The Messiah Method Counseling System: Power-Life Principles for Daily Living
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About this ebook
Dr. Marlin Lance, Ph.D., DCC, DPSc (Diplomat of Pastoral Science) is president of Messiah Method Ministries, Inc., a multi-faceted ministry of seminars dealing with marriage and family issues and preparing individuals for the field of Christian counseling.
He is a graduate of Baptist Bible College and Faith Baptist College and Seminary. He is an ordained minister and licensed member of the Pastoral Medical Association . He is a frequent guest on Vital Issues in the Christian Home, KHCB FM radio, Houston, Texas.
Marlin W. Lance Ph.D.
Dr. Marlin Lance, Ph.D., DCC, DPSc (Diplomat of Pastoral Science) is president of Messiah Method Ministries, Inc., a multi-faceted ministry of seminars dealing with marriage and family issues and preparing individuals for the field of Christian counseling. He is a graduate of Baptist Bible College and Faith Baptist College and Seminary. He is an ordained minister and licensed member of the Pastoral Medical Association . He is a frequent guest on Vital Issues in the Christian Home, KHCB FM radio, Houston, Texas.
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The Messiah Method Counseling System - Marlin W. Lance Ph.D.
Copyright © 2011, 2014 Marlin W. Lance, PhD
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Scripture taken from the King James Version of the Bible.
WestBow Press books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:
WestBow Press
A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan
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www.westbowpress.com
1 (866) 928-1240
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
ISBN: 978-1-4908-3226-5 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4908-3227-2 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-4908-3225-8 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2014905921
WestBow Press rev. date: 4/29/2014
Contents
Foreword
Preface
Chapter 1
The Messiah Method as a Counseling Model
Chapter 2
It Is All About the Story
Chapter 3
Our Story Includes a Journey through the Wilderness
49981.png Study Guide
Chapter 4
Brokenness
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Chapter 5
Bondage
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Chapter 6
Bruising
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Chapter 7
Blindness
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Chapter 8
Blessing
Conclusion
To Further Your Understanding
Appendix
Appendix 1.0
Personal Application Guide—Introduction
Purpose
Commitment
Transparency
Openness
Appendix 2.0
It is all about the Story
2.1 My Experience—Describe Your Personal Life Message
Appendix 3.0
Journey Through the Wilderness
3.1 Types of Heart
3.2 Insights from the Struggles of Moses
3.3 Personal Spiritual Assessment
Appendix 4.0
Power-Life Principle One—Brokenness
4.1 Personal Application—Brokenness
4.2 Personal Application—I Express My Will
4.3 God’s Design for Building a Walk of Faith
4.4 Brokenness—Hebrew and Greek Meaning
4.5 Saul and David
4.6 Brokenness to Bruising
Appendix 5.0
Power-Life Principle Two—Bondage
5.1 Personal Application—I Face My Weights and Sins
5.2 Personal Spiritual Assessment 1—Bondage
5.2.1 18 Steps to Victory Over Bondage
5.2.2 The Believer’s Deliverance Through Jesus Christ
5.3 Sins and Weights
5.3.1 Besetting Sin—Arrogance
5.3.2 Besetting Weights—Addictions
5.3.3 Besetting Weight—Attitudes
5.3.4 Besetting Sin—Actions
5.4 Insight—Bondage
Appendix 6.0
Power-Life Principle Three—Bruising
6.1 The difficulties of life often require help from others.
6.2 We can turn bad experiences into golden opportunities for personal growth.
6.3 The healing of damaged emotions involves confession and prayer.
Appendix 7.0
Power-Life Principle Four—Blindness
7.1 The following words are symptoms of spiritual blindness.
7.2 How would you describe your current attitude towards God?
7.3 Wisdom: Godly or ungodly?
7.4 How to grow in wisdom and knowledge
Appendix 8.0
Power-Life Principle Five—Blessing
8.1 Who you are in Christ?
About the Author
Dedication
This book is lovingly dedicated to my wife Sandra, a true gift from God. My wonderful adult children Ben, for his encouragement and Judith, my hero that gave a kidney to save my life. My editorial team Maria and Sonia. I also wish to thank the entire kidney transplant team at Memorial Hermann Hospital in Houston, TX. May God continue to use you as wonderful healers.
