Shards of Illusion

By Ceanmohrlass

Let us none forget the others... we had drawn blood and pressed our bloody thumbs together, we had sworn it... we swore in blood, why have you forgotten me...WHY?
Screaming as she fights to wake up, Maylea begs for forgiveness... “I haven’t, I swear it! I swear it!” Tripping over her backpack, she lands hard on the old rug on the wooden floor.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ceanmohrlass
• Release date: Apr 1, 2015
• ISBN: 9781311526694

Ceanmohrlass

Ceanmohrlass is a retired grandmother who has been writing novels for her family and friends for over 20 years.She is the family genealogist, and writing the family history has only increased the passion for writing.Ceanmohrlass resides in Texas and is currently working on three new novels.

Book preview

Shards of Illusion

Copyright 2010 Ceanmohrlass Jana Robison

Published by Ceanmohrlass Jana Robison at Smashwords

Smashwords Edition License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

About the Author

Other books by Ceanmohrlass

Chapter One

Let us none forget the others... we had drawn blood and pressed our bloody thumbs together, we had sworn it... we swore in blood, why have you forgotten me...WHY?

Screaming as she fights to wake up, Maylea begs for forgiveness... I haven’t, I swear it! I swear it! Tripping over her backpack, she lands hard on the old rug on the wooden floor. The voice finally grows quiet, as she scrambles to the window of her little bedroom. Staring out into the darkness, she sees only the light from the moon as it streaks across the waves...

Tonight was the worst dream yet, she had wished only for some rest, but the voices in her dreams would not stop. For the first time in her young life, Maylea begins to wonder about her own sanity. Surely she isn’t sinking into the psychosis that she had watched her mother fall into? Maylea softly cries out, Why is this happening again?

Two years... It had been two years since Maylea had last heard those voices... Two years that she had been so busy trying to protect her mother from her aunt Taylor McBride. Taylor had long wanted Kristina committed, but Maylea refused to help her aunt in that mission... Two years Maylea had fought Taylor in vain, only to realize Taylor had been right all along. Maylea had been forced to accept that Kristina was a threat to herself and Maylea...Two years of struggle and pain down the drain...

The harsh morning light slugs Maylea’s eyes, as the alarm clock brings her to. Showered and dressed, Maylea suddenly notices her reflection in the mirror. Dark circles under her eyes, and her hair flat when wet, she looks much older than her years this morning. Somberly she pulls her hair into the usual ponytail and tries not to cry, as she reaches for her keys... How am I supposed to be able to make it through today? Maylea whispers.

The cold metal pen grasped tightly in her fingers, Maylea signs the last of the paperwork. Happy 18th birthday young lady... I’m sorry it has to be such a sad one for you, the lawyer says softly. You have a trust fund that will be apportioned out to you according to the schedule, and here is the first check. Your land and home in Hawaii is being held in estate for you, and you will receive the full proceeds from the sale.

Maylea feels numb as she hands over the pages she has just signed. The lawyer accepts them, checking to make sure each area is properly initialed, and signed. Seeing it all in order, he places the forms into the folder, and lays the folder in front of him on his desk. He reminds Maylea that Kristina’s parcel of land in the UK still needs addressed. She nods looking lost, and he feels sorry for her. It’s too much to deal with at such a tender age.

The lawyer quickly states that they can discuss the rest when she’s feeling better, for now nothing is required of her for it. The lawyer, sensing that she has taken all she is able, is ready to end the meeting. Smiling he says, Now, you let me know where to send the tuition fees. She nods once again and stands up, finally letting it sink in that she’s alone. Thank you. I’ll make my final decision tomorrow and call you, Maylea says in a daze.

Walking out into the bright sunset to her little golf cart, Maylea suddenly feels a little ill. Today she should have been celebrating the beginning of her adult life. The rumbles and gurgles in her stomach grow stronger, as Maylea pulls the golf cart up to the far side of the beach cafe. She walks in the side door, making her way past children begging their mother for candy from the machines. Opening the inner door, she waits on the hostess to return to seat her.

Hey Maylea! Girl, I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, are you doing okay? Trisha says, just trying to be polite. Yeah, I’m okay. Can I get a table out back? Maylea says softly. Trisha nods, pointing to the little table by the rail before she dashes off. A large group has just arrived, and is waiting to be seated at a table inside. Trisha knows that her tips will be better with the large group, and she hastily hands off Maylea’s ticket to the new girl. The new waitress shyly takes Maylea’s order then brings her a fruit roll punch and a lobster hot dog.

Maylea can’t seem to focus and her gaze is held by the waves hitting the shore below her. She just picks at her food and sips her fruit punch, trying to figure out how to go on. She hadn’t been forcing herself to cope with the loss of her mother. She had to move on now though, it was time. Maylea leaves her money on the table, and heads home just as the streetlights kick on.

