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Dream Oracle Series: The Shark
Dream Oracle Series: The Shark
Dream Oracle Series: The Shark
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Dream Oracle Series: The Shark

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Jacqueline is a 25 year old woman from a powerful family in the Hamptons. She has been having recurring nightmares. Her dream symbols in the nightmares are of a thirteen year old girl, darkness around her, a massive thunderstorm, a turbulent ocean, a rickety raft, a shark, and crawling onto a beach barely alive to be covered by seaweeds. The Dream Oracle reveals the meaning of these symbols. The symbol meanings are for Jacqueline to maneuver though real life sexual violations from her powerful stepfather (the shark dream symbol). She must find strength from her romance, risk Hell to get support from her mother, and hope her best friend Tina since high school can save her. There are dangerous secrets, murder, and time is running out as Jacqueline combats the Siren’s call to suicide.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherSeraph
Release dateNov 21, 2015
ISBN9781310904004
Dream Oracle Series: The Shark
Author

Seraph

Seraph is the writer of the Dream Oracle Series. He has an earned Ph.D. in psychology and much of his work involves the interpretation of dream symbols.

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    Book preview

    Dream Oracle Series - Seraph

    Dream Oracle Series

    The Shark

    Seraph

    Copyright © 2015 Serafin Sanchez

    All rights reserved.

    Distributed by Smashwords

    Ebook formatting by www.ebooklaunch.com

    This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this ebook with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

    ISBN 9781310904004

    Facebook www.facebook.com/Seraph-Dream-Oracle-Series-1040794482652032/timeline

    Blog: www.tumblr.com/blog/itheoracleofdreams

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    Ebook cover by http://fionajaydemedia.com/

    Table of Contents

    Chapter 1: Dream Oracle

    Chapter 2: Reflection

    Chapter 3: Family Business

    Chapter 4: Powerful Dating

    Chapter 5: Memories of Death

    Chapter 6: Memories of Medical Profession

    Chapter 7: Best Friends

    Chapter 8: All About Charles

    Chapter 9: Back to Life

    Chapter 10: Message is Read

    Chapter 11: Messed Up

    Chapter 12: The Plan

    Chapter 13: Going Home

    Chapter 14: Fundraiser

    Chapter 15: Dangerous Stealth

    Chapter 16: Hell to Pay

    Chapter 17: Will You Still Love Me

    Chapter 18: Return of Tina

    Chapter 19: Deadly

    Chapter 20: A Funeral

    Chapter 21: Face to Face

    Chapter 22: Jacqueline and Charles

    Chapter 1: Dream Oracle

    The Present, Jacqueline’s lavish apartment.

    Jacqueline stares into the darkness. She is breathing hard, recovering from remembering her nightmare. She is leaning back in her chair. Jacqueline thinks back to the lunch conversation she had with her best friend. Their conversations had started innocently enough talking about their love interests. From a wonderful care free time, they had somehow managed to go into a dark, dangerous area of Jacqueline’s life. The darkness in Jacqueline’s life linked to her nightmares.

    Unknow to Jacqueline and her best friend Tina, these nightmares will take them into danger. A danger that will end up costing many their lives and put those of their loved ones in danger.

    ****

    The past, Amada restaurant, New York City, New York

    Tina is taking inventory of Jacqueline’s physical features during their talks. Almost a complete contrast to Tina’s own features. Jacqueline’s features are of sharp nose, chin, and jaw. She looks stunning with facial high cheekbones, bronze looking skin, very curvaceous feminine body. She is not as tall as Tina with a little over 5 foot. Jacqueline has wavy long black hair flowing down to her mid back. Tina enjoys looking into Jaqueline’s piercing green eyes. C’mon, Jacqueline, make an account on that Dream Oracle webpage! What these nightmares are doing to you are starting to worry me.

    Tina narrows her eyes as she raises her eyebrows as Jacqueline huffs back at her dear friend. "Tina, you know I’m not typically into this whole ‘your life is impacted by your dream’s’ business.’

    I’m just having a lot of trouble getting a good night’s sleep. It’s just nasty nightmares."

    Tina shakes her head, "No, your nightmares scare me. Something dark is going on inside you. You will pay dearly if you do nothing about it.

