Alright, Well I Love You

By Sharon Lopez

No one ever wants to become a statistic. When that statistic happens to be your own daughter, it becomes an unbearable nightmare unfolding before your very eyes. The last thing Jo ever thought was her strong-willed daughter would become a victim of domestic violence. One day that is just what happened. Follow Jo as she takes you back to the very beginning of it all, and walks you through her family's horror as it all develops.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sharon Lopez
• Release date: Apr 14, 2016
• ISBN: 9781386107552

Sharon Lopez

Sharon is a multi-genre young adult author that dabbles in adult tales from time to time. It’s all about the story is not just a catchphrase but a spirit that is inside all of her books. When she is not writing, she can be found getting lost in other author’s worlds, watching Slice Of Life Anime, or getting annihilated as she tries her hand at various video games. She is inspired by many things. Whether it’s an encouraging word, a kooky dream, or a personal experience, she will put it to excellent use. As a defender of the defenseless, Sharon’s characters take on this persona with strong female leads and males that are protective, perfect, boyfriend material.

Book preview

Chapter one

In the beginning

I never expected to be here sitting in a hospital waiting for my daughter to wake from a coma. If you told me she was going to become the next statistic, I would have called you a liar. Not Annabel. She is strong, and will never take shit from anyone, I would have said. Yet here I sit in my plaid lounge pants, staring at the shell of the girl whom I love more than anything in this world, and praying to God that he doesn’t take my baby away from me.

I tried so hard to help her get away from the abuse of that man. Many people did. I felt so helpless, watching her go through the aggression, and calling the police or moving her back home, only for her to run back to him time after time. I tried to be supportive, but always warned her that things would only get worse. It wasn’t always this way. I remember who she was before. Before her kids were born, and before him.

Annabel is beautiful, strong, and smart. Her wavy brown hair and bright blue eyes captivate you and draw you in. She has an opinion about everything, and boy, is she willing to share it, whether or not you want to hear it. She stands up for the injustices of the world, no matter who she has to go against. She is that friend you can call, no matter what time of the day or night, and she will drop whatever she is doing to give all of herself to help. She pretends nothing fazes her; even though I know she has her own baggage that she hides from the rest of the world. Most parents will talk up their children, because, well, that is what parents do. When I say how beautiful, smart, and talented Annabel is, I mean that. On the surface, she can be quite abrasive, but that is just to keep her from getting hurt. It is a defense mechanism she learned somewhere along the way. If you truly got the chance to know the real Annabel, you would agree she is a pretty cool person.

Mine and Annabel’s relationship is a complex one, to say the least; not like the one she has with her father. He can do no wrong, and the sun rises and sets in the crack of his bum, or at least, it used to. Kevin has been the fun parent; always being the friend; which left me to have to be the disciplinarian. I would tell Annabel no, and Kevin would say yes. I would ground Annabel for something she had done wrong, and Kevin would tell me I was being too harsh, and then he unground her. So Kevin was the life of the party, and I was known as the fun sucker among other not so nice things.

Kevin and Annabel used to be inseparable before our divorce. Wherever he went, Annabel was with him. Everything I did or said was met with a continuous battle with the two of them, which left me feeling worthless and not wanted around by either of them. It felt like I was the third wheel in a family where I was supposed to be the wife and mother. Never appreciated. Always manipulated or taken advantage of.

I am not saying that I handled things gracefully. More often than not, I would catch myself yelling and name calling out of frustration. I never felt in control of myself back then. It was a long, hard, exhausting ride to where I am now. Looking back, it seems like someone else’s life, too many lifetimes ago, to recall all the details clearly.

It was October 2004 when Kevin moved Annabel and me to a three-bedroom house in the middle of nowhere. Kevin had a new job opportunity he just couldn’t pass up, so Annabel and I would pick up and follow him, yet again. This is the way it had been for the twelve plus years I had been married to Kevin; every year a new place, and promises of a better life for us. Nothing ever really changed, though, and the jobs never lasted for more than six months at a time.

This time will be different, Kevin said.

Truer words have never been spoken because within ten months, Kevin and I were having a very different conversation.

I don’t know if I want to be married anymore, Kevin said one afternoon.

You don’t know if you want to be married at all, or just to me?

It has nothing to do with you.

I nodded my head, knowing that this must have to do with someone else. So, who is she?

Kevin became defensive. There is no one else! You and I just fight all the time and I can’t take it anymore.

I knew he was right. Truthfully, since our argument back in 1996, when he announced he didn’t love me, and only married me because I was pregnant with Annabel, I had only grown more resentful of him. We rarely talked or spent any time together, and his cheating only became more blatant and cruel. I had no interest in him intimately anymore and only gave in because of marital obligation.

The more depressing truth was that during all this time of being together, I had become totally dependent on him. He always told me he’d rather I stay home to raise Annabel than work, so my life became taking care of my family. Any attempts of mine through the years to go back to school to learn a trade were met with excuses about there not being enough money for me to do so. Though there was always money for Kevin’s whims, and he had started and dropped out of more college programs than I can remember.

He wants a divorce. I cried to Kevin’s mother over the phone.

