Awakening Mercy

By Angela Benson

Will the past ruin their future together?

CeCe Williams and Nate Richardson were not looking to fall in love. After being deserted by her son's father, CeCe was content making a life for herself and her four-year-old son. Nate, recovering from a recent divorce, devoted his energies to his job as director of Genesis House, a social services center in inner city Atlanta. Neither is prepared for what grows between them when CeCe comes to work at Genesis House. Can they let go of the pain of the past and build a life together or will secrets from CeCe's past destroy any hope they have for a future?

If you want an emotional and uplifting read, CeCe and Nate's story is for you. Order your copy of Awakening Mercy today!

The GENESIS HOUSE Series

Awakening Mercy, Book 1
Abiding Hope, Book 2
Enduring Love, Book 3 (coming in 2012)

REVIEWS

"[Angela Benson] has not created plaster saints, but real men and women who grapple with real-life issues." -The Romance Reader

"Ms. Benson, with AWAKENING MERCY, reinforces her place as one of the most talented writers of romance fiction in whichever genre she writes. This book, her first inspirational, confirms that she writes with emotion, only now her message is strengthened by her strong faith in God." -Romance in Color

"Ms. Benson paints a fine picture of the trials of a couple who must rely on their faith to make a go of a relationship in this 4-1/2 star read. She is just as compelling a writer in Christian romance as she is in contemporary." -Affaire de Coeur

"This novel by Benson, a first-time Christian-market author, pricks the conscience and stirs the soul while entertaining. Recommend to romantic fiction readers and to high school students, as it illustrates that actions have consequences." -CBA Marketplace

• Language: English
• Publisher: Angela Benson
• Release date: Nov 10, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465888693

Angela Benson

Angela Benson is a graduate of Spelman College and the author of fourteen novels, including the Christy Award–nominated Awakening Mercy, the Essence bestseller The Amen Sisters, Up Pops the Devil, and Sins of the Father. She is an associate professor at the University of Alabama and lives in Tuscaloosa, Alabama.

Book preview

About the Author

Angela Benson is the award winning and bestselling author of fourteen novels, two novellas and a non-fiction writing book.  Her most recent print work is Delilah’s Daughters (Avon, 2014).  Her next print book, The Summer of Me, will be released by Avon in early 2015.  While you’re waiting for Angela’s new title, be sure to check out her backlist recently released in eBook format.  Join Angela on the web at http://www.facebook.com/AngelaBensonBooks or http://www.AngelaBenson.com.

Author Booklist

Genesis House Inspirational Romance & Family Drama Series

Awakening Mercy, Book 1, Genesis House Series

http://www.angelabenson.com/awakeningmercy.html

"Ms. Benson paints a fine picture of the trials of a couple who must rely on their faith to make a go of a relationship in this 4-1/2 star read.  She is just as compelling a writer in Christian romance as she is in contemporary." —Affaire de Coeur Magazine

Abiding Hope, Book 2, Genesis House Series

http://www.angelabenson.com/abidinghope.html

Christy Award nominee, Benson, continues the momentum she established in Awakening Mercy as she explores the lives of Shay and Marvin Taylor, the founders of Genesis House. . . Benson is a leading author of African American romances and Christian fiction, and her insight into God’s impact on our lives make her work a requirement for growing collections. —The Library Journal

The Amen Sisters, Book 3, Genesis House Series

http://www.angelabenson.com/theamensisters.html

Christy Award nominee, Benson, continues the momentum she established in Awakening Mercy as she explores the lives of Shay and Marvin Taylor, the founders of Genesis House. . . Benson is a leading author of African American romances and Christian fiction, and her insight into God’s impact on our lives make her work a requirement for growing collections. —The Library Journal

Enduring Love, Book 4 (coming November 2014)

http://www.angelabenson.com/enduringlove.html

Book 4 in the Genesis House series features the long-awaited romance of Daniel and Vickie, who were first introduced in Abiding Hope (Book 2)

Single Title Inspirational Family Drama

The Summer of Me (coming January 2015)

http://www.angelabenson.com/summerofme.html

The nationally bestselling author of Delilah’s Daughters and The Amen Sisters returns with a moving story about a single mother who discovers the woman she can be in one unforgettable summer.