Foreword
A few years ago, when I was living in Houston and working for NASA, I was going through a difficult time. I was having all sorts of relationship and work challenges and was at a point of spiritual and emotional brokenness. Knowing that I needed help and wise counsel I sought the advice of my pastor. I remember sitting in his office and as he listened to my story, he knowingly picked up the phone and said to me, I’ve got the perfect counselor for you.
He spoke into the phone for a few minutes and then handed me the phone. The voice on the other end was immediately comforting. It was Dr. Marlin Lance.
That phone call began a very productive client/counselor relationship where Dr. Lance did indeed help me navigate successfully through my stressful life challenges. But very soon that relationship turned into one of friends and co-workers. At that time Dr. Lance was working on his initial rough draft of his Messiah Method
text and training materials. I attended several of his early seminars, eager to learn more about his concepts for healing. The next thing I knew, he had talked me into joining him in conducting weekend campouts and health retreats for pastors and church elders who were themselves hurting and burned out. I was to find out that this was a particular passion for Dr. Lance (yes, both camping and helping hurting people).
This partnership kicked off what is now many years of teaming up to bring knowledge and wisdom to people regarding God’s design, plans, and instructions for health. Dr. Lance and I have worked together on multiple projects, seminars, retreats, and lectures on Health and Healing. We have researched and explored the powerful connections between Spiritual, Emotional, and Physical health and how they influence one another. While my focus has been on physical health, both to understand God’s design for how our bodies stay healthy as well as the Biblical instructions related to physical health, Dr. Lance has led the way in understanding and teaching God’s plan for recovering emotional and spiritual health. Through Dr. Lance’s work I have come to understand the powerful truth that you cannot have true physical health without the balance of emotional/spiritual health as well.
Dr. Lance truly is gifted as a counselor and teacher. His insight into basic life truths and how to apply them as guiding principles for daily life is refreshing and practical. I remember one situation when I was trying to understand the behavior of a particularly difficult and abrasive patient. Dr. Lance said simply, Well you know, hurting people tend to hurt other people.
It took me a moment to understand the significance of his statement. But when I realized what he was saying to me, that people who are themselves in pain (physical or emotional) are likely to behave in a hurtful manner to those around them, and that the hurtful behavior is not the fault necessarily of the bystander, then I was better able to deal with the difficult patient without taking it personally. I have never forgotten that one lesson (among many) and am reminded of it frequently in my medical practice.
And now Dr. Lance is bringing to you the Messiah Method
. This is his life’s work and his life’s story. It is a profound journey of pain, loss, and struggle that ultimately leads to wisdom and healing for the many people he has helped. It is the revelation of a Biblical pattern that was brought to us by Jesus Christ himself as He showed us the way to recovery. In this book using the Messiah Method, Dr. Lance shows you how to heal relationships with family and friends, with God, and with yourself. While I have had the personal blessing of spending time with Dr. Lance on camping trips, whitewater rafting trips, conferences, and seminars; you now have a similar opportunity to share in his experience and wisdom, and to discover your own pathway to healing through this book.
Enjoy it in good health!
Roger Billica, M.D.
Fort Collins, CO
August 2013
Preface
The idea for this book began as I listened to the frustrating cry of a desperate woman who had spent many months in a mental hospital. She had been brought up in the church as a pastor’s daughter and was a pleasant person. Although I had never met her, I had compassion for her based on what she told me at our first visit. I am desperate for answers, Marlin,
she said. Can you explain to me why I have gone through so much pain and suffering?
She told me a story that was filled with sexual abuse, neglect, and rejection. I felt sad as she recounted several incidents that had torn her apart emotionally and spiritually.
