Koalaland or The Great Koala Novel, Volume V: The Dreaded Plague

By David Bolton

The Grim Reaper is back for more!

As we have witnessed, the intrepid koalas have successfully dealt with the terrible challenge of defending themselves against the evil hyenas.

After burying their dead, and mourning their great losses, they now desire nothing more fervently than to return to the noble task of building their civilization in Southern Koalaland.

A new school system, and the introduction of their first monetary system, which they have wisely based on the gold standard, are two sure signs that koala society may soon be developing at a faster pace than anyone could ever have imagined!

On a more personal level, Maki Koala has found a new, and rather peculiar-looking friend, much to the surprise of many of her grovemates.

The general optimism, however, is cruelly crushed when the Council receives disquieting news from the northern groves: a plague of a most deadly disease has broken out in Noble Grove, and threatens to spread throughout all of Koalaland.

How should our furry friends confront this horrendous menace? Could this indeed be the beginning of the end of intelligent koala civilization as we know it?

Brace yourself for the worst, as you pray for deliverance ‒ for you are now entering Volume V of Koalaland: “The Dreaded Plague”.

• Language: English
• Publisher: David Bolton
• Release date: May 21, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301206605

David Bolton

David Bolton worked in a broad variety of occupations before settling into a career as a lecturer on English as a foreign language. He has written a number of textbooks for foreign students, published around the world, as well as a local history book on Bristol, where he lives.

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Copyright © 2013 by David Bolton

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Koalaland

or

The Great Koala Novel

Volume V: The Dreaded Plague

by

David Bolton

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PUBLISHED BY:

David Bolton on Smashwords

Koalaland or The Great Koala Novel - Volume V: The Dreaded Plague

Copyright © 2013 by David Bolton. All rights reserved.

* * * * *

Smashwords Edition License Notes

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Dedication

To Maki, and everyone else who has become a raving fan of the koalas!

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Table of Contents

Cover – Title Page ‒ Dedication ‒ Table of Contents ‒

Map of Southern Koalaland –

Homeland Security - A most generous Human –

A Clue from beyond the Grave – First Lesson –

Scientific Inquiries – The unlikely Hero

Further Research – A musical Acquaintance

A shady Proposal - Multiple Postponements

A controversial Request – A most peculiar Encounter

A Book is a real Treasure - The Lizard's new Clothes

Gold for (almost) Everyone – Grim Determination

Solemn Journey – King Koala – Crucial Preparations

Noble Grove – A precocious Youngster

A good Reason to Worry - Grammatical Concerns

Grammatical Concerns - Koala Theology

A friendly Visit - News from the North

A Matter of Perspective –

Bumpy’s Parakeet, and other Gifts

Triumphal Homecoming – The Deeper Meaning

The Deeper Meaning – Nascent Love – First Contact

An important Message from His Majesty, the Prestigious Koala King

Author’s Bio

Map of Southern Koalaland

Homeland Security

The day following the funeral, intense discussions began in Eucalyptus Grove, and also in Koalatown. The leaders of both groves had already seen to it that the western borders were protected, but now, they knew that they would have to face the issue of how to set up a system of civil defense that would assure the security of Southern Koalaland on all fronts. After all, the attack of the hyenas had exposed a frightening vulnerability. In the future, there might be other predators who could easily get the upper hand, if precautions were not taken. Mayor Koala and Judge Rolly were on the platform of the Mayoral Tree, discussing this very subject, when a messenger koala brought them a letter from Eucalyptus Grove.

I’m no psychic, Mayor, but I’ll bet you any money that this letter is about grove defense, Rolly said as he took the letter from the messenger, who then climbed back down the tree. Sure enough, I see it was sent by your cousin himself.

Sticky never was the type to waste time, Mayor Koala replied as Rolly handed him the letter from the Prestigious Koala King. He opened it and read aloud:

‘Dear Mayor Koala, The Council and I would like to invite you and Judge Rolly to visit us as soon as is convenient for you, so that we may jointly discuss the defense of our beloved Koalaland, and devise the means to reliably protect our citizens from incursions such as the one that we have so recently witnessed. Should your Chief Duffy be able to put aside his other obligations long enough to accompany you, we would surely be quite pleased, for from what we have heard, he did an excellent job in repelling the invaders, and would no doubt have much to contribute as far as a joint civil defense plan is concerned. We will be looking forward to hearing from you. Yours Most Truly, Prestigious Koala King.’

