The Maze: ATCOM, #1

By Jennifer Lowery

...A game of survival tests their will and their love.

A mission she can't forget.

The first female operative for the counterterrorism unit known as ATCOM, Atalanta Devayne is haunted by a former mission gone wrong. That mission led to her imprisonment, torture, and ultimate retirement, along with her loss of faith in the man she'd trust with her life.

Brings his vengeance...

Former Navy SEAL, Noah Kincaid, bears the responsibility of Attie's imprisonment and blames himself for not protecting her from drug lord Carlos Santiago. This time he won't fail her.

In a deadly game of survival.

Santiago has resurfaced and set up an elaborate plan to exact his revenge on Attie by taking her brother hostage. The only way to save him is by revisting the darkness of her past and relying on a man she can't trust. In a battle of life or death, Noah and Attie are put to the test. They must face challenges to overcome the past and accept their feelings for each other before the danger that tore them apart seperates them forever.

Content Warning: Sexual content

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jennifer Lowery
• Release date: Jun 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9781498949309

Book preview

Chapter 1

Noah heard the sounds before he reached the barn. From inside the open doors there came a series of thumps followed by a solid thud. The sequence changed and escalated. It had been a long time since he’d seen Attie, and the last hadn’t been pleasant. He didn’t like the situation that brought him here. Attie was going to hate it even more.

Girding himself for the task ahead, Noah stepped into the barn and leaned a shoulder against the door, silently watching the woman attacking an old, worn leather punching bag hanging by chains from the rafters a few feet away.

Her back toward him, she focused on the bag. To her credit she was precise and agile, not once missing the bag, and landing a solid blow with fist or foot every time.

The sight of her stirred forbidden desires. Attie’s beauty had caused plenty of upheaval in the academy. A spark came from inside and made her glow with life. She was stubborn and damned irritating when she set her mind to something, but that was Attie. Her inner strength impressed even the hardest of men. No one could deny that, not after what she’d endured in South America.

Not when she blamed him for the death of a fellow agent.

Watching her, he could see well-honed muscle in each movement. She had healed completely, but Noah could see the surgery scar on her leg below the black barely-cover-your-ass workout shorts she wore. A sleek, red ponytail hung to her waist and swayed with each movement. The underlying sensuality in her movements wasn’t lost on him. Hell, it had drawn him to her. Her sharp intellect made her a woman unlike any other.

Envisioning this slender, athletic woman undercover as arm candy wasn’t a far stretch of the imagination.

Attie spun around to face him. Her emerald green eyes met his. Her chest heaved from exertion, stretching the fabric of her tank top taut across her breasts. He forced his eyes back up to hers.

What the hell are you doing here, Kincaid? she demanded, her voice wavering slightly.

I need to talk to you.

Her eyes grew wary. Guarded. We have nothing to say to each other.

Noah let her militant tone roll off him. It’s about Brendan.

Her head snapped up. What about him?

There was no way to soften the blow, so he didn’t try. Attie wouldn’t appreciate it if he did. He’d never been anything but straight with her.

He’s been kidnapped.

Attie backed up a step. She turned her attention to the punching bag. Her first punch missed and she let out a sound of frustration.

Attie?

Her pace increased, her movements more intense.

That isn’t all.

Still she refused to look at him.

Santiago has him and he wants you.

A strangled cry escaped her throat and she whipped around to face him. How can you mention that name to me?

I have no choice.

She shook her head. Backing up, she faced him from behind the bag and started jabbing.

Noah straightened from the doorframe, stripped down to his t-shirt and walked over to the swinging bag to stop it with his hands.

Attie continued to abuse it, glaring at him. Get out of my way, Kincaid.

He ignored her and held the bag steady.

She swung, her fist grazing his forearm. Not by accident.

Give me a minute, will you? she ground out, hitting with more force.

We don’t have a minute.

She ducked around the bag. Damn you. She kicked the bag hard, then threw a jab at him.

Noah allowed the first blow, but not the next.

She hit him with a series of punches and kicks.

He sparred with her until she was exhausted, letting her work the demons out of her system so she could think rationally. She had always needed an outlet, unable to keep things bottled up. Mostly it came in the form of temper, but ATCOM had trained her to control it. He understood her need to lash out against the fate being delivered to her. If he could change it, he would. He would do anything to save Attie the pain she suffered.

