Dreams: A Sapphire Springs Novel, Book 1

By Savannah Morgan

Professionally Edited, New Content, Stand-Alone Book
For 18 and older

For years Devin Blackthorn has prided himself on being an honorable man. He stepped in to take care of Kylie James when his younger half-brother, Allen, abandoned her when she was nine months pregnant. He has spent eleven years taking care of Kylie and her son, Jamie, as if they were his own. He never asked for anything in return and he never allowed his dominant sexual feelings for Kylie to show, always maintaining a safe distance from the much younger woman. Devin has been tortured by erotic dreams of Kylie for years. At his limit, Devin is ready to admit he wants her for himself. But when secrets from Kylie’s past threaten her and Jamie, Devin’s real feelings come out and he can do no less than protect the woman he loves and the son of his heart.

Kylie James has made mistakes in her life, but her son is not one of them. For eleven years she has kept the secret of Allen’s betrayal and remained quiet of his crimes. But when Allen returns, making demands, Kylie is afraid he is up to his old ways once again. To stop Allen from destroying her son, Kylie must confront her past and reveal the secrets she has kept from everyone. Will the truth destroy the love she has found in Devin’s arms? How can she possibly protect her son from a monster who never wanted him to be born? And how can she keep the past from destroying all her dreams for the future?

When Devin learns Allen has targeted Kylie and Jamie, once again he must put all his resources into protecting them, even if it means destroying his brother to do it. Can Devin protect everything he holds dear, or will Allen get his greatest wish–destroying Devin and Kylie and the child he blames for the ruin of all his dreams?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Savannah Morgan
• Release date: Nov 11, 2013
• ISBN: 9781310333125

Savannah Morgan

NOTE: Dreams Sapphire Springs Book 1 has been heavily corrected and changed. If you bought a copy before 11/21/2013 please get the updated version now. I apologize for any inconvenience this has caused and hope I do much better with future book releases. Thank you for you understanding and patience. Savvy I began writing almost 20 years ago but only recently decided to publish. Writing has been one of the most enjoyable aspects of my life. It has allowed me to experience knew things, transported me to new places and allowed me to meet knew people. I also enjoy photography, graphic arts, and many other forms of artistic expression. I created the cover for Dreams and have created the cover for the next three novels in the series. Because I am usually behind the camera rather in front of it, I do not have an author's photo I can put up but I am working to correct this and hope to have it up soon. I have been married for nearly 25 years to my best friend, adventure/travel partner, confidant and greatest critic, Caleb. We have a unique relationship in that we do everything together. I call Caleb my greatest critic because he only wants the best for me and is always willing to give me honest feedback concerning my writing. We live in the Deep South, for now, but have lived all over the US and Germany. We have two Black Labrador Retrievers we adopted from rescue shelters. One is a full Black Lab and the other is a Lab/Australian Dingo mix. Thank you for your interest in my books, I look forward to giving you many years of enjoyable reading. Please feel free to contact me on Facebook, tumblr, or visit me on my website at www.author-savannahmorgan.com. Savvy

Book preview

Dreams

Sapphire Springs Book 1

by

Savannah Morgan

Copyright 2013 Savannah Morgan

Smashwords Edition

Dreams

Sapphire Springs Book 1

Copyright © 2013 Savannah Morgan

Copyright © 2014 Savannah Morgan

All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed to any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. If you feel you have received a pirated copy of this book please remove it and purchase a copy legally. Please see about the author for website information on where books are distributed.

Cover art by Savannah Morgan

Cover image licensed through Shutterstock and graphically altered by Savannah Morgan

This book contains mature themed content that is not suitable for readers 17 and under.

This book is a work of fiction and any resemblances to persons, living or dead, or places events or locales, is purely accidental. The characters and town are the sole creation of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.

Dedications

For my husband, my best critic, inspiration, partner in everything, and my best friend. Thank you for all of your support, patience and help. All my love.

And for Morgan, Kathy, Sharen, Treini and Colleen, my awesome gal pals, for your encouragement, patience, handholding, and especially the coffee. You ladies are the best.

Acknowledgements

A special thank you to the following for making Dreams possible:

Morgan, without you Dreams would have never been realized.

Angel Editing Services for all of your hard work.

Treini for your hard work, expertise, and friendship

Table of Contents

Title/Copyright Page

Important Notifications

Dedications

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Coming Soon

About the Author

Endnotes

Family Tree

Chapter One

Devin awoke soaked in sweat, his breathing labored, as he fought against the damp sheet twisted around his hard body. It was only a dream, he cautioned himself.

He felt the lingering assault of the erotically charged images that had once again disturbed his sleep. Devin swore he could feel the strands of her silky hair brush against his stimulated flesh, the touch of her warm, soft lips as she kissed her way down his aroused body, the sound of her sweet, tempting voice beckoning him to make love to her.

