Sin the Absence of Love

By Daniel Stevens

Most evangelical Christians have a reasonable grasp on the Bible, especially the New Testament. The challenge is applying the principles taught by Jesus in making decisions. We are all taught to love our neighbor and put others interests ahead of our own. Does this mean we can never consider our own interests? Do we need to give everything away? When competing in sports or business, do we need to let our competitor win if we truly love them? Do we need to give others whatever they ask of us? How do we prevent ourselves from being taken advantage of? Is there sin within the church itself? Why has God set the world up the way He has? What is the purpose of evil and temptation? Why do our survival needs force us to be selfish? These are the questions this book attempts to answer.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Aug 26, 2014
• ISBN: 9781490846026

Daniel Stevens

As well as baking fresh bread every day in the HQ kitchens, Daniel Stevens leads the ever-popular Build and Bake courses, which equip students with the skills to build their own outdoor wood-fired oven. Daniel has been cooking and baking in professional kitchens for several years, in Hertfordshire, where he grew up, and more recently in Dorset, where he now lives. He has been part of the kitchen team at HQ since June 2006.

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1. What Is Sin?

S in is selfishness. Sin is self-centeredness. Sin is putting our self ahead of—before and above—others. Sin is focusing on our own wants and needs. Sin is being preoccupied with our self. It is operating outside of love. It is just that simple. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves (Phil. 2:3).

The Pharisees asked Jesus what the greatest commandment was. Jesus replied, Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is similar: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the law and the prophets hang on these two commandments (Matt. 6:35–40).

Jesus’ response tells us everything we need to know about sin. Sin is violating these two commandments. All sin—all sin—is based on these two commandments. Even though a lack of sin does not get us into heaven and the presence of sin in our lives doesn’t preclude us from heaven (this will be discussed in the next chapter), it is vital that we understand what sin is if we are to live Christian lives. The reason all of the Law and the Prophets (all the writings of the Old Testament) hang on these two commandments is that these two sum up all the other commandments. The first four commandments are the following:

1. You shall have no other gods before me.

2. You shall not make idols.

3. You shall not misuse the name of the Lord.

4. You shall keep holy the Sabbath.

These four commandments are summed up with "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind(Matt 22:37). If we truly love God, we will have no other gods besides the one true God. If we truly love God, we will not make or worship idols. If we truly love God, we will not misuse His name and we will keep the Sabbath holy. The first four commandments are summed up in two words: Love God.

The remaining six commandments are these:

5. Honor your father and mother.

6. Do not to murder.

7. Do not steal.

8. Do not commit adultery.

9. Do not give false testimony against your neighbor.

10. Do not covet your neighbor’s spouse or property. The last six commandments are summed up in three words: Love our neighbor.

If we love others, which includes our father and our mother, we will honor them. If we love our neighbors, we will not steal from them, much less murder them. If we love our spouse and our family, we will not commit adultery. If we love our neighbors, we will not give false testimony against them or covet their spouse or property. The essence of these principles is love—love God and love others. The Apostle Paul further defines love in 1 Corinthians 13: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, does not boast. It is not proud. It is not rude, not self-seeking, not easily angered, and keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

Sin is the opposite. Sin is selfishness. Sin is putting one’s own interests ahead of the interests of God or our neighbors. As the psalmist put it: For the wicked boasts of his heart’s desire and blesses the covetous, whom the Lord abhors. The wicked, through the pride of his countenance, will not seek after God; God is not in his thoughts at all (Ps.10:3). When we focus only on ourselves and our needs, there is no room for love in our hearts.

The First Commandment: Love of God

Let’s examine the first commandment: Love God. This is the first and most important rule. This means placing God ahead of ourselves. Our love of ourselves interferes with our love of God. When we focus on ourselves, we cannot truly love God. That is why God loves those who are both humble and contrite (Isa. 66:2).When we focus on our own selfish desires and benefits to the exclusion of God, we are breaking the first great commandment and committing the most serious of all sins.

But what does loving God mean?