Delilah’s Daughters

http://www.angelabenson.com/delilahsdaughters.html

...instead of Samson’s secret, it’s Delilah’s that threatens to destroy the spiritual foundation she and her late husband, Rocky, build for their three daughters...Delilah’s Daughters is a captivating story from the beginning to the breathtaking end. 4.5 stars (out of 5 ) — Romantic Times Magazine

Sins of the Father

http://www.angelabenson.com/sinsofthefather.html

"Sins of the Father is a powerful story of revenge, betrayal, and forgiveness. Benson uses three-dimensional characters to prove that regret, shame and hatred can give way to acceptance, forgiveness and love. The storyline will surprise you while the outcome will increase your faith in God. If you love reading about real life issues, this is a book that will keep you glued to the pages." –Real Page Turners

Up Pops the Devil

http://www.angelabenson.com/uppopsthedevil.html

Angela Benson writes a commanding and enthralling story on the power of salvation and how temptation works to unravel it. . .Benson’s writing is fluid and demonstrates her ability to incorporate biblical principle in everyday living. – RAWSISTAZ Reviews

Showers of Blessings, a novella in A Million Blessings

http://www.angelabenson.com/amillionblessings.html

Assistant pastor Ronnie has a shameful secret: he's a compulsive gambler. And just when it seems he's run out of luck, he finds salvation in a miraculous win. But nothing can keep Ronnie from recklessly betting his family's future. His only way out is through renewed faith–and a desperate act of redemption.

Nonfiction

Telling Your Tale: The Beginner’s Guide to Writing Fiction for Print and eBook

Telling Your Tale Workbook: The Beginner’s Guide to Writing Fiction for Print and eBook

http://www.angelabenson.com/tellingyourtale.html

[Benson’s] writing advice is constructive and sincere; writers would be well-advised to follow her advice and practice their craft by completing the exercises in the book. —WritersWrite.com on Telling The Tale (first edition)

Sweet Passion Contemporary Romance Series

Friend and Lover

http://www.angelabenson.com/friendandlover.html

". . . a sham engagement between two longtime attorney friends leads to the real thing just in time for New Year’s Eve in Angela D. Benson’s funny and engaging ‘Friend and Lover’." —Library Journal

The Nicest Guy in America

http://www.angelabenson.com/thenicestguyinamerica.html

Angela Benson, a veteran romance writer, has earned her stars and bars with this sensational, subtle and sensual battle of the sexes. —Romantic Times Magazine Top Pick!  4.5/5 stars

The Way Home

http://www.angelabenson.com/thewayhome.html

. . . with THE WAY HOME, [Angela Benson] emerges as a writer of great depth, sensitivity, and unparalleled talent. —Romantic Times Magazine Top Pick!  4.5/5 stars

Bands of Gold (coming August 2014)

http://www.angelabenson.com/bandsofgold.html

Christina’s ambition has taken her to the top of her profession, but new employee Jackson makes her wonder if she’s sacrificed too much for her success.

For All Time (coming September 2014)

http://www.angelabenson.com/foralltime.html

FOR ALL TIME will touch every woman's heart with its pathos and passion as Ms. Benson takes a heartrending look at the stark realities of marriage after the honeymoon is over. – 4 stars –Romantic Times Magazine

Between the Lines (coming October 2014)

http://www.angelabenson.com/betweenthelines.html

BETWEEN THE LINES is author Angela Benson's latest romantic confection, with the heady flavor of an Amaretto Liqueur and the rich sensuality of smooth, sweet cream! – 4 stars –Romantic Times Magazine

Dedication

I'm always grateful to God for the people he places in our lives just at the time that we need them. One such person for me has been my personal Gertrude Brinson. Though she's not the character in the book, the character's care for CeCe is very similar to the care my Mrs. Brinson has shown to me. Over the last twenty-plus years, she's prayed for me and with me, when we were together and when we were apart. She prayed for me and loved me during a time when I couldn't pray for myself and when I found it difficult to believe that God still loved me. This book is for her.

Prologue

Alabama, Five Years Ago

CeCe stood alone on the back porch of the house where she'd grown up. The late November evening was cool, and she rubbed her hands up and down her arms to ward off the chill she felt. It's all going to work out, she murmured to herself. He'll come around. He loves me, after all. I know he does.