Groaning at the thought of having her, his heart beat wildly, even as he realized he was alone in his bed and it had only been a dream. He fisted his torturous erection in an attempt to gain some relief, or control, he wasn’t exactly certain which. All he knew was he wanted her.

He needed her.

Night after night, erotic dreams of her assailed him. Gripped him in an inferno of heat, lust, seduction, and sensations, until he thought he would go insane from desiring her. He couldn’t understand why the dreams kept coming. Why was he being tortured night after night, week after week, year after year, with images he could never make real?

Why? Why, damn it? She’s just a child, Devin growled in a sleepy, lust filled voice as his fist clinched and beat once against the mattress as he attempted to slow his breathing and calm himself.

She’s not a child anymore, a voice in his mind cautioned him.

He knew it was true. She wasn’t a child. It was only one of many excuses he used that allowed him to keep her at arm’s length. And that just pissed him off all the more, because those excuses had worn thin a long damn time ago.

He was angry from being tortured by his dreams. So damn angry over the hopeless situation they were all in. But mostly angry with his brother for returning after ten long years, having left Devin to pick up the pieces and take care of his younger brother’s responsibilities.

It wasn’t that Devin minded taking care of her; he didn’t. On some level he had always known she was meant to be his, but when things had finally began to fall into place for them, his brother, Allen, had returned to claim the life he had so carelessly thrown away all those years ago. Now Devin was expected to step aside and let Allen have everything Devin coveted, provided for, cared about? Was that what he was supposed to do now? Just move aside and let Allen sweep in again? Devin knew he couldn’t do it. Hell, he didn’t want to do it.

He slowed his breathing, releasing the anger once again. Being angry was getting him nowhere. Being the good guy wasn’t getting him much farther. Something had to change and fast or he was going to completely lose it and do something that could destroy everything and everyone Devin loved.

Devin had always prided himself on his control, on doing the right thing. But, in this situation, doing the right thing didn’t add up to him stepping aside. Something inside of him refused to let go of the idea she belonged to him, had been meant to be his from the very beginning.

Damn it, even her father had wanted it. Not that Kyle James had actually said the words, but he had given her to Devin to protect, to care for. Surely that meant something, he pleaded to the dark, empty room.

He had done everything he could to take care of her and the baby, to make certain they were safe and provided for, and the only thing he had for his efforts were the hauntingly familiar, erotically charged dreams of her in his bed, under him, at his mercy.

The dream last night had been vivid, but then again dreams of her always were. Why should this time be any different? But it was different. Something was very different about this dream.

Devin reined in his swirling emotions, taking long, slow breaths as he worked to regain his control. That legendary control he was so famous for, had saved him on more than one occasion, and had saved her as well. He repeated his breathing technique until he was sure he was firmly back in command of his mind and body before releasing the grip he had on his raging cock.

Calmer now, he drew in another breath and could swear her sweet vanilla scent still lingered on the sheets and hung heavily in the air. He could still feel the softness of her skin, the silkiness of her hair as it glided over his heated, aroused body. He ran his hand over the cool sheet beside him, confirming she was not there, and never had been.

Devin scrubbed his hands over his face, frustrated at the worthless attempt to rid himself of the feelings created by the erotic dreams. He knew it wouldn’t work. Nothing seemed to ever work after one of these damn dreams. His breathing continued to be labored, his heart continued to beat too fast, and his cock remained torturously hard for hours, sometimes days, after one of these dreams

He had to find a way to stop this from happening. She was not his. He could never make her his. Especially now, when it appeared she was going to go back to Allen.

Look harder, Devin, appearances can be deceiving.

Devin opened his eyes and looked around his dark bedroom. The voice sounded so real. Was someone in his house? In his room? Or had he finally lost his mind and was now hearing voices?

That would be alright. He spoke aloud. "Losing my mind would at least be a real reason to have to live this way.

He fought the sheets and blanket as he rolled over onto his side, blinking rapidly to remove the blurry vision of sleep and the all too real images lingering from the dream, to see the lighted red numbers of his alarm clock.

He groaned.

Four o’clock in the fucking morning.

Devin rolled onto his back, throwing a heavy forearm over his eyes. Only masochists are awake at this hour, he mumbled with aggravation. "Masochists and saints, and sexy as sin coffee shop owners."

He groaned again, untangled himself from the bedcovers once and for all, and swung his long, powerful legs over the side of the bed so he could sit upright. Devin braced his head in his hands, planting his elbows firmly on his knees as he ran his fingers through his hair before gripping his head tightly.

Something has to give. Something has to make this torture end. It must stop! His words came out as a growl, but he was pleading. He knew it in his soul. He had to do something or he was going to lose his mind.

