about sunshine and flowers

They value both private property and public spaces

They are equally comfortable in a Mercedes or on a bicycle

They prefer food, fun, and companionship to just about anything else

For an American considering The Netherlands as a place to live short or long-term

The Dutch are a cosmopolitan people, accustomed to foreigners moving in among them

They have a world-class medical system that is easily accessible by registered expatriates

This is a highly civilized society, ruled by law

Almost everyone speaks English

You will be living among people who know how to survive every kind of storm

There is plenty of affordable (not cheap) real estate, especially in the smaller cities like Utrecht

The Dutch live an active, outdoor lifestyle

If you love flowers and very small dining utensils, you’re in

The rest of Europe is easily accessible by great rail and low-cost air

Taxes are high, but expatriate residents can quality for significant breaks

For those who care, the hashish supply is excellent and reasonably priced

Point Of View

Ever since Theo Van Gogh was killed in 2004 by a Muslim, the renowned Dutch tolerance has receded substantially. Particularly towards Muslims. It's sad to see, but from what I've seen on the news, it is happening everywhere, U.S., UK, France. Anonymous (at) www.talesmag.com

Similarities & Differences

American coming to The Netherlands for the first time are almost always impressed with the friendliness of the Dutch people. They often say that they have appreciated the warm hospitality, friendly and helpful people they encountered during their visit, and being able to speak English everywhere. It has felt so much like home.

There are indeed many similarities between The Netherlands and the United States. Everyday activities are not very different, and for the most part life is certainly not difficult. Procedures for shopping, taking public transportation, and leisure-time activities are much the same as those in other European countries, and similar to those in the United States, although there is a distinct absence of what Americans like to call the service mentality or client-centered treatment.

Anyone who is fortunate enough to live in The Netherlands and who takes the time, interest and effort to ask questions and observe the way of life and the people finds, however, that many apparent similarities are superficial. To assume that everything in The Netherlands is the same as things you are familiar with, and therefore to not look more deeply into the culture, people and way of life to find differences can limit the very real benefits that are possible from your experience.

Many activities and social organizations are available to help you penetrate beneath the surface, but it requires time, effort and persistence to make or maintain contacts with Dutch people rather than with other foreign residents in The Netherlands. When you encounter those differences that are confusing and unexpected, don’t let them upset you - remember that you are in a completely different if superficially similar culture, and try to understand the reasons for the differences that come from your own American ways as well as the Dutch peculiarities that are bugging you.

Point Of View

This is generally a good place to live and work. For people thinking of going overseas for the first time, I suspect this is a pretty easy posting: people speak English, and the culture is different from what you are used to, but not excessively so. I love the multi-cultural aspect of living here, I love being able to ride my bike to work and walk to the grocery store. I love being near all of the interesting places and things in Europe. I hate the total lack of service ingrained in the culture, which manifests itself in everything from lousy service in restaurants, to unresponsive landlords, to ineffectual government agencies, and to poor healthcare. Frankly, I'm not too fond of the weather, but, like anywhere else, there's good and bad. What you get out of it depends on your own attitude. Jim Warren (at) www.talesmag.com

Friendship In The Netherlands

Americans may perceive the surface friendliness, politeness and helpfulness toward visitors as an indication of friendship, and assume that the Dutch people have many friends and are going to be easy to befriend. In fact, Dutch people do enjoy and cultivate friendships, and there are few things more important to a Dutch person than their friends, but Dutch friendships develop slowly and there’s no rush about it. Friendships tend to develop among people who met in school, or who have similar political or religious beliefs. Dutch friendships tend to be more deeply-rooted, more broadly-based and longer-lasting than many of the friendships which Americans normally establish. The Dutch have few vrienden (friends), but many kennissen (acquaintances). A true friend is cherished. When a Dutch person introduces someone as a friend, it means something very special. Some signs that a friendship is developing are invitations to celebrate a birthday or a Sinterklaas (St. Nicholas) party with a Dutch family. Just keep in mind that even another Dutch person must know many Dutch people for longer than two years before a friendship between them can really begin.

Expectations regarding reciprocity