Evil Deeds of the Subconscious Mind

By Annette Lawrence

The story continues for three lifelong friends. Ruth has to deal with Alice, who is in the early stages of Alzheimer's disease, and Mandy, whose mother has MS, battles with the prejudices that people have against the disabled. But taking centre stage, even though she has no idea, is Rachel, who is haunted by her childhood memories. In the evening, after the 10 o'clock news, she begins her nightly ritual. But much more sinister events are about to eclipse the everyday trials and tribulations of these friends... life throws a spanner into the works.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Raider Publishing International
• Release date: Aug 16, 2011
• ISBN: 9781466090804

Book preview

Evil Deeds of the Subconscious Mind

By Annette Lawerence

Published by Raider Publishing International at Smash Words

Copyright 2011 by Annette Lawrence

SMASHWORDS EDITION

For my Mum and Dad, two bright guiding lights in my life that are no longer with me— I love and miss you both.

xxx

Acknowledgements

Wow! I get to do this again. how lucky am I?

Once more I have so many people to thank and acknowledge for being in my life. You should always be grateful for everyone that’s in you’re life, no matter how small a part they play in it or for how long they are there. This time there are many real names and places— names of people who are either themselves or whose real names have been used for characters that they’ve chosen.

Jan de Vries is very real and one of life’s good guys, one to be trusted with your life. John Mallinder is a patient of Jan’s who has M.S. and now walks… I’ve met him.

I would like to thank Phoenix House, where my mum Christine lives. She has Alzheimer’s. Her family and I will never ever be able to thank all of the staff there enough for taking care of her and loving her, as they do with all of their residents. ‘Thank you’ does not even begin to cover the eternal gratitude I have for them; this includes everyone down to the hairdresser. I have mentioned a few by name: Karen Wadman, Mavis Pike, Bev and Charley Kelly, and the cleaner Caroline. I have also mentioned Karen’s husband Ian, along with their friends Sandra and Steve.

I would also like to mention Chester Shopmobility, where my good friends Sue and Mike are along with two more of my friends, Joe and Susan. I have deep respect for all Big Issue vendors. To hit rock bottom and somehow find the guts to fight you’re way back into society… I take my hat of to them. So, whenever you think you’re having a bad day, think of them. Manny sells the Big Issue, and he always has a big smile for all of his customers. He adores his two daughters Angela and Fifi J.

The Helen Ley Care Centre in Leamington Spa also deserves mention for giving both people with M.S. and their caretakers a well-deserved respite.

I would like to thank Sam, a.k.a. ‘Lady Sam Sings’, who is my niece, and her two sons Kaylith and Sirus… Check her out on the web. Thank you also to Val, my sister, who wanted to be a character that swims with wild dolphins for a living, and to her partner of twenty years, Martyn, who wanted to be a tour guide on Loch Ness. I would also like to mention Maureen, a.k.a. ‘Mo’, my friend of many years, and Fiona, who gave me one of the biggest character challenges in the book: that of Gert. I ended up thoroughly enjoying writing about Gert, and the months of research that I did to build her character up. A big ‘thank you’ for that one, Fiona. Talking of research… it has been so rewarding delving deep into subjects of which I would have normally just scratch the surface.

A huge thank you goes out to one of my oldest and best friends, Andy Murdoch. I hadn’t thought about having my photograph on the back of this book, but when I saw the photograph that he took of me at my fiftieth birthday party, I knew that I wanted to use it.

I would also like to mention Kahlil Gibran, born in Bsharri, Lebanon in 1883, who was a poet and whose poetry has inspired me. I have used yet another one of his verses in this story.

I also need to acknowledge certain books that I’ve mentioned: Black Patent Shoes: Dancing with M.S. by Eva Marsh, Curing the Incurable by Jacque C. Rigg, Natural Cures They Don’t Want You to Know About by Kevin Trudeau, and Good Hotel Guide.

This is a very strange acknowledgement, but one that is very dear to my heart: In Chapter Three, I write about a green silk dress with shoestring straps. This dress exists, and it was the dress that my mother made over several months. If I shut my eyes, I can still see her clearing the table after Sunday lunch and then setting up her sewing machine to make this dress. She was so proud when she finished. My niece Samantha now owns and wears that dress.

