It’S All About Him: Intimacy with God

By Dr. Lois Brittell

Its All about Him comes from an author who has wrestled with God and her own emotions. The book reveals how God has met her, leads her, and cared for her in his faithfulness. Here is a practical, helpful work for Christians who desire to grow in their life with God.

Rev. Kent Meads, Community Presbyterian Church

d

The statement Its all about Him often leads to the question Who is he (him)? When the author asks, Who do you think he is? she gets varying responses. A few guessed it is God. When answering the question from a biblical perspective, it becomes clear God is the center of the universe: its all about Him. This awareness conflicts with many of the assumptions at work in todays culture.

A licensed psychologist, Dr. Brittell came across the question What is it all about? in many forms. People are searching for meaning and attachment, sometimes in all the wrong places. The loss of selfresulting from anxiety, depression, and other disordersis not only a personal loss but a cultural loss as well. For Christians there are answers in the Bible. Many have no idea how or where to find them. Those who are unfamiliar with Christian principles may have no idea where to begin looking for the answers.

In reading Its All about Him you will find principles that were established at the time of creation and have continued to this day. Your sense of self, worth, and purpose are found in relationship with God. Finding God in a world full of noise, clutter, and fantasies is not always easy, but it is always simple.

An excellent study for a small group setting.

Rev. Rich Latta, pastor, Dinuba Presbyterian Church

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jan 24, 2014
• ISBN: 9781490819051

Dr. Lois Brittell

A clinical psychologist specializing in the treatment of anxiety, depression, and marital problems, the author found most issues were influenced by a person’s relationship to God. She sought biblical answers in addition to clinical answers. Dr. Brittell retired recently and continues to enjoy consulting, teaching and writing. She lives near Fresno, California.

Book preview

Copyright © 2014 Dr. Lois Brittell.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®). Copyright © 2000; 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

All Scripture quotations marked AB are taken from The Amplified Bible, Old Testament. Copyright © 1965, 1987 by the Lockman Foundation, Zondervan. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

All Scripture quotations marked NKJV are from the Life Principles Bible. Copyright © 2005 by Charles F. Stanley. Holy Bible, New King James Version® (NKJV®), copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

All Scripture quotations marked NEB are from the New English Bible, copyright © Cambridge University Press and Oxford University Press 1961, 1970. All rights reserved.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-4908-1904-4 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-1903-7 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-1905-1 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013922229

WestBow Press rev. date: 3/07/2014

Contents

Foreword

Gratitudes

Preface

Introduction

1 It’s All About Him

2 Created And Redeemed By Him

3 Identity In Him

4 Loving Him And Your Neighbor

5 Some Of His Ways Of Love

6 Praying To Him—Intimacy With God

7 Anxiety, Or Peace With Him

8 Depression, Or Contentment With Him

9 Arrogance, Or Humility Before Him

10 Detachment, Or Trust In Him

11 Conviction, Consequences, Condemnation: From Him

12 Restoration By Him

Afterword

Sources

To God And His Glory

With Gratitude

To The Reverend Kent Meads

FOREWORD

I imagine that you were drawn to this book for one of a few reasons. Maybe you are struggling with life, feeling overwhelmed by something like anxiety, arrogance, or depression. You know you should trust God with these things, but you are not quite sure how to trust him. You might be a counselor or pastor yourself, looking to grow in your ability to help people. Or maybe you were drawn to this book because you want to remember how God used the author to help you trust him more and walk with him day by day. Put another way, maybe you are like me, someone whom the author has helped personally.

It was during a time of significant emotional pain that I first met Dr. Lois Brittell. I was twenty-seven years old, with a strong, beautiful wife and two wonderful children. At the time, I was serving on the pastoral staff of a healthy midsize church on California’s Central Coast. From the outside, my life looked pretty good—it was enviable, even. But on the inside, I was struggling deeply with the pressures of life and ministry. On some level, I knew I needed help. Even so, I never really thought I would need counseling, and probably not with someone like Lois. I would have pictured a counselor who looked like Tom Hanks and sounded like Chuck Swindoll. Lois looked and sounded more like my grandmother (and shared her first name). But I was hurting, just desperate enough to get past my pride and preconceptions. So, I walked into her office, sat down in the chair across from her, and told her my story. She listened and told me the truth, the truth about God, about myself, and about how I could change and grow. And you know what? The most amazing thing happened. Through my time with Lois, God began to heal my soul, helping me turn away from chronic worry and people pleasing and turn toward trusting him moment-by-moment, day-by-day.

