On Cultivating the Lovely this week, we have a little different show than what we normally do. Our host MacKenzie Koppa's brother, Kaleb, unexpectedly passed away recently, and in light of that, she wanted to honor him and talk a little about how she and her family are coping. MacKenzie is joined by her good friend Chelle Bruzas for this conversation, in which they also share some ideas on how to support someone in the early stages of grief. MacKenzie shares what it was like to grow up with her brother having significant physical disabilities, primarily Spina Bifida She talks about the strength and courage her parents have had throughout Kaleb’s whole life Chelle shares a little of her own family’s story of advocating for her brother when he had leukemia MacKenzie shares about Kaleb’s incredibly full life and his ability to find the joy and humor in situations The gift that it was for MacKenzie and her children to have so much close time with her brother last year How much it meant for their family’s pastor to meet with them and understand their feelings Holding the heartbreak along with the mercy of healing and wholeness Facing the truth of how hard and ugly grief is instead of throwing platitudes at people The ways God has shown His love and provision in the midst of intense difficulty MacKenzie talks about her family’s tendency to choose laughter over tears, even in tough times She shares how important it is to give others the space to grieve in their own way Some practical ways that people have reached out and been a blessing: Just being there to listen Providing meals for the family Giving flowers for the funeral Helping with technology and practical aspects of the service Not being offended when an offer is turned down Check back in next week for our more light-hearted episode featuring the Cultivating the Lovely Gift Guide! And here are the link to the gift guides if you would like to view them prior to the show- CTL Christmas Gift Guide for Toddlers CTL Christmas Gift Guide for Boys CTL Christmas Gift Guide for Teen Girls CTL Guys Christmas Gift Guide CTL Ladies Christmas Gift Guide Kaleb Koppa January 29, 1986-November 13, 2019 Kaleb was 33 yrs old when God reached down and scooped him up to heaven. He slipped away in his sleep on Wednesday, November 13th, 2019. Kaleb was born on January 29, 1984, and at the time of his passing lived with his parents, Jeff and Lori Koppa, in Kendall Yards in Spokane, WA. Kaleb is survived by them as well as his older sister, MacKenzie; her four children, Roman, Judah, Emmerson and Elliana; his grandparents Ida Collins, Linda Collins, Jim and Jeannette Koppa; his aunt and uncle Michelle and Rick Pettina and their son, Jackson; as well as many other loving aunts, uncles and cousins. Kaleb had a life rich in experiences- his disability never held him back from trying new things. Though it was assumed by doctors that he may never walk, by the age of three he could walk confidently, unaided, and he did so until the age of 13 when complications from his Spina Bifida necessitated a wheelchair as his new mode of mobility. As a child he was known for his incredible memory and proficiency with electronics. He was always the guy who took care of all the technological details and foibles of his family. In his youth he acted in plays, water and snow skied, rode horses, and even tried indoor rock climbing. In high school he played on St. Luke’s wheelchair basketball team and participated twice in the Para Olympic Trials for a variety of sports including track, table tennis, weightlifting, and archery. He was even known to command the dance floor at high school dances with his amazing rhythm. After graduating from Mt. Spokane HS, Kaleb went on to receive an AA Degree in Hotel and Restaurant Management from SCC, and worked for a number of years with youth at the YMCA.  Kaleb is best remembered, however, for his love and care for people and animals. He never realized how inspirational he was to s