My Compass, Our Story: A Journey Through Death and Life

By Mike Russell

Imagine not only demanding input from your recently deceased wife, but getting a response. This is the experience that led Mike Russell out of the complicated and harsh world of bereavement and into the process of discovering life again. Through the telling of this true story, he finds that there is life after death for himself, and he also finds the spiritual connections to a world unseen as he connects the dots placed in front of him.

This book will give readers who have lost someone to death a chance to reflect on their own stories while giving hope that there is indeed a way out of the darkness that humans have created around the subject of death and grief. The writings emerge from the deepest crevices created when death occurs and wonderfully unfold into life with the help of a deep and eternal love.

Follow Mike’s journey from the uncompromising yet truthful demand he made of his wife after her death, through his path to save himself. The journey is accomplished with the help of inspired input from sources outside of his normal thought process, along with the help of an Archangel and poetry inspired from his deceased wife, and personal messages that cover a two-year period of reflection. Grief is never an easy path to take, but this book will hopefully give grieving readers comfort as they move through the fog of uncertainty and into their own light through these heartfelt messages of love, forgiveness, pain, and humor.

Although written from the often-lost world of a man’s perspective, this book is for every adult who is grieving the loss of a family member or other loved one.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mike Russell
• Release date: Mar 17, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370033140

Mike Russell

MIKE RUSSELL spent twenty years in law enforcement and is currently the president of Mob Cop Productions, making films and other media about what he knows best. He is the author of Undercover Cop. He lives in Delray Beach, FL.

Book preview

"The lesson to be learned from My Compass, Our Story is that if you do not bring forth what is within you it will destroy you but if you bring forth what is within you it will save you. Read on and prepare yourself for life."

~ Bernie Siegel, MD author of

A Book of Miracles and Love, Animals & Miracles

One man’s journey from heartbreak to healing told in a personal, conversational style. You get the feeling you are reading an unfiltered private diary. This book does not pretend to be a piece of great literature. But if you want to look through an open window into the heart and soul of a man trying to come to terms with loss, this book is perfect for you. Each of us will, in time, have to cross many of the same bridges the author has crossed in this book. He seems to know this and is gentle with the reader. I appreciated the book and found it to be an easy read covering a topic that has no easy parts.

~ Rev. Bob Luckin, DD

Mike Russell reminds us that when we feel torn apart, due to the death of a loved one or friend, must go through the various stages of grief. Through his experiences, insights, humor, connection to his beloved wife, Barb who died, and his poetry he weaves together a tapestry of love, truth, wisdom, and healing. This is a must-read for all who are grieving.

~ Sharon Lund author of

Sacred Living Sacred Dying: A Guide to Embracing Life and Death

"This is an important book. And not just for men, either. As I read, I saw that so much of the book’s wisdom also applies to women who find themselves in grief and not fully functioning. Further, I felt the book’s contents would be useful even if the adult who had passed was not a spouse but a parent, or a brother or sister.

"I found the poetry interspersed throughout to be beautiful and thought provoking; a pleasant surprise, considering I don’t normally choose to read poetry!

"In short, My Compass, Our Story is a worthy and valuable addition to adults grieving the loss of another adult."

~ Lynette M. Smith, author of

How to Write Heartfelt Letters to Treasure

Mike Russell’s writing is brave, authentic, inspired, descriptive, and peppered with sage advice for anyone healing from the loss a loved one.  His lessons are insightful, wise, and touching.

~ Rev. Judy Winkler, president

New View New Life (a prison ministry)

MY COMPASS, OUR STORY

A Journey Through Death and Life

Mike Russell

My Compass, Our Story

A Journey Through Death and Life

Copyright © 2017 Mike Russell

Smashwords Edition

"This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Cover design: Ardel Chisholm, LincMedia Design

Sacred Life Publishers™

SacredLife.com

Contents

Endorsements

Dedication

Foreword by Steve Arndt

Introduction—My Compass

Chapter 1—First Steps

Poems

Inspired

You Are

The Compass

I Found God Within

Finding Love

Two Souls

Theme Song

Walking Backwards

Chapter 2—Men Don’t Cry

Poems

Stop-Sign Tears

Second Guesses

Quiet Peace

Where Are You?

Chapter 3—Tackling Yourself

Poems

Tackling Ghosts

Slow Treadmill

A Need to Be Sad

Chapter 4—The New Normality

Poems

Freedom

The Leaf

Life and Death

Hope

Leaving

Chapter 5—The Dreaded Question

Poems

Direct Connect

The Veil

The Path

Chapter 6—The Silence

Poems

What Now?

