The Life We Know: Confidence

By C. Lamerichs

'Stick to what you know and let someone else take care of the rest'. The great nation of Concordia prides itself on its harmony, born of dependency. Each zone has its own specialty, all thanks to the trade secrets which are meant to stay within their wall. The citizens are encouraged to stay within that wall as well.

Nicholas Setmore, still aged 29, has grudgingly decided to see more of the world. Accompanied by his best friend, Jesseminah Whitfield, and the questionable eccentric Silvian, he has set out on a journey to rectify the government's mistake and regain the citizenship taken from them. He comes to find very quickly that the Wasteland between habitable zones is not quite what most people believe it to be. As the trio travels towards their goal, they encounter colorful individuals, beautiful sights and some terrible dangers, as revolutionists aim to destroy the laws of Concordia.

The second installment of a series, The Life We Know: Confidence centers on having enough courage to step outside one's comfort zone, as well as taking the time to find beauty in an otherwise unnerving situation.

• Language: English
• Publisher: C. Lamerichs
• Release date: Aug 8, 2018
• ISBN: 9780463550939

C. Lamerichs

Born in the summer of 1988, C. Lamerichs was raised in a rural village in the Netherlands. As far back as she can remember, teachers have accused her of being a loner and a dreamer. Why that was considered to be a bad thing, she still can't say. Nowadays, she still resides in her country of birth, inhabiting a nice house with her three cats. She juggles a full-time factory job with staff duties for the J-POP Foundation (which hosts the largest anime convention of the Netherlands) and of course writing. After more than a decade of dabbling with fanfiction in her spare time, she decided to write an original story as a means of balancing out her monotonous, monochromatic job.When the life you know fails to bring true happiness and instead only leaves you content, it's up to you to take that first step outside your comfort zone, or so she would say.

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Copyright

The Life We Know

Confidence

By C. Lamerichs

Copyright © 2018 by C. Lamerichs.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

ISBN 978-0-4635509-3-9 (EPUB)

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Cover Illustration Copyright © 2018 by Sabrina Kooijmans, Sappig-art.com.

Table of Contents

Omens

Sharing is Caring

The Snake

Noxia

Ghosts of the Past

Noon

Jesseminah’s Story

What Doesn’t Kill

The Fortunate Ones

From the Ashes

Tricks

Growing Up

Crimson Shades

Crepido

The Pass-Along

Something Worth Fighting For

Seraestiva

Initiative

The Doodad

Shadow Market

The Future

Imagination

The Reunion

Radical Action

Rock Bottom

Omens

Cole was dying. He'd never experienced such a thing before, leaving him with no basis for comparison, yet he didn't have a doubt in his mind. Any moment now, his body would give up on him and the flame of life would be snuffed out. Anyone who'd romanticized the concept could suffer their own eternal damnation, in his opinion. There was nothing beautiful nor serene about it. There was no bright light calling him to the other side, nor could he remember times long past. There was only himself, in this moment, forced to endure the white-hot agony of it all. He had regrets, though. There was nothing but a string of bad decisions to lead him to this point.

A low, pitiful moan escaped him as he rolled over onto his side, wrapping his arms around his aching abdomen. Sweat was running down his face and back. His hair, which was usually dry and frizzy, clung to his damp forehead. How he wished to be put out of his misery already.

Cole, can you please stop being so overdramatic? said a voice by his side. Silvian was less than sympathetic to his plight. Expecting any different from him would be a fool's errand. It's only a bit of food poisoning, it's not the end of the world.

If there were anything within reach, Cole would've used the last of his strength to fling it at his supposed companion. 'Only a bit of food poisoning' was easy to say for the person who wasn't suffering through it, and the condescending smile on Silvian's face increased the insult by tenfold. Everything about it was overwhelming, from the nausea that closed his throat to the cramps which attacked his stomach and chest. He felt cold and clammy and disgusting. Heading out into this damned Wasteland had been a mistake.