Walking out onto her little apartment balcony in the dark, she fusses under her breath. Leaning down with her elbows on the rail, Maylea sighs, Happy 18th birthday, sure... Why did you leave me Mom? The moon is just bright enough to see the waves hit the black beach and roll back. Although the sounds of the frogs lessen it some, she can still hear the waves from her balcony. The taste of salt touches her lips, as the memories flow down her tanned cheek, but she doesn’t bother to wipe them away.

Maylea reaches for her little notebook. It’s time to write again, but she isn’t ready to read the earlier entries yet. She writes down how angry she is about what is happening in her life. She’s scared about hearing the voices when she dozes off, and she can’t explain the dreams. She can’t explain the way her mother had acted this summer either. Kristina had just stopped communicating with Maylea one day, and was constantly on the phone in her room, with her door locked. Maylea couldn’t hear her mother’s voice well, and didn’t know who she was talking to all the time. Maylea writes down all the bizarre things that had happened, trying to list every detail that she could remember.

Tears drop onto the page, but Maylea simply wipes them away, and keeps writing about the change in her mother’s personality this summer. Maylea’s friends had noticed it long before Maylea would admit it, and they distanced themselves from her shortly after she did. Only Carla had stayed by her side, and she seemed to be unfazed by Kristina’s erratic behavior. Maylea’s Aunt Taylor had come to their home one day out of the blue, and introduced herself to Maylea. That had been the weirdest day of all.

Kristina had been Maylea’s mother for only 11 years, but Maylea had grown to truly love her. She admitted now that she was the last to notice just how bizarre her mother’s behavior had become. The decision to sign the paperwork that would allow Taylor to have Kristina committed and evaluated, ripped at Maylea’s stomach. It had taken Taylor 22 months to convince Maylea to accept the truth. Maylea had become violently ill at the office, and it took two hours for her to actually sign the paperwork, making Taylor frantic. When they finally got in the car to retrieve Kristina, Maylea had to hold her face in the breeze of the open window, in order to make it back to the house.

Maylea and her social worker had arrived at her home, but Maylea was afraid to get out of the car. Taylor arrived just after the officials showed up to retrieve Kristina, but Kristina could not be found. The search for Kristina in the coming days concluded when a surfer was pulled astray by the waves. The surfer had ended his ride among the sharp rocks of an overhanging cliff. The search for the surfer had returned two bodies, one of them Kristina. Maylea was devastated... That had been two weeks before Maylea’s 18th birthday.

The first few nights Kristina was missing, Maylea was held at a foster home in fear for her safety. There was suspicion that Kristina had been murdered, and a social worker was hired to watch over Maylea until an investigation could begin. On Maylea’s second night in the foster home, the dreams began returning in force. Maylea tried to hide the fact that she had begun to hear the voices again.

The voices were strong, and Maylea could actually feel the breeze as she remembered standing next to the children... The voices always began the same way. Sounds of the children singing a silly rhyme, a few screams of excitement then the chants would begin. Locked deep in her dream, Maylea’s lips moved along with the chant... Friends are we today, tonight, friends are we for all our life, shall one not remember me, my voice will ever haunt thee... Then a strange feeling would come over her, and she could hear a scream...

Gasping for air and wiping the sweat from her forehead, Maylea had felt a massive weight pressing the life out of her! Fear gripped her as she heard the chants over, and over... A young girl in the bunk bed above Maylea asked her if she was sick. Maylea was too afraid to say anything however; she could only cough and pretend to fall back asleep. Maylea could never let anyone know the dreams were back. It was not something she was ever supposed to tell anyone...

Maylea had pressed her pillow to her wet face and cried softly. Memories had begun to return of when she had first moved here to Hawaii with Kristina. Maylea had been nervous the first night, and had opened up to Kristina about the strange dreams she was having. In return, Kristina had whipped her fiercely and told her she was never, ever to tell anyone about the dreams, or they would take her away! Maylea suddenly remembers the burn of the bitter orange liquid on her tongue. Her new mother had made her drink it every night, for the first few months on the island. Kristina had told her it was her special vitamin mixture. The strange dreams had stopped, but then Maylea couldn’t remember anything about that first year in the new house.

When Maylea woke up the third day in the foster home, her social worker was waiting to see her. The social worker told Maylea that a moving crew had removed Kristina’s belongings in the middle of the night, leaving nothing for Maylea to claim as her own. They had only left her one big box of her own clothing, and a small box with a few items she had on her shelf. Maylea didn’t really own much more than that. There were a few photos of Maylea and Kristina, a couple photos of Maylea with her friend Carla at the beach, and a few reading books. Her whole life had been gathered up into two boxes...