His mind whirled with possible solutions, some doable, while others were simply impossible fantasies. If he were to be honest with himself, he knew it could never go anywhere, but that didn’t stop his desire from rising to insatiable levels during these times. It didn’t stop him from acknowledging his wants, his dreams; no matter how much guilt and disgust they caused in him later.

During these times, after just awakening from one of the dreams, and God knew he had a lot of them to choose from, he could admit he was only a man with an aching need for one woman. It made no difference that she was fourteen years younger than him, nor did it matter that he was the one responsible for keeping her at arms’ length. In these times, when it was too early in the morning for lies and deceit and he faced his demons head-on and alone, Devin could admit he didn’t give a damn that she had once been his brother’s girl, or that she had given birth to his brother’s child. He couldn’t give a shit about the age difference, or that he was no good for her.

The only thing that mattered was they had built a life together, a platonic life, but still a life. Her son, his nephew, looked to him as a father, not Allen. She came to him with her joys and her sorrows, her happiness and her fears. No one else but him.

And in these early hours of darkness and dreams, he had to admit, he did the same with her. She was the only person he wanted to share everything with. The only person he wanted at his side at any given time.

What was the big deal with Allen coming back? What did they owe him? Allen had left, carelessly thrown away the very thing, the two people Devin wanted more than his next breath.

Devin was man enough now, ten years later, to admit, if only to himself, that he wanted more than the platonic life they had created. He wanted her in his life and in his bed. He wanted the right to openly claim her as his.

As for her son, Jamie, the boy was for all intents and purposes, his son already. Devin had helped raise the boy. He had been there through the inevitable bumps, bruises, and occasional broken bones that all tough little boys seemed to go through. He’d been there for the triumphs and failures, birthday parties, scary dreams, and teaching the boy to ride a bike. Wasn’t that what fathers did? Wasn’t it the father’s duty to slay the dragons, teach right from wrong, and show his son it was okay to love?

Devin shook his head to clear it. He wasn’t a fool. The dreams were not some deep- seated desire to be a father. He knew they were his repressed desires to have Kylie in his life, in his arms, and in his bed.

Devin wasn’t one to psychoanalyze his feelings, his desires. He was a man of action, always had been. So why was he playing the pussy card and trying to analyze something he already knew the answer too?

Why am I just stepping aside and allowing Allen to take them from me?

Be certain before you make a move.

That voice again. It had been dogging him for months. When Devin was certain of a plan of action, the voice played devil’s advocate. When he decided to leave it be, the voice would come back and argue to forge ahead. When he questioned why he was letting Allen just sweep back in after ten years of being gone, that voice challenged him to be certain.

Devin shook his head again. He really was losing his mind.

He was handling this situation with Kylie all wrong. He was thinking with his integrity and not his heart or head. He needed to tackle this problem the way he would any investigation; with logic and facts.

He needed a shower and then he needed to sit down and think about a plan of action. He needed to get his shit together and figure out his next step, or he was going to lose her to Allen for good, and that was just not going to happen.

He stood and walked to the in-suite bathroom, the deep cushion of the expensive carpet barely registering in his mind. Usually, he enjoyed the plush decadence of his home, especially his master suite, but today, with the dream still lingering in the periphery of his mind and his cock still raging in need of her soft, submissive body, not even the opulence of his sanctuary penetrated.

If he was going to do this, and he was pretty damn certain he was, he needed a plan. He needed to figure out what the issues were and how to tackle them, defeat them. With what he knew at this moment, there were four problems with this situation. Well, there was a hell of a lot more than four, but four that needed to be examined first. The first was Allen. Why was he back after running out on her when she was pregnant?

Because he’s a punk-ass mama’s boy that needs his ass handed to him.

Helpful, Voice. Real fucking helpful, Devin mumbled low. Although, that voice wasn’t completely off the mark; Allen was a mama’s boy and their mother was one for the record books.

Shower first, then breakdown the situation. Plan, implement, and conquer. That was his motto. It had served him well for over twenty-five years. It would do so in this situation as well.

Kylie burrowed further under the covers. Not now. Just a little longer. Please, she pleaded as the noise infiltrated her sleep. I turned you off. I know I did. She grumbled in her sleep and tried to bury her head underneath her pillows to block the noise and keep the sensual dream continuing. But the incessant buzzing shattered her sleep and her dreams...of him.

She groaned through a yawn as she reached over to turn her alarm clock off. She cringed at the brightly lit four, zero, zero. She had the morning off, but had once again forgotten to turn off her alarm. Since she was awake, she might as well check the shop’s messages. Better safe than sorry, she thought.

She reached for the phone and began dialing the coffee shop. She yawned again as she hit the last number in the code to retrieve her messages. The first message was from Romando Salvitori.