In the pages that follow, you will hear some of the same things that Lois shared with me during our time together. My hope and prayer is that this book will do for you what Lois did for me personally. I pray that it will help your vision of God grow. I pray that your understanding of what it means to walk with him day by day will be expanded and made practical. I pray that you will grow in your understanding and ability to really trust God, to his glory, because it really is all about him!

In Christ,

Brian Farone, 2013

Director of Biblical Theology and Credentialing for Evangelical Free Church of America (EFCA) West

Grover Beach, CA

GRATITUDES

These are the people the Lord brought into my life and who have given hours, days, or decades to me, some to facilitate the process of writing this book. Dennie and Penny Newell were instrumental in the development of the first draft; Penny co-taught the original draft with me at Grace Bible Church, Arroyo Grande, California, during Coffee Break 2008. They have continued to be ministering friends through all the crises that followed. The twenty-two women in the class actively participated. Their feedback was helpful for the final draft of the manuscript. The Reverend Joe Bubar, my pastor and friend during the decade I was a member of Grace Bible Church, encouraged me to be all that God has called me to be.

The Reverend Kent Meads, my pastor and mentor during the writing of the final draft, provided a lifeline during the three and a half years of my restoration in God. His ministry and friendship have brought great healing into my life. His participation as the primary first reader was invaluable.

First readers provided valuable insights. They are the Rev. Kent Meads and the Rev. Brian Farone. Second readers provided much-needed clarity: Cindy Correia, Rose Hall, the Rev. Rich Latta, Kathleen Martens, and Lela Nickell.

I owe much gratitude to Sharon Wilgenburg, who served as friend, copyreader, encourager, and computer specialist. She did all the technical work to put my writing into manuscript form. Her friendship, humor, work ethic, and computer expertise brought success to the process of making the writing fit within parameters dictated by the electronic age. Carey Galbraith provided manuscript expertise. For Nathan Barnes, my computer tutor, my gratitude is huge.

The Adult Discipleship Class members at First Presbyterian Church, Dinuba, California, in spring 2012, were active participants and provided valuable feedback and encouragement.

A longtime friend, Annabelle Zimmerman, provided (nearly) daily contact with the outside world. My housekeeper, Yolanda Robledo, kept the dust bunnies in check while I wrote. Marvis Bergen, Dolores Chakerian and numerous other friends provided prayer support.

To the professionals at WestBow Press I owe gratitude, especially to Sandy Brown, my editor, Mary Wegener, my coordinator and Lauren Holmes, my Publishing Services Associate.

To all of you, mentioned or not, who contributed to the person I am and the process of the book, many thanks.

God is sovereign. He has a plan for your life. He will bring it to pass.

To God Be the Glory.

PREFACE

Why another book? There are so many out there already. My compulsion to write is sufficient reason. The Lord will do with this book what he wants.

The hunger in your heart for restoration is overwhelming when you have lived in intimacy with God, and have lost or walked away from it because you made an ungodly choice. You can live, serve, minister, and function in the absence of intimacy with God, but the internal hunger never leaves. You look for it in all the wrong places. Christian work does not fill the void. Being a godly spouse, raising children to know the Lord, having a profession where you can be a daily witness—none of these satisfies the hunger for intimacy with God.

Intimacy with God is more than having been saved, although salvation is, of course, the first step. You cannot have intimacy with someone you have never met or don’t know. You may not have experienced intimacy with God if you have never practiced praying about everything, praying without ceasing, praying all night, thanking him that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, and praising him in the midst of the terrors that come uninvited. Intimacy requires communication as well as interaction. To be intimate is to relate to the innermost character of a person.

God has revealed his innermost character to us in the person of his Son, Jesus. The Bible is the book of the self-revelation of God. His self-revelation is closely related to his passion for us. His desire that we love him is extreme. When we don’t return his love, his wrath can be overwhelming, which is for our good. He promises to care for us, protect us, love us forever, and never leave us, even when he is angry with us.

In writing this book, I have purposely used as few outside sources as possible. I wanted the emphasis to be on God and his work in our lives. My desire is that with the Bible as the primary resource, the reader will look up the passages and internalize them as simply and straightforwardly as possible. Everything is about him. It is all about what he has done and continues to do.

INTRODUCTION

What He Has Done

The first six chapters of this book focus on what God has done in creating man in relationship with himself. He has created us and now sustains the whole of creation. He has blessed us with every imaginable blessing, as well as with some gifts that are beyond our ability to imagine. He has given us life everlasting as well as faith, hope, and love in this life.

In chapter one, we find that everything in the universe is about God. If there is any other god, then it is a false god. He alone is the true God who created all things by the word of his power and for his own glory. He is all and in all. We look at some ways that help us remember that he has created all things, so that we may keep our minds on him.

