Advent Calendar

By Venla Mäkelä

Advent Calendar - 24 very short stories of Finnish Christmas.
Family gatherings, office Christmas parties, rushing to buy the right gift, the stress and joys and loneliness of the holidays. All this and more, a humorous take on the Finns and Christmas in Finland.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Venla Mäkelä
• Release date: Dec 2, 2018
• ISBN: 9780463081594

Venla Mäkelä

Venla Mäkelä writes screenplays and fiction.She lives in Los Angeles with her family.

Book preview

ADVENT CALENDAR

- 24 very shorts stories of Finnish Christmas -

Venla Mäkelä

Copyright 2018 by Venla Mäkelä

Smashwords Edition

Cover illustration by Owen Abrams

Chapter 1

CRACKER PETE

My husband and I ran into a neighbor at a street market, and even before seeing the neighbor herself I recognized her dog because it is so goofy looking, like a large hairy stunned baby. A mix of a pug and ja Shih-Tzu. It looks like a space creature.

In the car on the way home we tried to remember what the dog's name was again. It had two parts, like Benny Bisquit, or Cookie Carl.

Cracker Pete, my husband suggested, and we got so hysterical I almost crashed the car.

We later remembered the dog was called Furry Frankie, but this imaginary Cracker Pete had already become very much alive in our minds. Cracker Pete has pulled the doormat into the living room again! one of us might suddenly holler. Or, Cracker Pete has taken all the cheese and crackers from the table! And we laughed. I said that if we ever get a dog, it has to be called Cracker Pete. My husband asked what my cousin would say - his name is Peter and we call him Pete - and I said he'd just be happy, he's a dog person.

Soon we started talking about Cracker Pete every day. We sent each other texts that ended with things like Don't forget to fill Cracker Pete's water bowl and Don't feed Cracker Pete too much, is getting quite pudgy. Cracker Pete came up with all kinds of mischief, like eating the insides of a mattress and puncturing shampoo bottles. A real monster. If we were on a walk, we talked how fast or slow Cracker Pete was, and how he hates bicycles. ...Cracker Pete will have a fit, one of us would mutter quietly when a skateboard approached.

My husband's mother is mildly exhausting and teeters on the edge of martyrdom and only talks about how her arthritis is worsening day by day, or how the neighbors' kids lassoed the shrubbery with a jump rope, and so on, but we try to be patient, she really is a nice person after all.

Once when we were over for coffee my husband started glancing at the floor, making sort of do not beg-faces and it was so hard not to burst out laughing. When his mom went to get more coffee, my husband pretended to give a piece of gingerbread but just a small bite! and right after I pretended to be horrified, throwing my hands in the air when Cracker Pete snatched the whole pecan pie! We shook from quiet laughter and couldn't stop, and when my mother-in-law came back she stepped on the cookie bit that my husband hadn't picked up and looked at us really hurt, thinking we were making fun of her.

It's just... we have this imaginary dog, I said, wiping tears.

Cracker Pete, my husband said and hiccuped, which made us explode, and my mother-in-law thought we were stupid and childish which we were. I ordered the box-set of Downton Abbey for her at Christmas, I felt so remorseful.

I understand if some of you think this story is moronic. But we couldn't help it, Cracker Pete had taken over. Even on a holiday on the Greek islands we wondered what Cracker Pete was up to at home - somehow it was clear to us he had not bothered to travel with us. I missed him, and my husband missed him too.

Then about a year later, one day on the way home, I saw a note on the supermarket bulletin board. It said Looking for a new home. Some people had to give away their new(ish) dog because they were allergic. And in the photo there was Cracker Pete. I was shocked, it really was Cracker Pete, with this messy grinning pirate-face. I immediately snapped a photo and sent it to my husband with no explanation and in seconds I got the answer, Go get him! And right away I left for the dog.

The woman who opened the door seemed a bit overwhelmed. I saw that the hall wallpaper and the door trims were chewed. Cracker Pete appeared and stood slightly tilted like someone who's been waiting for a bus. Our eyes met and I swear he smiled, and I smiled back. The woman went to get Cracker Pete's stuff.

Hello Cracker Pete, I said.

Cracker Pete's tail swished. The woman returned and handed me a food bowl, a bag of dog food and a leash. I don't think there's anything we didn't already go over on the phone, she said.

Nope, everything crystal clear, I said.

We won't be able to take him back, the woman warned.

Of course not, I said and left fast, and the woman closed the door just as fast. I was at the front of the building when I realized Cracker Pete was not even on a leash.

The parking lot was dusted with fresh snow. Cracker Pete immediately knew which one was our car. And at home my husband had made him a dog food cake. Cracker Pete has not chewed wallpaper or anything ever, but even if he did it wouldn't matter.

*

Chapter 2

THE CLEANING LADY

Every Wednesday Minna Huttunen goes to clean Anssi Lehtinen's apartment. Lehtinen's apartment is at the edge of the Temppeliaukio Church, and from above the flat and round church looks like a space craft. Quite impressive. Every time Minna is over she stops by a window at least once and stares down. Impressive.

Lehtinen's corner apartment is stunning in other ways too, border inlays in the old parquet floor and all that. The furniture is inherited; heavy and elegant. If Lehtinen buys something new, it's always good quality and exquisite. Lehtinen collects art, especially sculptures.

Minna is at her studio flat in Kallio, the part of town preferred by students and the lower middle class. It's Sunday. Lehtinen has told Minna he'll spend the whole month in Australia, no need to clean the apartment. Lehtinen will still pay for the whole month and even gave Minna a Christmas bonus, two hundred euros. The money is already in Minna's bank account, Lehtinen always pays in time.

Sipping tea, Minna looks out of the window. It's five o'clock in the afternoon. Third floor. The street is quiet but littered, two plastic bags twirling in a breeze. An old woman with a mustard color beret comes out of the corner market and walks with short old person steps. When Minna looks up, it feels as if the neighbor's window is thrown at her face. One can see someone lying on the sofa, the corner of a TV flashing. It feels as if week by week the house next door moves closer, the street becomes narrower - soon the neighbor's window will be touching Minna's window.

Minna wonders how she could have an apartment like Lehtinen's. How come Lehtinen can afford such a wonderful apartment? Lehtinen is at least ten years younger than Minna, in his mid-thirties. A nice-looking, calm, nice man. He's almost never at home when Minna cleans.

Lehtinen's apartment is on the eight floor. The beautiful view over the city has a calming effect. Suddenly Minna wants to be in Lehtinen's apartment.

In just a moment Minna is there. Feels as if a gust of wind has flown her over the icy Töölönlahti bay. Minna stands in the hall and listens. The apartment smells like fresh wood and citrus and leather furniture. Minna takes off her puffer jacket and her boots and goes to the window to take a look at the ufo-like church. There's fresh snow on top of it. There are people in front of the church, tourists? The view has started to lose it's details, only