He and his brother, Roberto, owned the Salvitori Inn and were one of her best customers for specialty breads and desserts. They were also close friends of hers who had taken over their family’s B&B around the same time she was opening her coffee shop, KJ’s Sweets and Treats. They had been an invaluable support system while getting the coffee shop off the ground.

Where Kylie had been opening a brand new business, Roman and Roberto were changing the family business from a B&B to a full service inn. However, her connection with the Salvitoris went far deeper than just business friends. Roman and Roberto’s parents had opened their home to Kylie after her parents’ deaths and the birth of her son, Jamie.

Although, Sofia Salvitori had bullied her into moving in with them, which had developed into a major rift between Kylie and Sofia, her mother’s best friend. Looking back on it all now, she couldn’t say what made her believe Sofia or made her think her parents were all that close to the Salvitoris.

Kylie shook her head trying to dislodge the thoughts, but they seemed to want to take root this morning. Sofia had basically strong-armed and threatened Kylie into living with them not long after Jamie had been born. Kylie couldn’t deny Sofia had been a great help to her while she had been trying to get on her feet. It was just that many of the things Sofia had used to convince her to move away from Devin and in with the Salvitoris didn’t ring true anymore, and hadn’t for years now.

She didn’t have much to do with Sofia anymore, not after their last argument several years ago, but she still allowed Sofia to see Jamie once in a while, and of course she would never deny Armando, Sofia’s husband, or their children, Roberto, Romando, Carlotta and Maria from being part of hers and Jamie’s lives. They were like family. With Jamie being Kylie’s only living blood relation, she knew how important family was, even if they were only family of the heart.

After that final blow up between Kylie and Sofia, there was something about the woman Kylie no longer trusted. In all honesty, Kylie’s distrust of Sofia started long before that last altercation between them. To this day, she couldn’t figure out why Sofia had tried so hard to get Kylie and Jamie away from Devin Blackthorn. Like that would ever happen.

Kylie would never break ties with Devin or the Blackthorns or Jamie’s McKinnon uncles, Braden and Duncan. Heck, she couldn’t even forbid Jamie from knowing his biological father, no matter how much she felt Allen was a danger to them.

But in Kylie’s mind and heart, Devin was the only real father her son knew, and that relationship was more important to her than any perceived rights Sofia felt she had. Devin had always been there for her, provided for her and Jamie when her parents had died. He had taken care of her and had even been in the delivery room when Kylie gave birth; a fact that most of the town thought was sweet, even if there were some of the older citizens who still shook their fingers in an effort to shame Devin and Kylie for their closeness.

She had been so young when Jamie was born, so confused with everything that was happening. She had felt assaulted from every direction, except from Devin. Sofia had been trying to get her to move in with her and her family. Nadine McKinnon, Allen’s mother, had been on the attack once again. She was devastated over the loss of her parents, feeling adrift with no familial connection to anyone. And then there was everything she had been through with Allen and his abrupt disappearance. She couldn’t even feel safe with Allen’s absence, because she had no idea if he would return, and with her parents gone, she had no one except Devin and his father, Dominick, to turn to for protection. Add to that Nadine’s constant threats of taking the baby once it was born, Kylie had been completely mired in problems and fear.

She groaned at the memories flooding her this morning.

In her opinion, Nadine McKinnon was a soulless bitch who needed to ride her broomstick straight back to hell. She shook her head. She didn’t need to be thinking about Nadine. She wasn’t the problem right now. Allen was.

Why is he back? she asked the empty room as Romando’s voice continued to hyperventilate in her ear over the bread order for a convention that was still a week and a half away.

Kylie chuckled as his voice rose higher and higher. Get a grip, Roman.

She should probably just forward to the next call, but listening to him was more than a little funny and well, she was awake at four in the morning when she didn’t need to be and old ghosts were assaulting her from every direction; something needed to make her laugh.

As Romando continued on with his tizzy, Kylie’s mind wandered again. As usual when her mind wandered, it went straight to Devin Blackthorn. He always seemed to be there on the periphery, if not dead center, of her thoughts and life, especially when she needed someone. Every time she needed a friend, a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh or share with, Devin was her first choice.

Why can’t he see how good we could be together?

She knew the age difference bothered him, but really, he was only fourteen years older than her. At this point in their lives, age didn’t matter. It wasn’t as if she was still a minor, which she had been when she first met Devin, or that he was old enough to be her father, as he had constantly stated he was for years after they had become friends.

Their friendship began when she had only been seventeen, pregnant, and feeling so very alone. As an only child and no family other than her parents, she didn’t have anyone she could talk to. Not that she had ever confided in Devin the real issues plaguing her at that time, but she should have.

