Limo Run LA Chauffeur Memoirs

By Mark Keshel

This book will have you laughing; it will shock you, and keep you on the edge of your
seat. All the stories are true; some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty. The length of the ebook is just about 40,000 words.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mark Keshel
• Release date: Nov 25, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465888792

Mark Keshel

I am Mark Keshel the Author of ‘LIMO RUN LA Chauffeur Memoirs.” The reason I wrote this book is because I wanted to tell this great life story of the limousine business. The second reason was because of encouragement from friends and acquaintances. I would go to gatherings or functions and would be mingling and talking with people and of course they would ask me what do you do for a living, I would tell them I am a Chauffeur. Of course they would ask do you have any good stories about people that you’ve driven, I would tell them a story or two and every time their response would be “my god you should write a book”. After hearing this many many times from numerous people I decided to do just that. ENJOY!!! PS. I have changed some of the names to protect the guilty !!!

Book preview

LIMO RUN LA

Chauffeur Memoirs

Written by Mark Keshel

Acknowledgements

First and foremost I would like to thank Elizabeth my girlfriend and best friend for all the support she gives me in whatever endeavor I embark upon

I would like to also thank my many friends their ideas and suggestions are what inspired me to write this book.

I would like to acknowledge my friend Nora Shea, she helped me immensely thank you so much.

Last but not least I want to thank my family for all the love, faith, and confidence they've given on this long and challenging road.

LIMO RUN LA Chauffeur Memoirs

Published by Mark Keshel at Smashwords

Copyright 2011-Mark Keshel

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

THE START

THE OFFICE

THE CONSTRUCTION MANAGER

THE REAL-ESTATE AGENT

THE COMMERCIAL REAL-ESTATE BROKER

THE MORTAGE BROKER

THE MUSICAN

THE HUMMER RUN

THE KING

THE EMMY AWARDS

REALITY TV

SPORTS STARS

BILLIONAIRES

THE PRINCE

THE FINISH

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THE START

The year 2006 and the US was at war in the Middle East. It all started when I lost my position as Vice President and Operations Manager of a small company. The owner and I were good friends but I hadn’t seen a paycheck in some time. He came to me one day and said, Maybe you should look for another job. It was really no surprise, I mean I saw the orders coming in or should I say lack of them. Really, in my opinion, this guy couldn’t sell ice to people living on the equator. He would be on the phone with someone for over an hour and the only thing he would get was the person’s address so I could send them some free product.

So the search began. I pondered where a 43-year-old white male with only a high school education would find a job in Southern California? I picked up the penny saver (a classified ad magazine) as I was having my tea one morning. There I found an ad, Driver Wanted and put a big circle around it. It took me a couple days of deliberating. Do I want to be a driver; I mean really, have you seen the roads and highways around the Southern California area? GRID LOCK!! There would have to be something seriously wrong with anyone that wanted to be a driver around here. A few days went by and I decided to call the number in the ad and a woman with a Scottish accent answered the phone. Hello ZQX Limousine. May speaking, how may I assist you?

She had a really pleasant voice. I saw your ad in the penny saver for a driver, what does the job consist of?

Well it’s a chauffeur position, we are a limousine company. Are you still interested in the job?

I paused slightly, yes.

Good be here tomorrow at 9:00 am sharp for an interview.

OK. I hung up the phone and rushed to the closet, where I found my only suit. It was a two-piece all black suit that I had bought earlier that year for an executive protection gig I did for NBB. Perfect, I thought; I brushed it off, tried it on, it still fit great. With a white shirt, black tie, black shoes I was ready.

The next morning I arrived at the interview five minutes early. I didn’t want to seem to anxious, and I wanted to play it cool. I walked into the lobby of the building where I was told to go the day before, the place was deserted, nobody around. There were a couple of nice chairs, a table with some magazines on it, a lamp in the corner, one door and a set of stairs leading up to the second floor. I could see there were no lights on up on the second floor so I knocked on the only door there. No one answer, so I knocked hard, still no answer, I walked through the door looking for a sign that someone was around. It was a warehouse with a bunch of the limos parked in it end to end the long way. It could only fit two side by side but it could fit three end to end. I saw black stretch Lincolns, a black stretch H2 Hummer and black Lincoln sedans, a silver S500 Mercedes and a black S550 Mercedes. The bay door was open and outside I saw a white mini coach and a white Sprinter van. At the end opposite of the big door I saw a few desks. I couldn’t really see over the hummer stretch, so I walked to that end of the warehouse. The whole end of the warehouse was decorated with beautiful furniture. There were two grandiose wooden desks, a magnificent over sized leather sofa and ottoman in front of a huge dark wooden mahogany wall unit that held a fifty-inch flat screen TV.

