Dreams of Desire 5: Dreams of Desire, #5

By Cassie Wright

~Volume 5 of the Dreams of Desire Serials ~

Everything Jessie thought she knew about the St. Claires was wrong.

Now her world is in free fall and she doesn't know where to turn. All her instincts and friends are telling her to walk away, to not follow Julian and Jace and risk her very life to help them.

She has a decision to make. Something must be sacrificed. Either she holds on to her friends, her life, everything that she knows and values - or she steps off the cliff, and follows the St. Claires on their perilous road to justice.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Cassie Wright
• Release date: Feb 6, 2014
• ISBN: 9781497735392

Book preview

Chapter 1

I open my eyes. The bedroom is dark, but I can tell that Julian is watching me. That we have both emerged from the Dream at the same moment. We lie there in the dark with only the sound of our breath between us. My mind's eye is still blinded by the white shine of our love, by that sphere of sunlight that held back the darkest of storms, but as the moments pass I grow acclimated to the dark. Begin to make out the contours of Julian's face. The swells of his body beneath the sheets. I realize that I'm holding my breath. He's back. My Julian. He's returned from the recesses of his own mind to claim his body, to claim his actions. To claim me.

He reaches out. Slowly. Hesitantly. He touches my hair, caresses it. I know he's naked beneath the sheets. I'm wearing a long tshirt and nothing else. My hair is still damp from the shower. My sex sore from the love we had made against the window not half an hour ago. But that feels like an age away. Another man, another version of myself. After what had just happened in our minds, I feel born anew. He caresses my hair and then trails his hand down to the back of my neck. The feel of his skin on mine sends a flash-fire of goosebumps down my body. His touch is warm. I'm open to him. No walls. No defenses. No words. Never have my eyes felt more like windows to my soul, and even though it's dark I know he can see into them. Still see that white light that burned away the pain.

That pulled him back from the abyss.

That saved our love.

Julian continues to move his hand as if discovering my body for the very first time. Traces with his fingertips the line of my clavicle. Up to my shoulder, then down my arm. His touch is fire. Sweet agony. My pulse is racing in my ears. I'm having trouble breathing smoothly. My breath keeps wanting to hitch, though whether to laugh or cry I can't tell. All I know is that I'm feeling joy. I'm feeling a joy such as I have never felt. Love lost and found. I'll never take him for granted, not after having come so close to losing him forever. It's a miracle that he's here. My Julian.

He moves his hand to my face. I close my eyes as he touches me. My jaw, my cheeks. The bridge of my nose, my brow. He runs his thumb over my lips, and I part them, kiss him gently.

I hear him stir. But still he controls himself. Like a diver poised a hundred feet above the ocean. Prepared to throw himself into the sky, but not yet ready to leap. Savoring the moment. The dizzying height.

Julian lowers his hand down my neck once more, down my chest to my breasts. My nipples are taut, almost painfully so. He runs his palm along the side of my breast, following the full curve. It feels like electric sparks trail behind his touch like the wake of a boat. He cups my breast. I want him to squeeze, to dull the ache. Instead he ghosts his palm over my nipple, moving it slowly in a circle so that the sensation teases, agonizes. I bite my lower lip. It's an exercise in control to not move. To not clutch his hand and press it hard against me.

Down my stomach. Now I turn onto my back. He rises up onto one elbow, and pulls up the hem of my shirt, exposing my skin. Lowers his face to kiss me. I feel his hair brush against the underside of my breasts, his lips searing my ribs, then down my stomach, past my belly button. I push my head back against the pillow. Close my eyes. Julian shifts farther down. Turns and slips between my legs. My sex is throbbing. He kisses me there, and I gasp. The sensation is magnified a thousand times. The pleasure a jolt. My body has never been this alive. This receptive. This hungry.

He kisses me again and again, and then presses closer. I clutch at the sheets, knot them in my fists. I can't control myself. I moan, let out a cry of pleasure. The darkness behind my eyelids flutters, swirls with eddies of color. Waves of ecstasy mount like a rising tide, ever more powerful. My body is moving of its own accord. I press my thighs against Julian's face, raise my hips. It's too much. My sense of self is dissolving beneath his tongue.

As delirious and amazing as it feels, I want him. I want to feel him inside me. I want to connect with him in the deepest way possible, so I reach down, breathing rapidly, and lift his face, pull him toward me. Even in the darkness I can sense his smile. He moves over me. His body rigid with muscle and need. But he's careful. As if afraid of crushing me, as if afraid that if he gives in fully to his desire he'll sweep the world away and us with it.