Afraid to stay all alone at the now empty house, Maylea had contacted the lawyer. The lawyer had arranged for Maylea to stay in a tiny, old 2-story apartment on the beach. Kristina owned the apartment before she had bought the house for herself and Maylea to live in. She had been renting the apartment out, but the tenants had long since moved away. Maylea had agreed that it was better than being homeless, and it was definitely better than going back to the home they had shared.

The next-door neighbor had showed Maylea the little apartment, and gave her a bed that her own daughter had left behind when she had gotten married. Maylea had needed everything from a shower curtain, to window blinds. The lawyer had quickly released some money for her to get settled in, and Maylea’s friends gave her a few items to help her out as well. It didn’t feel like home, but she could not handle being in the old house without Kristina. Maylea had cried the entire first night in her apartment, feeling abandoned and completely alone. The old house had been put up for sale and there was an offer being negotiated, so there was no other choice.

Maylea had turned in her notice at her job at the hotel, and had already completed her last day there. She had only intended to take the summer off, beginning on the day Kristina would be committed. Maylea’s intentions had been to deal with Kristina’s issues, hoping her mother could be cured with medication, and then resume their life. Maylea knew the inheritance money would hold her for a while, if she was careful at least. She had to figure out right away where to go to school, but she had a horrible headache that seemed to come every day now. The throbbing pain was infringing on the short time she had to concentrate on the packets she had received.

Maylea had to make a decision now; she had applied for a university in England but had been turned down. She had however, been well received by both the university in Scotland and another in France, as well as two in Italy and one in Germany. With all that had happened, Maylea had decided that she needed to leave Hawaii, even though it had been her home for the last 11 years. She had thought about France because Carla was returning there, but she kept being drawn back to the allure of Scotland.

As the sound of the waves float into Maylea’s window, she reverts back to the paranoia that she found herself in often lately. Maylea closes her eyes and tries to remember meeting Kristina, but as usual, nothing comes to her. It’s so strange that Maylea has absolutely no memories of the adoption, and she can’t imagine why. Kristina had received Maylea in a private adoption from a dear friend, and even Maylea could not uncover the actual details. Kristina had promised Maylea that on her 18th birthday she would give her all the paperwork, and explain what had really happened to her mother and father. Now Maylea would never know.

The day after Kristina’s body was found, Kristina’s sister Taylor had taken her own share of the money in a private meeting with the lawyer. Taylor then immediately married a man named Devon Thornton according to the lawyer. Taylor had not told Maylea anything about getting married, and Maylea was unable to reach her. Taylor had then quickly left town with her new husband, and even the social worker stated she could not locate Taylor, which was a lie.

Maylea was trying to find out her birth information, and she had hoped Taylor would be able to help her. The social worker stated that for some reason, all of the adoption documents appeared sealed by the courts in England. There was simply nothing else she could do, to help Maylea in her search for the truth. Maylea had no reason to think she was being lied to, and she had hoped that Kristina had left documents for her with the lawyer, but she had not. The social worker received her secret payment from Taylor then quickly disappeared as well.

BANG BANG BANG! The heavy knocks on the door jars Maylea out of her thoughts. Her pen clanks on the floor then there is only silence. It’s too early in the morning for anyone to be dropping by, and she’s quite sure that her aunt Taylor is done with her. She tiptoes over to the door to peer through the viewer, but no one is out there. As she sneaks up the stairs to peek out her bedroom window, she suddenly hears the door being pounded again. Or is that her heart beating so loudly? Maylea runs up the last few steps and opens her bedroom door. She winces as she feels a pain in her temple. Suddenly, the voices begin to return and she whispers out, begging for them to stop.

The sun is beginning to rise, as Maylea leans a little way forward to peer out the window. She does so, just in time to see an old man slowly getting into a small car. She keeps watching, squinting from the worsening headache as he drives away. Maybe it was a mistake; he must have seen the numbers on the apartment finally and realized he was there in error. Inhaling deeply, she tries to quell the panic attack she knows is coming. The sun hurts her eyes, and she runs to the shower to help ease her breathing.

The heat and humidity have risen with the sun, and Maylea feels the perspiration on her upper lip. She folds the college dorm forms into the envelope to deliver to her lawyer. Sliding her feet into the cool rubber flip-flops, she pulls her waist length, dirty blonde hair into a top ponytail. As her fingertips touch the cold metal of the keys, she notices a piece of paper sticking out from under the bottom of the door... Forgetting about the keys, Maylea gently pulls the paper into the room and holds it up to read... ‘Amanda,’- but the name had been crossed out and replaced with -‘Maylea, for you...happy birthday’- is all it says.

No one signed it? The paper crinkles as she turns it over twice. No other information... Much too strange, she thinks. Who would have left this note... one of her friends? No, they had been avoiding her since Kristina’s death. All of her friends had hugged her at the funeral, but she had been so shaken by her mother’s death that the birthday party had been cancelled. The party had not been rescheduled, and life went on... now this?