At the very least, Cole still had one savior of sorts to watch his back. Jess was willing to step in where he couldn't, even if she was less than discreet about it. Just leave him alone, Silly. Picking a fight with him is only going to draw this out even longer.

No one's picking a fight, Silvian insisted, while his tone of voice implied quite the opposite. I'm just asking him to change his tune a bit. He brought it on himself. I told him to wash those veil nuts before eating them and he evidently refused to listen.

"I did what you said. It did nothing to help," Cole snarled at him, raising the cloth of his sleeping bag a bit further up to his chin.

It's not my fault your digestive system's as sheltered as you are. Just look at Jess here. She came from the same zone, has been eating the same things and she's just fine. What does that tell you?

What did that tell Cole? Not too much, in all honesty. While short and plump, Jess was the most physically fit person he'd ever met. In the four years he'd known her, he couldn't remember a single instance of her taking a sick day from work. She'd been sick on rare occasion, of course, only to insist that she wouldn't allow it to get in her way. Jesseminah Whitfield was known to be that sort of person.

... Her stomach must be lined with steel, he ultimately replied, at a lack for a better argument. He would never admit that Silvian had a point.

Jess laughed softly and flopped forward, onto her own sleeping bag. A few locks of pitch-black hair fell over her shoulders, only to be brushed back once more. She pulled her pillow towards herself, resting her folded arms on top of it to make herself more comfortable. Aluminum, perhaps, but not steel, she joked. She was watching Cole with obvious amusement, so he made sure to avert his gaze towards the tent's ceiling instead.

You want to know what I think? Silvian asked him.

No, I do not, Cole said, knowing it wouldn't make so much as a lick of difference. Indeed, it didn't.

Silvian scooted towards him, until his knees were only a few inches away from Cole's hip. A hand found its way to Cole's chest, pressing against it. "What's causing your nausea isn't in here. It's up here, between the ears and behind the nose."

Cole didn't need the finger tapping at his forehead to understand just what Silvian was implying. His frustration mounted and he moved his own hand as if he were swatting away a particularly bothersome fly. Silvian retreated, though he was still grinning.

Don't be daft. I can tell the difference between a genuine stomach ache and an imaginary one, Cole grumbled. I should never have agreed to this journey. At this rate, I will not live to see Clareo.

Silvian tutted loudly, shaking his head. You'll live, trust me. ...And you don't hear the rest of us complaining throughout the day. Maybe you should start looking at the bright side of things instead of focusing on every little frustration that comes your way.

Oh please. There's no bright side to any of this, Cole insisted without so much as a second thought. He was confined to a tent out in the middle of nowhere, he was in pain and this was only the start of it all. A mere five days had passed since they'd left Aqualux and they weren't even close to their destination.

Hm, let's see... Silvian raised a hand to his chin, looking thoughtful in a manner that was nothing more than one big mockery. It's not winter. Better yet- it's still summer, which is one of the most forgiving seasons when it comes to travel. It's not raining, either. The only reason you even got food poisoning was because you had food to eat in the first place. You don't have to sleep in the same tent as someone whose snoring sounds like an earthquake because you are, in fact, the one doing the snoring.

"All right, all right," Cole admitted, hoping to cut Silvian off at that point. Sadly, the man kept going as if he hadn't heard him.

You've got two people by your side to listen to your complaining- and speaking of which, you get to look at my pretty face all day, which I'd consider quite the treat-

Silly! Jess shot into an upright position and made a grab for the man's long braid of dirty blond hair, a disciplinary trick that had yet to fail her. Silvian's cry of pain hadn't gotten old, either. Once she was satisfied, she released him. I told you, picking fights is not helping! Especially if the problem is all in Cole's head.

