Keeping Spear

By CM Martin

*** Warning: this book contains strong sexual content. Intended for mature audiences only. ***
Running away was what I always did when times got tough, but Caleb turned out to be the one problem I didn't want to run away from. I fell for him. I fell hard. The intense connection we shared that first night was only the beginning. After Ben’s attack, Caleb’s quiet reassurance gave me strength, but was our connection enough to endure the difficulties we would surely face? Was I enough to help Caleb overcome the ghosts of his past? Was he enough to help me confront my own past relationship baggage?
Picking up right where Falling Spear (Book 1) left off, Mia Alvarez finds herself in not one, but two precarious situations: overcoming Ben’s attack and facing Caleb’s past. Can she find the strength to fight for what her heart wants? Is it worth the risk to her fragile heart? Or will her own haunted past get in the way of it all?

• Language: English
• Publisher: CM Martin
• Release date: Jun 9, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310173301

Book preview

KEEPING SPEAR

Book Two of the Spear Series

By

CM Martin

Smashwords Edition

******

Published by CM Martin

on Smashwords

Copyright © 2014, CM Martin

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Melissa Gill-MGBookCovers & Designs

Cover images from depositphoto.com

This book contains content that is not suitable for readers 17 and under.

This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons-living or dead-or places, events, or locales is purely accidental. The characters are reproductions of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright Page

Table of Contents

Dedication

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Dedication

To a wonderful person who loves me unconditionally and who has stayed by my side. For being a great father and provider. I appreciate everything you do. To my first love. I love you.

Prologue

Caleb

The Funeral

I arranged for his body to be put in a casket and buried immediately. The faster this was done, the faster I could get the hell out of here. The stiff corpse in the silver coffin lies there without giving me answers. So many questions were going through my head and my father wasn’t alive to answer them for me. What the fuck were you thinking, Dad? What made you do it? The shock of what was discovered before he tipped over with a massive coronary and died was on everyone's mind. Including mine. How could the great Samuel Spear all of a sudden go crook? His signature approved his clients’ money to be invested in fake offshore accounts, losing everything. He literally threw all that money away. His best friend and business partner, Peter Hall and ten others lost hundreds of thousands! I just didn't understand! He didn't even pocket the money, just gave it away to non-existing accounts. Money gone like a fart in the wind. Fuck! How could he do this to me! What was he thinking? Fuck these tears! There was no way I was crying for the man. I had idolized my whole life.

I needed to get the hell out of here. I wouldn't be able to bury my father with all the hearsay and doubt floating around. Everyone hated him and somehow I was included in that dark cloud, my name now being drug through the mud. I just didn't understand.

Turning, I see him. Familiar dark eyes beneath salt and pepper hair. A stare causing an inner turmoil of emotions.

Caleb, he said.

Peter. What the hell was I supposed to say to him? How could you do this to me, Dad?

I know there hasn't been time for us to talk, but I am sorry for your loss. I know how much you loved each other, he nodded in sympathy. My father had taken his entire 401K and he was here giving me his condolences.

You’re here, thank you. Seriously, what else could I say? So much guilt ate at me for what happened that I just stared at the funeral home's sterile floor.

Son, I've known you since you were born and your father longer than that. I just can't believe he would do what they are accusing him of. Something is just...off. Don't you think?

I snapped my head up to look at him, my hands fisting. I haven't stepped foot in his office for months! I had no idea what he was up to or if he did indeed do it, but everything is pointing his way. None of that matters now, does it? He's lying here dead incapable of giving me answers. I just...I need to get out of here. My stood, deflated.

I understand, I do. The FBI and SEC are bringing in an auditor, things will just get messier. I will do my best to keep you out of this as much as I can. With your father gone, there's nothing they can do, so this will eventually blow over. You just need to give it time.

I won't wait around here. I'm ruined. The news and papers are killing me. I'm selling everything of his and transferring the money into an account. I want the money to be split between the eleven, including you, Peter. Any assets I acquired will also be sold, I need to get out of here and start anew. Peter, I don't know what happened and right now I don't care. I hope you understand, I walked toward the exit with my focus straight ahead. There was no looking back at my father or the friend he betrayed.

Chapter One

Mia

I'm sad and I can't remember why. My sun has been eclipsed and I can't see any light. I know I'm walking outside. The grass is wet and sticky grass under my feet and between my toes. The air smells of rain coming. I can feel my chest rising and falling in small sobs. Ahead I see a young boy huddled, with his head down, knees pulled to his chest. I notice he is also crying. I walk tentatively toward him with the intent to sooth his pain. As I reach him, his cries grow louder. He’s mumbling, You said you would never leave. I want to keep you. You said! You said! You said I could keep you. I love you. Please let me keep you. Stay with me. I cautiously place a gentle hand on his shoulder. His dark haired head lifts along with his innocent deep blue eyes. I recognize his eyes and the dimples on his cheeks. I am looking at a small defenseless younger Caleb. But why are we crying? Who is he talking about?