Finally, he swept her legs out from under her. She landed on her back in a cloud of dust. He moved in fast, dropping down to straddle her thighs. He locked her hands above her head to still her movements, feeling her tremble beneath him.

When he looked down in the depths of Attie’s cat eyes, he saw pain shimmering so deep it seemed bottomless. Below that lay fear she wouldn’t admit to, but couldn’t hide. Silently, he cursed Santiago and vowed to complete the mission ATCOM was sending him in to do. Hell, he welcomed it.

This wasn’t the Attie he knew. The woman who’d become the first female agent in the history of ATCOM was fearless, determined, confident, headstrong. Nothing stopped her from getting what she wanted. She would go over, around or through to accomplish a goal.

Finished? he asked, knowing he couldn’t ask about her fears or offer protection against them because she’d never allow it. Holding her ground was one of Attie’s vices and something she did very well. Too well. She had yet to realize leaning on someone wasn’t a sign of weakness.

Move so I can get up. Her voice caught and his gaze dropped to her mouth. How many times had he thought about kissing those beautiful, stubborn lips? How close had they come to finding out if the chemistry sizzling between them was real? How close had he come to losing his career for just one kiss?

Too damn close.

Noah... she murmured and he knew. Knew no matter what wall sat between them, she still felt it. What? No, get off me.

Noah rolled to his feet and held out a hand. She accepted and he pulled her to her feet. Immediately she withdrew, brushing off her backside. She picked up her sweatshirt off the floor and slipped it over her head, keeping her face averted. He retrieved his shirt and shrugged it on.

Tell me, she said, facing him, all traces of intimacy gone. Her eyes still carried that haunted look, but she was ready to listen now.

Brendan pretended to be talking to you while he delivered Santiago’s message to me.

What?

Santiago won’t release Brendan until you show up at his specific coordinates. He’ll kill him if you don’t show. He gave you seventy-two hours.

Noah watched her reaction, seeing the impact his words had on her. To her credit, she remained standing on legs he knew were threatening to collapse.

Give me the coordinates. Her voice didn’t betray her emotions. Only her eyes did.

He knew better than that. She would try and go without him. His next words weren’t going to settle well.

No. We go as a team.

* * * *

A team? Was he crazy?

Attie shook her head. That option had been eliminated the day she retired. Did he really think she would follow a man who’d caused the death of an agent and ruined any chance of putting Carlos Santiago in prison for the rest of his miserable life? Noah Kincaid’s decision had destroyed everything she’d worked for, suffered for, and all because he didn’t trust her.

I’m going alone. That’s what Carlos expects, and that’s what he’ll get.

As she said it, something cold and familiar spiraled through her. Carlos Santiago was the cause of her nightmares. He hadn’t only tortured her in that cell for three days. He’d made her life a living hell for months prior. But no one knew that except her and Carlos. That was the way it was going to stay. What had happened to her had no bearing on the here and now.

Old memories surfaced and Attie had to tamp them down before speaking again. ATCOM had taught her restraint, and she did her best to exercise it right now. For Brendan’s sake she would do this, even if it meant facing Carlos again.

Attie shuddered.

We’re going together. I need Santiago to have eyes on you so I can get Brendan out of there.

Attie shook her head. This isn’t your problem, it’s mine.

Something flickered across his face but he masked it too quickly for her to read. Take it or leave it. Noah turned and walked away.

She glared at Noah’s back. She remembered a time when she would have followed him into the trenches of Hell if he’d asked. He’d been strong, steady, and reliable. A man she respected. He hadn’t singled her out or treated her any different from the men in the academy. He demanded as much out of her as the others and she’d given it one hundred percent. The road hadn’t been easy, but becoming an agent was all she’d ever wanted to do. And she’d done it on her own steam, not because her brother and uncle were there before her.

Pain knifed through her chest as she watched his retreating back. She’d trusted him once. Until that fateful day in a steamy South American jungle when he’d stopped trusting her and made a decision that changed the course of their lives forever.

Noah Kincaid had started the chain reaction that got Seth killed, and she wasn’t about to let him get her brother killed too. Teamwork required trust and that was something they’d lost.

Furious with him for withholding, she stormed after him.