Loving God with all your strength, soul, spirit, and mind involves what we do, say, and think on a daily basis. Let’s break this down a bit. First, a person who loves God communicates with God regularly. If we love God, we want Him to be a part of our life, so we communicate with Him. This communication with God may not be formal. We can talk to God while driving your car or lying in bed. In fact, there is no place where we can’t talk to God.

Second, loving God means keeping Him in our thoughts throughout the day. By keeping Him in our thoughts, we are staying in contact with Him, and this is an expression of love.

Loving God means going to church. The church is the House of God, and most Christians agree that they feel His presence strongly while in church. Going to church is setting aside time from our regular schedule to devote our full attention to God and what He is doing in lives.

Loving God means worshipping God, singing His praises. This, too, is done primarily in church. When we worship God, we are vocalizing and expressing our feelings, which communicates and reinforces them. When I first became a believer, a popular Christian song sung often in contemporary worship services was Shout to the Lord. This majestic hymn, written by Darlene Zschech, uses powerful imagery from the Psalms, particularly chapters 95 through 100. I love that song even though I can’t sing and am tone deaf. The song still gives me goose bumps with such phrases as my comfort, my shelter, tower of refuge and strength and mountains bow down and the seas will roar at the sound of your name. Anyone who enjoys music realizes its effects on the emotions. Singing about—and to—God is still one of the best avenues of worship.

Loving God means giving God credit for His role in our accomplishments. All of our accomplishments are achieved with God’s help and are the result of God’s acting through us. When we acknowledge this fact, we are expressing our love for God. Contrast the professional football player who, after scoring a touchdown, says a small prayer or points to the sky to give God credit with the one who reacts with a fist pump or the triumphant finger to show that he is number one, giving himself all the credit for his success.

Finally, loving God means acknowledging God before others. Jesus said, Whoever acknowledges me before others, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before others, I will disown before my Father in heaven (Matt. 10:32–33).

Loving God means making God part of our life, communicating with Him, and expressing our feelings toward Him. Here’s a little exercise that will help you discover how we are to treat God. Simply ask yourself, How do you treat those in your life that you truly love? We will see that we express our love by giving them time, attention, care, and respect. If we understand what loving people means, we will understand what loving God means. Do we treat God the same way we treat those whom we love with time, care, and attention?

The Root of All Sin: Love of Self

Sin on the other hand, is just the opposite. All sin derives from a selfish attitude and a consuming focus on self. Selfish people don’t have time to pray. They’re too busy doing things for themselves. The truth is, they don’t give prayer much thought. The only time they communicate with God is when they get themselves into a jam and are desperate for any they can get. The prayer of the desperate is always self-centered—focused not on expressing love for God but on getting something from God.

Selfish people do not keep God in their thoughts because their focus is continually on themselves and their own needs, desires, and problems. They have no room in their lives for God because they are too big to fit God in. They don’t find God beneficial.

Selfish, self-focused people typically do not go to church. Church is an inconvenience and a waste of time—time that could be better spent sleeping in, doing yard work, or playing golf. Self-focused people have no desire to worship or praise God because they take credit for every good thing that happens in their lives. They certainly don’t give God any credit except possibly through a platitude or an offhand remark such as I’m blessed. Again, the focus is on who is blessed—I—rather than on the one who does the blessing—God.

Even when they do go to church, the selfish are typically reluctant to give their money—money that could be better spent on them. Back when I was exploring the possibility of taking religion seriously, I went to a church and placed $10 in the collection plate. At the time I considered this to be very generous and felt quite pleased with myself. But as my faith has grown, so has my perspective. One lesson new Christians learn is that you can’t out-give God. The more you give to God and others, the more you receive.

Self-centered people do not acknowledge God before others because God plays such a small role in their lives. They feel uncomfortable talking about God because they don’t know Him, they don’t understand Him, and they have never taken the time to learn anything about Him. Jesus warned people about their priorities. He said, But first seek His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matt. 6:33).

