Mirror Man: A Life of Entropy

By Ronald A.Fenn

The book is a compilation of short vignettes describing certain seen observations from the point of view of one living in an unreal environment and unreal reality except for sometimes far too much of both. It tries to explain through a mental split of thinking the disorder of being black and white on a red and white flag which the flag of Nigeria was used to make a new flag for a young nation at peace. Some of the book is autobiographical and some more involved in detailed analysis of control by technology and the human animal Man. It may seem to be rather complex and hard to read but one must understand I wrote the book in a psychiatric hospital being brainwashed to get back on my feet again. It spans a life time of observation in the nation of Canada as seen through an african who is white blinded by so many mindsets about colour and race and origins. Leaving everything behind that was most precious in Africa I have had to live this nation s reality as my own sight seen or unseen often misplaced or taken for granted or isolated and or used and abused.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jul 20, 2011
• ISBN: 9781463404390

Ronald A.Fenn

I have lived under the control of a powerful dark force in the world having been given a gift for peace and freedom for all people by my father and a prime minister. Technology has played a substantial part in a dystopic world for me under brainwashed techniques and other forms of abuse including LSD without knowledge from ordinary people making me a victim of so many things including my blood from my ninth birthday on the flag of a free nation of Canada. I was born in Nigeria in 1953 close to the equator but have spent most of my life in a cold harsh climate relegated to me by my father and mother after the terrible consequences of my ninth birthday. I have not seen the world since I was a child when I saw alot of it with The Prince of Wales as a boyhood friend. For the last 40 years I have honoured my father and my mother mindless to the reality of a cruel impoverished life with so much potential for peace and the obstruction of justice and many victims lives I have known over the time I have been incarcerated in Canadian institutions often with no hope at all just the control over me by the government of Canada. Being from Africa the saddest reality is the rampant discrimination against my privlleged birthplace I had to abandon in danger to come to this new land of snow and cold and bigness. Every day is a circle of an eternity that belonged to me in my childhood coming around to meet itself at the end of each day with no beginning and no end to Time for most of my life. I have never had a proper home or a proper source for income. I am like the african child whose daily life is seemingly threatened by extinction in such utter abandonment and endangerment even though for all intents and purposes I am protected by the government of the nation. Most of the time, in fact all of the time since I was 13 I hardly or never knew my own huge importance or the power within me because no one ever showed me, not even my father or mother assuming all my life that I already knew a lot more than it seemed I really did to my younger brother also a part of the prime minister at the time s aquisition on the flag but who never even knew himself only that I was more important than he was. The rest of my life I hope to be able to document more readily my profound accomplishments through technology in the world and the progresss sight unseen that has grown and become a profit making market place as Canada is by me alone with nothing but too much of everything to not be abused by my own powers in hospitals for every reason under the sun that is not good or true as my heart really is as true as it could ever be deep down and also on the surface. I live in Kingston , Ontario where I have lived homeless or in hospital without a shred of personal hope giving myself to humanity without thinking much of hatred or jealousy for the last nearly 30 years. I am the focus of everything real and unreal in all the world since I came to Canada after my ninth birthday in1962.

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© 2011 by Ronald A. Fenn. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 06/20/2011

ISBN: 978-1-4634-0437-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4634-0438-3 (dj)

ISBN: 978-1-4634-0439-0 (ebk)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011907069

Printed in the United States of America

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

This book is printed on acid-free paper.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

Chapter 1 The Sparrow and The Wolf

WISHING ON THE STAR THAT IS THE SUNTRUE LOVE CAN NEVER EVER DIE

AFRICA SCREAMS

THE ALIENS

ALL HELL BREAKING LOOSE

THERE’LL ALWAYS BE AN ENGLAND

OUTER SPACE (ANDROGENOUS)