"I retired from ATCOM. You can’t do this to me. I am not one of your agents anymore," she shouted. Damn it. Seeing him again brought old feelings to the surface.

He turned to face her. No, you’re not an agent anymore, he said, and for the record I don’t want you to come along. I didn’t even want you involved, but Santiago won’t have it any other way. He wants you, Attie, and that should scare the hell out of you. We either work together on this or you let me take my chances with Santiago alone.

She stopped short, her anger abating. He was right. She was scared. She knew what Santiago was capable of, but Noah wasn’t going to give her Brendan’s location and she couldn’t go without it. Time was running out.

She hadn’t been able to save Seth, but she could damn well save her brother. If it meant teaming up with a man who’d betrayed her, then so be it.

For the record, she said, repeating his earlier statement, I don’t trust you either. I won’t take orders from you and I won’t rely on you for anything. What we had in the past is over. We’ll go together, but only because there is no other choice.

Noah stared at her for a moment before nodding. Any way you want it, as long as we get moving. I’d like to be en route to Colorado within the hour. The chopper is on standby.

Attie sent him one last, angry look before brushing past him. I’ll be ready in fifteen.

Chapter 2

Noah still refused to give her the coordinates. They were in the Colorado Rocky Mountains, which was all she knew. She could do nothing without him and suspected he liked keeping her at a disadvantage, although it drove her crazy.

Silence stretched between them as they made their way up the mountain over rocky terrain and through dense forest.

Attie was right at home, having spent most of her life in the mountains. She loved the clean, crisp air, the rugged beauty, and demanding terrain. She knew Noah was just as comfortable since he taught wilderness survival at the academy.

Irritated about taking the back seat to him, she glared at his back. The narrow, overgrown path forced them to walk single file. The pack he wore added bulk to his already massive frame, making it impossible to see past him. She was getting tired of seeing him. The way he moved with silent ease, the sureness in his step, the pure masculine grace.

Needing a distraction, she reached into the pocket of her parka, pulled out an energy bar, and opened it.

Without looking back, Noah asked, Got another one of those handy?

Attie held the bar between her teeth and reached into her pocket for the other one.

Here. She tossed it to him.

He caught it in midair without missing a step. Thanks.

Attie ate hers as her thoughts turned to Brendan and the man who held him. Santiago was no ordinary terrorist. He smuggled drugs into the States, but he had a darker side not many knew about. Those who did didn’t live to tell about it, with the exception of her. She had witnessed first-hand what kind of man he was and she had the scars to prove it, both physically and emotionally. Shaking herself out of the past, she stuffed the empty wrapper in her pocket and drilled imaginary holes between Noah’s shoulder blades. So many regrets. So much lost.

Watch your step.

Wha— Attie muttered at the same time she tripped over a raised tree root. She stumbled, cursed, and glared at Noah, who had stopped to turn and stare at her.

Regaining her balance, she snapped, I don’t need your help.

I figured you were too busy boring holes into my skull to notice.

Back, she corrected under her breath. We’re wasting time.

Noah gave her a long, measuring look. Is this how it’s going to be, Attie?

Her chin lifted.

Your hostility is going to make for a difficult trip.

She raised an eyebrow. I wanted to come alone.

Anger flickered in his eyes. Noah was a rock; he kept his emotions under control at all times. She’d been envious of his restraint once. Attracted to it. Now it annoyed her as much as it turned her on.

Why?

What do you mean why?

Why, Noah asked, his voice edged with steel, would you want to face Santiago alone?

The softly spoken question caught her so completely off guard she reared back. He knew what kind of man Santiago was. He would kill Brendan without blinking an eye if she didn’t follow his instructions. Noah’s presence only jeopardized her brother’s life.

How can you ask me that? she asked. With everything that has happened, how can you not know?

Noah’s expression hardened. All I know is that we’re in this together so you may as well deal with it. If we don’t work as one, none of us are going to get out alive.

She knew he was right, but couldn’t admit it. Wounds had been reopened when he showed up at her door, and they were still raw. She was barely keeping her fears at bay and being angry at Noah was an effective Band-Aid. But it wouldn’t last. The wounds had to heal and she had no idea how to do that. It was easier to stay angry and keep them at a distance. She didn’t want to remember how blue his eyes were or how comforting his presence was. There had been times in the field when she’d relied on him to get her through, but now she couldn’t do that.