Selfish people have this backward. Instead of seeking God first, they seek their own needs and desires first. Instead of trusting in God to take care of them and their needs, they trust in themselves. God becomes a second or third priority, if He’s a priority at all, in their life. God is merely an afterthought; their first thought and indeed their entire focus is on themselves.

So the selfish put themselves and their selfish interests not only above God but above their neighbor as well. This is the failure to love one’s neighbor as oneself. Those who place others’ interests ahead of their own are referred to as altruistic, charitable, kind, generous, or even heroic. All religions embrace the concept of altruism, which is a difficult task. Concern for others is not a uniquely Christian teaching. Buddhism, Islam, and Hinduism all respect the qualities of altruism, charity, and brotherhood. It is universally agreed that sin relates to selfishness and selfish interests, particularly with one’s neighbors and others. Jesus made it clear how we are to deal with others when He said, You have heard that it was said, ‘ Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. (Matt. 5:43–44).

Throughout the day, we have opportunities either to do something good or kind for someone else or to focus on our own selfish needs and desires. Small acts, such as opening the door for a stranger or listening attentively as someone tells us her story, are opportunities either to be selfless or to be selfish. During the course of each day, we can give others praise and encouragement or teasing, criticism, and judgment. We can lend others a hand or manipulate them for our own gain.

If our goal is to lead a sinful life, there’s no better way to achieve it than to develop an attitude or perspective that focuses on us. If our goal is to live a Christ-like life, however, we can look for opportunities to simply be kind. We can develop an attitude that strives to make life easier and happier for those around us. Ironically, the less we focus on ourselves, the happier we become. This is what love is all about.

In addition to putting themselves above God and neighbor, selfish people also fall short (sin) in following Jesus’ commandment to love our neighbor as we love our self. This is a more difficult concept because love of self is different from self-focus. As Jesus taught it, self-love is an act not of selfishness but of appreciation. In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul stated: Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. (1 Cor. 6:19–20).

My brother-in-law grew up in Iran before the Muslim revolution, during the time of the Shah. His father was very wealthy and spoiled him. He recalls an occasion when, as a teenager, he asked his father for money. His father handed him a $100 bill. He wanted more, so in disgust he ripped up the $100 bill and threw it in his father’s face. The family later experienced a bitter change of fortune after his father died, and the family’s wealth disappeared during the Muslim takeover. The young man matured, and over the past forty years has worked long hours to support his wife and four boys in a modest lifestyle—often haunted by the memory of that ungrateful young man who turned up his nose at a measly $100 bill.

At some point, each of us is equally ungrateful for the gifts that God has blessed us with. We sin when we fail to appreciate the fact that our body and even our very existence are gifts from God. We need to treat ourselves not as God’s gift to the world but as God’s gift to us! This concept of self-love can easily be misinterpreted and abused. We can twist Jesus’ teaching and use it to justify placing our own needs and desires above others. That is not what is meant here. God put us on earth for a purpose—and that is to grow and mature into the type of person God wants to associate with. Why would God want to associate with a self-centered creature who has no time for Him? Where there is no love, there can be no meaningful relationship.

God has given each of us unique talents. In the parable of the talents, Jesus talks about the gifts of God and how we are to use them (Matt. 25:14–30). We are given the gift of life along with various skills and abilities. If we waste or misuse these gifts through laziness, fear, or neglect, we have committed a sin. This, too, is the sin of selfishness that occurs when we focus on our own self-interests, our own needs and desires, as opposed to concentrating on God’s purpose for us here on earth. This attitude also demonstrates a lack of faith and trust in God to help us deal with our problems and achieve our potential. To fulfill our purpose on earth, we must follow certain guidelines to avoid sin, bearing in mind that we are vessels of the Holy Spirit. To love ourselves, we need to do what is best for us (as God defines it) and not merely what we desire. Let’s look at a few all-too-common ways we reject God’s gift of life and abuse the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Abusing drugs and alcohol causes us to avoid life, to turn inside ourselves, and to escape from the world. When we do this, we are sinning against God and His gift of life. People use substances to avoid life and its challenges and struggles, and in the process damage their bodies, minds, and relationships. This is a waste of God’s precious gift of life. This is a form of cowardice, and, although the Bible doesn’t say this in so many words, God hates cowardice.