ARMAGEDDON 11

MOST UNKIND BARBARIAN VAMPIRES OF THE NORTHERN STARS

I HAVE NEVER HAD A HOME SINCE I LOST EVERYTHING AS A BOY

ONSLAUGHT OF CREATURES FROM OUTER SPACE WHILE I AM FOREVER TRAPPED IN TIME AT AFRICA’S GOVERNMENT HOUSE

THE BLINKING OF AN EYE

BOB DYLAN—THE MEMORIAL CENTRE-KINGSTON

BREAKING THE CHAIN

FACTS ABOUT MY BRITISH ENDANGERMENT

BUGS

Chapter 2 Many Strings Attached

REFLEX SACRIFICE FOR THE PUSH OF A BUTTON

CANADA WAS AND IS GOD

CARS

CLEANSED BY FIRE AND FREE OF PHYSICAL SYMBIOSIS BY FORCE OF WILL AND OPPRESSION BY ALL CANADA

THE COLOUR OF MONEY

CONDUIT FOR MANY

I WHO HAS NOTHING

DARK ENERGY AND A TINY PINPRICK OF LIGHT

MY FATHER’S DEATHBED

MORE FROM WILLIAM BLAKE

NIGHTMARE OF THE DOLPHIN

TWO FACES OF THE MOON

EXPECTATIONS OF CANADA WHILE CRUCIFIED

BEFORE THE MAPLE LEAF

THE HOLY GHOST OF SIR JOHN A. MACDONALD

GOD AND TECHNOLOGY

I AM THE GOVERNMENT OF CANADA BUT I RUN BY ITS MACHINE

GROTESQUE MINDS

A CROUNDHOG AND AN ABUSED ANIMAL

Chapter 3 Without Substance

OPEN FACED SANDWICH

I AM AFRICA IN CHAINS

IN AN AFRICAN BATHTUB

EVERYTHING IN MY OWN LIFE

INFINITE WORDS OF WISDOM

INFINTELY MORE WORDS

THE AGE OF INFORMATION

THE OUTERNESS OF INNER SPACE

THE INVISIBILITY OF Pi

THE RED LAUREL LEAF OF JEALOUSY AND THE AGE OF STUPID

JESUS

SUSPENSION OF DEATH

JUDGED BY THE DEVIL FOREVER

THE LITHIUM BUNNY

FACES OF THE ENEMY LOVING A MAPLE LEAF LOVING A PRINCE

LSD WITHOUT KNOWLEDGE IN CANADA

THE MIRROR MAN OF SHIT

MORE POETRY FROM OLD ENGLAND

Chapter 3 A Monkey In The Middle

IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH

THE MOST HIGH AND THE MOST HOLY

MR. WILSON THE VOLLEYBALL (SUBHUMAN—PLUTO)

A LONELY FILTHY SEWER RAT

Chapt 4 The Iris of The World

IT IS NOT MY WILL I WILL

NIGGER ON THE FLAG OF CANADA

THE KNOWING OF NOTHING

THE LAND OF HARSH BLINDNESS

THE POWER OF ONE

ONE WITH ALL THE LAND

CHAINS ON PARADISE LOST(FAR AWAY ANOTHER UNIVESE)

STRANGER TO MYSELF

EVERYWHERE… PIGS IN SPACE

PIRAHNAS AND VOICES

THE CHAINS OF LOVE(AGAINST THE BLACK STALLION)

POSSESSION IS NINE TENTHS OF THE BLOODY LAW

THE ANNONYMITY OF AFRICA FOR PROFIT AND GAIN AS A ‘BLACK’ MAPLE LEAF

THE MURDER OF THE KING BY PROTOCOL AND THE OFFICIAL SECRETS ACT

NO ONE CAN SEE FOR LOOKING EXCEPT THE TRUE AFRICAN CAN

A PSYCHOTIC REACTION TO BEING ‘RAILROADED’ BY GOD AND CONTROL WITH A VERY SORRY ASSHOLE

OWNERSHIP OF A RED BADGE OF COURAGE

THE CONTROL AND USE OF RON WHO IS REALLY RONNIE

OPPRESSION AND MIND CONTROL BY SATELLITES THE NEED FOR RESPIRIDONE INJECTIONS

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 28TH FIRST CANADIAN SATELLITE 1962

BECAUSE THE WORLD IS ROUND

SEEING DOUBLE ON THE FLAG OF CANADA

SEEING HEAVEN WITH MY OWN GREEN EYES

HOW DOES A VERY SICK SEAGULL FIGHT BACK?

SOLITAIRE’S THE ONLY GAME IN TOWN

THE SOLITUDE OF BLOOD

SPLITTING THE ATOM

DOUBLES SQUASH

THROUGH THE QUAGMIRE OF INJUSTICES

THE STARS OF THE SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE

STOLEN LAND AND SOUL

THE GRIM REALITY OF SUPERCOMPUTERS

TAKEN FOR GRANTED

MAGNETO AND TITANIUM MAN

THE TENDER REED

THE EYES HAVE IT

I ALONE BEAR THE CURSE

WANTING THE LIGHT BACK FOR ME!!!

