Winning Ways To Work

By Rupert Eales-White

Would you like to:

• Achieve all the goals you set yourself, in whatever area of your life you choose?
• Learn how to be ‘on the same wavelength’ rapidly with anyone you meet in your business world?
• Improve your leadership and team-building competences?
• Learn to think and write with impeccable logic?
• Gain promotion within your organisation?
• Transform your company’s profitability?

Then Winning Ways to Work is the book for you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Legend Press
• Release date: Feb 15, 2012
• ISBN: 9781908775535

Rupert Eales-White

Rupert's first career was with Barclays Bank, where he became their first group strategic planning manager, his second career was as a senior management development consultant, and his third was running his own training and development business.

Book preview

Chapter 1

Achieve all Your Goals

INTRODUCTION

In this first chapter, we:

THE POWER OF GOAL-SETTING

The remarkable 3%

A very powerful piece of research was carried out using Yale University graduates. They were surveyed in the 1950s, when at Yale, and again 20 years later.

The research showed that 3% were worth more in terms of wealth than the other 97% put together. This 3% also had better health and enjoyed better relationships with others.

Only one thing fully explained this remarkable 3%:97% split. It was not parental wealth. It was not degree subjects taken. It was not career selected. It was not ethnicity. It was not gender based. It was not any other of the more obvious factors.

What produced this remarkable difference was that the 3% had produced written goals in the 1950s. The 97% had not.

Clearly, just writing down goals would not guarantee their achievement. To explain what happened, we start by considering the role that the subconscious plays in decision-taking.

THE ROLE OF THE SUBCONSCIOUS IN DECISION-TAKING

The power of 5

A tutor ran a 3 day development programme for a law firm. Part of the feedback and review sheet asked the delegates to anonymously assess the tutor on a scale from 1= Very Poor to 5= Excellent.

From the opening of any programme to the end, the walls were progressively covered by flip-charts summarizing key information points, key learning points and so on.

On this particular programme (and only on this programme as I put a stop to the experiment when I discovered it), wherever possible and as prominently as possible, the tutor deployed the number 5 and only the number 5, e.g. 5 ways to persuade a client, 5 key learning points, 5 steps to success in negotiation and so on.

It was the only development programme from a suite of programmes that ran for over 13 years, where there was a clean sweep of 5s for any tutor in my tutorial team.

ICEBERG COMMUNICATION THEORY

Imagine you are an Iceberg, floating in the Arctic Circle. The conscious communication is what takes place above the surface. The subconscious communication takes place below the waterline. So only 10% of our communication is driven by the conscious self. A massive 90% is driven from the subconscious self. When two Icebergs (people) meet, their initial communication is below the surface, i.e. from the subconscious. First impressions count. From this reality are derived the three Iceberg laws.

Author’s note

I consider the figure of 90% an exaggeration for effect. The actual percentage varies from individual to individual. I have met many individuals who spend most of their time in what is called the rational adult ego state, i.e. behaving as adults, in full control of themselves and the decisions they take. On the other hand, I have met quite a number of other individuals, where behaving rationally is very much the exception, and the Iceberg percentage would hold true.

1. Every stimulus produces a response

2. A single detail can produce 100% of a decision

3. You can consciously affect the subconscious behaviour of others and so change their conscious behaviour

1. We can take a specific one-off action

The example already provided is for the senior associates to give the top mark of 5.

2. We can form a specific fact, viewpoint or opinion

We believe consciously that these facts, viewpoints, and opinions are our own. We fail to recognize that the source lies elsewhere. Ownership is necessary for our self-confidence. We all like to believe that we are independent thinkers. We make up our own minds.

3. We can form an explicit belief

4. We can develop an implicit belief

GOLDEN REALITY RULE 1

Never ever tell an individual whose behaviour is being driven from the subconscious by hidden Mr Hyde (or any other SCID – Subconsciously Controlling Inner Demon – for that matter) the truth.

GOLDEN REALITY RULE 2

If a boss and a subordinate get into a conflict situation, the organisation will invariably back the boss, regardless of the merits of the case.

[In Chapter 6, Succeed in the Political World, we set out how you can make any boss, however difficult they are currently perceived, into a champion for your career – without any compromise to your personal integrity]

5. A true aspect of our nature can be pushed into our subconscious to form a suppression or hidden truth

See the Sally case study in the next chapter for an example of this.

CREATE A NEW HABIT

In this section:

Author’s notes

THE ROLE PLAYED BY BELIEFS

What is very interesting is the supporting role played by beliefs. It is the message (in this case accept with a smile) and the accompanying consistent behaviour that dominates the creation of a new habit. The belief that "I should not devote time and energy trying to change what I cannot control or, at least, influence outcomes in my favour" tends to be implicit throughout the formation of the habit.

The accepting smile

Madhav, a psychologist, was stressed by any event that was outside his control, e.g. a pile-up on the M25 meaning he was late for work, a boss or client suddenly changing the goal posts or the regular criticism he received from his boss.

To eliminate this stress, whenever such an event took place, he said to himself accept with a smile. It took a lot of effort and repetitions before the internal smile was genuine – rather than a ghastly grimace.

He succeeded, when the internal smile was involuntarily and simultaneously mirrored on his face. It was a very minor smile indeed, a swift wrinkling of the lips that was not noticed by the casual observer.

The first genuine internal smile counted as the first successful behavioural change. After 20 conscious repetitions, it had become a habit. He became a very relaxed, stress free individual – second nature.

HOW THE 3% PRODUCED THEIR OUTSTANDING SUCCESS

PROCESS TO ACHIEVE ALL YOUR GOALS

CRITICAL CONCLUDING COMMENTS