Why you? she whispered, surprising both of them. Of all the agents, why you?

Noah met her gaze directly. Your brother trusts me.

Attie flinched. What had she expected? A confession? Noah was a professional. He never let emotion get in the way of a job. This wasn’t the time or place to settle the past between them.

Trust, she scoffed. Such a lethal word that cut in both directions. Will my brother’s ‘trust’ get him killed like it did Seth?

That’s not fair, he said quietly.

She was too angry to care. You cost me my mission and now Carlos has another shot at not only me, but my brother too.

He winced as if she’d struck him. The reaction surprised her, but didn’t lessen her anger.

I did what I thought was best for the safety of my agents, Noah said softly, revealing none of his feelings.

Well, you failed miserably in that, didn’t you? She pushed past him, needing to put distance between them. Noah cursed behind her, but she kept on going. Her insides churned. Seth was dead. Mission failed. She lost a fellow agent, and the bad guy got away.

She had felt nothing but out of control since her return from South America and she didn’t know how to get her life back. Brendan had been there to bring her back from the edge when she needed him most. If she screwed this up, she was going to lose him.

The trees parted. Attie stopped short to stare up the face of a steep, rocky cliff.

Noah came up behind her and did the same. We’re going to have to climb. He shrugged out of his pack.

She frowned down at him where he crouched by her legs. What are you doing?

Lightening your load. Give me anything that has weight out of your pack.

I don’t think so.

He looked up at her. I can climb with more weight.

She glared at him. I’ll carry my own pack. I don’t need your help.

He squeezed the bridge of his nose. This is going to be a steep climb. You need to concentrate on keeping your footing instead of the weight on your back.

I carried one of my teammates out of ‘enemy territory’ in training, remember? I passed with flying colors by your standards. My pack is much lighter than St. Klare was.

This isn’t the academy.

"I can carry you up this damn mountain."

Scanning the slope in front of him Noah said tightly, I’ll go up first. Get your gear.

* * * *

Attie watched Noah leap onto the rocky slope, get a foothold, and inch his way upward. He moved with ease and agility up the face of the cliff. Of course, he made it look easy, but she knew better. This would be no simple task. Taking a deep breath, she reached up and latched onto the rock.

Steadily they climbed, with Attie following the path Noah chose. Occasionally a pebble would come loose and bounce off her head.

Darkness closed in around them. Attie could no longer feel her fingers. Fitting them into tiny grooves became increasingly difficult. She could see the top and paused a moment on her perch as Noah swung over the edge.

Legs tight from exertion, her pack feeling fifty pounds heavier than when she’d started, arms aching from strain, Attie secured a foothold and pushed upward.

She tucked her numb fingers into a small groove above her head, but misjudged its depth and her fingers slipped. With a cry she teetered on the edge, fighting to keep her balance, but her pack proved to be more dangerous than she’d thought. Its weight tilted her backward.

An iron grip caught her wrist.

She looked up to see Noah lying above her, holding her by one arm. His expression was calm, his gaze steady.

Get a foothold, Attie, he instructed.

She twisted slightly and saw his jaw clench. As easily as possible, she shoved her toe in a crevice.

Got one.

On the count of three, push.

Okay.

Noah counted to three, and she pushed at the same time he pulled. Their combined effort landed her a foot over the ledge, flat on her stomach, with her legs hanging over.

Breathing deep and fast, she rolled into a sitting position and scooted away from the edge, drawing her knees up and locking her arms around them to stop her trembling.

He crouched beside her. You okay?

Without looking at him she shook her head. She’d almost fallen to her death and ruined everything. She was rusty, her skills not as honed as they’d been six months ago.

He squeezed her shoulder. There’s a clearing in the trees behind you we can set up camp in. Take your time.

He didn’t wait for her response before heading in that direction. Attie squeezed her eyes shut and took a couple calming breaths. It was some time before she was able to move closer to the fire Noah had built. Even then her legs shook and she couldn’t seem to slow her heart rate.

Sitting on the ground with her knees drawn up and her hands stretched toward the warmth of the fire, she tried to stop them from shaking. She had her back to Noah, staring into the flames, thinking of Brendan to distract herself from her near fatal mistake and the fact that she now owed Noah her life. Irony was a brutal thing.