MESSAGES FROM GOD AS ‘LETRANGER’

Chapter 5 The Stars Are Mirrors

THEFT FROM ‘THE BLACK HOLE’

SO ABUSED FOR HAVING THIS FACE

THE TOMB OF DARKNESS

VOODOO AND ME AND GILES

PERSONAL WAR ON TERROR

WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?

A TIGER’S EYE—THE COLOUR OF CANADIAN MONEY

WINTER AFTER AFRICA

JOURNEY TO THE EDGE OF TIME

SKATING AND HOCKEY IN TORONTO(1967)

ONE SINGLE SHOW OF HUMANITY

WINTER

SOMEWHERE BETWEEN A WOLF AND THE LIGHTNING OF GOD

WORLD PEACE AHD ME

ALL THE PATIENTS ARE ZEBRAS

Chapter 1

The Sparrow and The Wolf

WISHING ON THE STAR THAT IS THE SUN

TRUE LOVE CAN NEVER EVER DIE

‘And now the purple haze of twilight time,

Steals across the meadows of my heart,

High up in the sky the little stars climb,

Always reminding me we far apart,

You wander down the lane and far away,

Leaving me a song that will not die,

Love is just the stardust of yesterday

The music of the years gone by…’

My friend who believed so much in my happiness, Nat king Cole died after he wrote this on the day my brother and I were placed side by side on a red and white flag of an emerging nation… Canada. I have been a prisoner ever since of government house in Africa where he has never stopped fighting and kicking a silent scream within me to somehow remember the Wonders of the World somehow, through the dark and gloomy nights of perpetuity and pain and perpetual motion to be so abused by so many in my brother’s nature within me now barely alive thank God but everywhere I look in the faces of the ones he has killed too at government house in Nigeria, a flag of a nation I was made into to for green ‘peepers’ and white skin of a boy known as ronnie by the warm hearted blacks and Europeans who knew me and knew my father’s work for The Queen.

I must take a pill to ease the anguish of a lifetime of tortures and force of mind on me to beoome the mind for the whole world now this date of our Lord… December 7, 2010… 37 years of following the sun with Charles at my side alone in misery never anything but being abused and damaged by Giles at government house, fathering children in Charles’ name even because I had arrived at my place of beginning but only on a star called the sun, a dream if you will.It guided me here 25 years ago because this place meant everything about Giles and what he is capable of doing to please his father, not God but dad. I was lost as I am now in a crowd of faces forever used to find my destination in the sun as now I set all controls for the heart of it with my voice being the only one heard out under all the other stars, the unpure ones watching, listening to the word spoken of a boy’s dream who has seen the great pyramids and walked in the sand of Cairo, and run across the Great Wall of China playing tag with my only real ache of a soul I ever had that I lost to hell and it is a freezing cold place of cold stone and cold hearts and clever people calling me ‘poor devil’ or ‘what a freak’ or ‘stupid goof’ all words that should never be heard by a sensitive boy living on a dream for them all and for me and for the finest friend I ever had known who did so wrong when he forced himself to end a love that will and can never die.

AFRICA SCREAMS

‘The lord thy God is a jealous vengeful God’ . . . the same could be said for the family of Man as well. When I think about Africa and simply always always wanting to go home I am reminded of the song lyric…

‘I just want to fly away,

I don’t know where my home is

I don’t know where my soul is…’

When I think only sad things about my home and the terrible losses of its realm as Mother Africa the sky cries rain or it snows or it lightnings and thunders. And then the verbal beatings take place inside this dark stormy isolation ward of me and Africa. ‘And the dead shall walk the earth’ while the abused African child is impeded to Heaven knows what extent after so much abuse already in the name of a sunny bright cheerful God from Africa within the confines of these dark walls for so long that have reduced to me to a paper thin body, nearly dead, living without hope but firmly renouncing futility even though Africa’s death seems psychologically imminent by the misery and poverty the family of Man has brought in the name of Giles, the truest living zombie to ever take on animation and exude a civilized arrogant sharp toothy smile delighting in his existence he has chosen to live in my bright sunny African God’s name killing me until there is nothing but a pain wracked used up diseased numbed feelingless body with a soul for a memory of a continent I was once so proud to belong to in the name of the Queen and my green eyes and white skin.