    C’mon, use the webpage! I’ve read such good reviews on it. I can tell you the web site comes highly recommended by those I trust. Me, especially."

    Jacqueline narrows her eyes, "Explain how it works. How are my nightmares even relevant to me getting a good night’s sleep or address my life choices?

    Sure, the nightmares bother me, but I’ve always thought they were just a bunch of random gibberish to make me feel bad."

    Tina takes her friend’s hand connects to her eyes, "From what I’ve heard from you, these nightmares have really shaken you up. It’s so unlike you to be so on edge, and just making it by.

    You know I’m right."

    Jacqueline shakes her a little as she has no response, to which Tina gently smiles back. Squeezing her friend’s hand another time, Tina releases Jacqueline’s hand then begins to explain. "Okay, from what I’ve read about the website, the Dream Oracle interprets the symbols in your dream.

    All of our experiences, including love, hardships, and whatever else are translated by our brain and represented as images…symbols in our dreams."

    Jacqueline observes Tina’s features during their talks. Tina is true to her German ancestry. Her square jaw and facial features. Her porcelain skin, tough looking body, plus she’s tall. She has shoulder length straight blond hair, and Bahama Islands ocean blue eyes.

    Jacqueline with an unblinking stare, slowly nods, Well, I suppose it couldn’t hurt. However, I don’t want my name to be floating around on some dream website. If anyone in my medical field I knew found out about these nightmares, I’d feel kind of exposed. I’ve only talked to you about my nightmares and how they bother me.

    Tina rolls her eyes and grins, "Jacqueline, it’s alright…the website is anonymous!

    I know of some close to me who’ve communicated with the Dream Oracle because they want to know what their unconscious is telling them. I think you owe it to yourself to try it out, too."

    Tina glances at her time piece. Well, I gotta get going.

    Jacqueline nodding her head responds, The same for me. I won’t promise anything about the Dream Oracle…but I’ll think about it.

    The two rises from their seating and the young women hug. Jacqueline leaves more than enough cash to pay for their meal and leave a generous tip.

    Jacqueline faces Tina and informs, It’s my turn to pay for today’s lunch.

    Tina responds, Yeah, I can see you got it covered. You won’t get an argument out of me.

    Jacqueline and Tina making small talk as they leave one of New York’s finest in dining experiences. Their limo drivers are waiting just outside for them as they exit the restaurant. Jacqueline enters her limo. Tina enters her limo. Jacqueline looks back at Tina’s limo pulls away as they go their separate ways. Jacqueline has an ominous feeling whether she wants to know what her nightmares mean.

    ****

    The Present Jacqueline’s Apartment

    Jacqueline comes back to focus on her now early evening sunlight streaming onto her desk. The sun light, giving a surreal lighting to her luxurious residence. She goes to breathing hard after remembering the nightmare that was part of the discussion in her lunch with Tina. She looks at her computer. Jacqueline places her fingers on the keyboard. She stares forward as the computer hums, its soft glow illuminating Jacqueline’s quivering fingers.

    Jacqueline thinking hard before continuing. For those like me, who desire to find the meaning of my nightmare to guide my life paths or life choices, there is the Dream Oracle website option for convenient anonymity. Now, this anonymity is for those of us who feel vulnerable sharing intimate dream symbols of ourselves with a complete stranger.

    I would say the Dream Oracle website is usually the first option where most of us are comfortable to begin engaging in a quest to find meaning of our dream symbols.

    The other Dream Oracle option is the face-to-face dream session. Oh, no, much too scary for me. This face to face is for those who desire in-depth processing of the dream symbols and coming to terms with a life path or life choices. How freaky it is to delve into the symbols of one’s unconscious to make a purposeful decision and sometimes a decision dictated by circumstances in life.

    I guess I have an unconscious circumstance in life I need to decide what to do about it.

    Well then, I shall risk the help of the Dream Oracle to help me decide or make decisions that are dictated by my dream symbols from my life circumstances. I will risk going with the website option as I’m feeling vulnerable sharing my recurrent disturbing nightmare in a face-to-face session.

    With a few soft clicks, Jacqueline’s quivering fingers arrives at the website Tina had insisted she use. As Jacqueline scans the Dream Oracle website, she mutters to herself, Dream Oracle, can you really help me? Do I want to know what my nightmares mean?

