Let's Talk About Sex

By Pastor David

“What Does God Think of My Sex Life?”

Do you ever wonder? If so, you’re not alone. Teens and young adults alike have been asking that question for centuries. Finally, there is a good answer!
Pastor David dares to address the questions that many people would rather sweep under the rug and those that are not expected from a Preacher’s pulpit, or considered too sensitive to be discussed in the open. He does so by sharing what God has to say in His Word. You may be surprised to know that God is not silent on the matter of sex, and He has some positive things to show you as you seek His answers.

Have you ever wondered how you can know if you are really “in love”? What does God think about issues such as dating, birth control, co-habitation, oral sex, abortion, STDs, same-sex marriage, or virginity? Does the Bible really address those issues?

Yes, it does! Pastor David will reveal to you the un-silenced truth from God’s Word, as well as stories from teens and young adults who bravely share their testimonies. Let’s Talk about Sex is the first book of its kind to get straight to the heart of the sex mystery and expose what God has spoken. It will open your understanding of what the Creator of sex has to say about the wonderful “machine” that He purposely designed to be a blessing!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Pastor David
• Release date: Nov 30, 2014
• ISBN: 9780990649144

Pastor David

‘Yemi Adesiyan, lovingly known as Pastor David, is a man of vision and prayer. His primary mission is to proclaim the uncompromising Word of God. His commitment is evident as he delivers God’s word passionately. After several years of running away from the calling of the Lord...an act like Jonah’s...he finally accepted after he was given a message that “I am the Lord, make your choice. I can make you disabled and will still use you as my vessel to deliver my message.” Remembering that Saul, who did not submit himself, was arrested by being made blind on his way to Damascus and changed to Paul for a cause that he had fought against for years. In this end time, God is not wasting time, and is recruiting irrespective of age, race, and gender. The harvest is ripe but workers are few.He has an undergraduate degree in Philosophy from Ogun State University (now Olabisi Onabanjo University) in Nigeria; he has studied Counseling, and has a Postgraduate degree in Disaster Management from Coventry University in the UK. These have all put him in a position to understand and have a word when disaster strikes in different spheres of life, and how to prevent these disasters from happening. He quotes Psalm 11:3, “When the foundations are being destroyed, what can the righteous do?”How does he feel about different denominations? He envisions all as a conduit of God’s love and power as they reach out to the world, with each church influencing its local community.Pastor David’s evangelistic journey has encompassed travel throughout the US, Europe, Canada and Nigeria. He has been committed to winning souls to Christ, and has been affecting people of various ethnic, religious, and economic affiliations around the world. Not only does he teach, but he also pushes people to grow to higher levels of achievements in their personal lives. He addresses life-issues, such as religion, education, economic awareness, and family life.He has a vision not only to teach the Word of God, but also to build champions ready for 'Divine Deployment’ to usher the assembly of God’s children all over the world into a new level of worship and servitude.Apart from his love for his family, he enjoys playing Scrabble, traveling and driving long distance, and listening to deep, heart touching, mind blowing, heaven lifting, praise and worship music. His favorite clips include “I Give Myself Away” by William McDowell (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ld1cXry5nyM); “Baba” by Sonnie Badu (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pK0w36mtodY); “Alpha and Omega” by Israel Houghton (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLzX3rpbfSA); and “I call You faithful” by Donnie McClurkin (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eY4VhpwKdyE)

Book preview

Chapter One

What is Sex?

You’re hanging out with friends at the mall on a Friday evening. Seems every store where you want to shop has blaring music thumping away its subtle messages at you to find a mate, to dabble in a physical relationship, to eventually love ‘em and leave ‘em for something or someone more exciting.

Don’t have the right look to hook that special someone? No problem. Nearly every retailer on the block has a model or two for you to follow. The message is clear: dress like this, wear your hair this way, use this fragrance, put on these shoes, use this language, etc., and you will become the player. And in case you fear you and your hot date will find nothing to do together, there is even a store with a line of novel sex toys just waiting to be explored.

The pressure is on. You face it in the media, in your daily shopping routine, and in nearly every social circle imaginable (sometimes even in the church youth group!). You are expected to pair off with someone and explore the wonderful world of mature behavior and adult themes. You are bullied into believing that having sex equals being loved and cared for – a basic human need, especially at your age. Failure to participate is sure to bring social rejection and a label that you feel you will never get rid of, not to mention the loss of an opportunity of a lifetime!