CeCe?

She turned around at the sound of the masculine voice she'd come to love. A voice whose very timbre caressed her skin like a kiss. It had been a long time since she'd felt the loving caress of his voice. Their last meeting had been anything but loving. He'd told her that he was still in love with his old girlfriend and planned to marry her, and she'd told him that their past relationship was soon to bear fruit. Eric?

It's me, he said, coming around the house and up the steps. She moved back and sat on their old green glider, hoping he would join her as he often had in the past. He chose, instead, to remain standing. Have you thought about what we talked about last time? he asked.

The strident tone of his voice made her skin crawl. Why was he so distant? Why didn't he hold her? He used to hold her. Why didn't he hold her now, when she so needed to be held? She turned away from him and focused her attention on the bare muscadine vine. Her fondest childhood memories were of sneaking out with her father on warm August nights to pick the first berries of the season. Those had been such good, happy times. Not like tonight. She rubbed her hands on her arms again. I should have worn a sweater, she thought. Instead, she had chosen a light sheath that had been one of Eric's favorites. But what had been the point? He no longer loved her, and he couldn't care less what she wore or how she looked.

CeCe, came the strident tone again.

I can't do it, Eric. I won't do it.

He grabbed her by her shoulders and turned her around to face him. The emptiness she saw in his brown eyes confirmed that he had no feelings left for her. There was no trace of love in the dark eyes now condemning her. She wondered if there ever had been. We have to be mature about this, CeCe. His voice calmed. Look, we have our whole lives ahead of us. What about your plans to go to law school?

She pulled herself away from him. "You mean your plans to get married, don't you?" She and Eric had spent many nights together talking about their future. He'd go to med school at Howard, and she'd join him there for law school next year. When she graduated, they'd get married. But that was before. She knew he and Yolanda were planning to get married at Christmas. Apparently they were so in love they couldn't wait until they graduated.

I'm doing the best I can here, CeCe. He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his light wool pants and rocked back on the heels of his loafers. I don't know what you want from me.

I want you to love me the way you said you did, she thought, but she couldn't bring herself to say the words aloud. She'd given up everything she believed in because of some girlish notion that she and Eric were soul mates, but she wouldn't give up the last vestiges of her pride. Does Yolanda know?

He flinched and she was glad. Bull's-eye!

This doesn't concern her.

CeCe had known he wouldn't tell Yolanda. She didn't think Miss Perfect Yolanda would go for marrying a guy who had gotten some other girl pregnant. Maybe Yolanda needs to make that decision.

This is between you and me, CeCe. Yolanda's not a part of it.

CeCe heard the fear in his voice, and the sound made her feel more in control of her life than she'd felt since learning she was pregnant. She shook her head and dropped her hands to her side. She was no longer cold. She hadn't wanted it to come to this, but what choice did she have? She was twenty-one years old, pregnant, and a senior in college. What real choice did she have? I'd say it's between you, me, Yolanda, and our baby.

His eyes flashed anger, and he moved closer to her. Leave Yolanda out of this.

CeCe wondered if he wanted to hurt her as much as she wanted to hurt him. She would have laughed if her tears weren't so close to the surface. Didn't he know there was no way he could hurt her more than he already had?

Did you hear me, CeCe? I said to leave Yolanda out of this.

CeCe looked at him—really looked at him. How she'd loved this man! The dreams she'd had of life with him still burned in her heart, and she guessed the baby inside her guaranteed that the embers would always flicker. But she had more than her feelings for him—or his lack of feelings for her—to consider. She had to think about her unborn child. Placing her hands across her stomach in a protective gesture, she told Eric exactly how things were going to be. I'm going to have this baby, Eric, whether you want me to or not. If my telling Yolanda is the only way to make you accept your responsibilities, then so be it. I'll do whatever it takes to protect my—no, our child.

Chapter 1

Atlanta; The Present

Cecelia CeCe Williams clicked her left mouse button with fervor. She still couldn't believe she had to do one hundred and fifty hours of community service. One hundred and fifty hours! That crazy judge. Why hadn't he just let her pay the fine and be done with it? After all, it was only a few measly parking tickets.