I have used many buildings and places as backdrops for my story, and they are: Browns of Chester, Peckforton Castle, Grosvenor Hotel, Countess of Chester Hospital, Boathouse Pub, Chester Cathedral, Hopetown House (just outside Edinburgh), Bridge House, Shopmobility, Guild Hall, Chester Zoo, Blue Planet Aquarium, Brasserie Chez Gérard, and Boots.

I could not write these acknowledgements unless, after finishing my book, it had been proofread. Thank you to both my husband Peter and my friend Paula, who have spent many hours reading through and correcting this book. I know that it’s most probably driven them both crazy at times, trying to understand what I wanted to say. I tend to write and talk like Yoda from Star Wars, and my friend Paula has created a new word that relates just to me… I have Yodaisms! I even had my best friend in the world, Tracy, check over my acknowledgements!

And my thanks, once again, go to Raider Publishing International for accepting my second book, to Kim Maschak for having the patience to proofread my book, and also to Richard Baird for bearing with me over everything! Last but not least, I thank you for reading this; I hope you enjoy my latest offering.

Places and characters that are not mentioned in my acknowledgements are fictional and composite. They do not exist. They are depicted in my book for dramatic effect.

Contents

Echoes of the Past

New Beginnings

All Change… Again

Hormones Hell Hotel

The Perfume Incident

Perfect Days

One Wedding at a Time

Triggers, Part 1: Smokey Bacon

Triggers, Part 2: Photographs

In the Meadows

Covering Up

Sons…

… and Daughters

It’s All in the Mind

Family Business

Crises

Life Changes

Pains of Mind, Body, and Spirit

Is It Time to Wake Up?

Can’t See the Wood for the Trees

Guilt Is No Friend of the Innocent

Tears at Bedtime

The Results

Circle of Life

Everybody everywhere, given the right set of circumstances, is capable of anything and everything…

1

Echoes of the Past

Would you like to win the next game?

At the age of ten, Rachel would have done anything to win. He always won, but then he was the adult and adults always win… she was only a child. Rachel nodded her head.

He got up from the dining table underneath the windowsill and went to sit down on the armchair near the piano in the corner of the small living room. This was the only place in the room that you could not be seen from the kitchen, which with it being a small semi, led straight into the kitchen.

Once he was sat down, he slowly undid his fly. Quietly, and in the persuasive tone he only used for these occasions, he said, Okay you know what to do my little princess. Then I’ll let you win.

As always she was scared, but all of this was her fault. He had told her that this was their little secret and nobody else was to ever find out, if they did, she would be the one to blame. But today was different. Today she couldn’t take anymore. Today Rachel hesitated.

Patiently, he whispered, Come on…

When it was over, Rachel felt frightened and sick. In terror she fled from the living room, through the kitchen, out of the back door, past her mum who was in the back garden hanging out washing and into the Close. From there, she sprinted along the little alleyway, which ran up the hill towards the busy road. When she got to the top, she just stood there frozen to the spot, not making a sound. She felt paralysed.

* * *

Rachel remembered that house well. It was 
the house she had grown up in with her mum, dad and two brothers before she was sent away to live with her aunty and uncle in Chester. It didn’t seem to matter how many years had passed since those events, they were still raw and very real in her mind. The worst of her memories were of her dad and how he would sneak into her room late at night when the rest of the household was sleeping. Rachel already remembered this, so why was her mind showing her this all over again? There had to be something else that was bothering her.

Rachel remembered her mum chasing after her when she had fled the house. She had sobbed uncontrollably while her mother held her. She remembered her mother’s anger when she told her what her dad had just asked her to do and what had been happening at night over the past two years. She recalled how her mother had shouted at her for making up such stories.

Rachel changed overnight. She became sullen and aggressive. It was one of her teachers, Miss Evans that had noticed the difference in her behaviour. She had asked Rachel to stay behind after class one day. Sitting next to her, Miss Evans put her warm hand on hers and spoke to her very softly. Eventually Rachel trusted her and told her everything. Not just the card game incident, but also the regular visits her dad made to her bedroom when everyone was asleep and how he would put his hand up her nightie. She recalled the taste of his tobacco breath on her mouth and, once finished, how he crept out of her bedroom.