Why?

The tone of her voice struck me as off. I thought that she and Kevin had already had this conversation and she knew how Kevin felt and why this was happening.

I don’t know. He says he doesn’t want to be married anymore.

You two were young when you got married.

Her words hit me. I wanted to scream that she and my mother were the reason Kevin and I got married to begin with. I was fine with raising Ann on my own. Kevin and I had decided that our relationship was over before I took the pregnancy test. I wanted to remind her it was her butting her nose into our relationship that made Kevin feel guilty enough about getting me pregnant that he finally proposed. I didn’t though. There was no use in dragging up the past, even if I had a solid argument.

What am I supposed to do?

Have you prayed about this?

Yes, if God is talking to me, I am not hearing anything!

Open your Bible.

To what? Where in the Bible is it going to tell me why Kevin is doing this and how to stop him?

Open your Bible, Jo. God will show you what you need to know.

I sighed giving up all hope that she was going to help me.

Alright.

I hung up the phone and asked God to show me what I needed to know. I blindly opened my Bible and began to read. Before my eyes was line after line talking about a quarreling wife. ‘So, this is my fault?’ I thought to myself. ‘It isn’t enough that I put myself down daily? Now God has decided to take his shots too?’

I forgot the Bible speaks frankly and directly. What I failed to realize at the time was that God wasn’t saying Hey it’s your fault. That was my own insecurities talking. He was trying to tell me to stop fighting Kevin, wanting to leave. God was telling me to let go. I am getting ahead of myself, though, because at the time I didn’t realize what I was being shown. I began to cry after my misunderstanding of What I needed to know and I begged Kevin to forgive me.

I’ll stop I promise! I’ll really try to make this work. To make us work. Kev, just give us a chance.

I don’t know.

I was pretty devastated. I cared about Kevin, though our relationship was clearly toxic, but most of all, I was scared. I didn’t know if I could be a single mom, and I had not worked since I was a teenager. I didn’t even have my driver’s license at that time, so I did not know how Annabel and I would survive without Kevin.

I noticed Kevin was gone from home more often, and when he started to not come home until early morning hours, I knew I had been right all along. Kevin was having another affair. I found out that not only did he have feelings for someone else, but that this someone else was his boss.

The term Annabel and I came up with for her was The Amazon Bitch From Hell. She earned this title fairly, because, as she stated, she only stole Kevin from me because she could. She wasn’t in love with him. I personally don’t believe she is capable of caring for anyone but herself. 

As the weeks passed, Kevin didn’t even try to hide his obsession with the Amazon bitch from hell, and in October 2005, he moved in with her.

Annabel was beside herself with grief. She felt like her father didn’t love her anymore, and that she was being replaced.

Though she always said she didn’t blame me for her dad leaving, it sure seemed like she took it out on me. The small amount of time she used to listen to me was replaced with complete defiance. She became very angry, and soon we were arguing all the time. Annabel began hanging out with a really bad crowd. She started using drugs and alcohol and got into trouble with the police. I tried to get Kevin to help me get through to her, but he was too busy with his new life. All of Annabel’s rebellions became my fault, and my attempt to put a stop to her wild behavior was met with resistance. Kevin would tell Annabel that he would take care of it when she called to complain about my newest punishment for her and he did take care of it, or I should say fight me on it.

After an argument about me telling Annabel, she couldn’t go somewhere on a school night, she went into her room and slammed the door.

Do you really have to slam the door? I yelled across the house.

I heard Annabel’s door open and then slam shut again.

Damn it, Ann, knock it off!

Again, Annabel opened her door and slammed it.

If you slam that door again, I’m going to take it!

Annabel opened and then slammed her door shut repeatedly.

Fine!

I grabbed some tools and took to the task of removing Annabel’s door. I took her door off the hinges and hung a blanket up so she would have some privacy.

You can’t just take my door!

I warned you, Ann.

Ann came out of her room with her cell phone in hand and a smile on her face. Dad wants to talk to you.

What Kevin, I said, taking the phone.

Ann called me crying. She said you took off her door.

What do you want me to do? She won’t stop slamming it.

Just put the door back on, Jo.

You know what? I will give her the door back when she can learn to stop slamming it! I handed Annabel her phone back.

Annabel made a growling sound and stormed off into the bathroom and slammed the door.

Stop slamming the damn door!

A few minutes later, my phone rang. It was my mother. ‘Oh, here we go.’ I thought.

Yes, mother, I said, answering my phone.

"Is that how you answer your phone? My mother asked.

Well, I figured you were calling me to tell me to put Ann’s door back on.

I don’t think taking her door was the wisest decision.

Mom, she won’t stop slamming the doors.

A young girl needs her privacy, Jo.

I hung a blanket. It isn’t like she doesn’t have any privacy.

Jo, I don’t think you can afford to make any rash decisions.

What are you talking about?

Kevin is pretty angry about this and if he goes to your divorce hearing and tells the judge this—

Oh, for crying out loud, mother!

He could get CPS involved, Jo. Do you really want to lose Annabel, too?

"Whatever! You two win again. When Ann gets so out of hand that she doesn’t listen to either of you, I want you