    Despite her misgivings, Jacqueline sets up an account and then is guided till she begins typing her submission: ‘Dear Dream Oracle, …

    …in my nightmare there’s a teenage girl floating on a dark cold ocean…

    …she is fearing for her safety. It is darkening around her. Turbulent ocean waves are tossing her around on a rickety raft. She gets close to falling into the ocean several times. One of the times she catches herself on to the edge of raft before falling into the ocean. She is gazing down and sees the shape of something huge moving under the waves below her.

    She freezes in fear as she realizes it is a shadow of a massive shark. Before she can jump back, a splash of ocean spray covers her ill clothed body, blinding her with the stinging salt water, and tossing her into the bone-wrenching cold waters of the ocean.

    While splashing wildly in the ocean, she feels massive pain tear throughout lower parts of her body as she is dragged under the surface of the turbulent ocean waves. She comes up gasping for air and she sees her blood all around the ocean waves splashing away from her.’

    Jacqueline pauses from her Dream Oracle submission to remind herself to breath. She catches her breath, then continues with her submission. With narrowed eyes and furrowed brow, she begins tap on her computer keys.

    ‘…Next thing that happens is that she crawls out of the ocean onto a sandy beach. She is covered with blood, shaking from the cold ocean, and barely alive.

    With life barely holding while on the beach, the girl painfully moves her body and lays on her back. She sees that it is now darker, the ocean suddenly splashes cold dark snake-like items on her body. She recognizes these as seaweeds.

    The cold foul-smelling seaweeds all over the girl’s thighs, what is left of them, and cover her torso, breast, and neck. She is in agony as she is not able to remove the suffocating seaweeds.

    The end of the nightmare. Please help. If you can.’

    Jacqueline catches herself not breathing again and being in the same state as when she just awakens from this horrible nightmare. Jacqueline shakes her head and goes about kick starting her breathing.

    She thinks about her nightmare, I wake up breathing hard and very frightened each time. I’m dreading going to sleep these days.

    Jacqueline goes through the submitting process, pays the minimum fee for waiting, and closes the Dream Oracle website.

    She navigates through other social media sites trying to distract her heightened uneasiness. She reads about the latest gossip of her rich and powerful Mother and Stepfather. When she feels somewhat calmer, Jacqueline powers down her laptop, stares blankly ahead at one of her European art works near her desk for several moments.

    She stares at the ceiling, tilts her head slightly, what happened to me that I end up with a nightmare that keeps coming back? I’m better than this. Why is this happening now? My medical studies are difficult, but I’ve overcome much more challenging experiences. I can’t remember anything else in my life that would leave me terrified like this.

    Since when do I need a Dream Oracle website? Since when do I remember nightmares at all? I get a few dreams here and then but, nothing like the shark nightmare. Nothing in my life…I can remember very little times…which leaves me in this scared mess. It’s like my nightmare has crawled into my life screaming to me to do something important. But, what!!!?

    I’m tougher than this! It’s a lousy nightmare. Nothing that really does me any harm. It’s all in my head. Why do I not have control over this? It’s just in my head. This should be another small issue in life. Mind over issue...address it… get over it and leave it behind.

    Jacqueline leaves her troubling thoughts. She shifts her focus to stare blankly into the wall. She raises her legs to her chest while remaining seated in front of her laptop.

    Chapter 2: Reflection

    The Present, Jacqueline’s Apartment.

    Now, alone in her darkening room, Jacqueline focuses her breathing to calm herself. She’d values her friend Tina’s suggestion. But, these dreams, more nightmares than dreams, fill her with such dread and confusion that she is not sure she can continue this way in her life. She isn’t sure if this Dream Oracle website will do any good to help keep herself alive. Alive? Why did she even think this?

    After some time has passed since her submission to the Dream Oracle, Jacqueline continues to stare blankly into a now less lighted wall as it is early evening.

    Her legs up to her chest while seated in front of her laptop, Jacqueline ponders. What memory or memories are setting off my nightmares?

    Nothing makes sense which comes to mind, as she racks her brains for clarity about what is driving these nightmares.