Rachel was taken to a safe house while the authorities went to arrest her dad. When they did, her mother told the authorities that her daughter was a compulsive and pathological liar. All charges were dropped against her father. Rachel hated competitions of any sort since the day she played cards with her father. Her mother had refused to have her back, and she had no further contact with her, her father or brothers since that day.

* * *

The tape in her personal cassette player gave 
a loud thud as it came to the end, crashing in her ears, causing Rachel to physically jump in the chair where she was sitting. For a few minutes she was that frightened little girl again.

Before she could bring herself out of the past, for a good minute or two, Rachel didn’t recognise her own home. The average sized lounge had been knocked through to the small dining room, with patio doors straight into the back garden, creating the illusion of one large space. To continue this illusion, all the walls were white with a hint of apple, and the oatmeal carpet was the length of both rooms. At either end of the room hung ceiling to wall mint green, heavy cotton curtains on dark wooden poles.

As Rachel became more and more aware of her surroundings, she remembered how John, her husband, had built the brick fire surround. It stretched along one wall incorporating the gas fire and a built in video/DVD cabinet with the television on the top in the corner near the window. On top of the television, pride of place stood her wedding day photograph. She still gazed at John like a smitten schoolgirl. His piercing blue eyes twinkled when he spoke to her. He still had his confident enigmatic smile and slinky dark brown hair combed back showing the gold stud in his ear that he still wore. His height together with his large frame made his six-foot-four-inch stature seem like that of a giant. She knew she would always feel safe with him. Just to the side of the dark wooden framed mirror above the fire, were individual school photographs of their two children; Susan, twelve, who was three years older than her nine year old sister Elizabeth… a good mixture of both her and John’s looks. Both girls had John’s large build and Rachel’s murky green eyes, with John’s perfect smile, showing their straight white teeth. Fortunately, neither of the girls had inherited Rachel’s washed out looking brown frizzy hair. They both had long dark brown slinky locks, which Rachel plaited every day. To finish the room off, they had bought a white leather three-piece suite, two green chequered rugs, one for the lounge and the other for the dining room. She was alone. One of her best friends, Ruth, who was a bit of a hippy, had lent her an audiocassette called, Retrieving Lost Parts of Your Soul. Ruth made it quite clear that she was to be on her own when she listened to it; somewhere she felt safe.

The banging of the front door catapulted her into action. John and the girls, Susan and Elizabeth had been on their regular Friday night out at the bowling alley’s under 13’s night. Taking the cassette out of the player and putting it away in its case, she quickly squirreled it away into her handbag…as if hiding a dirty secret. John and the girls were chatting and laughing as they all came in to join her. John automatically switched on the lights.

Still laughing, John said to Rachel jokingly, Flippin’ heck Rach… it’s like a shrine in here with all these candles!

Rachel answered by getting up, as if on autopilot, and blew them out. Rachel loved the smell of the smoke, sometimes better than scented candles themselves. Normally Rachel would have been joining in with the banter, but she had just been reminded of her very own personal Hell again and hadn’t recovered enough yet to hide this.

John sensed instantly that something was wrong with his wife, and turned to the girls saying, Come on you two, time’s marching on. Time for bed.

Elizabeth went up to Rachel, gave her a hug, and kissed her goodnight without question.

Susan was different; she protested very loudly, Why do I have to go to bed now? I’m nearly three years older than her. I should be allowed to stay up later.

Rachel didn’t want this war with Susan, but that’s just how it felt recently. She was tired.

But it was John who spoke, Susan… I said bed.

Susan’s tongue lashed out. Not at John, but Rachel.

Can’t she speak for herself?

John snapped at Susan.

SUSAN… BED… NOW!

Losing the battle, Susan’s parting words were once again to Rachel as she slammed the door on her way to bed.

I hate you.

John went to go after her, but Rachel got hold of his arm and said in a flat voice, Let her go.

I’m not having her speak to you like that.

It’s just a phase.

Rachel hadn’t told John that this had been going on for months.

He went into the kitchen, put the kettle on, made two cups of coffee and sat down next to her.

Seriously, Rach, you can’t let Susan speak to you like that.