She knew that now, at twenty-six, it was easy to look back and say what she should have done, but at seventeen she hadn’t had a clue where to turn. She couldn’t go to her parents with her concerns. They had felt the best thing for all of them was for Kylie to marry Allen. Her father had even said something along the lines of ‘if you play, you better be willing to pay’. Her mother was a little kinder, but also believed it was only right for Kylie to marry Allen for the sake of the baby.

What a crock that was. Allen didn’t want Jamie, and she doubted ten years had changed his opinion on the matter.

She forced thoughts of Allen from her mind. She didn’t want to think about him right now. That was a problem for the light of day, or at least a lot of lights being on in the room. If she let herself think about him now, while the moon was still high in the sky, she was likely to panic and pack her and Jamie up and run to Three Peaks, Devin’s Ranch, whether he wanted them there or not.

Allen was up to something. He was always up to something, but this time he was up to something where Jamie was concerned.

Kylie may hate him for everything he had done to her when they were younger, but she would be damned if she would allow that bastard to hurt her son. Jamie was her life. She loved him with everything in her and would kill to keep him safe.

With that thought, killing Allen would only be a bonus in her opinion.

Roman was still going strong on the message he had left and Kylie was becoming annoyed; annoyed with Roman’s whining as much as she was with her thoughts of Allen. She sat up in bed and leaned against the headboard.

She needed to tell Devin the truth. That was all there was to it. If he got mad at her for keeping certain things from him, he would just have to get over it. Allen was a threat she could not defeat on her own. She was smart enough to know that. She was also smart enough to know, no matter how angry Devin might get when he learned the truth, he would never allow anything to happen to Jamie. She hoped he could forgive her enough to feel the same way about her.

Oh, good grief, Roman! It’s a damn bread order, not the end of the world, she grumbled in exasperation as she started to punch in the code to advance to the next call. She changed her mind and hung up instead.

She looked around her bedroom. The moon was still bright enough that she could see, but there were deep shadows around the room. Shadows where someone could hide, jump out at her, overtake her when she was least prepared to defend herself.

A cold shiver raced down her spine and left goose bumps along her arms and thighs. Don’t go there Kylie Ann. You are safe. You will always be safe with Devin, she reminded herself. Although Devin wasn’t here, was he?

She forced herself to think of better times; a time when she had been completely safe and protected, a time when she had shared this very house with Devin Blackthorn. This had been Devin’s bedroom. Actually, this had once been Devin’s house. That was before he sold it to her, for a tenth of what it was worth.

He had tried to give it to her outright, but she had refused. She never wanted to be a burden to him and as much as it probably would have helped not to have a house payment, she couldn’t take advantage of him like that. However, she hated his new house. Oh, that was a lie. She loved the house he had built and where he had built it. It was everything she had ever wanted in a house. The only problem was it wasn’t her house too. The size of Devin’s new home gave her a frightened feeling in the pit of her stomach. Why would he build such a huge home if he wasn’t preparing to settle down with a wife and have a family? The place was too huge for a bachelor.

God, please don’t let him have found someone else, she prayed openly. He had to see she and Jamie were all he needed. She couldn’t handle him making his life with some other woman, starting a family of his own.

You’re a selfish woman, Kylie Ann. She tried to feel guilty, but honestly, she had been in love with Devin Blackthorn since she was nineteen years old. Eight years was a long time to hope and pray for him to notice her as a woman, but it wasn’t long enough to give up her dreams of them being a family together.

She smiled as her mind turned back to Three Peaks. It truly was a beautiful spot to have a home. The three mountain peaks as a backdrop to the spring fed lake and the gorgeous house he had built, could only be described as picturesque.

Devin used to ask her if she and Jamie would move out to the ranch with him in the beginning, but she had had to refuse. It was just that she didn’t want people to think she was using him. There was also Jamie to consider. She couldn’t, in good conscience, move in with Devin when she knew she would eventually try to seduce him and when she failed, as she had back in August, it would change everything. Heck, everything had already changed between them, and not for the better. Devin wasn’t even speaking to her anymore after she had so brazenly kissed him and chased him off.

Before that, Devin had wanted her and Jamie to come out to the ranch all the time. Or at least he had until she had been so wanton and rubbed all over him like a cat in heat, kissing him as if she had the right to do so. She felt her cheeks warm at the thought of that kiss. He had responded.

Well, she had thought he had, until he kissed her on the forehead like he had a thousand times before and sent her home like some silly little girl...as he had a thousand times before. Then, when he returned from a business trip the next week, he had seemed so angry with her, and then stopped talking to her all together.

No matter how upset he was with her right now, it still didn’t stop her wayward dreams of the three of them living at Three Peaks as a family. She shook her head. She couldn’t move Jamie out there, not with things like they were between her and Devin. She wasn’t seventeen anymore. Her schoolgirl crush had long ago developed into a deep-seated, smoldering desire that could ruin everything if she was foolish enough to act on it, again.