The sexual abuse was committed by her father and other men from her church. She was raped by her father with other men present, and then raped repeatedly by the other men on the same occasion. This occurred virtually every weekend over a period of ten years. This repeated trauma created a hole in her spirit and soul. It had a great impact on her mind and emotions. In an attempt to prevent further occurrences of sexual abuse, she started gaining weight. Her abused body slowly rose to almost 400 pounds. Her emotions were filled with anger, rage, and bitterness. Her bad attitude toward God caused her to reject any spiritual teaching. This lead her to transfer these feelings to each man she met which ultimately caused her to be placed in a mental institution. She was placed on heavy medications to control her mood swings, aggression, homicidal, and suicidal ideation. I realized the trauma therapy would be ineffective as long as she was on medications. Even the medication could not control her rage. She would come to our meetings with a security guard and nurse present. She would pace and curse and spit at me, calling me things that cannot be put into print. She was very nasty. She was a sad figure of what sexual abuse does to the mind and feelings of a woman. The circumstances in her life had ripped the soul out of her marriage and her walk with the Lord.
It took several weeks before she would even listen to me. She continued to test me each time. For six weeks she continued to transfer her anger, rage, and bitterness onto me. Then one day, she came to the gazebo where we had our sessions and she said, I trust you now. Tell me what you think I need to do to feel better.
I asked her if she would allow me to share insights from the Scriptures. She said, Yes.
We scheduled a series of visits to work through her issues. I researched a section of scripture in Luke 4:18-30 and felt it contained some thoughts that would be helpful to her. At the first visit, I read Luke 4:18-19 to her. She received it better than I thought she would. She harbored mistrust toward God because of the abuse she endured from her father. The more we studied the verses, the more the Holy Spirit revealed the truth to her, easing the pain of her hurting heart. She discovered the sexual abuse had broken her spirit, wounded her soul, and corrupted her mind. The damaged emotions of anger and rage became normal for her. Her physical body, because of the obesity, was rebelling against her. She could not control the urges to eat food that was not good for her. Her spiritual life was nonexistent. In her total being, spirit, soul, and body, reflected the broken heartedness Jesus talked about in Luke 4.
She kept reflecting on the words of His mission, I have come with good news for the broken hearted. She wanted to know what was involved in good news. She had to deal with that contradiction. Trauma contradicts our beliefs, values, self-image and view of reality. I had her start a journal to evaluate the contradictions. As she wrote about her experiences, she slowly began to see the impact of trauma upon her life. Meditating upon the Scriptures, her spirit became more open every day.
Something wonderful was taking place in her life. Her enthusiasm for the Lord continued to grow. I will never forget the day when she said, That Bible has some of the most powerful, life changing principles I have ever heard; it is great to know how much God cares for me. I did not enjoy the early part of the process! I am so thankful for what God’s revealed to me. I cannot wait to share it with others.
Before she was discharged from the hospital, I wrote her a love letter from God. I asked her to read it out loud to me. The impact of that letter moved her to a strong emotional release of damaged emotions that had accumulated over the years. Her face was covered with tears as she began to experience, the love, the acceptance, the forgiveness, and the grace of God. She asked if she could give me a hug. I saw a transformation in her life and gave God the glory for what He had accomplished. Before we said goodbye, she asked me to promise I would tell her story before I shared the counseling principles of the Messiah Method. I have told her story to thousands across the world. I fulfilled my promise by telling her story first in this book.
Two years later, I received a phone call from her. She said, Marlin, it is still working! Jesus has changed my life. His method works. My husband and I have started an incest survivors group in our church.
I shared 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 with her, All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. We have plenty of hard times that come from following the Messiah, but no more so than the good times of his healing comfort—we get a full measure of that, too.
The principles I shared with her are in this book. Many men and women, who endured harsh circumstances like she did, have each gone through the Messiah Method and discovered the same thing. The Lord’s Method heals! I have titled this book the Messiah Method to identify the healing process Jesus takes us through as we mature in Him. The Word method denotes process. It touches the innermost parts of our being and continues to work throughout our life as we grow in the Lord. It can be painful at times. In fact, some people get very angry as they do their work. The same thing might happen to you. But let