See, I told you, Rolly said. But why do we always have to go over there? Couldn’t they come over here for a change?

Under different circumstances, I might agree with you, the Mayor responded, "but considering the fact that if the hyenas attack again, they will doubtlessly come from the west, I have no problem with going a bit farther east for a day, do you?"

Good point. How about tomorrow? Rolly asked. We could go over about noon, and spend all afternoon discussing the matter with them. Duffy can accompany our wagon, riding his emu, and we can take along a few extra guards, just in case.

Let’s hope we won’t need them, the Mayor replied. I suppose it is important that we go. A good civil defense system would be the best guarantee for preventing future tragedies, and I’m sure that if we all put our minds together, we will come up with a whole bunch of good ideas.

It’s settled, then. Tomorrow we go. I’ll inform Duffy on the way back to my tree, Rolly said.

But Rolly, aren’t you going to stay till evening, as you usually do? the Mayor seemed surprised. We could get in a round of cards or two. We haven’t played since before the attack.

I know, but if it’s just the same to you, Mayor, I’d like to spend the evening alone. Maybe I will draw up a basic civil defense plan myself. Aren’t you going over to see Milly, anyway? Rolly inquired.

Yes, but not till later. She and her parents were going to visit some relatives this afternoon, and they won’t be home till about eight, the Mayor answered. Rolly, that funeral yesterday was one depressing affair, he added, suddenly looking very sad. Do you know what the worst thing about a funeral is?

Knowing that someday, it’ll be our turn to be buried? Rolly speculated.

You hit the nail right on its hideous head, the Mayor answered. Nothing like a funeral to remind us of our own mortality. The deceased are lucky, in a way. They’ve crossed through the gates of death already, and no longer have to fear it.

Hey, Mayor, cheer up a bit. We’re still alive! And you’ve got a lot to look forward to. Getting married to Milly, raising a family... You’ll be around for a long time yet, I predict. Weeds are pretty hard to kill, you know! Rolly tried to lighten his friend’s mood.

As a matter of fact, I’m planning to live to the ripe old age of one hundred and three, the Mayor replied, only half humorously, but still, that attack two days ago really makes you put things in perspective, you know what I mean?

Yeah, it sure does, Rolly agreed soberly. Here today, gone tomorrow. Live life while you can. Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow...

Yeah, yeah, I get your point. And as soon as we get Southern Koalaland secured, I think I might just heed that advice, the Mayor said. Maybe you and I spend a bit too much time playing cards. Perhaps we should go out, mingle with the citizens, make new friends, give some candy to koala children, even when there isn’t an election coming up.

Wow, I never thought I’d see the day when you’d talk like that! Rolly was surprised. I guess our recent tragedy has had a more profound effect on you than I realized. The truth is, I agree with you. Life is so short, and so precious. Yet first things first. Let’s see to it that the meeting tomorrow bears fruit, and that we come up with a good defense plan. I, for one, don’t want to be eaten alive. It must be a horrible way to die.

Can you think of a pleasant way? the Mayor asked. Rolly could think of none, and simply shook his head.

The Mayor wrote a note to the King, informing him that he and his colleagues would arrive at the Royal Arboreal Complex at noon the following day. He then had Swinky mail it to Eucalyptus Grove by carrier pigeon.

***

The next day, the monarch and his Council were all assembled when Mayor Koala, Rolly, and their Police Chief got there. The King greeted the three koalas personally, and led them to the seats that had been placed at the table for them.

Councilmembers, I give you Mayor Koala, Judge Rolly, and Police Chief Duffy, the King announced. Please, gentlekoalas, sit down.

The three visitors took their seats. The King returned to his chair at the other end of the long table, and began to speak:

My friends, you all know why we are meeting here today. Recent events have shown that we were astonishingly ill-prepared for the attack that cost so many of our citizens their lives, and I’m sure we all agree that it must not happen again. Only a carefully crafted civil defense plan can guarantee our safety. Mistakes have been made in the past. We were admittedly negligent, as far as defense was concerned.

