How to F*ck a Woman: An Insider's Guide to Love and Relationships
Written by Ali Adler
Narrated by Justine Eyre
4/5
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About this audiobook
Brazen, uproarious, slyly prescriptive, and always entertaining, Ali Adler is a sex and relationship guru who knows what women want. As a lesbian, she has both the equipment and the experience to give straight men (and the women who love them) advice about how to get more sex and do it well.
In her day job as a comedy writer and TV producer, Ali is sometimes the only woman in a room full of fellow potty-mouthed comedy writers; in these bastions of bad sex jokes she became legendary for offering frank reality checks, and for translating female sexuality into words a man could understand. In her book How to F*ck a Woman—which turns out to be about 20 percent explicit instruction, 80 percent relationship advice, and 100 percent hilarious—she brings together essential advice for men (even the ones who insist they could write this book) and the women who want their lovers to truly understand them, both mind and body.
Ali Adler
Ali Adler is a T V writer and producer. Most recently she codeveloped Supergirl for television. She is the cocreator of The New Normal and has worked on various other shows, including Glee, Chuck, and Family Guy. The mother of two children, Ali lives in Los Angeles with fiancee Liz Brixius.
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Reviews for How to F*ck a Woman
67 ratings12 reviews
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Another book about relationships written by a woman that is as full of the same drivel as all the other relationship books written by women. The theme is always the same, men are Neanderthals incapable of any thoughts above a primeval level and women are these highly advanced creatures that are multitasking while juggling the thoughts for numerous other projects. Therefore men need to change everything about who they are just to please the woman. Then maybe there can be a healthy relationship. No word about how the woman can make an attempt to change. The only redeeming part of the book was the chapter on how to actually f**k a woman. You can get this information elsewhere without the condescension.
4 people found this helpful
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5While I'm sure this book actually has helped some men with their romantic lives, every piece of advice is based on stereotypical gender roles and the assumption that men literally only ever care about sex, and women are irrational mysterious beings who only ever want to talk about their feelings. I understand that it's written for men who are less than feminist, but I would have expected greater understanding of the nuance of gender and sexuality from a queer author.
4 people found this helpful
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Do the cis-hets find this helpful? Is this how it really is for y'all? Or do you find this book as reductive and condescending as I do? Ok, make an edgy generalization sometimes but did we need another whole book of it? The only use I see for this book is to get the red pill-ers through a couple months of masking and gaslighting, instead of one night. I'm a transman. I've lived as a woman and as a man. I don't live in the world that Ali Alder lives in and I'm terribly sorry if you do. If you find this book helpful, you might be too immature to date and you might need to speak with a therapist and/or life coach instead.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The best to the point education on interpersonal sexual relationships!
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I'm thinking about it right now and I think it's was just a great book !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Very insightful, as it should be. About women written by a woman.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Truth - All men and women should read this book. Excellent!
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Horrible book. If you are into body shaming, and like narcissists or if you lack intelligence go for it but this crock of dung is not worth reading for anyone else. I did notice the category was satire but it’s so bad it doesn’t even serve as that. Not worth your time, try something else.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Fantastic advice from a woman who knows what she’s talking about. One of the best!! - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It was a decent and honest read. She stereotypes men as empty-headed knuckle-draggers, but it was still entertaining.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Disclaimer: I received a free ARC from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
Ok. So. I don't need to know how to fuck a woman but I noticed that it was written by a lesbian so I was curious. I started flipping through the book & ending up reading it over the weekend.
It's crass, crude, & full of curse words...but...it's also humorous & contains some pretty solid advice that a lot of men need.
It's not just about how to fuck a woman. It contains advice on dating, wanting the woman you have, how to treat a woman & lots more.
One of the most useful sections is title "What Women Never Want to Hear". I found myself agreeing with most of it but my favorite was this little tidbit:
"Never say-I mean, never say any version of: "Relax/calm down/you're so emotional." "I can't understand you when you're like this." "You're too emotional." "What the hell are you crying about?" "Oh God. Stop crying. Stop it." "I can't listen to the crying." "I can't trust anything that comes out of your mouth four days a month." Any variation of this riff isn't good for you or your penis."
As a woman, this seems like common sense but it always shocks me how men just don't understand that telling us to calm down only makes us angrier. It shocks me even more that they don't learn that after the first couple of times they do it. I mean. Has a woman ever calmed down just because a guy said "Calm down. You're being too emotional."? I never have. My response is always the same "Shut up asshole. I have feelings. It would do you a world of good to take your feelings out of that box you keep them locked up in & acknowledge them on occasion."
Of course, this usually leads to the guy calling me a bitch...which should also be on the list of things to never say to a woman.
One of my favorite sections is titled "The Grown-up Version of the Gold Sticker" & contains a list of close to 50 things that a man can do for his woman that will improve his sexual status. It includes things like:
-Remember the kind of ice cream she loves both. Buy 2 pints. Eat neither.
-Clean out the fridge of all the disgusting, old, outdated, moldy things.
-On the off chance that you ever let her drive, keep your opinions to yourself.
The book should come with a laminated copy of this list to put on your fridge.
There's a chapter dedicated to how to correctly & kindly break up with women. I want to send a lot of men the pages in this chapter.
It does contain a chapter at the end just for women. It doesn't really contain anything we haven't heard before...don't be too picky but have standards, don't try to change your guy, don't assume he understands you, blah, blah, blah. This was my least favorite chapter.
The advice is solid enough that I passed the book on to my 19 yr old son...much to his embarrassment. ;-) - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Well, this book is really about the title on a lot of levels. The author informs us that as a lesbian she has the unique ability to see things from both the male and female perspective. The honest truth is that there is not only a lot of practical information about the title but also relationships in general bridging the gap between the genders. The principle theme is that women want to be listened to and understood but men see themselves as problem solvers always offering solutions. Women don't want solutions, they want a sympathetic ear. Also, men want immediate gratification and women want a slow build up across the board. (hunters and gathers). Good tips for both single and married men and women.