    Jacqueline knows her twenty-five years of life are exceptionally lived. While growing up, she went the best private schools the Hamptons had to offer. At Yale, she remembers enjoying studies abroad at Oxford and several world trips. She recalls summers in such places like Cinque Terre, known as the Italian Riviera. Jacqueline remembers fairytale like Brugge Belgium. She has different faces going through her memory of making plenty of friends along the way on her wonderful life.

    Jacqueline is reflecting how fortunate she is to belong to a privileged, powerful family. Her stepfather’s heritage reaching back to old money Her Mother’s new money adding to the wealth of their family’s empire. Jacqueline recalling the grand social events of movie or theater post-premiere parties. She thinks of those times dancing at luxurious balls in such places like the Grand Ballroom at the Montcalm Marble Arch in London. Jacqueline grinning to herself remembering the worldwide experiences in such places as Fez in Morocco, as Bora Bora, as Barcelona in Spain, or as Rio de Janeiro in Brazil. Her tastes buds are relishing the exotic foods recalling such some of her favorites while visiting these exotic places. Foods like the Moroccan M’qalli chicken with olives and preserved lemon. The Manti Turkey’s ravioli dish. The Keftes, Kofta, a fancy Greek like sausage with delicious vegetables. All these experiences Jacqueline is concluding have shaped her into a person many envies.

    Jacqueline remembers the remarks of others in her elite social circles saying she has been fortunate to have her Mother’s curvaceous figure, exotic face, that many a grown powerful man and young man were attracted to her. At times, she had been likened to ‘Helen of Troy’ in captivating hearts that could destroy a nation.

    Jacqueline recalling the faces and times of so many young men who tried to get her attention and dared to try and date Jacqueline knowing the reputation of her powerful stepfather. They knew her stepfather as one who crushed anyone who came into her life as a potential boyfriend. Yet, she was never short on suitors.

    Jacqueline thinks of her Mother’s husband Richard possessing an almost inhuman drive for success, an uncanny focus, and a ruthlessness for reaching his desired goals. She knows she has these traits as well as his charismatic charm.

    On her Mother Monica’s financial side, Jacqueline’s knows her Mother is a trust fund billionaire child with billions released to her Mother once she married Richard. Jacqueline remembers her Mother, Monica came from a family that started poor. But, through Grandfather’s doggedness and business savvy, the family managed to breach the billionaire’s social circle. So, her Mother grew to be cunning, just like Jacqueline’s Grandfather and her stepfather.

    She realizes the drive and power of her Mother and stepfather, Jacqueline experiences no barriers in attending many social elite gatherings and forming connections with other wealthy or powerful social circles. The fact that an abundance of powerful and rich persons always wants to befriend her has helped Jacqueline blossom into the confident woman she is to this day.

    Jacqueline appreciates throughout her early years, nannies and hired help who would care for her. They demonstrate a loving predisposition that Jacqueline in turn shares with her very close friends.

    Crossing her arms under her breast, Jacqueline lowers her legs from her chest onto the designer Japanese tile floor. Using her bare feet, she spins around in her ergo-designer chair. While spinning in her chair, Jacqueline is coming to terms on to whether to give her nightmares any real serious time. She greatly dislikes going through her childhood memories as an exercise to figure out the cause of her nightmares.

    She ponders, we all make mistakes, move on and look to the future. I say that if you’re feeling nostalgic go look at a picture. There’s no need to waste time on trivial memories since childhood that may be triggering these nightmares.

    However, her gut says otherwise. Her gut keeps urging Jacqueline to keep looking into her past for clues about her nightmares.

    I need more details, more specifics to know what is causing these nightmares, she concludes.

    The next reasonable step is to turn some attention toward her Mother and stepfather for clues to her nightmares. Being a product of a wealthy lavish life, Jacqueline reasons that interactions with her family might’ve helped shape the issue bothering her. She is hoping for an epiphany. She pushes into her childhood memories regarding her Mother and stepfather.

    Many of Jacqueline’s earliest childhood memories concerning her Mother and stepfather revolve around business. Thinking hard about it, Jacqueline figures their relationship seems more like a business transaction than one based on true love. Jacqueline decides her Mother had never been quite as nurturing as her nannies. Jacqueline felt sure her Mother loved her as a daughter. But, her Mother, Monica had little patience for words about love for Jacqueline or any other person that didn’t revolve around some kind manipulation using the word ‘love’ for business.

