Make a Difference: the Challenge of Excellence: Volume 1 of the Eagle Leadership Series for College Students
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About this ebook
Do you want to achieve excellence? Would you enjoy having happier, healthier relationships with those around you? Do you want to make a difference in the lives of others? Are you ready to grow on a personal level?
Achieving excellence requires a commitment to continual personal development. Personal development begins with a better understanding of yourself and those around you.
This book is designed to help you begin the process and provide you with the understanding and the tools that will help you
grow. I believe that helping others to grow and experience better relationships is the purpose of my life, and is also the purpose of this book. I want to teach you how to build better relationships with the people you love, live with and lead.
Dr. Larry Little
Dr. Larry Little is a husband, father, author, entrepreneur, and executive coach. He is the CEO of Eagle Consulting, an international leadership firm. His work is rooted in the power of relationships, and his goal is to equip leaders to make a difference in the lives of those that they love, live with, and lead.
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Make a Difference - Dr. Larry Little
Copyright © 2012 by Eagle Consulting, LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
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Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
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ISBN: 978-1-4759-1072-8 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4759-1073-5 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-4759-1074-2 (ebk)
iUniverse rev. date: 05/16/2012
CONTENTS
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
PREFACE
INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER ONE UNDERSTANDING YOUR PERSONALITY
CHAPTER TWO CHALLENGING THE MYTHS WE BELIEVE
CHAPTER THREE MUCH-LOVED MONKEY
CHAPTER FOUR LEADING LIONS
CHAPTER FIVE COMPETENT CAMELS
CHAPTER SIX TRANQUIL TURTLES
CHAPTER SEVEN THE DNA RELATIONSHIP CONTINUUM
CHAPTER EIGHT THE ESSENTIAL GIFTS
CHAPTER NINE WHEN PERSONALITIES CLASH
CHAPTER TEN DEVELOPING TRUST IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
CHAPTER ELEVEN THE CHALLENGE OF EXCELLENCE
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
REFERENCES
Acknowledgement
The EAGLE series is not a product designed to generate revenue. It is not merely a compilation of books designed for marketing purposes. It is not simply another college curriculum for students to work through for credit hours. The EAGLE series is a vision that comes from the heart. It is a hope that can change lives. It is an investment in the future of students.
Much work has been dedicated to this project. Untold hours of brainstorming, writing, editing, more brainstorming, more writing and more editing have been spent toward the completion of the EAGLE series. While I don’t possess many skills, I am extremely gifted in one thing. I have the uncanny ability to pull people around me who are incredibly gifted and then get out of their way. I used this talent in the pursuit of this project.
Mark Beaird is a writer extraordinaire. He did the yeoman’s work on putting our thoughts on paper. He selflessly worked to capture our mind’s eye in creating the manuscript. Melissa Hambrick Jackson was the glue that kept this project on schedule and structured. She has an incredible ability to see the end result and create a path to reach it. Mark and Melissa contributed their insight, knowledge and experienced skill set to develop EAGLE.
It is our desire that the wisdom found in this project would facilitate personal growth and that each one touched by EAGLE would live a legacy of Making a Difference in the lives of others.
Larry
Preface
Do you want to achieve excellence? Would you enjoy having happier, healthier relationships with those around you? Do you want to make a difference in the lives of others? Are you ready to grow on a personal level?
Achieving excellence requires a commitment to continual personal development. Personal development begins with a better understanding of yourself and those around you.
This book is designed to help you begin the process and provide you with understanding and tools that will help you grow.
I hope I never get to a place in my life where I no longer want to pursue growth, opportunities, and making a difference in the lives of others. I believe that is the purpose of my life, and it is also the purpose of this book. This book is all about people: I want to teach you how to build better relationships with the people you love, live with and lead. I want to teach you how to make a difference. This is the path to excellence in leadership and in life and what our work at The Enrichment Center Group is all about.
The Enrichment Center Group is an organization providing counseling and coaching for what our team calls mainstream America: real people with real issues. Our focus is on helping people build and maintain healthy relationships in their lives. Our vision is to provide excellence in counseling and consulting in order to make a difference in the lives of people,
and so far we’ve done just that. Our team consists of licensed, trained therapists who are passionate about walking with all different kinds of people through their seasons of struggle.