Maylea lays the paper on the table, absentmindedly picks up her keys to the golf cart and opens the door, tripping over the box as she sees it. Her eyes dart quickly left and right as she reaches for the box then she jumps back inside. The name ‘Amanda’ is written on the box but is not crossed out. No one had called her Amanda since she had come to live with Kristina... Kristina had immediately had her name legally changed, and no mention was ever allowed again of the name Amanda. Strange how she only just recalled that fact...

Maylea carefully lays the box on the little table in the tiny apartment. She can’t work up the nerve to open it just yet. Pouring a glass of tea, she looks around the small space she now calls home. Since moving from the old house she had shared with her mother, she had begun to enjoy it here. She was almost sad to be leaving, but since the voices had come thundering back it was impossible to stay here alone now.

Maylea’s attention returns to the mysterious box on the little table. The box is very simply wrapped in brown Kraft paper, worn and a bit bungled up. The tape has begun to disintegrate so much that she barely has to pull and the box opens. Inside, under a few loose pieces of brown paper and a little gift paper, is a small purple purse. Maylea reaches for it... It’s worn, dirty and the clasp is set open. A memory pounces on her that she had one just like it as a small girl; she had received it for her birthday... She quickly drops the purse, jumping back as the voices begin again... No...NO! she cries out, it was just a dream, it wasn’t real... Oh; what the hell is happening to me?

Maylea cries out in anguish, terrified at ‘remembering’ what ‘they’ had told her was only a dream. But was it just a dream? She could remember so vividly the smell of the heather, the sound of the birds nearby, the chants of the children... How could it all be a dream? She could physically feel those memories... No- she was losing it... she was going to end up just like Kristina! Maylea runs from the apartment, down the path and toward the palm trees, feeling sick to her stomach... ‘Oh help me...’ she cries. She throws up over the edge of a boulder, turns away and sinks down near the waterfall, feeling the mist on her arms that cradle her head...

As the sun bakes down on her, a couple of hikers make their way past her. The boy notices her lying there, and asks if she is okay... Maylea doesn’t seem to hear him. Worried, he asks her again, which pulls her from her stupor, but she can only nod. He shrugs his shoulders, grabs his girlfriend’s hand and leads her farther up the path, leaving Maylea all alone. Raising her face to the mist, and feeling her head begin to clear, Maylea opens her eyes. The familiar view of the spot she often sat at to just think was reassuring to her. She stands up hearing her stomach complaining, and walks slowly back toward her apartment.

‘I’m sick too, I have to be...’ she whispers. A call to her doctor, to tell them she just had a very bad panic attack, brings the desired help. The doctor calls her a prescription in for some sleeping pills and heavier anxiety medicine. The doctor explains that all that has happened to her recently, and the fact that she is leaving for another country soon, is the cause. The doctor quickly adds that she should not worry too much about it, and Maylea feels relieved. Climbing in the golf cart, she leaves to pick up her medication.

When Maylea arrives home, she again takes notice of the box, and is stunned that she had not just imagined it as part of the attack. Curiosity soon takes hold. After the medication has calmed her down, she finds the nerve to remove the little purse again. Suddenly, she’s so sleepy, she wonders aloud if maybe she’s dreaming now. Maybe it’s all just a dream- the purse, the panic attack, everything... Maylea slowly sinks down into the deep bean bag chair, near the low open window. The calming slush of the waves improves her mood, and soon lures her into a deep, sound sleep.

The sound of the waves gives way to the sounds of a man’s gruff voice...Tae-flicht? Ye hae tae lae- it isnae safe haur anymair! Fa is thes bairn?...The man stares at her, his thick eyebrows furrowing deeply toward his nose. She sees the scowl on the man’s face, it frightens her, and she begins to cry out! Suddenly, a heavyset woman shoves the man behind her, takes Amanda’s hand and leads her outside. The man settles down, and is now talking quietly to an unseen party...

RING RING Her phone pierces into her dream and Maylea reaches for it... Hello? Maylea says in a fog. The loud reply hurts her ear, Hey! Why are you still at your place? Maylea struggles to listen, saying Who is this? The party on the line yells, Are you okay? You do remember we have a going away party tonight, right? I mean, geez Maylea, are you just going to stand us up or what? Maylea opens her eyes and leans close to the window, pulling the heavy curtain aside. She is hit with the sunset in all its beauty... Crap! she screams, Oh crap! I am so sorry Carla! I will be there in 10 minutes I promise! Her head is throbbing as she forces herself to stand up. It takes her a minute to steady herself then she rushes to the shower, ties on her bathing suit, grabs her flip-flops, keys and towel, and runs outside.

It’s about time the guest of honor shows up! the guests all laugh, as Maylea makes her grand entrance. Maylea is still fuzzy brained, having missed the whole afternoon lost in her dream. The dreams are back, but Maylea is determined