Hold Me Under

Written by Riley Nash

Narrated by JF Harding and Stephen Dexter

 Love is cheap. Love is cruel. Love can’t save us.

Victor Lang had everything—looks, money, fame. A chance to become the greatest swimmer in history. Until a failed dope test brought him crashing down.

According to the rumors, he turned into a recluse, a drug addict, a whore. Broken beyond repair. Incapable of love.

And for some reason, he’s set his sights on me.

A freak accident in his pool throws me into a world of wealth and status and people who are willing to do anything to get what they want. Before I know it, I’m being paid to fly to Italy and pose as his boyfriend. Trapped at his side, I learn what it means to truly hate someone.

Turns out, that’s exactly what he wants.

I can’t save him, and I can’t love him. But as things fall apart and I discover the truths he’s hiding, I learn that hate can be greater than love—an obsession, a prayer, dark days and darker nights, a need to be the only one who hurts him. Hate can heal the worst wounds love leaves behind.

But I have problems of my own, a broken spirit and loved ones to protect. And I’m scared to face the things he’s waking up inside of me.

A gritty, emotional, epic hate-to-love slow burn with an inexperienced top and his bratty bottom, hurt/comfort, obsession, and healing.

**Contains dark themes, adult content, and potential triggers, including (potential spoilers): sexual abuse (off the page), suicidal ideation, drug abuse, disordered eating, trauma, death, mental illness, homophobic language

• Language: English
• Publisher: Riley Nash Books
• Release date: Jan 3, 2023
• ISBN: 9798868757969

Reviews for Hold Me Under

[trevorjcomer · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I binged it in 3 days!!! It was so gritty, so intense and just so angsty. I loved it!!!!

[Janina Jones · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Woah, this book was rough but holy heck I’m glad I made it through. Definitely take note of the CWs but know that the love story is worth it. Beautiful writing.

[Unathi Guma · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This was insane. The tension. The trauma behaviour which was unforgiving in context of how "HEA" books usually treat that aspect of behaviour (not the story).

It was tense and hard, but so so so beautiful. You might cry. You will feel tense and very angry.

The trigger warnings are not to be ignored.


The ending is HEA. But also... You might stare into space after.


Phew what a sonic ride.

[Susan Grunner · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Good book, great character development. They feel real and you can tell when they're struggling to understand each other. The writing style works for a mystery, Nash held the "secret" back very well. But the "payoff" was much smaller than I think it should have been, given how much the trauma has dominated Victor's life. Basically it was a huge buildup of angst, and it never felt fully balanced. I understand that the book didn't want to go too deep into the details of the trauma, but it should have been compensated with recovery. Similarly there wasn't enough relationship balance at the end, with Victor doing the caring. It was an afterthought, and could have used more attention.

Overall a fantastic book, but for how long we see the trauma, we didn't get enough resolution.

[yah teamah · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I find the entire series to be highly engaging. Each book effectively provides insightful backgrounds on the characters, which contributes significantly to maintaining reader interest throughout the narrative.

[mpsaltiesperia46 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Can't recommend this enough! Beautifully written, it was full of angst and trauma and a crazy love between the MMCs. I lapped this audio up in one go, couldn't wait to hear what happened next and didn't want it to end although at times it was difficult to listen to. There were some funny moments too. The narrators were exceptional. Can't wait to listen to the series.

[Sybil Milne · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

My heart has so so much love for Ethan and Victor. If you’ve come across this title and review, please don’t hesitate to give it a go— you won’t regret it.
Beautiful story telling with relatable emotions and some hard hitting topics that were handled well. I don’t know how I’ve not read this author before today but she’s now a one-click.
I don’t give out 5 stars easily and I never wavered on this from start to finish!
Great narration by Stephen Dexter and JF Harding too!
Story: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Narration: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[madisonbowhey · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Wowwwww. Sometimes on this app I find books that are worth the subscription and this is more than enough to justify all of the money I have spent here! Soooooo good. Also, very triggering at times but we persist, haha. I LOVE THIS BOOK!!!

[Ana Perez · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

OMG this is the best romance novel I’ve read this year! So well written. This novel is full of angst which I like so I don’t get bored. That being said, I got frustrated with Victor several times to the point that I wanted to stop listening, but everything was explained towards the end and it all made sense. Everything he says and does has a meaning and it’s not childish behavior like I thought. I listened to it in one day.I have to warn you, I found the revealing chapter towards the end very disturbing, but it all got better after that. I highly recommend it.

[Nicole Wilson · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I wanted to finish this. The narrators were wonderful but the MMC was so horrible that it was hard for me to sympathize or root for his redemption. I could understand that he was acting out or whatever but he still seemed unnecessarily cruel and hateful. I just could not enjoy the story.

[alanna.c.reid · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I am shell shocked and emotionally devastated. Excellent story, but be prepared to cling to that promise of a happy ending because it's like 90% dark forest.