Devin has to make the next move, she reminded herself.

But he had kissed her last summer. Yeah and where did that get you?

Nowhere, that’s where. She had offered and he had gently shot her down.

Kylie sighed. He doesn’t want you like that. Stop all these silly dreams and get over it.

She stared at the phone. She had eight more calls to listen to and a busy day ahead. She didn’t need to be sitting in her bed spinning day dreams of being with Devin Blackthorn.

She dialed the coffee shop again and waited for it to connect. Grow up Kylie Ann. You don’t get everything you want in this life. She punched in the code for her messages and waited for Romando’s voice to irritate her again.

You have nine new messages. Message one. One-twenty-seven A.M.

Nine? I had eight. Who in the world is calling the shop at four in the morning?

Devin stepped out of the shower and quickly dried off. His cock was still torturously hard, even though he had just brought himself off twice in the shower. The dream refused to turn him loose this morning, even as his mind worked on a plan to rid himself of the tormenting dreams.

He was an investigator, damn it. He needed to come at this situation as he would any mystery, any assignment. As with any investigation, he needed to start with what he knew and figure out what he was missing.

He needed to get organized.

Devin wrapped the towel around his waist and headed back into his bedroom. He hadn’t turned on any lights, but it wasn’t as if he needed them. He had designed and built this house himself. He knew the layout like the back of his hand. He knew where every piece of furniture was placed, where every door was located. He walked through the huge master bedroom and on to his private office.

He tapped the wall lightly, slapping the rocker switch for the lights and made his way to his desk. The first thing he needed to do was make a list. He grabbed a legal pad and pen and then sat down, prepared to get this started. He had wasted enough time over the last ten years. Now was the time for action.

Shit, it was long past time for action, he admonished himself.

He didn’t need his computer for this. He didn’t need to research the players or search locations. No, everything about this case was intimately ingrained in his mind. The only thing he needed to do was remove his personal feelings and he would be able to determine what he knew, what he needed to know, and what his next step should be.

At the top of the page in bold letters he wrote Operation Dreams. After all, that was what all of this was about; making the dreams stop so he could get on with his life, or at the very least, get a full night of uninterrupted sleep. However, the ultimate goal was finding peace and a way of having it all. If he was going to do this; he was determined to make all his dreams come true. Not just the erotic ones.

However, he needed something to keep him on track. He had called KJ’s before jumping into the shower, but had sat there with his thumb up his ass and didn’t say anything. He was more awake, more prepared to state his demands now. He reached for the phone and dialed KJ’s again. At the prompt to leave his message, he kept it short and simple, if not a little gruff.

It’s Devin. We need to talk. Today.

He hung up the phone and looked back down to his empty list. Below the heading he quickly drew three lines, creating four columns. He titled each one with what he felt were the major issues he faced at this time. He was certain more would come up as he worked but for now, there were these four points that had to be investigated, addressed, and solved. The first was Allen, the next was Nadine, Kylie’s name headed the third column, and in the last column he wrote his own name, Devin. The only way this was going to work was if he approached it as logically, unemotionally, and as honestly as he could.

Keeping that in, mind he began listing what he knew about Allen. It was hard to be unbiased. After all, Allen was his brother. He was also a huge disappointment and an even bigger mystery in Devin’s eyes. How could any man leave his girlfriend without a word when she was eight months pregnant with his child?

Chapter Two

Devin stood staring out the wall of glass to the lake and mountains behind his home. Images of the dream were still plaguing him. Not even organizing his thoughts and coming up with a plan had quieted them. However, he was determined to see this through, even with the erotic dreams torturing him.

Making the list had brought up so much more than answers, or even questions. It had brought forth his feelings and desires, along with some buried, hurtful emotions. The very things he was trying to get away from so he could look at this from an investigator’s point of view. It had also triggered painful memories and feelings from his childhood. The most damning were those of Nadine and his confusing family.

Devin’s early years with his family were the definition of dysfunctional. His biological parents had never married, but fought with single-minded determination to destroy one another. Dominick Blackthorn had battled his ex-lover for the right to raise his son and extract the venomous bitch from their lives. Those were his dad’s words, not Devin’s, but Devin could understand them better now that he was an adult. Nadine had latched onto Dominick’s desire to have his son and used it as a weapon to exact her revenge for not becoming a Blackthorn. That coveted title had been her reason for becoming pregnant in the first place. Unfortunately for Devin, he had been stuck in the middle, an unwitting pawn in the Blackthorn/Allen version of the War of the Roses.