Softly

Long and Short

A Day in Time

To Remember

Chapter 7—Unexpected Strength

Poems

Silence

Some Days

Catharsis

Talk to the Wind

Chapter 8—Different but All the Same

Poems

The Puzzle of Life

Does It Matter?

Purpose

Chapter 9—Bravery

Poems

You Tried to Tell Me

Live

Chapter 10—Out of the Cave

Poems

Spirit

So Much Time

Remember

Chapter 11—Into the Parade

Poems

One Step

Being at Peace

Chapter 12—Unexpected Paths

Poems

Peace Blanket

Companion

The Burden

Scents

Chapter 13—Taking Stock

Poems

The Gift

Eternally

Peace

Chapter 14—Surviving the Twists and Turns

Poems

Thank You

Searching for Peace

Lights

Another Time

Chapter 15—The Voice of Reason

Poems

Words

The Trip

Street Corner Sobriety

You Are with Me

Chapter 16—Those Little Moments

Poems

Transformation

Synchronicity

Eagle

Past and Future

Chapter 17—Connecting and Reflecting

Poems

Mist

Happiness

Being Lost

Weight

You Know Someone Loves You

Chapter 18—The End and the Beginning

Final Quote From Archangel Raphael

Acknowledgments

About the Author

I would like to dedicate this book to the memory of Barbara Grace Russell, whose soul purpose was to create a nuclear family through which she could use her talents of organization, encouragement, and direction. Her love resides within all her family and will extend out through the generations. She was there for me when I needed it most, and through her spiritual communication, she helped lead me out of the fog of grief. Thank you, my loving friend and partner.

Foreword

My relationship with Mike Russell began more than thirty-five years ago, in the small community of Mt. Angel, Oregon. Mike was an up-and-coming banker, and I was the principal of the local grade school. Our families met and immediately began an enduring friendship that has spanned years of career moves, family additions, and life altering changes, including the death of a child and a spouse. Each of us deals with hard times in different ways, and Mike is no different. The book that Mike has written focuses on his spiritual, mental, and physical journey, and how he navigated life’s route, which was completely re-coursed after the January 2009 death of his wife, Barbara. He hopes people can use his book to assist them in their own life journey, especially when that passage suddenly takes an unwanted turn.

December is usually the time when people make resolutions based on what took place the prior year. I am sure at Christmas in 2008 Mike was busily formulating resolutions that focused on his family and his work, the wild and crazy mortgage market. According to the New York Times, the following were top five New Year’s resolutions that year:

1. Spend more time with family

2. Lose weight

3. Get fit

4. Quit a bad habit

5. Enjoy life more

December turned into January, and his 2009 resolutions were dashed with the unexpected death of his wife. Nowhere on the list was Deal with the death of a spouse or Nurture six young adult children on one’s own—both daunting scenarios made exponentially worse when working in tandem. Instead of focusing on resolutions, Mike was forced to face the stark reality that his wife, the mother of their children and the rock of their relationship, would no longer be the person he had been awakening beside each morning. While the rest of the world (or so it probably seemed to Mike) was trying to figure out how to spend more time with family, shed those few pounds, and find new ways to enjoy life, Mike was thrust into the unenviable position of widower, making him the sole decision maker, caretaker of teens still at home, nurturer of other young adult children, and breadwinner. Mike had little time for himself and for dealing with his own feelings, as the immediate needs and care of his family were more pressing.

Life does not come with an instruction book to see us through turmoil and crises. No amount of college courses taken for degree completion prepares a person for challenges faced when grave misfortune strikes. Mike has written this book to share his journey, in hopes that others can learn from his experiences. Yet he admits that no two people grieve the same way or at the same pace. In the Five Stages of Grief, it states people must go through the following steps when dealing with a life-changing event:

1. Denial

2. Anger

3. Bargaining

4. Depression

5. Acceptance

Mike writes that it took him almost five years to get through these stages—more years than many, yet fewer than some. Mike has a unique way of blending prose with poetry and uses life examples to illustrate how he learned to cope with the death of a spouse, regroup, and eventually recover. After coming to accept the hand put before him, with help of a spiritual angel, Mike has since embarked on a new path.

The journey to publish this guidebook began as a blog—a personal and therapeutic release for Mike. As the months passed, he slowly transitioned through the stages of grief, and the blog morphed into this book. It does not tell you how to survive a crisis; rather, it speaks to what he found as personal comfort and solace during his walk through this dark period. Mike knows the book is not intended to remove the difficult or bleak episodes from our lives but rather shed light on seeking a new and brighter