I have a close relative who is addicted to heroin. She became addicted through the use of pain killers. As the pain killers provided less of a high along with unpleasant side effects, heroine became a cheaper more effective alternative. During her period of addiction she neglected her children and spent all the money she earned or stole on heroine, gas and cigarettes. She had no money for anything else. After going through detoxification and serious residential treatment she realized what she missed out with her family and true friends. She is working hard to maintain her new life style and her belief in God played an important role in her treatment.

Suicide is the ultimate rejection of God’s gift of life and is rooted in selfishness. Suicide results from focusing on our weaknesses and our problems. Suicide equates to treating God’s gift of life with contempt. We have an obligation to God and to ourselves to use the gifts He has given us to glorify Him and to serve the interests of others. Committing suicide dishonors God, the giver of life, and harms others by causing extreme grief to surviving friends and family.

A good friend of mine lost his 15-year-old son to suicide. The parents greeted mourners at the funeral for over five hours, the line stretching for two blocks outside the church. If the boy had only realized how much so many people cared about him, he might have reconsidered his decision. Even today his dad can’t go a day without grieving the loss of his beloved son. In the aftermath of the loss, the mother blamed the father and divorced him.

Selfishness is a simple concept. We see it in the two-year-old child who is totally focused on his own needs and desires and has little care or concern for anyone else. The two-year-old does not want to follow rules or be told what to do and constantly makes demands of the people around him. My grandson Walter used to like to go to McDonald’s and play on the jungle gym with the other kids. After two hours of play, it was time to go. A typical two-year-old, he screamed, thrashed, and kicked while I put his shoes and coat on. At the ripe old age of three, he is much better behaved and has more consideration for others. In God’s eyes, when we focus only on ourselves, we are expressing the two-year-old mentality.

To recap: The basis of all sin is selfishness and self-focus to the exclusion of God, of others, and of God’s purpose for our life. It is simple and easily understood. It applies to all people in all times and permeates all cultures and civilizations. Scripture describes it as "written on our hearts(2 Corinthians 3:2). Though this formula is easy to understand, it is difficult to apply to the complex day-to-day decisions that each of us must make. The following chapters discuss how to apply the general principle to our decision-making process in everyday situations.

2. Sin and Getting into Heaven

A common belief in virtually every culture throughout human history has always been that good people are rewarded when they die. Buddhists believe that good people eventually achieve some form of eternal enlightenment. Hindus believe that good people are reincarnated in a higher life form. Islam preaches that good people reach paradise. Even the Greeks, the Romans, and the Vikings, with their plethora of gods, believed in a favorable afterlife for people who led a worthy life. Despite agreement on a just reward for those who lead a good life, however, these religions differ as to what heaven or paradise is like and whether a god or gods exist—and, if so, what he, she, or they expect of us.

Obviously, not all of these religions and ideas can be right. That is a logical impossibility. The Bible, God’s true revelation to man, teaches that there is one God. God is who He is (as He presented Himself to Moses: I am that I am) despite the multitude of gods that man imagines. In the Old Testament, one of the things that angered God most was man’s inventing of false gods such as Baal and Ishira (who were not gods at all). It is quite easy to create a god according to one’s own wishes and desires. God created man in His own image. Someone said man has been trying to repay the favor ever since.

Grandfather God: Creating God in Man’s Own Image

Many people today, including Christians, continue to invent their own god or gods. They find this much easier than studying Scripture to understand who God is and what He expects. The god commonly invented today is a loving grandfatherly figure who forgives everyone’s sins (which he doesn’t even take too seriously). He sees into people’s hearts and realizes that they are basically good. The man-created god loves them and wants them all to join him in heaven. This god is sort of a pushover, so there is little fear or respect for him.