How do Christian young people fit into the adult world around them that is continually trying to entice them to participate? Is there anything really wrong with participating? Is there a form of sex that God would approve for this stage of life? What does God really think of sex, anyway?

Before we get too far along in our discussion, we really need to define what sex is since there are so many different opinions about its scope. Is it only going all the way, or does it also include acts such as touching private areas with the hand or oral stimulation? Perhaps a friend calls herself a virgin, but she has engaged in extensive touching or oral stimulation…is she still a virgin?

Definitions

Ok, let’s take an actual dictionary definition of sex. A strict dictionary definition of sexual intercourse is penetrating the vagina with the penis. So, I guess going all the way is the winner, right? Mmm…not necessarily.

The dictionary defined sexual intercourse, but we need to talk about something much broader than that. We need to discuss sexual behavior. Why? Because Jesus Himself defined it in much broader terms than simply intercourse.

In Matthew 5:27-28 Jesus warned,

You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

So, clearly, the definition extends far beyond actual intercourse. For starters, let’s consider ways to be sexually active without going all the way. All skin-on-skin contact with personal, private areas of the body have to be considered. Some of those include:

Penis/anal contact

Oral genital contact

Manual genital stimulation

Fondling the breasts

Masturbation

All of the above should be considered sexual behaviors since they involve the personal, private, otherwise-protected areas of the body that are not shared with the general public, or even with multiple friends. Are they right? Wrong? Moral? Immoral? Well, let’s first of all take a look at how the Bible introduces the idea of sexual behavior. After all, if you want to know how the machine works, you should consult its inventor, right? So, since God is the Creator of life and the body, we should see what He has to say about its functions. We’ll begin at the beginning – all the way back to creation. Let’s take a look at Genesis 2:7

the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being. 18 The LORD God said, It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. 19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman, ‘ for she was taken out of man. 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. 25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

There you have it: the first mention of sexual behavior in the Bible. When God determined that Adam needed companionship, He made a unique creature for the task, a woman. She was unique in the way she came into being: she was taken from man’s side. She was flesh of his flesh and bone of his bone. And when Adam opened his eyes after that deep, surgical sleep that God induced, he said, OH, WOW! (Well, you have to read the fine print to see that part...lol) She was gorgeous! All the other creatures that Adam had met and named earlier in the day were covered with scales, fur, or feathers, but this creature was naked! And Adam loved what he saw! In fact, they both were naked, and they did not feel any shame at all. Their relationship was God-ordained, and they were innocent of all impurity.

Sex did not originate in the corrupted, sinful world; it originated with God Himself. It is a spiritual act that reflects the very nature of the Godhead. Man and woman’s unity ("bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh) as well as the fact that they were mates for a lifetime reflect the very character of the God in whose image they were created.

Then, God gave this couple their very first recorded command in Genesis 1:

27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. 28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.

Can you believe it? The FIRST thing God told this couple to do was to go have sex! I think it is safe to say that sexual behavior originated with God.

What is its purpose?

The obvious answer to the purpose question is found in Genesis 1:28. The man and the woman were commanded to come together in sexual union to use their made in the image of God qualities to be creative and to fill the earth. They were to have babies – lots and lots of them! The entire future human race would depend upon their obedience to this command of procreation.

In addition to the obvious procreation command (to have offspring), sexual union gave the man and woman a special bond that was not to be shared with anyone else. It was uniquely theirs. It brought them each comfort and a sense of refreshment as they retreated to their own private ‘get-away’ place – particularly after sin entered the picture and made life much more difficult.

What made sex so right back then, and why is it sometimes viewed as so wrong today? Well, remember, the Biblical record of God-ordained sex placed it under the following conditions:

It was between a man and his female counterpart.

It was confined to the innocence of their one flesh relationship with one another, not broadcast to the world or shared with others.

It reflected God’s creative nature.

It reflected God’s faithfulness.

It reflected God’s view of true love (which we will discuss in a later chapter).

Can we say that all of this is true in sexual relationships today? No, not always. Sex was created by God to give man and woman an expression of