At an early age, he began to understand what was really going on between his parents. Dominick wanted Devin. He wanted the right to raise his son and be in his life. Nadine wanted Dominick’s money, prestige, and power, and wasn’t too overjoyed with the role of motherhood, but was willing to use anything to her advantage.

It wasn’t until Dominick met and married Kathleen Devereaux that Devin’s life began to change for the better. Dominick had fallen fast and hard for the heiress to the Devereaux fortune, and within a few months of meeting her, had made her his wife and Devin’s mother. Fortunately for both Dominick and Devin, Katy had loved them just as much as they did her.

Of course with Dominick and Katy’s marriage, all of Nadine’s hopes of ruling the vast Blackthorn Empire turned to dust. Not that they hadn’t already been dust once Dominick realized the true nature of Nadine Allen. But one could never consider Nadine out for long. She just changed her goals and continued the war, this time, by trying to take Devin from his newly created happy home.

Katy had finally put an end to the war over Devin when he was seven. Having the unique advantage of being in the home she was able to testify to Nadine’s machinations. Unfortunately, it took another five years to sever Nadine’s maternal rights and by then, she had married Robert McKinnon and had had three more sons: Allen, Braden, and Duncan.

Devin could have no more left his younger brothers to Nadine than Dominick and Katy could have left him to her. Although Nadine no longer had maternal rights to Devin, Devin had made a point to keep the door open so he could at least know and, if need be, protect his McKinnon brothers.

Dominick and Katy, knowing the real Nadine and what she was capable of, did everything they could to incorporate the young boys into the Blackthorn family fold, even though Dominick and Katy had five children of their own: Grayson, Ian, Nick, Cade and eventually, Elizabeth. The only girl in a sea of older, protective brothers, Braden and Duncan included. Allen had never wanted nor participated in what Dominick, Katy or Devin tried to provide. A fact that still broke Devin’s heart to this day; things should have been so different for all of them.

Ah, but if he had accepted what was offered, you wouldn’t have ever had Kylie, nor would you be standing on the brink of having her forever.

Shut-up, Voice, Devin growled, even though he knew it was the truth. His heart wasn’t quite as busted up over his brother’s mistakes as it once was. As a matter of fact, Devin was quite satisfied that Allen had been such a disappointment and had screwed up so majorly. Kylie was his and Allen could go get fucked as far as he was concerned.

Devin forced his thoughts back to what he had unearthed in his list making. As an adult, Devin never thought of Nadine. She was his biological mother, but that was where the connection ended. However, in dealing with Kylie and the past, there was no getting around Nadine and her involvement, because where Allen was, you could bet your sweet ass Nadine was in the background pulling the strings.

The saddest part of all of this was that Dominick had spoken the truth about Nadine Allen McKinnon. She was poison, pure and simple. She destroyed everything and everyone in her path, including her sons if they would have let her.

All anyone had to do was look at the unhealthy hold Nadine had on Allen to see how her poisonous nature could affect someone. Devin had always known his biological mother had issues, but her obsession with her second born son, her exceeding possessiveness of Allen, tipped way over into insanity. At times, he had to wonder if it hadn’t morphed into something else. He refused to even consider that. Nadine was a crazy bitch, but she wasn’t a criminal.

Thankfully, Nadine was so self-absorbed she only considered Allen as her son; refusing to claim Devin, Braden, and Duncan on the grounds that they had betrayed her by siding with the Blackthorns. Unfortunately, that left Allen with all of Nadine’s attention and caused a rift that would never be healed between the four brothers, especially between Devin and Allen. Add Kylie and Jamie into the mix, if Allen really wanted them, and you were looking at a possibly explosive situation.

The list Devin had made had revealed two things of great importance. The first was the detrimental relationship between Allen and Nadine made it impossible to pinpoint where one ended and the other began. Devin had had to link the two columns into one because of Nadine’s influence over her second son. The other thing that had been made clear to him was how little Kylie had referred to Allen in the ten years he had been gone. If they were really getting back together as Allen eluded, then wouldn’t she have shown some sign that she had missed him during that time. As far as Devin knew, not even Jamie had known about his birth father before Allen came back, which meant Devin had been a complete shit by not talking this through with Kylie long before now.

He redirected his focus back on what he had learned through the list. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t known before, but it was quite eye opening how cold and hard Nadine appeared on paper. The fact that she had infused all of her hatred into Allen only made his brother a major hurdle for Devin to clear so he could be with Kylie. Not that that would deter Devin from going after what he wanted. It was just that he didn’t want Jamie to go through the hell that he had as child, while his parents and Nadine had battled it out.

There had to be a way for Devin to see what this was between him and Kylie without involving Allen and putting Jamie in the middle. And that was the first major issue on Devin’s list. How to explore a relationship with Kylie without setting her and Jamie up as the prize in a war between him and his brother? Which led Devin to the next issue on his list; no matter what Kylie’s feelings were regarding Allen today, she had at one time been in love with him. So in love, she had become pregnant with his child.