This view of God lets people minimize their evil deeds, justify their mistakes, and live the life that they want to lead believing that regardless of what they do, they will go to heaven. They follow their own rules. Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley sang a sort of hymn to this view of god in the song I Did It My Way. Even criminals in prison justify their actions. No one wants to believe in hell. No one wants to believe that he, his friends or loved ones are not going to heaven. In our day, very few priests or pastors are courageous enough to preach sermons on hell and who is going there. People don’t want to hear about that.

There is a certain logic behind this. Why shouldn’t good people go to heaven? Gandhi was a great humanitarian and a pacifist. Why should he be denied entrance to heaven just because he wasn’t a Christian? David Berkowitz, the notorious serial killer nicknamed Son of Sam, has accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior in prison and thus by Christian standards is destined for heaven. Why should David Berkowitz go to heaven and a man like Gandhi be left behind? Jeffrey Dahmer was baptized and accepted Christ in prison. The pastor who baptized him lost half of his congregation after they discovered what he had done. Should Dahmer, who by no means was a good person, go to heaven despite his dastardly deeds…just because he became a Christian?

Most people acknowledge that the existence of a creation implies a creator. Without doing intellectual gymnastics, the facts that we exist and that the earth exists in a form of harmony and balance implies there is a God. Most people in the world believe in a God of some sort. In fact, with the advent of the Big Bang Theory, many scientists now believe in a God because they can pinpoint the exact moment in time when the universe began, which implies a creative act and thus a creator.

Understanding the One True God and His Moral Code

God has definite characteristics. He is omniscient. He is omnipotent. He is omnipresent. He is the way He is despite whatever characteristics people may attribute to Him. As God, He has established a moral law. We are not free to create our own moral code. God’s rules are described in the Bible and apply to everyone. To understand them, we must study the Bible.

Beginning Christians

Although Christians make up about one-sixth of the world’s population, many have only a casual understanding of what Christianity truly means. The first level of understanding involves all who call themselves Christians. They say they believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God, but when asked why Christ had to die, they have a hard time answering. Why did God allow Jesus to be tortured to death? Why couldn’t God have simply allowed all people who live good lives to go to heaven? Christians who do not understand these concepts are beginning Christians.

Intellectual Christians

The second level of Christian understanding entails comprehending salvation on an intellectual level. This group understands that Christ paid the price for our sins and that those who believe in Christ have eternal life. But when asked what belief in Christ means, they answer by affirming that He lived and did what He said He did. If asked whether believing in Him has changed their lives, many of these intellectual Christians are not able to answer this question with a truthful yes.

Born Again Christians

The third group of Christians, those who are clearly saved, are those who have been born again. They have gone through a transformation process, or a life change. They don’t just believe in Jesus on an intellectual level—they believe in Him in their heart. This belief in their heart means they have abandoned their former selves and have turned their lives over to Christ. Christ now lives inside of them and governs their decisions. Christ inside of them is referred to as the Holy Spirit.

This transformation causes them to see sin differently. Actions that in the past seemed rather innocuous are now seen as clearly wrong and in violation of God’s moral code. Actions involving pride, impatience, disrespect, anger, drinking, gambling, smoking, promiscuity, and pornography are seen from a brand-new perspective. Born-again Christians have both the desire to change their lives and the power to do so. They are now in direct communication with God.

These people refer to their new life as a walk with Christ. By this they mean that over the course of the rest of their life, they are committed to striving to become more and more like Jesus. Their intent is to become less and less sinful (self-full) and more and more Christ-like as His Spirit fills them. They see sin in a different light and have the power to change. From the Christian perspective, this rebirth is what guarantees Christians eternal life.

The Only Way to Heaven

This rebirth that comes from accepting Jesus into our heart is what ensures that we will go to heaven. Good deeds, selflessness, and charity are by-products of this change. People who have gone through this transformation process see their actions differently. Being kind and selfless becomes much more important to them.

These new Christians see their walk with Christ as a battle against selfishness. God has given them a new perspective on every situation they face. The old motivations and desires are no longer as important as they used to be. This new perspective allows Christians to place God and others ahead of themselves. Instead of focusing on themselves, they focus on others. This selflessness is a mark of the new birth.