    Jacqueline remembers her nannies reading fairytales to her. The stories were of princes sweeping fair maidens off their feet and holding them close to their hearts protecting them from some danger. Love sounded so easy, wonderful, and natural when she was so little with her nannies reading these stories. Jacqueline found at a very young age reality was much less magical when she questioned her Mother Monica about how she and Richard her stepfather met…

    ****

    The Past, Home, Hamptons, New York.

    Little young Jacqueline’s body moves a little while staring at the ornate floor of the mansion. Mom, when you and dad met did he lift you into the air? Did you know right away he was the one? If yes, tell me why?

    Little Jacqueline faces her Mother, smiles, eyes wide. She expects for her Mother to cry a little, exclaiming how she and her Dad fell in love instantly and never left her Father’s side.

    Instead, Monica chuckles, shaking her head while eyeing her daughter. My sweet girl, where did you get all this fluffy nonsense?

    Little Jacqueline’s eyes narrow, a little frown comes upon her face. She is trying to understand love from her Mother. She moves her hands behind her back. She goes to looking down at the designer floor tile in this one of many of the massive luxurious studies.

    With a sigh, upon noticing her daughter’s behavior, Monica supplies, "Alright, I met your Father Richard at a social gathering in the Hamptons, honey.

    It was your grandfather’s idea. Your grandfather wanted to be around with others who had a lot of money.

    On the other hand, your Father Richard was at the function looking for any opportunity to expand his business. Your grandfather figured convincing Richard to marry me would benefit both of us."

    To little Jacqueline, most of what her Mother says didn’t mean much to her. She only wants to hear the prince and fair maiden parts about her Mother and Richard’s love. Their love for each other as in the fairy tales.

    Little Jacqueline has other thoughts. She jumps up and down a little. With eyes wide she is requesting from her Mother. But that’s so boring, Mom. Tell me how you fell in love!

    She leans her little body forward into her Mother’s designer dress concealing her properly crossed legs. She plops against her Mother’s lap. She squeezes Monica’s fingers. Unfortunately, little Jacqueline’s pleading look goes unnoticed.

    While looking at her watch, Monica hurriedly pats Jacqueline’s head, I have to go to a meeting, dear. I’ll see you later tonight.

    She roughly pushes little Jacqueline away while getting up from the comfortable chair. Monica leaving little Jacqueline with trembling little lips and crying streaming down her little cheeks. Her eyes blur with the crying staring at her Mother leaving.

    Chapter 3: Family Business

    The Present, Jacqueline’s Apartment.

    Reeling herself back from her memory as a little girl, Jacqueline releases an exasperated noise, Aaagh!

    She rubs some of the crying away with her fingers. This is all so useless! That memory sucked eggs. I’m no closer to solving what contributed to my nightmares. Even though, I sense that a relationship or relationships may be the key to unlocking what’s driving these nightmares.

    She kneads the bridge of her nose, thinking Alright. Where else can I take my trip down horrible memory lane? What else can I focus on? Some memories that will help me deal with my nightmares.

    I got it. My parents almost never talked about their relationship. They don’t act very close like the typical, intimate couple. But why not?

    Wracking her brain for more information, Jacqueline continues to reach back through some more memories. This time, Jacqueline sees her younger self asking her stepfather Richard about her Mother Monica and his first encounter with her.

    ****

    The Past, Home, Hampton, New York.

    Young Jacqueline is sitting on a large luxurious sofa in one of the mansion’s massive living rooms. Her feet don’t touch the floor and she swings her little legs back and forth. She notices Monica, her Mother is reading with intensity some papers. Jacqueline glances at her Father Richard is also working away reading some papers. She knows this is a rare moment where all three are together. The family is rarely together for any long periods of time. She eyes her Dad without blinking. Jacqueline slides off her sofa and makes her way to Richard.

    She stands in front of him contemplating Richard in silence for several moments before braving to speak. Dad, is it true that you and Mom met at a super boring business meeting?

    Richard’s eyes slide to the right from his documents, connecting with Jacqueline’s eyes. Smiling, he says, Well, it was more like a social gathering, Jacqueline.