I part my legs. Reach up and move my hands down his sculpted chest. Hard muscle quivering as he holds himself above me. I feel him touch me between my legs, then slowly, terribly slowly slide inside. Oh my god, oh -

Words fail me. There is only Julian and myself. We're not in a Dream, but the walls could fall away, the darkness explode in light and I'd not know the difference. Love. Our love magnifies every movement, every connection. I feel him press against my whole length. Feel his lips on my own. We kiss, and our hunger is unleashed. Control slips. We devour each other, laughing as we do, smiling as he thrusts, till I can't focus on kisses any more and simply hold onto him, clutch him as a drowning woman might the remains of her shattered boat.

There is no end. There is no pause. Our pleasure builds. Our ecstasy grows and grows and I can't hold back. I cry out, over and over again. Julian is grunting, the sounds torn from the depths of his core, and I surge against him as he pounds into me. Over and over, our bodies becoming one, and as if by magic I see that white light begin to glow around us once more. I don't know if it's real or an illusion, but it's our love made manifest, our love given form. As our pleasure grows that white light does too, its intensity rising until it's blinding.

I close my eyes and still I see it. Love.

When we come, the moment seems to last for an eternity, both of us carried high and held up, our souls intertwined, our bodies connected, the moment of highest ecstasy erasing the lines between us so that we are one creature, one being, one vibrating, exploding center of pleasure.

We collapse.

Julian lies above me, his head on my shoulder, his breath coming in gasps. I can't catch my own breath. My chest is heaving. My core convulsing with the aftershocks, each as powerful as any orgasm. I hold him close. Hold him tight.

He moves his face to my ear.

I love you, Jessica Ford. His words send lightning through me. I turn to gaze at him. Tears brim in my eyes. Always the tears. I smile, choking back laughter, my happiness too much. I love you, he says again.

And I love you, Julian St. Claire. With all my heart.

We stare deep into each other's eyes. Holding each other close. I never want this moment to end. I never want to forget how this feels. He leans in and kisses me again, tender, gentle, yet strong. I return the kiss with all my soul. He's back. My Julian has returned.

Chapter 2

We're late leaving our bedroom the next morning. We awoke early, but the sight of each other's naked bodies proved too much for our self control. When we finally step out into the large living room, showered and dressed, it's to Jace's lazy applause. He's seated at the head of the dining table, several empty plates before him. Sardonic, amused, he claps, and Eric and Yuliya have trouble hiding their grins as he does.

Good morning, little love birds. How kind of you to join us.

I grin back at Yuliya. I can't even begin to pretend to play it cool. Julian isn't even ruffled. We move over to the table and take our seats.

Julian grins back at his brother. What's the matter, Jace? Weren't the girls impressed last night by your bullet hole?

Jace narrows his eyes. Girls like a guy that'll bleed for them. Not on them.

Eric laughs. One of the girls pointed out the puddle of blood under his stool. He told her he'd spilled his Bloody Mary and ordered another.

I cut in. Shouldn't you get it checked?

Jace shakes his head. Nah. I'll just keep eating plenty of beef. I'm making blood as fast as I'm losing it.

I look to Julian. He shrugs. Jace has a disturbingly high amount of experience with gunshot and stab wounds. If he's not worried, I'm not.

Well. I examine the fare laid out on the table. Croissants, pastries, plenty of coffee I've just lost my appetite.

Julian reaches out and grabs a ham and cheese croissant. Pours a large mug of coffee, and then completes his plate with a bunch of grapes. Grins at me. Eat up. We've got a big day ahead of us.

Eric's face sobers up. Are we going to start my training today?

Everybody pauses and looks to Julian. I haven't had a chance yet to ask him. I knew his plan to send Eric in as an underworld criminal to meet with Gustave Bonfils was suicidal. Would he still insist on it?

Julian shakes his head. Change of plans, Eric. You're no longer the star of the show.

Eric's relief is palpable. As is mine - I sit back in my seat. I'd done it. I'd saved his life. I take a deep breath and feel Julian take my hand.

What? Jace sounds annoyed. Why the hell not? We've already started putting the word out there.

I open my eyes to see Julian shrug amiably. Rumors like those come and go all the time. We'll stop spreading them, and nobody will care, much less notice.

But why? Jace sits forward, wincing as his leg shifts. It's a good plan, as far as it goes.

A good plan. Julian sips his coffee. But not the best. After thinking it over, I think Gustave would see through Eric too easily. No. Better if we have Eric play something a little more low key.

Low key? Eric blinks. I can tell he'd thought he was completely off the hook. Like what?

All eyes are on Julian. Has he come up with an alternative plan already? I'd spent hours yesterday furiously trying to think up an alternative, and drawn a blank.

I think you would make a fantastic bathroom attendant. We all stare blankly at him.

A bathroom attendant? Eric is completely confused.

You know? Julian smiles