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    Without Tammy

    Jan 26, 2023 6 minutes

    I was scrolling through Instagram when I saw it. A picture of my friends Brian and Allison. On Allison’s left hand gleamed a diamond engagement ring. A quote from the prophet Jeremiah about “plans to give you hope and a future” completed the message. Brian and Allison were getting married.

    I felt heartsick. The post was from my friend Brian Sanchez. For 20 years, Brian had been married to my best friend, Tammy. When Tammy died of breast cancer, part of me died too. I was still grieving three and a half years later. How could Brian be moving on?

    Tammy was more than a best friend. I’d trusted her with all my secrets. We’d raised our kids and prayed together. Planned to grow old together.

    Brian was a great guy. I knew I should be happy for him. He and Allison had been dating for a year. She was lovely. He needed to move on.

    But so soon?

    I hadn’t moved on. Why should I? Tammy and Brian had

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