Much as Cole wanted to reinforce the notion that his sickness was very much physical as opposed to mental, a combination of nausea and a headache robbed him of the strength needed to speak up. As for Silvian, whatever form of protest might've been moving towards his vocal cords, it died in the face of Jess's fierce glare. The man gave up on further discussion, though his defeat wasn't exactly a graceful one. Yet another passive aggressive smile tugged at his lips as he snatched up one of his smaller packs from the floor. If that's how it is, I should just give him his peace of mind altogether. I'm going out for some fresh air.

We weren't supposed to go out on our own! Jess reminded him, but it did nothing to stop Silvian's slow crawl towards the tent's makeshift doorway. That wasn't entirely surprising; Cole had come to learn that Silvian was quite adept at ending conversations with force when they weren't to his liking.

"You two weren't supposed to go out on your own, because you'll just get yourselves in trouble, the man replied curtly, his hand reaching for the flap to push it aside. Fresh air and sunlight came streaming into their little shelter and Cole reflexively hid further inside his sleeping bag, which didn't block out Silvian's continued patronizing remarks one bit. Besides, I can't smoke in here. Homey as the gloom might feel to you Suffitians, it'll just have Cole complaining about the smell. I won't stray too far, so give a holler if you need me."

With that, Silvian removed himself from the tent and Cole found that nothing of value was lost. Unfortunately, 'peace of mind' was still too much to ask for, as Jess continued to make her own presence only too clear.

Why is he always like this? she asked in a loud, exasperated tone of voice. Having more experience with the Wasteland doesn't give him the right to be a jerk about it...

I highly doubt he requires any excuse to be a jerk, Cole mumbled.

Eugh... The worst part is that he's always right. If he were ever wrong about something, I could rub his face in it.

Delightful as that prospect would've been, Cole had to grudgingly admit that Silvian's knowledge was the main reason they'd convinced the man to be their guide at all. They'd brought this upon themselves. In fact, they'd all but begged for it. It'd be best, then, that Silvian were never mistaken about something.

------

It was taking far longer than expected for their third companion to return to the tent. Exactly how long, Cole wouldn't have been able to say, as he'd just started to doze off when there was a discreet shuffling sound nearby. It didn't come from the tent's entrance, meaning it could only be coming from Jess. Cole's hand found the top of the sleeping bag and pushed it down somewhat so he could watch the source of the disturbance. She was pulling a large notepad out of his backpack. When she realized she'd been spotted, she seemed to lose some of her nerve. May I...? she asked him.

Of course, he said. While he was still a bit self-conscious about his collection of drawings, he knew it was something he'd have to grow past. Ultimately, his art was meant to be shared.

Jess settled back down atop her sleeping bag and placed the notepad between the two of them, flipping it open. The first page held a pencil sketch of a fluffy, slender animal. It was a ferret named Satin. A pet, belonging to a woman they'd befriended in Aqualux. Seeing it, he wondered how Clay was doing. She was meant to be taking over Silvian's duties and 'listen' for suspicious activity in his absence, yet she had her own business to look after. Would she have enough time to handle both jobs?

Jess continued to flip the pages. There was a drawing of Clay's bar, The Rushing Spring, the patrons no more than dark silhouettes all huddled together at their respective tables. A shady place like that had been their home for over a week. There was a drawing of Aqualux's streets, with its odd spires of buildings and abundance of gleaming tiles. Next were some sketches of the glittering fountains and canals, adorned with water wheels and bridges. Various shades of blue paint had been used to strengthen some of the illustrations, though that was about as far as Cole had gotten. Blue and white were the only colors he had, so far. He fully intended to add to his collection, should he find something worthy of being mixed into paint.

Jess was smiling down at the landscapes with fondness. I hate to gloat, yet... I did tell you Aqualux would be amazing, didn't I? We should definitely go back there as soon as we're able.

Cole had his doubts when it came to gloating. Jess was exactly the sort of person to do so. Whether her insistence to travel to Aqualux in the first place was something worth praising was debatable. Knowing where it'd led them and how much it had cost them, she should hate to gloat about the matter.