Excuse me for interrupting you, Sire, Tecky spoke up.

Yes, please, what is it you would like to say? the King asked.

We could all no doubt spend the day, and perhaps even several days, blaming ourselves for not being prepared, Tecky said, yet I feel that it would be far more constructive to mention past mistakes only within the context of what measures we are going to take to correct them. Pointing fingers will not ward off dangers; only positive action will.

I agree with Tecky, Sire, Judge Rolly added. True, we leaders could have shown much more foresight in the past, yet the fact is, for whatever reasons, we did not do so. Nevertheless, now is the time to plan, not to lament bygone errors.

All at the table agreed with Tecky and Rolly, and it was decided that the meeting would be dedicated solely to the presentation of any ideas that those gathered may have to formulate a sound civil defense plan. They would leave it to the historians to look back and decide who, if anybody, was guilty of not having done enough to protect the groves from attack. Old Chashibu then gave a summary of his theory that the attack had in actuality been carefully planned by the invaders, and was by no means spontaneous.

Chief Duffy, we would be most interested in hearing from you, the King addressed the visitor. After all, you were responsible for organizing the defense in Koalatown. Have you any thoughts on this? Or any suggestions as to a possible civil defense system?

Sire, I am honored that you ask my opinion. I would in fact like to present some ideas, for what they are worth, the brawny, red-furred, freckled-faced koala began. I believe that Chashibu is quite correct in assuming that there was a devious plan behind the attack. I myself thought the same thing once everything was over, and I had time to ponder. It can be no coincidence that those beasts attacked in such a way as to achieve a maximum of effect.

Yes, Chashibu has convinced us all that his theory is correct, Handy said. Of course, this makes it all the more difficult to plan our defense in the future, for if those monsters really do have more than just a smidgeon of intelligence, they could theoretically find ways of foiling even our best-laid defense plans.

A terrifying thought, Granddaddy commented, clever hyenas! Yet nonetheless, we are koalas, and are far more intelligent than they are, no matter how smart they may be. Duffy, what would you suggest we do?

First of all, Judge, we must make sure that weapons are more easily available, for all koalas, should the need to use them arise, Duffy replied.

Here, here! That is exactly what I believe! Chosay agreed.

After several koalas spoke on the subject, it was decided that special large boxes would be placed at strategic locations in the grove. They would contain bows, arrows, knives, slingshots, and ammunition. Racks would be placed behind the boxes, in which long spears would be propped. In case of an attack, koalas in each section of the two groves could rush down their trees and grab the weapons they needed.

So far, so good, Handy opined, yet wouldn’t it be better for many koalas to already have the bows and arrows in their trees? After all, descending your tree when the hyenas are running around would seem to be the greatest folly.

I was thinking the same thing, Kashy said. The boxes can contain extra bows and arrows, to be sure, but every koala and family should have some weapons right up in their trees. The spears can remain below, as well as extra arrows and other ammunition.

I’m starting to have my doubts, I’m afraid, Claire looked a bit worried. Are you seriously suggesting that there be weapons in every tree? What about the children? They could easily get their hands on them, and hurt themselves, or others. As a matter of fact, with so many weapons around, even adults could have accidents at times. No, I don’t like that plan at all.

Hmm, you may have a point, madam, Mayor Koala said to Claire, especially where my grove is concerned. It is certainly no secret that many of our citizens have a weakness for the bottle, so to speak, and the idea of so many drunks having dangerous weapons within reach makes my fur stand on end. Your Majesty, what is your opinion?

Well, our more military-minded koalas understandably see ubiquitous weaponry as the most practical solution, and the fact is, if all the koalas had had weapons in their trees the other day, our losses would certainly not have been as great, the King expounded.

Right, Sire. We could have chased them away in a much shorter time, Handy said.

Yet on the other hand, the attack was an exceptional event, the King went on. If weapons were in the hands of our citizens on a daily basis, there is little doubt but that, as Claire and the Mayor said, we would have to deal with accidents, or even drunken acts of violence, on a regular basis. Not a very desirable scenario, is it?