I saw a large girl sitting behind one of the desks talking on the phone. I could tell by her Scottish accent it was the girl I met the previous day on the phone. She didn’t look anything like I had imagined. She was in her middle forties, and looked like she’d lived a tough life. When she hung up the phone I told her I was the guy that called yesterday and that I was there for my interview. In her Scottish accent she said, Go wait in the lobby, somebody will be with you in just a few minutes. I turned and walked past all those big long cars stopping and peeking in one of the Lincoln stretches on my way back to the lobby. I thought; it was beautiful inside.

I sat down in the lobby and picked up a magazine and waited. My mind was racing thinking about what the hell I was about to get into. I was there for about fifteen minutes when a man of around forty, dressed very hip, walked in and introduced himself as Armani the owner of the company. Armani was a tall middle-eastern man with slicked back shoulder length dark hair dark eyes and a bright smile. All in all he was a refined looking man. He was very polite and invited me to sit. He proceeded to ask a few questions like, Do you have a clean driving record?

Of course.

Are you a drug user?

Certainly NOT!

Have you ever driven for a limo company before?

No.

Well you’re certainly dressed like a Chauffeur. I smiled and thought to myself; this is my only suit I’m glad it was the right color. He said, I pay fifteen dollars an hour to start and you get to keep any tips.

OK. That was it. The interview lasted all of about three minutes. He got up started walking towards the door and said, you’re hired, be here tomorrow at 7 am I’ll explain what I want you to do then.

On my way home I stopped at a store and picked up a bottle of wine. I needed to celebrate my new career! When I arrived at home I told my girlfriend about my interview and that we should drink to the occasion. So when dinner was ready we opened the bottle of Pinot Nior and toasted to my new career as a chauffeur.

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THE OFFICE

The next morning I arrived at the office a few minutes before seven, and walked into the lobby. I tried to walk through the door to the warehouse but it was locked. Great; I thought, so I knocked on the door, there was no answer. I literally banged on the door with the side of my fist, still no answer. I called the phone number I had. The Scottish girl answered, I told her I was in the lobby but the door was locked. She told me to go around the building and come in the side door into the warehouse. There I found May at one desk and Armani at the other, both of them were on the telephone. I waited about ten minutes until Armani hung up the phone and looked at me and said, You’re here, with an almost questioning tone in his voice.

You told me to be here at seven, did I miss understand you?

No no, here you go, he handed me two papers These are your pickups for the day, if you can handle them I will have more work for you tomorrow.

OK, but I have never done this before, I have a few questions.

He looked at me, Its not rocket science; Go to the first address, pickup the people, take them to the destination location, drop them off, and go on to the next pickup. Call me when you pick the people up and when you drop them off, any questions?

No.

Good, you better get going your pickup is in 45 minutes and I want you there 15 minutes early, oh and by the way you have to stop and get gas, and here is the map-quest directions to your pickups.

Well, I need some money for gas.

Here is a gas card; stop at Costco, this card will only work there.

OK and away I went.

As I was driving to Costco I looked at the address and thought; my god this place is at least 30 minutes away I wish he had told me to come a little earlier so I didn’t have to rush. When I arrived at Costco every gas pump line was at least four to five cars deep, I got in line and called Armani and said, Hey buddy the gas lines are four and five deep it’s going to be quite difficult to get to the first pickup on time. Why didn’t you tell me to come a little earlier?

Do your best if you’re late just tell the people you got lost and that you’re sorry.

WHAT, why does it have to be my fault?

Don’t worry about it, just do your best.

I hung up the phone and did just that. I arrived right at the pickup time of eight o’clock. I thought whew just made it right on time. I called Armani and told him that I was at the pickup location and he said, "Good job, go and knock on the door and introduce your self.

I went and knocked on the door, an older man in his late sixties answered I introduced myself, Hi I am Mark from ZQX Limousines. Do you have any luggage I could help with?

Yes, my name is Jim and this is my wife Nancy we are all ready to go-our bags are right there. I picked up the two medium size suitcases and walked out to the car put them into the trunk and waited about two minutes, they both came out, I greeted them with a big smile and opened the door, they got into the car and away we went. They were going to LAX airport in Los Angeles about a one-hour drive from their house in southern Orange County. They told me they were flying to Hawaii on vacation and that they would be back in about one week. I said, WOW that sounds like a lot of fun I hope you have a great time.

"We don’t have anything planned but rest and relaxation.

Sounds like the perfect vacation to me. After a bit more small talk we arrived at LAX. I took them to the Hawaiian Airlines terminal