She flipped another page, reaching the first illustration of the Wasteland. A field littered with puddles of water and rare tufts of grass. An elevated strip of concrete weaved through it; a track to guide the public transport to its destination. The wall surrounding Aqualux was but a far-off marking, unable to do its actual size justice. They'd been walking for a day already when Cole drew this. He'd thought they'd crossed an impressive distance already, only for Silvian to undermine it with a single remark. They had quite a long way to go, even now.

Jess paused at the drawing of Fontes Abyssi, the largest lake to be found in all of Concordia. It certainly did its title proud, as Cole had never seen so much water in one place. It'd almost stretched into the horizon. Large pipes could be seen emerging from the lake, disappearing into the ground shortly after. They must've led straight to Aqualux, Cole had guessed. Fontes Abyssi was one of the two main sources of water, the other being the marshes of Noxia. Cole would experience the latter soon enough.

You know, it's a shame we couldn't go for a swim, Jess remarked.

In disgusting water like that? Cole asked in turn. Fontes Abyssi's water underwent a purification process before it was deemed usable and after laying eyes on it, he could see why. It'd been murky and dark, as if it were hiding secrets within its depths. Lethal predators, perhaps. It hadn't smelled too great, either. The only thing to be said in its defense was that Suffitio's canals were still ten times more disgusting.

Silvian said it was fine... Jess trailed off, tapping a finger against the page in an almost restless manner. Then again... That doesn't matter either way, does it?

Indeed, it didn't matter whether the water was 'fine' or not. The grander problem was that neither of them could swim. Suffitians weren't taught, as they'd never have a need to swim. Anyone who was foolish enough to force their way past the fences and tumble into the canals was as good as dead regardless.

Jess continued her way through the pages. There was a sketch of a keen-eyed bird atop the branch of a fallen tree. There was another sketch of a curious long-bodied insect which, through some miracle, was standing on the water's surface of a puddle. There was even a doodle of a small mound of dirt, which Silvian had claimed was created by something called a mole. The notion that there were animals digging their own tunnels had been difficult to believe at first, though the more of the Wasteland Cole had seen, the more he was letting go of what he'd always thought were certainties. This world was full of unbelievable things and full of life, contrary to what he'd always been told.

When Jess reached the last illustration, the small forest that they were in right now, she gave the next blank page a curious stare. Why are there no pictures of Suffitio? You've had plenty of time to draw in the afternoons, when we were resting.

I am saving it for last, was Cole's reply. It was only a small portion of the truth, though. He'd attempted to sketch some of Suffitio, only to fall short when it came to the mental image. He knew that the streets were cobblestone and he knew that the houses were rectangular. He knew that it was dark with smog and he knew that factory chimneys would always tower over the city, yet... In only a few weeks' time, he'd lost all the details. He'd lived there for twenty nine years, yet it'd taken a mere month to become unable to paint a vivid picture of it. ... Once we've regained our citizenship, I will add it to the collection.

Jess smirked widely, snapping the sketchbook shut again. Then, you believe you'll live to see Clareo after all?

We'll see, he huffed, refusing to admit that she'd just successfully cornered him. He'd cultivated something of an immunity to the lurching of his stomach in the past few minutes, though now that Jess had drawn attention to it once more, he was back to feeling miserable. What is Clareo like in terms of appearance? he asked, hoping to continue the distraction of conversation.

Hmm... Well... Do you remember the chandelier that Mr. Reaney had in his lodging? It's a little bit like that.

In what way is Clareo like a lamp? Cole asked in a dry tone of voice, frowning. Now it was even more difficult to picture anything.

It's not really about the lamp, Jess waved a hand, apparently stifling something of a giggle. The shimmery pieces of glass, like crystal, reflecting light around the room... That's what I mean. Clareo has a lot of light and... A lot of windows in the buildings to let that light in. Sometimes an entire wall will be a window.

Is... Is that even safe? Could a burglar not simply toss a brick through that window to gain access? Cole found himself questioning.

