Ep. 154 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Greg Fitzsimmons | 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer Podcast

Important Message To Fans | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 163: It's another episode of 2 Bears 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer! This week, the bears talk about scamming dentists and address fans that don't like hearing the bears talk about nice things. They also talk about how awesome the movie Belly is, how jacked Method Man is, work out competitions and confrontations they've had with people in public. They talk about scary flights they've been on, and Bert demands credit for bringing Aaron Rodgers into their circle of friends. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

65 min listen

Ep. 158 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer: It’s another week of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer and it is a WILD episode! Sober October is over and it’s Berty Boy’s birthday! The Bears discuss their favorite comics and throw shade at every comedian that’s slighted them, they discuss the tragic news about Takeoff from Migos, and then Tom reveals possibly the BEST birthday gift ever for Bert! The bears then discuss Diddy’s wild Halloween interaction with actor from the show Power, Michael J. Ferguson, as well as other scary dudes in hip hop. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

81 min listen

Ep. 157 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer: Happy Halloween! It's another week of 2 Bears 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer and it's the last day of #SoberOctober! They discuss how unbelievably cool comedian Dean Delray is, the bears' fashion choices, and lies they spread about each other. Bert discusses opening for Louis CK and nearly ruining the show, they talk about a heckler who threw a beer at a comedian on stage, and Bert shares a review from a fan posted on Instagram. They debate which famous family would be cool to be born into and Tom shares a story of someone getting kicked out of his show in Charlottesville. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

84 min listen

Ep. 138 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Ron White: Welcome back to 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Bert Kreischer is on dialysis and Tom Segura sits down with guest bear Ron White! The bears talk about how Ron used Ayahuasca to stop drinking, Ron getting arrested for drug smuggling, and the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. They trade standup comedy stories, discuss retirement, and some advice on love and happiness! by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

86 min listen

Ep. 162 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Yannis Pappas: This week, Tom Segura is joined by Yannis Pappas in Bert Kreischer’s place. They discuss how Yannis got talked into softening his water, how Tom feels about meeting fans, Chris Rocks current material, chartering jets vs. flying coach, weird ways people get aroused, the SNL writer who threatened to boycott the show over Dave Chappelle hosting, annoying politically correct terms, Kanye West, the Ukraine situation, the wildest conspiracy theories, Donald Trump, Herschel Walker, and more! by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

124 min listen

The Hottest Instagrams | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 165: It's another week of 2 Bears 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer! We start with Bert learning about numbers in other languages, they talk about countries they would run away to, and Bert really considers starting an Only Fans page. Tom then shows Bert a WILD loophole some Instagram models found and they look up the girlfriends of George Clooney, Chris Hemsworth, Henry Cavil. They talk about Nate Diaz and freak athletes like Barry Sanders and Charlie Ward. We call Bert's wife, LeeAnn, and ask her about vacations, boy shorts and selling nudes online. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

68 min listen

Ep. 160 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Quentin Tarantino: Bert Kreischer is still recovering from his heart surgeries so Tom Segura asked Quentin Tarantino to step in as a guest bear! Go check out Quentin’s new book “Cinema Speculation” and his podcast “The Video Archives!” Quentin discusses his new book, the journey of green lighting Pulp Fiction as well as the decisions made for casting. Tom asks Quentin about accents in Inglorious Bastards, Michael Parks in Kill Bill, and the “Top Gun is Gay” monologue. They discuss forced diversity casting in films, Quentin’s opinion on Alfred Hitchcock movies, and Quentin’s plan for his last film. Quentin talks about writing for TV, Tom reveals Quentin inspired him to film his own projects, Leonardo DiCaprio, and they share their thoughts on all the Marvel movies. They discuss stories about Don Rickles, Robert De Niro, and then Quentin roasts Tom. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

89 min listen

Jacked w/ Kumail Nanjiani | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 164: This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Bert Kreischer welcomes guest bear Kumail Nanjiani. They discuss Kevin Hart, writers rooms they've been on, and all the different scenes in standup. Kumail talks about growing up in Pakistan, starting in comedy, and being cool on film sets. Kumail talks about the Chicago comedy scene, Silicon Valley and Portlandia. They discuss acting, Saturday Night Live, Kumail getting JACKED, and Welcome to Chippendales on Hulu. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

100 min listen

Ep. 159 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Neal Brennan & Bert Kreischer: Neal Brennan joins Bert Kreischer in Tom Segura’s place for this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave. Neal and Bert discuss how much different comedians make, Neal’s Mark Twain speech, tour busses, SNL, representation in comedy, Chappelle’s Show, Trevor Noah, how they edit their stand-up specials, Neal’s new Netflix special “Blocks,” and much more! by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

128 min listen

Ep. 153 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Duncan Trussell: Duncan Trussell joins Tom Segura in Bert Kreischer’s place for this week’s “2 Bears, 1 Cave.” They discuss the new Armie Hammer documentary, Vlad the Impaler, North Korea, UFOs, Mos Def, Ted Bundy, and the Mari Aoki phenomenon. They also swap stories about “relieving themselves” on airplanes. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

