Wholehearted

By Erica Yang

When the college health clinic discovers Bonnie Deluca was born with a hole in the wall of her heart, she finds herself suddenly facing surgery -- and the family she's been estranged from since leaving home. They don't accept her girlfriend, don't respect her needs, and aren't the people she wants making her medical decisions if anything goes wrong. A friendly nurse points out that a new option has become available in their state: thanks to marriage equality, Bonnie can make Tina her next of kin.

Tina Harper never thought she'd be getting married at nineteen. In spite of her fear, she wants to be there for Bonnie as best she can. Tina agrees to marry Bonnie so she can protect her.

As she faces off with Bonnie's family, Tina can only hope Bonnie will come out of surgery wholehearted and ready to live with the decision they've made.

• Language: English
• Publisher: JMS Books LLC
• Release date: Feb 28, 2016
• ISBN: 9781634860567

Erica Yang

Erica Yang is a queer writer of young adult fiction. For more information, please visit ericayangauthor.wordpress.com.

Book preview

Wholehearted

By Erica Yang

Published by JMS Books LLC at Smashwords

Visit jms-books.com for more information.

Copyright 2016 Erica Yang

ISBN 9781634860567

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Cover Design: Written Ink Designs | written-ink.com

Image(s) used under a Standard Royalty-Free License.

All rights reserved.

WARNING: This book is not transferable. It is for your own personal use. If it is sold, shared, or given away, it is an infringement of the copyright of this work and violators will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review.

This book is for ADULT AUDIENCES ONLY. It may contain sexually explicit scenes and graphic language which might be considered offensive by some readers. Please store your files where they cannot be accessed by minors.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are solely the product of the author’s imagination and/or are used fictitiously, though reference may be made to actual historical events or existing locations. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Published in the United States of America.

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Wholehearted

By Erica Yang

Chapter 1: A Hole in the Wall of the Heart

Tina Harper reached for her girlfriend’s hand in the hospital bed. A friend would hold another friend’s hand, right? At a serious time like this? She knew Bonnie wasn’t out to the family that surrounded them, but this was a normal gesture that wouldn’t cross any lines. Bonnie squeezed Tina’s fingers, her eyes full of unspoken emotions.

"Sweetie, don’t you think it’s time for your friend to take a break?" Bonnie’s mother said, giving Tina a pointed, unfriendly glance and letting the word friend twist around her tongue. This is a moment for family, she continued. Don’t you think?

Tina stiffened, snatching her hand away from Bonnie without meaning to. She couldn’t help waiting a beat for Bonnie to defend her, for Bonnie to tell her mother that they loved each other and had been dating since the first week of college. Her girlfriend stayed silent, though. Tina took a deep breath and forced herself to smile at Bonnie’s mother, father, aunt, and younger brothers. She muttered a goodbye, turned on one heel, and stalked out of the room.

She knew Bonnie was suffering. Having the college health clinic suddenly discover that Bonnie had been born with a hole in the wall of her heart—and could have died from it anytime up until now—had to be terrifying in itself. But Bonnie had also never been able to be herself around her family, and it had been two years since she’d talked to any of them. Having them appear now seemed like a mixed bag. Tina ached to be there for Bonnie, to listen to her as she worked through these things. She didn’t want to cause any drama of her own at a time like this.

On the other hand, she couldn’t stop the tears that had begun to flow down the sides of her face. The last thing she wanted was to take a break. She wanted to be by Bonnie’s side at every possible moment, not be reminded that she wasn’t technically Bonnie’s family, not be treated as a weirdly close friend. Tina loved Bonnie Deluca. She was the person who actually saw her and spent time with her. She had driven Bonnie to the hospital from the clinic for the initial tests. She had filled a flash drive with Bonnie’s favorite shows so she wouldn’t feel lonely in the quiet when visiting hours were over. She had emailed Bonnie’s professors and friends to let them know what was going on (the college nurse, for better or for worse, had taken care of getting in touch with Bonnie’s family).

She didn’t want to burden Bonnie with her own feelings right now, but it hurt to get kicked out of the hospital room. It hurt especially to think of how differently Bonnie’s family might be reacting to her if she was a boyfriend, not a girlfriend. It hurt to have to wonder exactly what about herself bothered them so much. Were they upset because they could see that Tina and Bonnie were more than friends, even though Bonnie hadn’t told them so directly? Or did they dislike Tina just for being queer and having the haircut to match? Or maybe the spice of racism flavored their homophobia, and what really bothered them was that Tina had inherited her father’s Afro-Caribbean hair texture, even though also being part white and Asian meant her skin was barely brown at all.

Or maybe she was seeing social justice stuff when it wasn’t really there and they would have been just as unwelcoming to a blue-eyed white boyfriend they hadn’t met before.

That familiar mental loop—trying to decide if she was really experiencing prejudice, then worrying about being oversensitive, then hurting again from what really seemed like prejudice—made her feel awful, and it made it even harder to deal with the reality of what was happening to Bonnie.

It made Tina want to scream to think about it all.