The success that we have experienced in counseling and consulting has helped us identify the need for an accurate, easily-accessible book on relationships. The tools and insights contained in this book have made a difference in the lives of multitudes of people that have experienced the counseling and consulting services provided by The Enrichment Center Group.
I sincerely believe that this book will help you to build better relationships in every area of your life. Let’s begin to learn how.
Introduction
The greatest myth about the key relationships in your life is that they just happen.
The truth is every relationship takes work and investment. All relationships in your life are in a state of change; they are either growing or dying. If you are not intentionally investing in your relationships they will gradually become unhealthy, and eventually the relationship may end.
Here’s the good news: you get to decide which relationships in which to invest, and as a result, you likely will see those relationships flourish. With the right tools, you can make significant improvements in the relationships that are the most important to you.
Relationships affect us both psychologically and physically. In fact, research shows that if you maintain supportive, healthy relationships you will most likely feel healthier, happier, and more satisfied with your life. Also, if you surround yourself with strong, positive relationships you are less likely to have mental or physical health problems, and are less likely to participate in activities that are unhealthy. Recent studies have even shown people in healthy relationships tend to have a longer life expectancy than those who are lonely. Conversely, if you engage in toxic relationships, your life expectancy may shorten and your quality of life can decrease.
So you see, life is all about relationships, and we all need positive relationships in every area of our lives. Everyone wants to be healthy and happy, and our relationships play a significant part in our sense of well-being—so why not invest the time, effort, and gain the understanding needed to make the most of all our relationships?
So how do you begin to build better relationships? I contend it begins with an understanding of four basic personality types. Understanding the basic personality types will not only educate you on the type of person you are, but it will also educate you on how to communicate with others depending on their personality types. Understanding how to best communicate with someone based on his/her personality type is the primary way you can invest in relationships that are important to you.
This is the end goal, and the ultimate gift of this book.
CHAPTER ONE
UNDERSTANDING YOUR PERSONALITY
I realize some may ask the question, If our personalities are set, why should we study them?
and Why should we try to change?
Those are good questions. If all we’re going to do is label ourselves and others as having a particular personality type, we are not going to be doing much good. It may be interesting, but, really, what good is it?
The Make a Difference personality profile, like any other, is only an interesting tool at best without an understanding of how the knowledge gained through its use can be utilized. The purpose of the personality profile is certainly not to give the reader a tool for labeling himself or others, or excusing one’s behavior. The purpose of our profile is to develop one’s ability to understand one’s true self. We call this self-awareness.
Self-awareness is primarily an awareness of one’s own thoughts, feelings, and traits, and the affect they have on one’s behavior, decisions, and outlook on life. Achieving self-awareness is the key to experiencing personal growth and positive change in one’s life.
Self-awareness, gained through truly understanding ourselves, can foster the following and more:
• Self-awareness can produce change in our lives.
• Self-awareness can keep us in touch with the reality of how we are actually behaving.
• Self-awareness can change our perspective on life and others.
• Self-awareness can help us to make the most of our talents.
• Self-awareness can become a means of determining our level of and potential for growth.
• Self-awareness can get help us break out of unhealthy behavior patterns.
• Self-awareness can keep us healthy in our thinking.
• Self-awareness can help us with our relationships.
• Self-awareness can empower us to achieve.
The Make a Difference personality profile and concept is about facilitating that Aha!
moment each person has as he becomes more conscious of who he is and what makes him tick. However, it’s important to keep in mind that our personality types do not predict our ability to succeed. Anyone can succeed in life regardless of his or her personality type. Personality type does not determine talent. There are talented people of all personality types. Personality type is not even a sure predictor of compatibility between two people who have fallen in love. So, to revisit the question, Why should we study our personalities, our tendencies, or the traits and qualities we possess?
As we have already pointed out, the answer is found as we explore the concept of self-awareness. Self-awareness is what you achieve in the process of studying personality, and your self-awareness is going to grow as you read and apply the insights found in this book.
In Self-Awareness: The hidden driver of success and satisfaction,