    Monica scoffs upon hearing what Richard said while still reading her documents, It was supposed to be a relaxing event, but your Father can’t leave business at the office. He’s always moving from one thing to the other to make money.

    Little Jacqueline briefly glances at Monica then returns to investigate Richard’s comment. She sees him staring at her Mother.

    He raises one eye brow half closing one eye while staring Monica, That’s what you love about me. Isn’t dear? In fact, I recall, one of your lady friends told me that despite my rugged good looks, I was of no interest to you until you discovered I was from money.

    Monica still reading her papers counters You’re so dramatic, dear. Besides, we all know that Elizabeth likes to gossip.

    Grinning, Richard turns to connect with Jacqueline’s unblinking eyes. Now, I’m not heartless like your Mother. When I first saw your Mother, I knew I had to have her. Her princess beauty took my breath away, and it still does.

    Jacqueline squeals, clapping her tiny hands together. She quickly snaps her gaze to her Mother. Mom, you have to say something cute, too! Like Dad.

    Monica slowly lowers her documents eying Jacqueline. Well, your Father latches on to people with those piercing blue eyes of his. Once he sweet talks them a bit, he pulls them in with his smile. Your Father can make anyone feel at ease. I suppose I found that quite… charming.

    Little Jacqueline happily swaying her little body thinking All princes were friendly and had great smiles.

    ****

    The Present, Jacqueline’s Apartment.

    Jacqueline nods her head remembering her understanding of the type of relationship her Mother and her stepfather have. They were not very loving with each other since as long as her earliest childhood memories tell her. It is another memory after this memory, of all princes were friendly and had great smiles which bothers Jacqueline. She recalls, finding out how Richard saw her Mother and herself…this memory stirs something foul in Jacqueline. Jacqueline’s memory is when she is older almost ending her elementary school time. She quietly sneaks out of her bedroom making her way to the kitchen. She knows she is hungry for something to eat in the kitchen. She just doesn’t know what it is yet.

    ****

    The Past, Hamptons, Home.

    As Jaqueline makes her way near the kitchen, Jacqueline takes a quick dive to one of the walls when she hears men’s voices. Jacqueline carefully puts herself where she can hear what is being said without anyone noticing her. Jacqueline listens to her Father Richard talking with some of his business associates in their kitchen. She peeps around the corner to see a group of men holding glasses, some drinking, and some laughing in their talks.

    Jacqueline finds their talks boring and prepares to head back upstairs. Just as she begins to tiptoe away from the kitchen, Jacqueline stops upon hearing her Mother Monica’s name mentioned.

    Steve’s deep voice booms heartily, "So, Richard, I have to say, I’m impressed by your marriage to Monica.

    Oh, before I go much further, she’s still at that spa resort, right?"

    In business like response, Richard’s voice echoes down the hall for Jacqueline to hear, "How are you impressed by my marriage with Monica, Steve?

    And yes, she’ll be coming back tomorrow from the resort."

    Steve winks with one eye then with a crooked smile voices, "Well, Rich, it’s just awfully generous of you to marry a woman with baggage. You know, who already has a kid. She’s used property. Come on. You’re a good-looking guy. You got the wealth to attract whoever you want. I mean. Why settle?

    You could have done much better. I don’t think I would have married to get acquainted and raise some other guy’s baby! I mean, I would have fucked her good, but not marry her."

    Chuckles from the other men are heard by Jacqueline from where she is hiding.

    Jacqueline breathes in sharply, they make it sound like a bad thing that Richard isn’t my Father for real. Wait! He’s not my real Father! Is it a bad thing? Who is my real Father?

    Jacqueline’s thoughts are interrupted by Richard’s confident and assertive tone. "Well Steve, I didn’t settle. Monica is absolutely stunning.

    Unlike your wife, Steve, mine makes other men do a double take. She throws men off their game, and she knows it. She’s sharp as any of you and handles people to her will until she gets what she wants. Not only that, but my business has taken off since I landed her Father’s money by marrying her."

    Steve remains silent, he knows better than to cross the line again with Richard. Now he has gotten a verbal whipping from Richard in front of the others. This making Steve look like less than a man. He retreats in quiet as he knows Richard or Monica can easily ruin him if they wanted.