As she finished running the numbers for her client's monthly audit report, CeCe considered how she could repay the esteemed judge for his Solomon-esque wisdom. She ought to send a letter to the mayor. And the governor. Murderers and drug dealers were getting off scot-free. Embezzlers and swindlers did no time. And here she was, getting one hundred and fifty hours of community service for a few measly parking tickets!

How many parking tickets, CeCe? came the voice of conscience she sometimes wished she could silence.

OK, OK, she muttered aloud. Maybe it was more than a few.

Talking to yourself, CeCe? Now I don't know why you're doing that, when the two of us could be lunching in a quiet booth someplace making plans for our next date.

CeCe didn't have to turn around to know the words came from Larry Meadows, God's gift to women—or so he thought. I'm busy, Larry, she said, her eyes fixed on her computer monitor. The Excel spreadsheet displayed before her held more interest than her unexpected and uninvited guest.

But you've got to have lunch sometime, Larry said in the exaggerated drawl that he turned on and off at will. How about having it with me today? We can go to the Ritz.

CeCe turned to look at the tall, lean, brown-skinned guy standing in the doorway of the cubicle that was her home for at least eight hours of each day. He was handsome, she had to admit. Most of the women in the office considered his aristocratic profile and boyish charm a lethal combination. Too bad they only served to remind her of someone she'd much rather forget. That's not a good idea, Larry.

Larry looked over his shoulder as if to see whether anyone else was around. He turned back to her. Look, CeCe, he said, his voice tight and minus the drawl now, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his tan slacks. I've apologized a thousand times for that first date. I just got carried away. I promise you I'm not that kind of guy. I really would like to take you out again.

CeCe actually believed he was sincere. I'm sorry, Larry, but I don't think so.

Why not? Do you think you're too good for me?

CeCe shook her head. A child in a man's body. She bet David, her four-year-old son, was more mature than this thirty-something man. I don't want to go out with you again. Can't we just leave it at that?

Look, I'm not used to begging women to go out with me. I just thought I'd give you a second chance to see what you were missing. I guess you've lost out, though, because I'm not giving you any more chances.

CeCe stared after him as he stalked away. A few years ago, if someone had told her that most men were variations of Eric, she wouldn't have believed them. But she knew the truth now from experience. She seemed to attract two types of men: those who wanted nothing to do with a woman with a child, and those who expected a single mother to be sexually available. The first kind she understood, so she always made it clear up front that she had a son.

The second kind were still a mystery to her. They came in all shapes and sizes, and they had assorted modes of operation. Some, like Larry, went at you on the first date, assuming you were open for anything. Others were more subtle. They were willing to cultivate the relationship a little, but with the expectation that once it was established, sex would become a regular part of it. Even Christian, or so-called Christian, men seemed to have this expectation. She'd quickly grown tired of it and made her celibacy part of the initial conversations. Better they knew that up front, too.

Enough, she chided herself. She didn't need to think about men today. No, she'd made a pact with herself, and she refused to allow men to worry her. She'd been in love once, and once was definitely enough to last a lifetime. Besides, she had more important things on her mind. Like a four-year-old son who was more a little man than a little boy. Like a full-time accounting job that paid part-time wages. Like a part-time job selling real estate that seemed to need full-time hours to be profitable. Like an overzealous judge and a hundred and fifty hours of community service time.

She glanced up at the Mickey Mouse clock on the wall of her cubicle. As always, looking at David's contribution to making her office feel more homey caused a warmth to settle around her heart. She could still remember him standing on her upholstered guest chair, trying valiantly to help her position his gift in just the right spot.

This time, though, she couldn't luxuriate in the good feelings the memory evoked. It was quarter to twelve, and she knew she was going to be late for her noon community service appointment at Genesis House. The drive from her Buckhead office to Genesis House's downtown location would take a minimum of twenty minutes, and finding a legal parking space nearby would take an additional fifteen, if she was lucky. She took a bit of pleasure at the thought of Nathaniel Richardson waiting for her this time, though. It would serve him right for standing her up on Saturday after she'd canceled two promising appointments to show houses. Selling even one of those properties would have put her three thousand dollars closer to paying off the debts that hung over her head like a dark cloud threatening to break into a ferocious thunderstorm at any moment. If she missed another appointment because of Nathaniel Richardson's inability to keep to his schedule, the two of them were going to have serious problems working together.

