Kelpie Christmas: A Paranormal Romantic Adventure: Kelpie Tales, #1

By Steve Vernon

What brings Rhonda (full-time assassin for hire), Lady Macbeth (part-time assassin and full-time librarian), and a mythical kelpie to a dark wintry alley?

How does three against five equal three against two?

What secret is hiding inside of the Salvation Army cauldron?

All of these answers and more are waiting for you in this short paranormal romance shoot-em-up story - written for readers who HATE to read romance.


WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT STEVE VERNON

"If Harlan Ellison, Richard Matheson and Robert Bloch had a three-way sex romp in a hot tub, and then a team of scientists came in and filtered out the water and mixed the leftover DNA into a test tube, the resulting genetic experiment would most likely grow up into Steve Vernon." - Bookgasm

"Steve Vernon is something of an anomaly in the world of horror literature. He's one of the freshest new voices in the genre although his career has spanned twenty years. Writing with a rare swagger and confidence, Steve Vernon can lead his readers through an entire gamut of emotions from outright fear and repulsion to pity and laughter." - Cemetery Dance

"Armed with a bizarre sense of humor, a huge amount of originality, a flair for taking risks and a strong grasp of characterization - Steve's got the chops for sure." - Dark Discoveries

"Steve Vernon was born to write. He's the real deal and we're lucky to have him." - Richard Chizmar

My Mom thinks I'm pretty cool, too.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Stark Raven Publishing
• Release date: Jan 8, 2017
• ISBN: 9781386475187

Steve Vernon

Everybody always wants a peek at the man behind the curtain. They all want to see just exactly what makes an author tick.Which ticks me off just a little bit - but what good is a lifetime if you can't ride out the peeve and ill-feeling and grin through it all. Hi! I am Steve Vernon and I'd love to scare you. Along the way I'll try to entertain you and I guarantee a giggle as well.If you want to picture me just think of that old dude at the campfire spinning out ghost stories and weird adventures and the grand epic saga of how Thud the Second stepped out of his cave with nothing more than a rock in his fist and slew the mighty saber-toothed tiger.If I listed all of the books I've written I'd most likely bore you - and I am allergic to boring so I will not bore you any further. Go and read some of my books. I promise I sound a whole lot better in print than in real life. Heck, I'll even brush my teeth and comb my hair if you think that will help any.For more up-to-date info please follow my blog at:http://stevevernonstoryteller.wordpress.com/And follow me at Twitter:@StephenVernonyours in storytelling,Steve Vernon

Book preview

KELPIE CHRISTMAS

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BY

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STEVE VERNON

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Kelpie Tales #1

Table of Contents

Title Page

Stark Raven Press

KELPIE CHRISTMAS

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Further Reading: Kelpie Snow: A Paranormal Romantic Adventure

Also By Steve Vernon

Stark Raven Press

January 2017

KELPIE CHRISTMAS

STAKEOUTS IN THE HEART of a Nova Scotia Christmas meant adding a heavy suit of long johns and at least one extra pair of gray woolly socks – not a particularly stylish look for anyone, but Rhonda somehow made the whole thing work underneath the added scarlet girth of her store-bought Santa Claus suit.

At least I think that she managed to make the Santa suit work for at least the first three and a half hours of our vigil.

My feet are getting cold, Rhonda complained. These imitation black leather Santa boots just aren’t cutting it.

Forget about it, I said. That Santa suit that you are wearing is a whole lot warmer than this elf’s costume. Lincoln green just isn’t my color.

You should have worn the pointy ears, Rhonda argued.

If I wanted pointy ears I would call a plastic surgeon, I replied. I like my ears just the shape that they already are, thanks.

Rhonda was my best friend. Also,