I Blame My Mother

By Bryan M. Knight

Apart from the headline-grabbing news of children having been murdered by their mothers, women are generally considered to be nurturers, not abusers. But mothers abuse their children in alarming numbers. 3 million cases of child abuse (6 million children) are reported to child protection services in the U.S. each year – Over 40% of abusers are mothers, either alone or with another adult.

This abuse, while not as dramatic as drowning, poisoning or stabbing, is nevertheless life-shattering for the betrayed children.

Mothers are more likely than fathers to “get away” with verbal, physical or sexual abuse of their offspring because:

-- they have more opportunity (usually being the main caregiver)
-- society assigns them a nurturing, wholesome role
-- we are reluctant to accept that mothers can be cruel to their own children.

When I requested contributions from fellow therapists for this book at least 3 out of 10 asked “why not fathers?” [as abusers] and some even sent stories of male perpetrators rather than mothers.

When I mention that I was sexually abused, people automatically assume it was by a man. Such is the bias that abusers are mostly men.

But this book is focused on the harm (whether deliberate or unwittingly) done to their children by mothers in Canada, Australia, the U.S., the U.K., New Zealand and similar countries.

Of course, no such examination of abuse by mothers would be complete without suggesting actions to remedy – and more importantly, prevent – further harm.

You may be shocked by some of the true stories herein. Although the names, locations and details have been altered for confidentiality and anonymity, the essence of what you are about to read is factual.

Many of the case histories are from my own private practice. Others were contributed by therapists whom I thank but can’t name without perhaps providing an unintentional clue to the identity of the survivors. Other tales are composites. Many (especially the shorter ones) are direct quotes.

The intent of this book is to provide adult survivors of childhood verbal, physical or sexual abuse caused by their mothers with practical ways to deal with such a negative legacy. And to prompt thinking on ways that abuse of children can be prevented in the future.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Bryan M. Knight
• Release date: Sep 14, 2013
• ISBN: 9780992131302

Bryan M. Knight

Montreal, Canada's foremost hypno-psychotherapist, Dr Bryan Knight, is the doting grandfather of Emma, Aidan, Jacob, Olivia, Clive, Jonah, Louisa and Holden. (All gorgeous and smart, of course).Dr. Knight holds a degree in psychology from Sir George Williams University in Montreal, a Master's in social work from McGill University in Montreal and a doctorate in counselling from Columbia Pacific University in California for his dissertation, Professional Love: The Hypnotic Power of Psychotherapy.His 46 years in private practice have taught him to appreciate the uniqueness of each individual, and how to strengthen the client's positive values.Dr. Knight is the author of numerous articles and several books, includingThe People Paradox;Enjoying Single Parenthood;Love, Sex & Hypnosis: Secrets of Psychotherapy;Health and Happiness with Hypnosis;and these ebooks:Hypnosis:Software for Your Mind;SELF-HYPNOSIS: Safe, Simple, Superb;How To Avoid A Bad Relationship;How To End Phobias, Anxiety & Panic Attacks;Easily Hypnotize Anyone;Health and Happiness with Hypnosis;How To Get Started As A Hypnotherapist;Hypnosis: 77 Answers to Questions I Wish You'd Stop AskingWeight Loss Success with Self-Help Hypnosis;Marketing Action Plan for Success in Private Practice;Creativity for Hypnotherapists.Money Fears -- Lose Them NOW.I Blame My Mother

Book preview

I Blame My Mother

How adults overcome the childhood verbal, physical or

sexual harm caused by their abusive mothers

by

Bryan M. Knight, MSW, PhD.

Edited by

Lisa J. Knight

copyright 2013 Bryan M. Knight, MSW, PhD.

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author

Table of Contents

Introduction – what this book is about, what it’s not …

I should have flushed you down the toilet

Why does a mother hurt her kids?

Signs in an adult of having been sexually abused as a child

Role of religion

Solutions for Survivors

What to do if you’re a mother who recognizes her cruelty?

How do we prevent childhood abuse?

About the author – Bryan M. Knight, MSW., PhD.

References

Further reading

Introduction – what this book is about, what it’s not...

Apart from the headline-grabbing news of children having been murdered by their mothers, women are generally considered to be nurturers, not abusers. But mothers abuse their children in alarming numbers. 3 million cases of child abuse (6 million children) are reported to child protection services in the U.S. each year – Over 40% of abusers are mothers, either alone or with another adult.

This abuse, while not as dramatic as drowning, poisoning or stabbing, is nevertheless life-shattering for the betrayed children. Mothers are more likely than fathers to get away with verbal, physical or sexual abuse of their offspring because:

they have more opportunity (usually being the main caregiver)

society assigns them a nurturing, wholesome role

we are reluctant to accept that mothers can be cruel to their own children.

When I requested contributions from fellow therapists for this book at least 3 out of 10 asked why not fathers? [as abusers] and some even sent stories of male perpetrators rather than mothers.

When I mention that I was sexually abused, people automatically assume it was by a man. Such is the bias that abusers are mostly men.

But this book is focused on the