Brendan had always been larger than life to her. He’d been more of a risk taker, taking up sky diving, rock climbing and flying. He loved to take her up in his Cessna and scare the hell out of her by cutting the engine midair and free falling until she couldn’t remain quiet anymore. When she gave in and screamed he’d start the engine and pull them up every time. She swore she wouldn’t go again, but found herself in the air with him the very next day.

Her brother had been there for her after she returned from South America, taking a leave of absence to help her through her recovery. He knew what she needed when the nightmares got too much and would spar with her to help her release the pent up energy. He always had a wisecrack to get her moving when her body ached from the torment of healing.

He tag-teamed with Uncle Jed to help her get through the tough times and she loved them both for it. But the things she suffered couldn’t be helped. The nightmares were not going away.

Closing her eyes, she wished Brendan was sitting next to her and they were in Uncle Jed’s kitchen bellyaching over his five-alarm chili that brought tears to their eyes and made their noses run from all the spices.

One way or another she would get him back. She would see Brendan again, his eyes sparkling with mischief, teasing her about the restrictions of being a girl to get her ire up and push her to be the best she could be. She had, by becoming the first woman to become an agent for ATCOM. Now she would use that training to help free him from a madman.

Fear of losing her brother clawed at her heart, causing a flood of anger to wash through her, along with a familiar restlessness.

Noah dropped down beside her and stared into the fire with her. Should I take off my coat and put on my boxing gloves?

Have them with you? she muttered, picking up a stick and throwing it into the fire.

Is that what you want, Attie? he asked softly.

Physical exercise was the only way she knew to alleviate the emotions Carlos evoked in her. Even now he had power over her and it was destroying her. She knew it, but couldn’t stop it. She tried to push the demons away, but they were always stronger than her. Pounding them out on a punching bag worked much better.

Brendan was usually there for her and that only made her more upset. Clenching her fists at her sides and said, Yes.

I have a better idea, he suggested. How about talking about it.

I’d rather you put on your gloves.

Your first response to things you’re unsure of is anger. Sometimes, the things that scare us don’t respond to anger.

Thank you, Dr. Freud. You don’t know what you’re talking about.

He was silent for a moment. Then he said, I know you’re running so fast you’ve stopped living.

She shot to her feet, fists clenched at her sides. You know nothing, Kincaid.

You can’t go on like this forever. Eventually your walls are going to fall and you’re going to need someone to be there when they do. I’m going to be there.

Shaking with anger, she said, It’ll be a cold day in Hell.

* * * *

They traveled at a good steady pace all the next day, searching for any clues that might hint toward Brendan’s having been there, but found none. Frustrating, but she expected nothing less from Santiago. His paranoia kept him sharp as a tack. If he wanted her brother hidden, then he would be. Still, she didn’t give up searching for something—anything—that would give her a jump on him.

A sudden wind picked up, whipping a strand of hair free from her ponytail. A chill cut straight through her. They stood on a rocky cliff overlooking a canyon. The sun had gone under hours ago, leaving only the gray, dreary sky of early nightfall. Rock sat all around them except for the cluster of tall pines at their back.

Noah was looking at the sky, eyes narrowed. See those clouds? He pointed at a cluster of dark, billowing swirls.

Attie followed his gaze and nodded.

Cumulus clouds building vertically like that mean a storm is approaching. We have to take cover.

Temp’s been dropping steadily.

Another warning. Come on.

As they turned and sprinted toward the pines, a strong wind blew past, followed by a crack of thunder. Their sprint turned into a run as it began to rain. She double-timed it in order to keep up with Noah’s long, powerful strides. The added weight of her pack made it difficult to keep up. The wind forced her back.

Two paces ahead, Noah veered right. Frowning, Attie followed. The rain was coming down hard now, making it difficult to see.

Squinting, she searched for Noah’s dark jacket and picked up her pace. He materialized out of the mist, grabbed her hand, and propelled her along with him at an exhausting pace. She felt the strain of the past two days. Her body ached from exertion and the demand that had been placed on it. Her muscles protested the movement as she pushed to keep up.

The wind whipped her hair free of its ponytail, blowing it around her face and into her eyes. Her breath puffed