Huh... I suppose so. Though... Isn't it the same for windows in every other zone? Aside from that, Clareo is the home of innovation, remember? I get the feeling their glass is made of stronger stuff.

Forced to accept the validity of both those notions, Cole rolled himself onto his back to stare up at the ceiling of the tent. Buildings with a lot of windows still didn't help him picture anything concrete. At the rate they were going now, it could take a month or two before he could see it with his own eyes. Perhaps it was no wonder, then, that Silvian was agitated. Regaining citizenship was the sort of motivation to traveling that could wait, yet Silvian had his own agenda when it came to Clareo. One that could very well save lives. Had it been selfish to ask him for his guidance?

What drew him out of his rumination was a particularly painful sting, as if someone had jammed a long needle into his stomach. He cringed and kicked his legs within the confines of the sleeping bag, wishing he'd be blessed with relief soon. Almost as if drawn towards Cole's misery, Silvian finally returned to the tent.

Jess sounded somewhat peeved when she addressed him, though perhaps she was only covering up her worry. Where have you been? I thought you were only going out for a smoke.

I had to build a quick campfire to boil some water, Silvian replied, a nearby thud indicating he'd settled himself down. Sit up for a minute, will you, Cole? I have something for you.

If there was any prospect that was unappealing right now, it was sitting up. Still, he did as he was told, if only because he was curious. Silvian had moved into a kneeling position right beside him, holding something with both hands. It was one of their mugs. Cole stared down at it, watching the faintest traces of steam take to the air before disappearing. What is that?

It's a sign that this is your lucky day. Silvian grinned, holding the mug out to him. I found some honey thistle, so I used it to make tea. It clears nausea right up.

Cole hesitated for a second, then accepted the mug. The warmth of it was quite a welcome feeling, as was the smell of its contents. It seemed to work wonders on his sinuses as well. Then... You admit that this illness is a physical one?

No, I'm admitting that you're nauseous. That's a symptom, not an illness.

Once again, Silvian was absolutely right. It was somewhat infuriating. Cole glared down at the tea, struck by the realization that even the simplest kind gesture could rub him the wrong way like this. Silvian had gone out of his way to be helpful, despite no one asking him to do so and despite his skepticism. If he could be civil, then why couldn't Cole do the same?

Thank you, he mumbled under his breath, before raising the mug to his mouth to take a careful sip. While bitter at first, an additional taste hit him soon after. Something he couldn't quite describe. It wasn't unpleasant, which was all that mattered in the end.

------

Cole hadn't had a decent night's sleep since they'd left Aqualux. There'd always been something keeping him awake far longer than necessary, be it worries trekking through his head, hunger or even discomfort from the hard ground below. He found that this particular night had set some sort of record. He'd tossed and turned for several hours before his queasiness had subsided far enough for him to doze off, only for it to start raining. The noise it made was unbelievable. Droplets rapped against the top of the tent and the branches of nearby trees, accompanied by gusts of wind just firm enough to shake their surroundings. A distant rumble told him that thunder soiled the sky further.

That their tent was still standing struck him as nothing short of a miracle. That his two companions appeared to be fast asleep throughout it all was baffling in its own way, though, perhaps they were stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the disturbance. It was hard to say, as they were both quiet sleepers. Jess liked to lie on her side and curl herself up while in slumber, Cole had noticed, while Silvian was usually either lying on his stomach or facing away from the rest of them.

All through the night and into the morning, the rain clattered away. In the end, Cole had gotten a semblance of very light sleep, perhaps three hours in total. He would've been content to continue his sleep well into the day, were it allowed. It wasn't. No matter how hard he struggled to hold onto his dreams and remain immersed within them, the fight was over when Jess began to shake him.

"Cole! Cole, wake up, you have to see this! Wake up!" she was yelling down at him.

Mggh... He attempted to squirm himself out of Jess's grip. Unfortunately, she proved to be stronger than him, as always. She pulled him into a sitting position even as his mind struggled to process all the information necessary for being awake.