She’s just being a teenager. Then trying to make light of it, she continued by saying It must be her hormones!

Knowing how much of a doting dad John was, and wanting to change the subject, Rachel asked how the bowling had gone. He almost fell for it.

Brilliant! Susan got two strikes in her first game and… hang on, I know what you’re trying to do… changing the subject

Look, John, honestly, it’s okay.

John got hold of Rachel’s chin and gently turned her face towards his and gently kissed her lips. He remembered how he had found Rachel when they had come home.

What were you doing when we came home?

You know I’ve had a funny feeling that something isn’t right?

John nodded his head.

Ruth suggested that I borrow one of her tapes called ‘Retrieving the Lost Parts of Your Soul’ to try and find out what’s wrong. She thought it might help.

Rach! You know I love your friends, but honestly, trying to find the lost parts of your soul, what a load of rubbish. There’s nothing wrong, Rach.

Rachel immediately went on the offensive.

She meant well. She thought it might have something to do with my father. You, Ruth, and Mandy are the only people that know the whole truth.

John could see that he had upset her and pulled her closer to him, kissed her on the forehead and said softly, I’m sorry… I just worry about you.

* * *

John and Rachel both worked for the same 
cleaning firm, The Spotless Cleaning Company. Rachel worked in the telesales office; she absolutely loved the job and the hours suited her. One week she would work five mornings, then the following week she would work five afternoons. This meant that she could take it in turns with Ruth, who had three daughters, to do the school run. John was a sales rep who worked in and around the London area from Monday till early Thursday afternoon. This meant that every Monday morning John would kiss his wife and daughters goodbye until he got home early Thursday evening. He hated doing this, but it paid not only enough money, with his bonuses, to pay for the essentials, like the mortgage, but also luxuries for his whole family.

* * *

The previous evening had been forgotten as 
Rachel waved John off at the front door in the morning. As she closed it behind her, she glanced up the stairs in the narrow hallway towards the three bedrooms and shouted up.

Ten minutes girls. We’ve got to go to Ruth’s and pick up Sam, Zoë and Lucy.

She could hear the girls bickering in the bathroom and shouted up.

There’s no time for that. Get yourselves ready.

She didn’t wait for a reply as she was already in the kitchen, which was tiny and every work surface cluttered. Rachel moved a pile of papers and some empty boxes of cereal to make room for her to do the girls’ sandwiches for school. She made a mental note to herself to tidy up; as she did every day. Thirty minutes later, they had picked up Ruth’s girls, taken them to school and she was on her way to work.

* * *

The Spotless Cleaning Company had only been 
established for nine years, but it already had numerous cleaning contracts with the vast majority of high street shops. It was the brainchild of a very young, dynamic couple… Prudence and Vince Henderson.

Pru, as she liked to be called, was quite petite and would now only wear designer labels and was more than a little snobby. Vince, on the other hand, wore beautiful suits, but was more down to earth and wore his wealth on his stomach. They had worked very hard developing the business. In the beginning, Pru would cold call businesses making appointments by using the Yellow Pages. Vince would go to the appointments and usually secure a contract. Then Pru and Vince would clean the premises themselves in the early years when they were struggling to establish themselves. In the previous seven years, they had sold franchises and the money was rolling in, which proved to them that there was money in muck.

Rachel drove past the Chester Business Park and made her way towards Wrexham. Shortly before the outskirts, she turned off at the brightly coloured sign giving directions to The Spotless Cleaning Company and went down the long driveway towards the big old Victorian building at the end. The crunching of the gravel stopped as she parked on the circular driveway. She got out of the car, took a deep breath, and closing her eyes, could smell the trees, the freshly cut grass and hear the birds talking to each other. Rachel loved working there.

She arrived just seconds after her colleague, Gloria Smith. The two women smiled at each other.

Hi, Gloria.

Good morning, Rachel.

Gloria had just celebrated her ruby wedding anniversary with husband John, who was still self-employed working with their son in his decorating business. They had two other children, both daughters, and a total of seven grandchildren. Gloria was very quiet and good at her job.

They walked towards the building together, past the two large bay windows, one both side of the equally large panelled front door, and entered. Pam, the receptionist, was already at her desk.