He quickly stands, moving his tiny hands to brush dirt off his shirt and jeans. He wipes his tears and lunges at me, wrapping me in a tight hug. I hold him with all my strength and begin to wail with him. Crying for him, for me, for our pain that I don't understand yet. Why is my Caleb so sad? I would never leave him. I hold him harder to me, promising I will never leave him. I keep sobbing because he is repeating the same words over and over in vain. Suddenly he says, with a much deeper voice, Mia, wake up. Wake up Mia.

My head was pounding painfully between my temples. It radiated all around my body as I shifted awake. God, it hurt to open my eyes. Slowly I felt him wrap his arms around me.

Mia, shhh, sweetheart. It was just a bad dream. A sad dream, I wanted to say but instead accepted his welcoming warmth. My legs and arms were tangled along with his and my hair was moist from sweat. In a rush, memories of what happened to me last night pour into my mind. Ben on top of me. Ben's smell of strong whisky above me. I remembered everything. Chills ran through my body. That was the reason I was so sad. It was very early morning, some light hinting at daybreak and I was lying next to Caleb at his place. The bed felt foreign under me, but the arms that held me didn’t. His scent was familiar and it comforted me. He pulled me to face him and began wiping tears I didn't know I had off my face. The Caleb I fell in love with after a one-night stand. For weeks, Ben had tried to woo me and I almost fell for his sweet, charming attempt. He was the perfect gentleman. He was the definition of a man I could take home to meet my mom. My friends all tried to convince me to give him a chance, but I was hesitant. Something pulled me away. Who would have known he would do this to me? Thank God I didn't give in to Ben and his bullshit. My night with a blue-eyed stranger changed my course completely.

What was supposed to be a one-night stand turned into a semi-stalker. He was determined to make me his girlfriend. I foolishly gave into his advances before I had the opportunity to get to know him. When I met with Ben to tell him I could only offer him my friendship, he flipped out.

Sweetheart, you’re safe here. Caleb’s voice shook my insides, pulling me from my thoughts. I felt so safe with him.

I know I am. I...I was sad, not scared. I said, my throat burning and dry. He seemed to be mulling over my answer in his mind.

Try to get some rest. I did what I was told, closed my eyes and drifted away.

My eyes felt like they were on fire as sunlight blanketed the room, and it took me a second to remember where I was. I fought off the ugly thoughts creeping in on me and took a deep breath in an attempt to prepare myself for what was ahead of me. I exhaled deeply, releasing my fears and stress. Ben didn't break me last night. I was stronger than that but I needed to be even stronger today. If it were not for Caleb making it in time to save me last night, God knows what Ben would have done.

My muscles were tense so I carefully moved my awaking body. My back felt hot from being against something warm and solid. I felt something poking at my backside, nudging me and…growing. Caleb's warmth was behind me, intoxicating me with his scent. And he was aroused. I didn't know whether to laugh, cringe or just go with it. I couldn’t relish in him. I was worried this could be our last time together. My body was betraying me as I arched my back. I was desperately responding to his breath hitting the back of my neck. I imagined his wide chest pressed to my back and thought about how quickly he was able to help me relax last night and this morning. I took a minute to memorize the moment, to keep and take with me before I climbed out of bed.

When you see yourself in front of a mirror, aside from your reflection, what else do you see? It has been known that when one looks at themselves in the mirror they see a distorted image of themselves instead of what is really there. It is the mind playing tricks. It can not see something that is actually there or see something that isn’t there at all. I was in the latter category.

I stood in front of Caleb's bathroom mirror, and looking back at me were eyes that were red, swollen and puffy. My cheeks were pale. My hair was matted and tangled. My eyes slowly took in each detail. They moved from one small detail to the next. My eyes were seeing what was in front of me but my mind couldn’t catch up to them. I stood rooted, taking in the damage without being able to react to it. I am not going to break. I am not going to break.

I looked down where my wrists were red and still pulsing. I lifted my tank top, revealing ugly bruises around one breast. I took in the marks and my rumpled shirt. These marks weren’t made with love or in the heat of the moment, but by force. I was almost taken by force. By a guy I thought was a friend. My fingers gently roamed the bruises but I felt nothing. I was numb.

My mind was so lost by the disturbed sight of my abused body that I didn’t hear the bathroom door open.