Hurry! Come outside! Jess released him and less than five seconds later, a coat had been tossed into his lap. "You're going to miss it!

A bleary stare was thrown towards the tent's makeshift open doorway, beyond which a haze of droplets was visible. He blinked, rubbed at his eyes, then tried again. The haze remained. ... It's raining, he stated bluntly.

"I know, I know!" The excitement in Jess's voice felt very misplaced, considering what she was confirming.

The moment Cole had moved out of the sleeping bag and pulled his coat over his nightwear, Jess handed him his boots. She hurried him all the way out the tent and into the chilly, damp air. Despite the continued rain, the sky was beginning to clear in the distance, gray clouds moving along to make way for blue. Streams of sunlight were already visible from higher up in the sky. What time was it?

Jess grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him along, towards the edge of their little cluster of trees. Silvian was already standing there, fully dressed, yet Cole didn't spare him so much as a second glance, for he could see it now. It was right before them, arching over the horizon as if it were some sort of hallucination. A mirage; a beautiful spectacle that only nature could produce.

A rainbow...! he gasped as he stopped dead in his tracks

"A rainbow! Jess echoed, delighted and somewhat breathless. A real, one of a kind, beautiful rainbow."

Cole's eyes swerved back and forth along the arch, attempting to take in the colors. They were all there; from violet to blue to green... The yellow was especially vivid, the orange nearly overtaken by fading red. I... I can't believe it.

Sometimes, I forget how much you missed out on in Suffitio, Silvian remarked from nearby. Rainbows are a good omen. Going your whole life without seeing one... Well, that says a lot about being stuck in your dark enclosure, doesn't it?

Cole ignored him. He refused to allow such patronizing remarks to sour the moment. This rainbow would disappear eventually and depending on weather conditions for the upcoming weeks, he might never see one again. It was true that being confined to one zone ensured a citizen would miss out on certain things. Once they finished their journey, if all went well, they'd be confined once more. That was all the more reason to enjoy the sights while they lasted.

---------------------------------

Sharing is Caring

The bottom of the box of Cole's oatmeal was becoming visible. It wasn't surprising, as dry oatmeal was all he'd been able to stomach during his period of illness. He didn't mourn the progress he'd made on his supply, either. His health had improved over the course of the night and with no milk to add to it, oatmeal had lost its appeal fast. Thankfully, Silvian had prepared some more of that tea from before, which allowed Cole to wash it all down. All he could do now was hope they'd have a nicer breakfast tomorrow.

A pleasant breeze was wafting through the tent, along with a beam of sunlight. The oddest calm was reigning, as if the sight of the rainbow had somehow unified the three of them. It wasn't meant to last, though. Once Jess had finished her own tea, she appeared to have gone on the prowl.

Hey Silly? she asked. Her tone of voice was innocent. So innocent, even, that Cole found it suspicious. He looked up to see that she was crossing her legs, watching Silvian intently. Who is this Otto person, anyway?

On the surface, the question didn't seem to have bothered Silvian at all. The man looked just as carefree as ever. Still, Cole knew exactly where to search for hints that would betray him. A twitch of the eyebrows, mild clenching of the jaw, the right index finger curling inward... Oh yes, Silvian was bothered. Personal questions were always a touchy subject, somehow. It was exactly why Cole had stopped asking- for now, at least. He took a sip of his tea, acting just as aloof about the conversation as their former Sneak companion liked to do.

What do you mean, who is he? Silvian asked pleasantly.

I mean... Apparently he's someone who's supporting the radicals. He sounds really shady. Yet, from the way you were talking... You know him, don't you?

Cole could tell from the look on Jess's face that she'd been bursting to ask this question for a while now. He couldn't blame her. While he'd wondered the same thing, he'd opted not to voice it out loud. He rather wanted to stay on Silvian's good side, lest he leave them to die out here. At the very least, it sounded like less of an accusation coming from Jess.