No, of course not, Sire, Kashy replied, yet there is something else we must take into account, a factor whose importance perhaps exceeds that of the possibility of accidents, or occasional acts of malicious violence. And that is the right of every koala to self-defense. The disaster that came upon us two days ago is ample proof that our policekoalas are unable to offer total protection to all of the citizens. Therefore, koalas must be allowed to defend themselves, and how in the world could they ever do so against savage, vicious beasts unless they possess weapons that are adequate for the task? If there had been bows and arrows in every inhabited tree the other day, there is little doubt but that those hyenas would have been put to flight considerably sooner than they in fact were, and lives would have been saved. Have we, the Council, the right to deny our citizens the means they need to save their own lives, and those of their loved ones? No, I say! Quite the contrary, we should encourage them all to acquire the weapons of their choice, and to practice using them, so that they will be extremely well-prepared should further attacks ever occur.

All well said, my dear colleague, lawyer Gruffy responded, "but I must beg to differ. You would seem to want all of us to live in constant fear, to sleep with weapons right on the branch next to us. Yet as Claire and His Majesty have already said, this would almost doubtlessly lead to accidents, and might even encourage certain citizens of ours to use those weapons not only in self-defense, but maybe even against one another. The occasional brawls of today would then be the shootouts of tomorrow, with the more unruly koalas among us using their bows and arrows to attack each other, or perhaps even to threaten lawful citizens, for the purpose of robbing them, for example. No, I say. The hyena invasion, terrible as it was, was exceptional. We had not been the victims of such an onslaught for years, and now that we have secured the western borders of both groves, it is highly unlikely that they could ever launch such a successful attack again anytime soon. It would be a mistake for us to become the victims of our own fear, and to arm everyone. Suppose a koala child finds his father’s bow, gets an arrow as well, and manages to fire the arrow, just for fun, and ends up injuring, or even killing someone? Would you yourself not then feel guilty for having insisted that that bow and arrow be in the family tree? In fact, would you not, at least in part, be guilty, an unwitting accomplice to the tragedy? No, no, there must be a better solution!"

At no time have I said that we must force koalas to have weapons, Kashy defended his position. I merely said that we should encourage them. If a family does not wish to possess them, fine; we would not insist. But those who desire to own them should be allowed to do so. As a matter of fact, at present there is no law forbidding possession of weapons, as you all, and especially you, Gruffy, should know. Some koalas already have bows and arrows in their trees, and a much greater number have slingshots. Therefore, what I am saying is nothing out of the ordinary, and it certainly does not violate any article in the new Eucalyptus Grove Book of Laws. Thus, all I am advocating is that the possession of weapons should be encouraged, so that as many koalas as possible own them, and can participate in the defense of our grove when it is necessary.

I would like to hear the opinions of our distinguished visitors from Koalatown on this matter, the Prestigious Koala King interrupted their debate. Judge Rolly, what do the laws in Koalatown stipulate concerning the possession of weapons?

Well Sire, at present there are no laws against owning weapons, yet we have been careful not to encourage possession. True, we have our arsenal, and the other day, we passed out many bows and arrows, spears and swords. Yet the idea of all koalas having such instruments of death in their trees makes me shudder, for as you all know, we have more than our fair share of ruffians, as well as drunkards. Duffy, why don’t you put in your two cents’ worth?

Of course, Judge. The truth is, my deputies and I have our hands full keeping order in certain parts of Koalatown, the southwestern section in particular, that the dregs of our society call home. There are koalas there who would throw a rock at you, or punch you in the nose, as soon as look at you. True, they generally only do such things when intoxicated, but the problem is, they are plastered every chance they get. When they get uppity, we law enforcement officers generally teach them a little lesson with our sticks... ouch! At this point, Duffy felt somebody kick his leg under the table; it was Mayor Koala, who did not want the leaders of the neighboring grove to know about the somewhat rough-and-ready police methods that were approved of in Koalatown. Oh, I think a bug bit my leg, it really hurt there for a second, Duffy made up an excuse. As I was saying, if the delinquents had weapons, they might end up chasing us away, or even killing us. No, I say. Weapons are necessary in times of crisis, and as we speak here, there are several hundred koalas-at-arms securing our southwestern border. Yet deputies Mabo and Doefoo are there to maintain order, and besides, since just after the attack, our wise leaders here decreed that there would be a temporary ban on drinking, so that all would be able to concentrate on establishing an orderly line of defense.

