Now I Understand Why My Parents Were So Strict

When I was a child, I thought my parents were extremely unreasonable. In grade school, their strict rules kept me from going to classmates’ sleepovers, and any playdates I did have had to take place in our home. I attended a predominantly white Catholic school, and as one of the four black kids in my class, I already struggled to fit in. Being the weird kid who couldn’t go to anyone’s house didn’t help.

When I reached middle school, I watched my white friends receive more privileges with age, while my parents’ grip on me seemed to get tighter. When I’d ask my parents why I couldn’t stay over at so-and-so’s house or go to the mall with friends—without my dad coming and hanging out at the food court—the only answer I received was “You’ll understand when you’re older.”