Chapter two shows us that he created us in his image, to reflect his image, and redeemed us to make us his own. That which we reflect is what most people see of Christ. Will people know of his love and power as a result of their having been close to us? God created each of us unique. He created each of us to glorify him in a way that no one else can. We explore what it means to be redeemed by God.

In chapter three, we speak of identity. Many people are confused about their having been chosen by God. There is confusion about salvation, who we are, who we wish to be, or who we think we should be. Realizing that God has purchased us, which is a choice that cannot be undone, resolves so many issues.

Chapter four changes course. In the first three chapters, we emphasized what God has done. We are now in a relationship with him since he has created and purchased us. In any good relationship, there is give-and-take. We have been on the receiving end up to this point. Now he is asking us to participate.

Chapter four emphasizes the most significant of God’s commandments. He asks that we love him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and that we love our neighbor as ourselves. Together, these make up the first and second commandments, which are the greatest commandments. We will need the wisdom that comes from an active prayer life in order to be able to keep God’s greatest commandments.

Chapter five looks at several examples of loving our neighbor. Our neighbor can be anyone other than God. We look at several examples of love in human relationships.

In chapter six, we examine his command to pray without ceasing. Living a victorious life requires that we maintain a constant and consistent prayer life, given our human frailty. We look at several models of prayer: prayers of intercession for the sins of the people, for his disciples and for those who would come after them. We also look at prayer as a sacrifice of praise.

What Sometimes Happens

The second half of the book focuses on what may happen if we don’t obey God’s commands. Anxiety, depression, arrogance, and detachment are prevalent in our culture and can be the consequences of disobeying God. These responses can damage and destroy lives, families, relationships with others, and one’s relationship with God.

Chapter seven speaks to us about anxiety. Anxiety is one of the most frequent diagnoses in our culture. It involves great stress about something that does not exist. The feared event may occur sometime in the future, or it may not. Anxiety may be caused by a memory of a traumatic event. Since God knows the future and the past, he commands us not to be anxious, to cast our cares on him and to trust him.

In chapter eight, we look at the contrast between contentment with God and depression. In the early days of psychology, depression was regarded as an expression of anger. When managed care was introduced, the emphasis shifted to brain chemical causes—and antidepressants became the treatment of choice. Recently, there has been a shift to cognitive–behavior therapy (CBT) as one of the best treatments.

Chapter nine calls our attention to the arrogance that is in plentiful supply in our culture. The Lord has commanded us to humble ourselves. Humility is neither a fruit nor a gift of the Spirit. It is something we are to cultivate through practice. Christ humbled himself for our sakes. We are to do the same for the sake of his glory.

In chapter ten, we think about how God has given us the commandment and invitation to trust him. He is the only one who is altogether trustworthy. In my own life, because I did not trust him, the time came when I chose a defense mechanism called detachment. This left me numb and unable to feel, which I thought was preferable to being in constant psychological pain.

Chapter eleven looks at the differences between conviction, consequences, and condemnation. These three are sometimes confused with one another. We look at some long-term effects of each.

In chapter twelve, we look at the sovereignty of God and how my coming to grasp his sovereignty led to my personal restoration. To feel I had lost myself and my connection to God was a terrifying experience. By his grace, no one and no thing can take me out of the Father’s hand. He has chosen and redeemed me, teaching me to love, trust, and obey him—and to be content with what he provides. He has convicted but not condemned me. He has provided consequences, both blessed and painful.

He has healed me. He has restored my soul. He will do the same for you.

Thank you, Jesus.

1

IT’S ALL ABOUT HIM

Who is he? I wanted to know.

Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O Lord, and you are exalted as head above all. Both riches and honor come from you, and you rule over all. In your hand are power and might, and in your hand it is to make great and to give strength to all. And now we thank you, our God, and praise your glorious name. (1 Chronicles 29:11–13)

Yours, O Lord is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty. What does this tell you about God?

David knew about the greatness of God when he spoke these words. He had seen the mightiness of God at work in his own life. The Lord had taken him from tending sheep for his father to being King of Israel. The Lord had promised to build him a house (2 Samuel 7:11). The Lord had given him victory in many of the battles he fought with the kings’ armies of surrounding realms (2 Samuel). The Lord had forgiven him, after he repented, for committing adultery with the wife of one of his officers, then having the man killed. This man knew life at its raw edges, and yet God called David a man after his own heart (1 Samuel 13:14).

What feelings do you have about the wholeness of God’s majesty?

Do you want riches and honor? They come from God. The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein, for he has founded it upon the seas and established it upon the rivers (Psalm 24:1; 1 Corinthians 10:26).

Thus says God, the Lord, who created the