Fuck, sweetheart. I am so sorry he did this to you. His voice echoed around me. I quickly covered myself. He sounded sincere and it made me feel vulnerable. He stood a foot away from me grimacing at my pain. Last night I was in shock. I couldn’t process it all. I needed to cry. I needed a release. I didn’t have my mom to hold me and cry with me. I couldn’t tell my brother or he would go after Ben. I didn’t want him to go to jail for assaulting, or worse, killing Ben. Caleb was there to hold me and take me away.

I don't remember much after the incident, only pieces of when we arrived here at his apartment. A small sob trying to break free. Him holding me as I closed my eyes, tears falling like the rain, Please Caleb, don’t leave me tonight. Hold me. I cried.

Oh baby, I’m not leaving you, he exhaled. My thoughts ran a mile a minute. I felt dizzy and knew I was going to break down any second. I held on to his blood-splattered shirt for dear life. I let it all go.

When he laid me on his bed, I remember shaking my head from side to side as I fought off the image of Ben on top of me. The nasty smell of whiskey on his breath. His hands roughly touching me. I let it all play out in my head. I wanted to replay it so I could get it out of my system, out of my mind. It would be the only time I allowed myself to think of that moment. Ben wasn’t worth more than a moment. Caleb held me in his arms like a father held a newborn, like I was fragile. Then he watched me break down. Caleb spoke softly to me, telling me I was safe and that he wasn’t going to let anything or anyone hurt me. Hearing those words on repeat last night helped. Falling into a deep slumber, my dreams took me to safe, warm arms and that little boy who was so sad. Strong arms wrapped around me like a warm coat, sheltering me from the ugly, from the evil.

His light touch on my shoulder broke my thoughts.

I need to shower, my throat was still dry and raspy and my words barely audible. I turned and looked up at his blue eyes and rumpled hair. The sight of him made me want to smile. I almost did.

Let me, he said, running his hand down my arm and pulling me toward the shower. He opened the glass door and turned on the water. He waited a minute to get the temperature to his satisfaction. His body was covered with a white undershirt and black boxers. I looked down and began undressing myself, needing to rid myself of all that happened yesterday. He stilled my actions and began to slowly run the hem of my shirt up, then off. He kneeled down and pulled my filthy green shorts off me. His eyes were staring at me with concern and, I admit, some heat as well. I wasn't ashamed of being naked in front of him, even after what happened, I knew he would never do anything to physically hurt me.

He quickly rid himself of his clothes and walked me into the shower. The hot water drummed all over my body, numbing every sore muscle that was straining. It stung at first, but I quickly rolled my neck and relaxed under the spray. I closed my eyes, releasing a moan, partly relief and partly stimulation. I first heard then felt Caleb's hands lathering soap before roaming it over my body. I was expecting some sort of stiffness or fear from his touch, but his touch had the opposite effect on my body. I moved toward him, arching my back.

His hands began to lather up my hair and my body leaned on his chest as he did. The water cascaded over us, running down the drain along with all that happened yesterday. I was slowly gaining strength with each caress he gave and every part of my body bowed to him.

I feel a lot better. Thank you, my voice sounding a bit stronger. When I opened my eyes he tilted my chin up to look at him. Jesus, he was so tall. His wide shoulders encompassed my entire figure. My insides warmed seeing all of him. I had to take a small step back to see how the water ran down his perfect body. The body that dominated mine just a day ago. Caleb's chiseled chest and stomach rose and fell under my gaze. My mouth parted as my eyes roamed down his body, settling on his now growing erection.

By the looks you're giving me, I believe you. The corners of his mouth curved up. I stepped into his arms, standing on tiptoes to wrap my arms around his neck. I could feel a small smile breaking through the emotional walls we built over night.

After he turned the water off, he dried my body by running a towel again all over me, taking his time with my hair. My body was tuning him in, becoming sensitive to every look and touch. A part of me was waiting for him to touch me there. His touch felt restrained, verging on a sexual caress.

Do you have any idea how you make me feel? I wish that for one minute you would know how much you have come to mean to me, his voice broke the silence we held. I want to say things to you, but I don't know where your mindset is right now. I have things...to say. I need you to listen.

I held a finger to his mouth to quiet him as I buttoned a blue shirt he had out for me. Later. First, I need to call into work and make some excuse for being absent today. With that I walked out of his restroom and into his bedroom. The sunlight glowed invitingly into the bedroom.

I already took care of it. You don't have to go to work today or for the rest of the week.

How did you manage that? I replied back then stopped, seeing him half-naked with only a towel around his narrow hips, his wet hair messy on the top.