Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX (1) - Is That Your Thigh I'm Squeezing?

By Gene Clements

If you’ve read any of the short stories in the Tilly and Elmer series, you may have wondered how much more adventuresome Tilly and Elmer must have been as teenagers. Now it can be revealed! In the Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX series, our favorite sexagenarians describe, in sometimes hilarious and sometimes scandalous detail, their slow motion coming of age in the Midwest in the early sixties. From their clumsy first date to the first time they go “all the way” (on the second try), you’ll gasp at Elmer’s inexperience, smile at Tilly’s (real or faked?) innocence, and perhaps shed a tear of empathy at the blundering beauty of their first time.

Book 1, Is that your Thigh I’m Squeezing?, recounts the beginning of their relationship, from Elmer’s furtive examination of Tilly’s anatomy to the miscommunication surrounding the conclusion of their first date. It must have worked out though; they are still teasing each other about the legendary events of that first date fifty years later.

September 29, 1961
The phone call:

“Hello?”
“Tilly?”
“This is Mrs. Williams. Would you like to speak with Tilly?”
“Um, yes. It’s Elmer Talbot. Is Tilly there?”
Elmer heard Tilly’s mom call out, away from the phone. “Tilly, it’s Elmer Talbot.”
While he waited, Elmer considered how a bug must feel when it’s about to be squashed. The huge foot descending, blocking out the sky, coming closer and closer ...
“Hello Elmer!”
Silence.
“Elmer?”
“Hello Tilly, it’s Elmer.”
“I know silly! How are you?”
“Want to go to the movies Saturday night?”
“You know I want to go to the movies Saturday night, Elmer. Thank you for asking!”
One second passed in silence as Elmer began to breathe again.
Another second of silence passed as a huge weight ascended from Elmer’s shoulders.
There was no sound for another second as Elmer realized he actually WAS the greatest stud west of the Mississippi.
Elmer smiled quietly as he imagined Tilly at his feet, reaching up pleadingly while clinging to his thigh. “Make love to me!” she begged. He gently removed the last of her clothing and laid her across the soft rug in front of the fire. The warm, flickering light illuminated her naked...
“Elmer?”
“Yes?” Elmer replied in a voice that sounded slightly deeper than before.
“You ARE asking me to go WITH you, aren’t you Elmer?”
“Of course. How about if I pick you up at 6:30?”
“OK, that will be fun.”
“I hope so. Bye.”
“See you then.”

• Language: English
• Publisher: Gene Clements
• Release date: Jun 13, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310728020

Gene Clements

Gene Clements is an artist, architect, and educator. He began the Tilly and Elmer series by writing a couple of paragraphs about a frisky older couple. His friends thought they were funny and wanted to find out what was going to happen if he finished the story. Now they know, for better or worse.Gene grew up in a small town in the Midwest although he now lives in California. He thinks he’s eighteen, but he’s really the same age as Tilly and Elmer. These stories aren’t necessarily autobiographical. Gene knows a lot of interesting people and has a prolific imagination; a dangerous combination.

Book preview

Is That Your Thigh I'm Squeezing?

Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX

Book 1

Gene Clements

Illustrations and Cover Design

Gene Clements

Is That Your Thigh I'm Squeezing?

Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX

Book 1

Gene Clements

This is a work of fiction. Events, places, characters or names are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events, places, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Any references to historical events, places, or real people are used fictitiously. All characters depicted in this work of fiction are 18 years of age or older.

Copyright 2014, 2015 Gene Clements

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Table of Contents

Author's Note

Is That Your Thigh I'm Squeezing?

About the Author

Other Titles in the Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX Series

Other Tilly and Elmer Titles

Author’s Note:

These fictional stories chronicle the romantic, usually erotic, and almost always humorous, adventures of Tilly and Elmer, a Midwestern couple in their late sixties. They’ve been married for close to fifty years, and would appear to the casual observer to be the definition of an old married couple. But while they ARE a couple, AND married, they don’t consider themselves OLD. In fact, they still feel like teenagers most of the time, although sometimes events remind them that they aren’t quite as athletic, skinny, or flexible, as they were five decades ago. No matter. They try to recapture their youth anyway; and when they can’t quite recapture it, they at least