The child is smart who is sunny but the world denies him his true origins and murders him in the name of all that is sacrosanct to evil dark jealousy of the Family of Man taking away his innocence with the complexities of practical forced labour in the name not of the bright cheerful smile of an African sun but relentless political strife imprisoned in chains to be whipped and forced to build a temple to Baal in Jesus’ name in a land not of warm smiles and sunny beaches but dull minded whites who only want to tear down the true God in Jesus’ name and sacrifice the true God of Israel to the powers of darkness and a chemical and manipulated politically engineered living death with no hope of recovery from… true recovery for a fish that has been out of water its whole life to be pounded into ribbons by ‘fishermen’ making the abused child of Africa become a God without a Heaven, a kingdom with no gates or moat, a wealth plundered in the name of a dark Jesus named Giles. In bondage to this God of ‘palestine’ I have been beaten and flogged even by those who befriended me in Jesus’ name along the jungle path to the density of thick gatherings of flies and mosquitos and much disease and sickness nearly fatal many times to sold into slavery riding in taxis like the tall ships that transported the slaves to the New World… now the ships are lost between the old and the new , the child is always father to the Family of Man even though he has no currency or credentials or anything tangible except all pinning him down with their tangibility or their God which is never the true God of Israel as I have known him to be in Africa. Perhaps that is why he is made ashamed as an abused child from Africa for not believing in the God of the Family of Man as they all are to me now everyone who is in my face or in my ‘area’. It is all held togather by string and glue, crazy glue to make the child crazy and a puppet of evil and darkness for which he is forced to address to strangers he doesn’t even really like or never did like as friends and brothers. It is a line from the Old Testament that says,’ A righteous man gets knocked down seven times but he rises again’. Such is my existence and may I say I have personally lost all to standing up to the true God of Baal as an african boy abused and as a jew alone always miserable and out of place always alone and unsafe and always as never ever before true.

ALIEN ANT FARM

Objects In The Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear

‘Day after day I must face the world a stranger

Where I don’t belong… I’m not that strong…’

‘I love you, love you love you all

More than life, more than life

More than anybody else…’

‘I got an ocean pearl, I got an open world’

Well I don’t have an open world anymore after so much grief and feeling wretchedly proud of my ‘self’.Everything has been a sacrifice to everyone else and I see myself as a creature forever also me now having taken and forgotten all the insight I had gained as a youth institutionalized by so much for so little but a faded whisper of a silent voice seemingly gone with the wind making me The Robot King of all the others but unable to be… human and even defend myself against the onslaught of a constant constant barrage of the alien ant farm everywhere now and by incest no one knows anyone anymore except as a goatish act of indecent sexual manhood and womanhood, something I never was on a par with ever especially since it was with only the control over me and on my heart by Giles raping me forever and murdering me so long ago only held together by shades of my mother and father’s eternal fires of the eternity I guess was more than real to me in Africa. Gammma rays and alpha waves from television and radio bombard the clients all giving them more ‘soma’ and more ‘juice’ either to have delusions or else abuse the abused… me. I had to practically become Alexander the Great deluded by my own importance yet seemingly a piece of shit to everyone in contact with on face value by the microchips of Canada in my green eyes… sometimes seeing double and sometimes bleary from too much enchanted booze as a boy fighting to get rid of and out of the ‘box’ of squash courts and schoolrooms surrounded by the vampires of the voices of any particular time still torturing me in a way not one human being could ever call realistic or even sensible because I am not delusional… I am forced to be sane in a box of adult poisoning chocolates of discretion being the better part of a murderous valour on the maple leaf seen as a totem pole to be axed down by the white man’s burden to hismelf of me like a thorn in the side disseminated into a million thorns in MY side thanks to being murdered by Giles the African unbaptized black baboon of Canada. Hell in jesus’ name as a child toto given too much power to even comprehend mentally if only by a voice from ‘somewhere’ in a wilderness of desecrated eternities and losses too great to bear ‘as a man who is worth his salt’ should do… right!! As if that in itself is not just another fatherly government expectation!! Yet being everything as a boy in a box makes me feel Giles humiliating me while he fucks me like that in the presence of good people meaning well but only belittling a beaten child from Africa.

THE ALIENS

I came to Kingston only to draw a positive charge from the lightning of my 13th year when I was first indoctrinated as the maple leaf… a positive charge from Africa. It was my last resort and the negative charge of the place left me drained as it does now because all stole the lightning from my eyes including the powers that wanted to destroy it like Alfred O’Rourke.

My mother knew alot of the universe reading Stephen Hawkings and being a loyal member of the London Observatory. She knew when she took me to see how excited I might be at all considering the negative drain of the drugs on my mind and positive charge to the movie ‘Cocoon’. I was very excited but just for a short while because Africa’s storms and lightning and open skies had been so reduced by then.

I live for eternity’s sake. I exist to give lightning away from loving eyes to the world be they used with a negative charge as in rock music or be used as a positive charge in the study of quantum physics.I have no age or time restriction and if I died hopefully not violently I would be content because I would not die at all.