Clearly, gentlekoalas – oh, and Claire, too – we must find a better solution for this problem, Judge Granddaddy spoke up. Both Kashy as well as Gruffy have good arguments to support their opposing views, yet I for one – and I don’t think I’m alone in my opinion – feel that neither solution is adequate. A grove full of perpetually armed koalas is somewhat frightening, yet the other day showed us that the lack of weapons when they are truly needed is also a horrendous situation.

If we vote on this issue, I would be against the general arming of the population, Doctor Koala said. You all know that I myself lost a dear one the other day, and it was a loss that I may never totally get over, he continued, expressing himself with an emotional candor that was rare for him, yet I am a doctor, and the thought that some of our citizens, even children, could be hurt in accidents with weapons is unbearable. The Koala Sun knows that there are enough ways for koalas to get into accidents, even without weapons. Why, almost every day I have to treat somebody who slipped and fell out of his tree, or sprained an ankle, or some young koala who teased an emu and got pecked in the head for it. No, we don’t need weapons in every tree. It would be courting disaster.

Accidents would happen, Handy said, yet if we made every koala who owns weapons take a little course in safety, they could be reduced to a minimum. For example, we could teach parents how to store their bows and arrows separately, and in safe places, so that children couldn’t get their hands on them.

Easily said, Claire responded, but koala children are clever, and they are attracted to anything that adults forbid them to do. No matter how safely weapons were stored, some children would find ways to get hold of them, that’s for sure.

My friends, I fear we are going around in circles, Tecky spoke up. "Obviously, there are excellent reasons both for the general arming of our citizens, as well as against it. Perhaps we should not polarize ourselves on this one question, but rather, ask another: is there any other way we could make the grove safer, without going to extremes?"

An excellent question, old Chashibu smiled, and I think you are right. I believe there is another way to deal with this, and if I may be permitted to do so, I would like to offer some ideas on what this way might be.

Please, do break the stalemate, the King encouraged Chashibu to go on.

Well, the way I see it, the aged koala continued, what we all wish to achieve is a maximum of security, without going to extremes that might endanger our citizens. Correct?

All nodded their furry heads in agreement; thereupon, the elder proceeded with his suggestion.

It would seem to me that our small police force is plainly inadequate, on the one hand, yet on the other, to have all koalas perpetually armed is the other extreme. And the middle path? What could that be? Well, I believe it lies in the formation of a military force, one that is well-trained, and can be called to action at a moment’s notice. These koalas, who could inhabit trees in various parts of the grove, would be those who have weapons in their trees, not only for themselves, but also extra ones that they would distribute to other citizens if an emergency arises. That way, no children would be in danger, yet all parts of the groves would have a certain degree of protection. As of now, there are koalas who practice archery as a hobby, but the special training given to a greater number would enable more koalas to use the weapons more effectively, so we would have a higher percentage of citizens who are superior archers, for example.

Hmm, there is indeed merit in what you propose, Chashibu, Mayor Koala was the first to respond after a rather lengthy pause. A trained, organized force of koalas, a sort of militia, one might say. Koalas who learn discipline, who are responsible for their weapons - I like the idea.

It certainly has its appeal, Judge Rolly added, yet there is one thing we must consider. Couldn’t such an armed force be turned against us, the leaders? I mean, there are times when the citizens aren’t very content for some reason or another. Perhaps, for example, they want the grove to organize more parties, and we don’t do it. Certain opportunists might then round up the armed koalas, and convince them to join a revolt.

My, that is a rather unusual fear, in my view, the King responded. From what I’ve heard, you and the Mayor are quite popular over in Koalatown, yet if the koalas were not satisfied with your rule, they could always choose somebody else at the next election.

Yes, quite true. But I was also thinking of your situation, Your Highness. You have no elections in Eucalyptus Grove. Suppose your koalas revolted?

I don’t think we need fear that, the King replied. If I ever see that a large part of our population no longer wishes me to rule, I shall abdicate, and retire to private life.

I don’t think that will ever happen, Your Majesty, Tecky said. You are the most respected koala among us, and all our citizens love you.

That is very humbling, the King responded, and I shall always try to make myself worthy of that love!

Mayor Koala could