Did she still love him? Was there any possibility she still hoped and dreamed the three of them could be a family? Devin wasn’t getting that from what had been shown to him through his investigation so far, but he had to know where Kylie stood on the issue of Allen. If she wanted to be with him, then there wasn’t much Devin could do about it.

Think Blackthorn. See what is in front of your face. Drop the damn wall between you and start FIGHTING FOR YOUR GIRL!

That damn voice again! But it did have a point. Devin had spent ten years keeping Kylie at arms’ length, never allowing her to know how he felt for her or what he wanted with her. They had started off as friends and then turned into confidants. Now he couldn’t say what their relationship was. It was like being married, but not living together or having sex.

These recurring erotic dreams of her had taught him one thing though. Although they were vivid, lifelike, and they hounded him nightly now, they had started years ago, briefly tangling into one dream or another, a few times a year when his guard was down or he had spent too much of the previous night swimming in alcohol and a woman he really hadn’t wanted. Simply a pale substitute for the one he did.

Back then he could deal with the dreams, if not with ease, at least with determination to have his feelings end when the dream was over. Now the dreams plagued him nightly, and had for the last several months, ever since his brother, Allen, had reentered her life.

Liar. The dreams have been nightly for nearly a year. Long before Allen’s return.

Devin blew out a breath in an attempt to ignore the voice, but he couldn’t. The dreams had been coming every night for nearly a year. He dismissed all thoughts of Allen and what his return might mean and focused on the real issue. Allen wasn’t the problem. Allen had never really been the problem. Devin was his own worst enemy. If he had just done the right thing, the thing they all had needed him to do and made Kylie his, Allen’s return wouldn’t have mattered. Hell, he could have even handled Allen for her, if that was what she had wanted.

And wouldn’t that be just the kick in the ass he deserved if that was the truth. If Kylie would have preferred Devin to handle his little brother and kept her and Jamie away from Allen, then he was a bigger ass than he thought.

He tipped his head back on his shoulders in an attempt to loosen his neck. He was just spinning fantasies now. There was no evidence Kylie felt that way. He was only projecting his own wishful thinking on the situation. Something he had been battling all morning. He had to keep his feelings, his wants and desires, out of this if he was never going to get to the bottom of what was really going on.

The thought of the women he had used throughout the years as substitutes for her, only made Devin realize Kylie truly was the only woman he wanted to share any part of his life with. She was the first person he wanted to see in the mornings and the last he wanted to see at night.

The only thing they did not share was sex, and a formal commitment. Not that that had stopped Devin, on more than one occasion, from ditching a date to go to Kylie when she needed him or just invited him over to have dinner with her and Jamie. He’d dealt with enough drama over the years to know he had done that way too often. He had been a shit to those women, much the same way he was being a shit to Kylie now. Why was he always the first one to cut bait and get the hell out? Not that he had really gotten out of anything with Kylie. He was standing in his office looking out at the mountains after getting himself off twice because he had erotic dreams of her.

Damn, he was so fucked up.

Is that supposed to be some sort of news bulletin? Stop fucking around, Blackthorn. Do something. Jesus, at least get dressed and go over to her house. Tell her enough is enough and it’s time for things to change. It’s time for her to get her ass home where she belongs.

Devin groaned, he knew that last part was one hundred percent his own voice. He was projecting again. He laughed. Hell, maybe he had lost his mind if he was really thinking the voice in his head was someone else, even if it did have the same tenor as his father’s.

Devin shook his head to clear it. He needed to work this out fast, but there was all this history cluttering his mind. Ten years of history rifling in his head like a damn shit storm trying to drive him crazy.

Allen had been gone for ten years. The same ten years Devin had been playing house with Kylie. In all that time, Kylie had never once confided in him that she missed Allen or wanted him back. Hell, she hadn’t even mentioned his brother in the last seven years.

Why did he think she suddenly wanted Allen now? If she knew how he felt, would that change her decision to be with Allen? Was she even with Allen?

Damn it, he didn’t know what the hell was going on. He had been blindsided when he saw them together back in August. When he had walked into Kylie’s coffee shop with one thought on his mind, finally telling her how he felt, but what he found was Kylie sitting at a table with a man, their heads close together...

Devin stopped his thought process and really examined the scene he had walked in on. A perfect picture of that day bloomed in his mind. It hit him then.

That wasn’t true. The man had been leaning across the table toward her but she was pulling back, putting distance between them, and then she looked up, locking her eyes with Devin’s. Those beautiful, evergreen colored eyes of hers had softened and warmed, before turning the emerald