86 min listen

Ep. 156 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer: It's another week of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer! They talk about Tiger Woods, their kids playing sports, and what it takes to become an elite athlete. They try to figure out how they can raise freak athletes, discuss sports families, and debate if 2 Bears Racing is going to participate in the great Gumball 3000. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

80 min listen

Ep. 152 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Joe Rogan: It's another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura and we have guest bear Joe Rogan! We talk about Joe beating Enny in arm wrestling right before cameras started rolling, how athletic Bert Kreischer actually is, and the parameters for Sober October this year. The bears talk about Mark Zuckerberg going on Joe Rogan Experience, failed attempts at canceling Joe, some wild videos on Instagram, and famous mobsters and hitmen. They review Evander Holyfield and Michael Jordan's unsellable homes, Francis Ngannou, and food based Instagram profiles. They talk about Sam's Tailor, the Fatty Arbuckle controversy, how unique Joey Diaz is, and how Joe and Tom met. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

108 min listen

Ep. 161 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer: Bert Kreischer finally recovered from all of his surgeries and joins Tom Segura to discuss their taste in adult videos. They discuss Adriana Chechik breaking her back, Bhad Bhabie, and if Bert should start an Only Fans account. Tom educates Bert on Tyga, Travis Scott and Woah Vicky. Bert shares his theory on little people, the bears discuss herpes, pregnancy scares, as well as hernias. They review some of the best hair transplants among celebrities, female celebrities that aged gracefully, and private jets. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

81 min listen

Drugs All Day | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 166: Happy new year and welcome back to 2 Bears 1 Cave with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer! They talk about surgeries, Tom translates Bert's plane conversation, and Kurt Cobain. The Jewish community reacts to Bert's Hitler cup, Bert shares a story about his wife, and the bears trade accidental smuggling stories. They describe their perfect day of drugs, discuss Bert's self awareness, and fitness. Bert then pitches Tom one of his best ideas: 2 Bears 1 Coach, where they interview coaches like Jimmy Johnson, Coach Prime and Phil Jackson. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

77 min listen

I Will Out Live You! | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 167: Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Tom and Bert share their wildest stories of visiting Europe, discuss why South Africa got mad at Bert, their feelings about money and success from comedy, what the most successful actors have in common and more! They wrap up by pondering how long Bert will live, which leads into a conversation about their fathers. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

72 min listen

Women Have It Good w/ Yannis Pappas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 183: Tom Segura is joined by guest bear Yannis Pappas on this week’s 2 Bears, 1 Cave. They discuss the old times, speeding, homelessness, exclusivity and wait for things, their experiences in therapy, and how Yannis is cheating on his therapists, and very cool guys Greg Hardy, Ray Rice, Woody Allen, and Bernie Madoff. Yannis also shares the story of how he got shot, and his experience recovering from it. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

83 min listen

North Korea Tourism w/ Duncan Trussell | Your Mom's House Ep. 698: Welcome back to the Mommy Dome with tom Segura and Christina P! Tom addresses the rumors about his DSL’s, the general behavior of dudes, Jamie Lee Curtis and where Nadav has been. The mommies review more of the worst tramp stamps the fans submitted and the new Netflix show “My Lover, My Killer.” We then welcome comedian and podcaster Duncan Trussell! They talk about their end of life plans, banging in MRI machines, and burping in space, and death ceremonies. The mommies show Duncan some horrible or hilarious clips, cool people promoting the Philippines and North Korea. Tom talks about meeting Jason Mamoa, we see a roommate from hell, how Duncan got into the Comedy Store, and a cool guy that gives tips to dudes on how to pick up women. by Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

86 min listen

The Machine Premiere | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 188: It's another week of 2 Bears 1 Cave with the OG bears Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer! Bert's movie "The Machine" just came out and you should go see it in theatres! They talk about the making of the movie, Tom surprising Bert at the premiere, fun stories about working with Iva Babić, Mark Hamill, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mark Wahlberg. Bert recalls how good some famous people at the premiere were great at interacting with people, and how it's completely different from Joe Rogan's energy, there own energy and Jason Mamoa. And we wrap up with people flubbing Bert's last name and Drink Champs by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

67 min listen

Bert's Blow Up w/ Ari Shaffir | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 191: This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave we have Tom Segura and guest bear Ari Shaffir! They discuss language, how main landers partake in open defecation and their own human dumps. They discuss some Israeli behaviors, Ari’s YouTube special, singers that fell from grace, and traveling in South America and Australia. They talk about how awesome it would be to be gay, and they discuss Mark Normand’s bachelor party where Bert Kreischer had a bit of a meltdown. They exchange stories about knocking things out of people’s hands, Tom’s kids and Ari’s hemorrhoids. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

66 min listen

Chrissy New Glasses w/ Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 178: Go catch Chris at The Theater at MSG in NYC on September 23rd. Get tickets at https://chrisdcomedy.com/tickets. Chris Distefano joins Tom Segura as a guest bear in Bert Kreischer’s place this week! Tom and Chris discuss, Chrissy’s new look, weight loss, the effects of social media, Chris’ new show “Super Maximum Retro Show”, and much more! Chris also shares some hilarious stories about his dad, Tampa Tony, meeting Steven Tyler and Phil Collins, as well as a wild story about an argument Chris witnessed. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