The world lives on electricity charges from my body and mind through the powers of the microchip in my neck.When I came here I carried two chips of both negative and positive and it only got alot worser and worser trying to gain a foothold or a beachhead on positve light from Africa.The sun is a lot sharper now thank the Lord since I don’t feel so restricted by the negativity of Africa anymore but the negativity is everywhere now and the world might as well be a black hole for me to sit in and ‘dwell’ with no positive way to ascertain my own right to my own ‘lightning’ which my mother gave me through her eyes back and forth with mine to inspire me and keep me going no matter what even though I didn’t even know why or what or how or where all my life because of her sudden rocket ship to space when I was 12 and the unreal world it created after I was struck with lightning twice.

The aliens bring the lightning through the powers of God from my home in Africa.It was shown several times on several different occasions to me here in the past few years all on the time my ‘alien’ parents died and the time they landed in Lagos and the time I was first hit by lightning all on Victoria Day. It’s all about the lightning… all these patients have procesed and used that light in positive or negative ways to be used either against God or for Him. This has been not easy to see for decades as Africa was almost a forgotten fact to me in all the negativity of Toronto and all the many insane places I have given away electricity or else tried to gain it back either with girls or with games like squash where I could focus the energy. It was artificial however and Africa still was a mystery as was the maple leaf to me.

The aliens are only a blink of an eye away from us.Take my word for I have blinked to see them zoom down to earth as fast as lightning which they need me to bring power to the universe and to earth including the negative charges of it too. I am the most blessed and most loved in the universe but on earth I am practically evil and degenerate and useless to the workings on the floors of hospitals or with impatient patients or with anyone who is of the opinion they know more than I do. Could a gentle spirit of electricty and non violence not be bombarded with negative energy in an insane fashion if he did not remember the love of my ‘alien’ parents to me in Africa? It has been neutralized here by meds confounding my mind to negative influences when positive charges of energy and light from hearts that love God and minds too, so that I am derelict commodity number one for the doctors to ponder and the world to ponder too. I am in effect crucified by the neutron effect of positive and negative charges from Africa. Giles is always been the negative charge and I have always been the positive one whether it be misconstrued as negative no longer matters especially now to the loving powers of God and his many ‘angels’.

Recently NASA space shuttle observed six light beings over Africa during a lightnng and thunder storm. It was documented and the astronomical world was very excited. They draw from the energy to give me power and of course Giles too. My father was neutral about us both all our lives seeing us both as the arms and legs of the parent. His alien presence seemed to go into shock waves of negative and positive charges at the very same time they came down around Victoria Day. That is why I never really knew except by a voice on radio anything real or logical to MY mind say from The Beatles ‘Abbey Road’ album and nothing much was ever objectively known about the microchips outside of the lightning in my face and body.

ALL HELL BREAKING LOOSE

In Canada the violence between Giles and me went seemingly into psychological warfare between him and me with me on the losing end of the stick most of my life probably for as long as I have lived here, 48 years of government control, probably a good thing for Mankind but bad for me personally.

In Africa at government house in Ibadan in Nigeria as we grew so did the jealousy of Giles and me between each other vying for our mother’s attention, both sucking out thumbs long up until we left Africa and Canadians would probably call us ‘sucks’ or ‘crybabies’ like they did me but never him even thougn he took tantrums like me all the time growing up when we both didn’t get our own way as one to another. My mother often smacked us in the head or dad would spank us periodically if we got a little too rebellious with our lives together.

As time went on and we were potty trained and speaking with an english tongue amongst the Europeans or the blacks, we started to want our territorial gain over each other. Fighting broke out between us alot sparked by anger and sometimes hatefulness towards each other. We played together too but our tempers often flared between us jealous of the love of our mother mostly and wanting more love from her to appease one over the other. We yelled and punched and hit and screamed and fought and once Giles fired an arrow right at my green eyes and hit just above the eyebrow nearly taking out my eye. The mark is still there to this day even though it is small and barely visible. My father hammered a partition of plywood and chicken wire between the two of our beds in the large bedroom on top of the living room and verandah hoping that would ease the slaughter. But we still went on fighting although punishment became more severe with being locked up in a room for the whole afternoon unable to use a bathroom or do anything but be dad’s prisoners caught in the act. Once I put a pillow around my face and then leered at Giles in his bed up close and personal and he started to cry and bawl and scream. In the wading pool I would run this way and that trying to ignore his ‘mind’ and the thing I thought he was