Oh, I know him, Silvian said, still the poster boy for nonchalance. And before you ask, I'm sure your first guess on the context would be correct.

You've worked with him? was Cole's first guess. It was the most logical reason for one shady person to know another shady person.

"I've dealt with him, Silvian stated. Cole didn't think it was all that much of a difference, yet it must've been significant or he wouldn't have been corrected. I know how to deal with him, which is exactly why I'm going up to talk to him again."

He's enlisted your 'services' in the past, then? Cole asked. Silvian might not have been a radical himself, yet he'd made it clear he was a supporter of change. 'Revolution'. As a Sneak, Silvian had stolen trade secrets from a specific zone to sell off at least once. Otto struck Cole as exactly the sort of person who would take those secrets off his thieving hands.

Silvian immediately slapped a hand to his mouth, which didn't exactly prevent him from talking. Ooh, you saw an opportunity and swooped right in, didn't you? Once a Defender, always a Defender.

No. I was only asking for the sake of conversation, Cole grumbled, though it was a bit of a lie. He wasn't certain what the exact reason was. All he knew was that he wasn't a Deaf anymore. To be accused of any kind of lingering association was rather insulting.

I've told you before, I can't say anything about employers, Silvian continued. I've still got some professional integrity left, you know.

Cole squinted at him over the rim of his tea mug. This supposed retirement from the Sneak trade was extremely hard to believe in the face of such a blatant refusal to stop hoarding information about it. Still, he could read between the lines. Are you not confirming it for us simply by refusing to deny the possibility?

"I don't know. Is that what I'm doing? Silvian lowered his hand again, revealing a toothy smile. Maybe I was already one step ahead of you, knowing you would jump to that assumption."

Jess was chuckling from across the tent, which Cole took as his signal to call it quits and return to his tea. There was no reasoning with Silvian while he was like this. He might never get the answers that would explain what'd happened five years ago, when information had been stolen from Suffitio.

Silvian shrugged his shoulders lightly. Either way, it's nothing for you to worry about. You two won't get to meet him.

W-What? But... We're all in this together, remember? We made a pact! Jess argued, smacking her fists down into her lap.

I never said our little pact includes my personal business. I said I'd take you two to Clareo and that's where it ends, Silvian pointed out. Besides, you agreed to do as I tell you, so now I'm telling you. Once we reach our destination, you can do your thing and I'll do mine.

At this point, Cole had hardly expected anything different from Silvian. That Jess was offended by the notion only proved she was a bit too trusting. Naive, even. "That's just... just stupid!" she declared.

"It's for your own good. I can't help that you know about Otto, but Otto can't know that you know about him, understand? Radicals get antsy when complete strangers find out that they're radicals," Silvian explained.

I... I suppose that makes sense, Jess replied, though she didn't sound entirely certain about it. She raised a hand to run it through her hair, an expression of concern dawning. ... Will you be all right by yourself?

It was interesting just how conflicting a question could be. When they'd first met Silvian as he was now, less than a month ago, Cole had wanted to see him dead. Jess had only wanted to see him brought to justice, which in terms of their legal system would result in the same thing. Silvian had been nothing but an irritating, condescending pest, and yet... They were concerned for him. It was a fair trade, as he seemed to be genuinely concerned for them in turn; the tea in Cole's hands added credibility to that notion.

Not that Silvian appeared to be worried for the future. Quite the opposite. He smiled and hung his head. Sure. I can't say he's a reasonable person, but he'll listen to reason if it's worth his while.

Then... How will you convince him to stop supporting the radicals? Bribe him...? Jess asked.

I have my ways, was Silvian's cryptic reply. Moving on to more present-day matters... How are you feeling, Cole? Are your insides done throwing a tantrum?

There were many things about this turn of events that Cole couldn't appreciate. The wording of the question was one of them. That he was being used as a convenient topic change was another. Worst of all, perhaps, was Silvian's smile and how uncomfortable it made him feel. He promptly turned his attention to his tea,