CeCe, do you want to go to lunch? We're going to Mick's.

Pushing thoughts of her debts to the back of her mind for the time being, CeCe looked around and saw two members of her work group, Debra and Cathy, standing at the entrance to her cube. Not today, she told them. I've got an appointment, but I'll walk out with you. CeCe grabbed her purse and followed her co-workers out of the building.

Twenty-five minutes later, after circling a two-block radius surrounding Genesis House four times, praying all the while for a surface parking space to open, CeCe pulled her blue, four-year-old-but-new-to-her Maxima into the first open space in a parking deck about four blocks away. If Nathaniel Richardson missed this meeting, she decided as she got out of her car, she'd have to go back to Judge Solomon and see what kind of sentence his wisdom would mete out for the guilty Mr. Richardson.

* * *

Thirty-three-year-old Nathaniel Nate Richardson stood in front of the paint-splattered windows of his Genesis House office and looked out on downtown Atlanta without really seeing it. He thought about Cecelia Williams, or more specifically, he thought about the Saturday appointment with her that he'd had to cancel. In his eighteen months as director of Genesis House, Saturday had been the first time he'd allowed his personal problems to interfere with his work. And he didn't like it. He didn't like it one bit. He was a man who believed in commitments, and he prided himself on keeping the ones he made.

A humorless chuckle escaped his lips. Here he was, bemoaning a missed interview with a community service volunteer, when his real concern was for another broken commitment. Not that he'd wanted to break that one. No, that choice had been Naomi's, but he'd participated in it just the same.

He thought it ironic that his only appointment this past Saturday had been at three o'clock, the same time as Naomi's wedding. Had it been divine Providence? Had God given him the appointment with Ms. Williams to help keep his mind off the wedding? Well, if he had, then Nate had certainly messed up that plan. The appointment served as a minor distraction, at best. He had thought of nothing but Naomi's wedding—not the one on Saturday, but the one five and a half years ago when she'd married him. The thoughts had become so oppressive that he had started to feel as though the office walls were closing in on him. He'd had no choice but to cancel the meeting with Cecelia so he could get out of here.

He and Naomi had been married only eighteen months when she told him she was leaving him. Not leaving him to return to her family and her home in Richmond, but leaving him to start a new life in Atlanta. Shocked didn't adequately capture his surprise at hearing her words. He'd been happy and had thought she was, too. Evidently she hadn't been, because she'd packed up and moved just as she'd said she would do. Knowing they had no chance for a reconciliation if they lived in separate cities—especially since her city of choice was the home of the guy she was engaged to before she met him—Nate sold his budding Chicago law practice and the home they'd shared and followed her here to Atlanta.

In the four years since his arrival, he'd done nothing but pursue the reconciliation that he believed God wanted for them. Even when Naomi immediately started seeing her ex-fiancé, he didn't lose hope that reconciliation would someday happen for them. He'd talked to Naomi until he'd run out of words. He'd prayed until his prayers became a soulful hum from his heart to God's ears. But by the end of their first year of separation, she'd divorced him anyway.

He still hadn't allowed himself to give up, though. Whatever he and Naomi had lost, he believed God would restore. But his hope had died on Saturday. On Saturday his marriage had finally and irrevocably ended. Naomi had become another man's wife.

The sound of the buzzer on the front door of the outer office alerted Nate to what he suspected was the arrival of Cecelia Williams. He turned away from the windows and went back to his desk, gathering the papers he would need for their meeting. As his family, his friends, his pastor—everybody, it seemed—had told him, he'd done all he could do. It was now time to put off his sackcloth and ashes and get on with the life that lay before him. He was blessed with a job that made a difference in people's lives, a loving and supportive church family, and parents and sisters who loved him enough to refrain from saying, I told you so. He hadn't been able to make right the mistakes of his past—his marriage to Naomi was forever in the failure column of his life—but he could do as his loved ones counseled and accept the forgiveness that God offered him and move forward. Comforted by their advice and now believing he could heed it, he took a deep breath, said a silent prayer, and pulled open the door to the outer office.

Cecelia Williams? he called to the conservatively dressed, statuesque woman whose back was to him.

