Beware Of The Vet

By Vadim Chelom

The sequel to the smash hit 'Vet Bites Dog', 'Beware Of The Vet' continues the hilarious story of a young Veterinarian working at an animal shelter. This is a funny and honest account of what they don't teach you in Vet School.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Vadim Chelom
• Release date: Sep 2, 2012
• ISBN: 9781476380612

Vadim Chelom

Doctor Vadim Chelom is a Veterinarian, a writer and an educator. He has worked at RSPCA, an Animal Emergency Centre and a holistic Veterinary clinic. Dr Vadim was also featured in the TV show 'RSPCA Animal Rescue'.

Book preview

Beware Of The Vet

Dr Vadim Chelom

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2012 Vadim Chelom

The sequel to the smash hit Vet Bites Dog

Dear Reader:

All the characters in this book are fictional. Yes, you heard that right. Just because you know me, have worked with me at an Animal Shelter and have found a character in this book that looks and acts exactly like you doesn't mean hat this character is based on you. So don't go suing me for part of my royalties.

Even if you do, don't expect to get anything because as the title suggests, I am only a Veterinarian. And as everybody knows, veterinarians are the highest educated, lowest paid professionals in the Western world.

So why don't you save yourself time and money and just enjoy the book. It will be netter for both of us.

Copyright Notice:

Dear Reader,

Please don't pirate this book. If you choose to copy and distribute this book without permission in any form - digital and otherwise, then in addition to breaking countless national and international copyright laws you will also be earning bad karma. And you don't want to know what bad things that will do to you.

Don't just read the book - join the conversation.

Take a look at my blog - you wouldn't regret it:

http://www.doctor-pets.com

I am also on Facebook and Twitter.

Chapter 1

‘How do I export history notes into another file?’

‘Press F10.’

‘You said that last time.’

‘Yes, I did. Now press it again.’

‘This is ridiculous. I pressed F10 five times already.’

‘Only five times? Press it about eight times more and it will work.’

It was my lunch hour. Well, it was supposed to be my lunch hour but I have already spent close to 40 minutes trying to update history notes. This operation should have taken five minutes at most if not for Bird Wood's insanely crazy computer system.

Sitting in the staff room surrounded by a pile of papers I desperately tried to collate a disjointed mess of medical babble into a coherent history narrative informative enough to be shown without embarrassment to specialists and work colleagues. A pot of instant noodles, so flavoursome and inviting twenty minutes ago was growing cold on the table. Behind me, seated comfortably in an arm chair with his feet on the table, Allan was half-way through his newspaper crossword.

‘What's an opera by Bizet, six letters, third letter ‘R’?’

‘Boring.’

‘Really? Hey I was serious!’

‘I am serious too. Seriously thinking about smashing this computer with a brick.’

The shelter was computerized sometime around 1985. Once the computers were installed no one seemed to care much for the way they worked and the idea of employing a professional computer technician seemed an unjustifiable luxury. Consequently not a cent not spent on upgrading or updating the network. The result was a computer system so ancient, antiquated and impossible to use that when an IT technician was eventually called out, he spend twenty minutes examining the network, then made a feeble excuse and ran off never to be seen again. So an IT upgrade was promptly added to the shelter’s wish list but since the wish list already contained such items as fixing a leaking roof in reception area and replacing the rusty septic tank, the computer system never got the attention it urgently needed.

Of all the Shelter employees Allan was the person most in tune with the computer’s unexplainable idiosyncrasies. Most of the time the solution requited the user to press the F10 button multiple times until the desired operation would be magically, inexplicably executed.

‘And then when the cursor stops blinking press F10. And