Uncle John's Facts to Go Modern Mythology

By Bathroom Readers' Institute

Myth meets reality in this one-of-a-kind book that could only come from everyone’s favorite folk hero—Uncle John!

The ancient Greeks had Zeus; today we have the Burger King…king. In Modern Mythology, you’ll meet the world’s most fascinating heroes, villains, and corporate spokesthingies. Featuring Bathroom Reader classics plus a few new treasures, you’ll discover truths and untruths, and learn the real stories behind some of today’s tallest tales. So sit back and let Uncle John take you on an epic journey of modern make-believe! Immerse yourself in…

 

• Gnomes in the gnews
• The Whopperknocker, Whirling Whumpus, and other cousins of Sasquatch
• Ronald McDonald’s relentless rise to the top
• On tour with Paul Bunyan
• 5 Movies that mythed the point
• Who was Kilroy, and why was he here?
• Common misconceptions that refuse to go away
• Urban Legends that turned out to be true
• The secret of the Loch Ness Monster finally explained

 …and much, much more!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Portable Press
• Release date: Mar 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9781626862319

Bathroom Readers' Institute

The Bathroom Readers' Institute is a tight-knit group of loyal and skilled writers, researchers, and editors who have been working as a team for years. The BRI understands the habits of a very special market—Throne Sitters—and devotes itself to providing amazing facts and conversation pieces.

Book preview

COMIC BOOK HEROES

We begin this e-tome with the humble beginnings of the 20th century’s three most enduring men in tights.

SUPERMAN (1938)

The Man of Steel was created as a direct result of writer Jerry Siegel’s attempts to meet girls when he was a young man. I had crushes on several attractive girls, who either didn’t know I existed or didn’t care, he once explained. It occurred to me: What if I was real terrific? What if I had something special going for me, like jumping over buildings or throwing cars around? Then maybe they would notice me.

• Siegel and co-writer Joe Shuster named their character after movie actors Clark Gable and Kent Taylor.

• Superman’s hometown was named after the science-fiction movie Metropolis.

• Lois Lane was inspired by a woman named Lois Amster, whom Shuster had a crush on when he was in school.

BATMAN (1939)

Bob Kane was a fan of the 1926 movie The Bat, which featured a villain who wore a batlike costume. He also liked to read Sherlock Holmes mysteries. In 1939, Kane combined the two and came up with the Caped Crusader. Twelve issues later, Kane decided to give Batman a sidekick—one that he conceived as a fighting young daredevil who scoffs at danger. Both the name and the costume were adaptations of the legendary English hero Robin Hood. Catwoman was based on the beautiful movie star Jean Harlow, and the Penguin was actually inspired by a character in a cigarette ad.

SPIDER-MAN (1962)

In the early 1960s, Marvel Comics published a comic book called Amazing Fantasy. But after issue number ten, Stan Lee recalls, the sales began to run out of steam…so it was decided that the fifteenth issue would be the final one. This gave Lee the chance to experiment. For quite a while, he writes, I’d been toying with the idea of doing a strip that would break all the rules. A strip that would actually feature a teenager as the star. A strip in which the main character would lose out as often as he’d win—in fact, more often. Because Lee had a free hand to do what he wanted in the last issue of Amazing Fantasy, he used it to introduce his anti-superhero—Spider-Man. A few weeks after its publication, sales reports came back. The issue had been a best-seller! That prompted a brand-new monthly comic…The Amazing Spider-Man.

Most watched film in history: The Wizard of Oz. More than a billion people have seen it.

MYTH-CONCEPTIONS

"Common knowledge" is frequently wrong. Here are some examples of things that people believe, but according to our sources, just aren’t true.

Myth: There are no straight lines in nature.

Fact: Sure there are. Hundreds, in fact, most notably in crystal formations and snowflake patterns.

Myth: Don’t read in dim light—you’ll hurt your eyes.

Fact: According to the American Academy of Ophthalmology, while reading in good light makes reading easier and limits eye strain, using poor light causes no permanent eye damage.

Myth: There are hundreds of different words in the Eskimo language that mean snow.

Fact: First of all, there is no Eskimo language, because there is no one group of people called Eskimos. The word misleadingly refers to dozens of tribal groups living in the northern parts of North America. Most speak different languages, and they typically have less than a dozen words that mean snow.

Myth: Monkeys and apes groom each other by picking off fleas and ticks. And then they eat them.

Fact: They’re actually removing dead skin (but they do eat it).

Myth: More suicides occur during the Christmas season than at any other time of year.

Fact: Suicides are pretty evenly dispersed throughout the year, but springtime actually has the most occurrences.

Myth: Bats are rodents.

Fact: Although bats are similar to rodents, they have more in common with primates (which include us) than they do with rodents.

Myth: If you get arrested, you’re entitled to make one phone call.

Fact: It’s only a law in some states (California, for example). In most states, it’s just a courtesy or privilege offered, not a legal right. (Some jurisdictions might even let you make a second phone call.)

Elvis Presley collected statuettes of Joan of Arc and Venus de Milo.

STORYTELLERS

Let’s see what some of the most influential creators of modern mythology have to say about making stuff up.

Fiction is like a spider’s web, attached ever so lightly perhaps, but still attached to life at all four corners.

—Virginia Woolf

Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.

—Alfred Hitchcock

I have ten commandments. The first nine are, ‘Thou shalt not bore.’ The tenth is, ‘Thou shalt have right of final cut.’

—Billy Wilder

Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing.

—Margaret Chittenden

Science fiction writers, I am sorry to say, really do not know anything. We can’t talk about science, because our knowledge of it is limited and unofficial, and usually our fiction is dreadful.

—Philip K. Dick

You take people, you put them on a journey, you give them peril, you find out who they really are.

—Joss Whedon

I thought drama was when the actor cried. But drama is when the audience cries.

—Frank Capra

The trouble with writing fiction is that it has to make sense, whereas real life doesn’t.

—Iain M. Banks

"When I made Star Wars, I consciously set about to re-create myths. And the classic mythological motifs. And I wanted to use those motifs to deal with issues that existed today."

—George Lucas

I steal from every movie ever made.

—Quentin Tarantino

The faster I write, the better my output. If I’m going slow, I’m in trouble. It means I’m pushing the words instead of being pulled by them.

—Raymond Chandler

"A film is—or should be—more like music than like fiction. It should be a progression of moods and feelings. The theme, what’s behind the

Reviews for Uncle John's Facts to Go Modern Mythology

[Marcelino Decena · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

The ancient Greeks had Zeus; today we have the Burger King. In Modern Mythology, you’ll meet the world’s most fascinating heroes, villains, and corporate spokesthingies.

[david wuest · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

if you are a fan with many volumes read, this has a lot of repeats if not, plunge away