* * *

CeCe turned her attention from the announcement-covered bulletin board that dominated the wall of the outer office and looked up into the clear, brown eyes of the man whose face she'd just seen on one of the flyers tacked on the board, the man who was the director of Genesis House, the man who'd cost her three thousand dollars in lost real estate commissions. She knew it was the same man, even though in the picture he sported a full head of closely cropped hair and now he was as bald as Michael Jordan. It was his eyes. There were an honesty and an innocence in those eyes that attracted her and made her feel safe, while at the same time stirring up a primal need for self-protection. It wasn't a physical need for self-protection, though given his size—broad shoulders, muscular, and about six inches taller than her five-foot-seven-inch frame—such a reaction would not have been surprising. No, it was more a need to protect her emotions, maybe even her heart, which made no sense at all. She pushed those thoughts aside and tried to conjure up the anger she'd felt in response to what she considered his unprofessional behavior on Saturday. That effort failed miserably when his face broke into the biggest, stupidest, kindest smile she'd seen on an adult face in a long time.

He extended his hand. I'm Nate Richardson, and I want to apologize for missing our meeting on Saturday. Personal problem. I hope I didn't inconvenience you too much.

No, CeCe said, shaking his offered hand. Everything worked out. And call me CeCe; everyone does. Way to go, CeCe, she chided herself. You really told him off. She'd wanted to tell him off, but that stupid smile of his reminded her of the one David sometimes wore when he was sitting in the middle of the floor playing with one of his toys—an open, honest smile that came out of a contented and happy heart. How could she stay angry with anybody—man, woman, or child—who wore a smile like that?

Well, I'm still sorry, CeCe, he said again, placing the file of papers in his hands on the faded green receptionist's desk that looked as though it had seen better days. In fact, all the furniture in the room did. Surprisingly, the eclectic mix of worn furnishings gave the office a lived-in feeling that was both comfortable and full of vitality. I want you to know right now, he continued, that we'll count Saturday as a full eight hours worked. It's not your fault I had to leave before you got here. Sound fair?

CeCe smiled, mentally deducting the eight hours from her required hundred and fifty. More than fair.

Good. Now, have you eaten lunch?

She waved her hand, dismissing his question. I really wanted to meet with you so I skipped lunch today.

Well, we can't have that. What say I buy you lunch? I think I owe you one anyway.

But you don't have to—

He cut her off with a disarming half grin. "I know I don't have to. I want to. If I don't eat lunch, I get grouchy, and believe me, you don't want to see me

Reviews for Awakening Mercy

[pinkcrayon99 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Forty plus unpaid traffic tickets and a sentence of one hundred fifty hours of community service set Cecelia "CeCe" Williams life on an unexpected path. CeCe's community service would be served out at, Genesis House, a Christian-based organization serving the poor and underserved areas of Atlanta. Upon CeCe's initial meeting with the organization's director, Nate Richardson, she felt an instant connection but made sure to hide her feelings and guard her heart.CeCe Williams is haunted by the heartache of a past relationship that produced her four year old son, David. Eric, David's father, had been CeCe's secret crush throughout grade school and high school. Eric never showed much interest in CeCe until he was heart broken by his current girlfriend. During their brief courtship CeCe found out she was pregnant. Eric abandoned her and married the woman who had previously broke his heart. Shame overwhelmed CeCe when she returned to college at Spelman. She was nurtured by her dorm director, Miss Gertrude "B.B." Brinson. Miss Brinson later purchased a home with CeCe helping her start her new life with David. The untold secrets and shame of CeCe's past put fetters on her heart and distance between her and her family.As CeCe worked toward her community service hours at Genesis House, she formed new friendships and a closer relationship with Nate. Nate was also haunted by a past relationship. Nate's wife walked out on him after only 18months of marriage. Through prayer, communication, and much understanding Nate and CeCe progressed into the next phase of their relationship. When issues from CeCe's past suddenly arose, her heart was revealed to Nate. They both knew their relationship could not progress until CeCe confronted her past.The personal and family issues addressed in Awakening Mercy were very complex but the author did not rush the solutions. One of the things I liked the most about Awakening Mercy was the fact that Benson did not give us the cliche "church mess" type Christian fiction. The spiritual component to this novel came across as very genuine and sincere.