86 min listen

Bears Guide To Style | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 171: Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer unite for another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! The bears talk about how Tom tried surfing, Bert embarrassing Tom in front of Tony Hawk, and embracing doing activities while touring. They discuss people that eat bad food while unhealthy, Testosterone replacement therapy, and how every dude should be getting their clothes tailored. They try to figure out how to make their fans live forever, where they would disappear after they retire from standup comedy, and talk about being really into cars. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

82 min listen

Praying for Laughs w/ Jessica Kirson | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 218 by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

79 min listen

Ep. 96 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Roy Wood Jr.: SPONSORS: - Go to and use code BEARS at checkout to receive 5% off your order - Go to to try it for FREE when you use our promo code BEARS at checkout and just pay $5 shipping. - Go to and enter promo code BEARSVIP to get 15% off - Get your Bud... by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

94 min listen

Ep. 139 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Danny Brown: It's 2 Bears 1 Cave with Tom Segura and guest bear (from YMH Studios' The Danny Brown Show) Danny Brown! Danny talks to Tom about watches, getting his identity stolen, and things he learned from hanging out with Insane Clown Posse. They talk about how Danny got into podcasting, his move to Austin, traveling and performing in different countries, and Ninja from Die Antword trying to pick him up. Then Danny runs Tom through some fashion tips and all the hottest places he gets clothes from. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

73 min listen

Ep. 141 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Ryan Sickler: It's 2 Bears 1 Cave with a sick Tom Segura and guest bear Ryan Sickler! The bears talk about Michelin Star restaurants, Tom's mom's gifts, and Brad Pitt. They talk about how sick they get on the road, people who dip chewing tobacco, the 30 For 30 doc on Street Basketball, and Bill Clinton. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

70 min listen

Body Hacks w/ Andrew Huberman | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 168: It’s another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura and guest bear, Professor Andrew Huberman! They talk about Huberman’s rough and tough upbringing, psychedelics, and cannabis. Huberman gives some insight on brain function, tobacco use, supplements, and performance enhancement drugs. They discuss clean training, teaching while podcasting, explaining the need for sun light and good sleeping habits. They discuss importance of appearance, getting obsessed with stuff like Joe Rogan, and cold plunges. They encourage surrounding yourself with a diverse crowd, the creative process and Tom almost gives Andrew a heart attack. Tom asks Andrew about testosterone for women and to analyze Bert Kreischer's drinking. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

163 min listen

Ep. 142 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Mark Bell: On this week’s episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura is joined by lifter, podcaster, and entrepreneur Mark Bell. Tom and Mark discuss weight lifting injuries, Mark’s extreme weight loss, Tom’s workout routine on the road, improving sleep, squatting 1,000+ lbs, diet, motivation, using PEDs and more! Mark and Tom share the story of how they became friends, they talk about how to help Bert Kreischer “be less fat,” and Tom also reveals the time he was most nervous speaking in front of an audience. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

109 min listen

673 - Sam Morril - Your Mom's House with Christina P and Tom Segura: It's the most high and tight day of the Mom week! On this episode, Tom Segura and Christina P talk about the port-a-potty situation they're dealing with, Brad Pitt's cool nicknames, and meeting Gene Simmons from Kiss. We then welcome podcaster and stand up comedian, Sam Morril! Go check out his new Netflix special "Same Time Tomorrow" streaming RIGHT NOW! Sam and the mommies discuss consuming adult videos at a young age, being able to make something funny on stage, Magic Johnson's Instagram account, and all the celebrity wives that stayed with their husbands after their controversies went public. They talk about an episode of Law and Order SVU that Sam inspired, Tom reports on super cool CEO Dan Price, and Sam talks about getting attacked on stage. Tom talks about a charismatic waiter he had over the weekend who faked being Italian, we revisit some fun stuff from Kevin Samuels, and Sam talks about his new podcast "Ga by Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

117 min listen

Ep. 117 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Ari Shaffir: It's another week of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura and with special guest bear, Ari Shaffir! We analyze some of Carrot Top's wild Instagram posts and ask Ari how he got banned from social media. They talk about how important change is to your life and some fans who are surprised when comedians don't care about their feelings. Ari tells us about his time at J school, Tom shows Ari a heavy clip from YMH Live and an OG clip known as "Man VS Jar." Ari tells Tom about traveling to the Dominican Republic, Tom updates Ari on Bert's health, and they discuss how crazy weed from overseas is. Then they finish on a lighter note and react to a WILD cartel video. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

86 min listen

What Kind of Car is Your Wife? | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 213: Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave. This week, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer discuss the subtle art of beard dyeing, grooming near the groin, midlife crisis energy and much more! Plus, Bert shares some sober realizations he's had recently while being "California sober", and reveals to Tom how he's felt being a little bit lighter. The Bears also debate what type of car their wives are, the greatness of Michael Jordan, gorgeous football players, and discuss why being present is so satisfying. by 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

72 min listen

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Ep. 154 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Greg Fitzsimmons

Ep. 154 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Greg Fitzsimmons

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