    Still hidden away from those gathered in the kitchen, Jacqueline goes to crouching on all fours on the cold designer tile floor. She crawls a little closer. She raises her body but, stays kneeling on top of her legs. With clenched fists, staring straight ahead, Jacqueline keeps trying to make sense of what she just heard in the kitchen that bothers her the most. My not real Father does not love Mother. He only thinks of her money and her looks. He only sees her as someone to get more money. What does ‘fuck’ mean?

    Who is my real Father? Will my real Father one day come take Mother and me away from this life for love?

    Jacqueline clenches her tiny fists and rubs the cold tile floor angrily with her fists. She doesn’t know how to express her anger about being a kid not wanted. She is confused about her Mother not married for love.

    ****

    The Present, Jacqueline’s Apartment.

    Sitting up, Jacqueline opens her eyes. Going through memories of her Mother’s relationship with her stepfather leaves her feeling bitter. Still, she senses she is on the right path for figuring out what are the foundations of her nightmares.

    But, in later years I figured it something out. If my parents didn’t marry solely out of love, then did true love even exist? What is it like to be adored without needing money to prove your worth in being loved? Definitely no love there between those two. Definitely no real help in clearing up my difficulty in dealing with my nightmares.

    Jacqueline goes on to remembers some more qualities about her Mother. Mother being business like in her personal relationship with me; not being the one I learned from on how to care and being emotionally present to people. The nannies doing that loving part for me. Not my Mother. I guess she loved me in her own way. Darn, it sure makes life hard though when one has a Mother like I do.

    Jacqueline going through other memories involving her stepfather. Jacqueline grinning from memories about Richard making her feel better than her Mother. Richard paying attention to me was so wonderful. He made me feel special when I was in his company when young. I liked many of the conversations I had with him when I was little.

    She gets the sense she is on the right path of getting answers to what’s driving her nightmares. Jacqueline remembers the way Richard’s business associates had thought of her. I was and still angry about those he is in business with. So, I am baggage to be dealt with, an extra burden they had said. But, I got hand it to Richard. He sure knows how to put those business associates in their place. Yes, I sure do like that Richard spoke up about Mother. But, not so much about me. More about his desire for Mother. I just happen to be part of the package deal if he wanted to be with Mother. But, he did make me feel good around him at times.

    Jacqueline recalling her Mother’s manner of manipulating persons for business reasons. Why should I expect special treatment from Mother? I can’t remember anybody in her life where she is just in it for the relationship. All her relationships which I can remember have to do with what is in it for her. In some manner, each of her relationships are for advancing Mother’s driven desire to be successful. Mother’s successful driven manner coming from the way Grandfather demanded success from Mother.

    Jacqueline thinking, what was Grandfather’s influence with Mother? What had Grandfather done to guarantee Mother ended up the way she is with Richard and people? What was Grandfather’s pay day for making Mother this way? What did he get in negotiating his daughter being married to Richard?

    I think I remember…

    ****

    The past, Home, Hamptons

    Jacqueline is in her first year of Green Meadow middle school, a prestigious private school. Monica’s Father Maxell and her Mother Maxine show up to a gathering at the Hampton’s estate being hosted by Richard and Monica. Richard, Monica and Jacqueline’s Grandparents stroll to where they are in a semi private lavish manicured lawn area of the mansion estate.

    Unknown to them, Jacqueline is quietly following them while staying hidden. She is curious what they will be talking about since they had insisted that she stay away from their adult talks. Monica and Richard had even offered for Jacqueline to go spend some time shopping for her favorite designer clothes and shoes. This had peaked Jacqueline’s interest to stay as she politely declined the offer. She had given Monica and Richard some lame reasons for staying at the mansion.

    As she follows the group, she sees her Grandfather walk off with Richard. She notices her Mother and Grandmother stay to exchange heated not so well-hidden barbs at each other. As much as Jacqueline is curious about what her Mother and Grandmother are so angry with each other about, she is more curious about what her Grandfather and Richard are going to talk about. She is quietly following her Grandfather talking with Richard. She notices when they stop their walking to face each other and continue their talk. She finds a hiding area on the estate where she can get close enough to hear what they are talking about. She finds her place and

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