Sanitation City: Journey to the Grand Incinerator

By JFL and B.D. Lee

Welcome to Sanitation City - The city that keeps the world clean!
Or, at least, that's what YIN-SED & Co., The Waste Management Company,
would lead you to believe. The truth is, in Sanitation City, life is fleeting. Three lowly YIN-SED & Co. employees, Frank, Joe and Steve, know this better than anyone. All they can do to survive in this dystopian world is keep their heads down and stay in their lane. That's until they cross paths with a hard-ass intergalactic android detective (that's a mouthful) known as TIM, who crash landed in Sanitation City on the hunt for an intergalactic fugitive. TIM is forced to enlist the aid of Frank, Joe and Steve in order to track down the fugitive, and the lowly sanitation workers must stick by TIM's side if they wish to survive. The first step towards survival is a journey to the Grand Incinerator!
- Get ready to be offended in this raunchy, sci-fi comedy romp!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Publishdrive
• Release date: May 4, 2024
• ISBN: 9798893722161

Book preview

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Copyright © 2024 by JFL

All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. For permission requests, contact [e-mail].

The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.

Book Cover by B.D. Lee

Illustrations by B.D. Lee

First Edition 2024

Contents

Chapter 0

The Prologue

1.Chapter 1

1. The Fly, The Roach, & The Robot

2.Chapter 2

2. The White-Collar Blues

3.Chapter 3

3. Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind

4.Chapter 4

4. The Ultimate Detective

5.Chapter 5

5. The Pizza Gate

6.Chapter 6

6. The Itsy-Bitsy Spider

7.Chapter 7

7. Just Walk Away

8.Chapter 8

8. Frank 'N Beans

9.Chapter 9

9. Hunger Pains

10.Chapter 10

10. Curious George

11.Chapter 11

11. The Heated Showdown at Dawn

The Epilogue

About the Creators

Trigger Warning

This story contains mature language and themes not suitable for children. Not intended for humorless prudes or the easily offended. If you have an aversion to poop, dick jokes, cuss words, laughter, fun, pop cultural references and political incorrectness, you will be triggered. You’ve been warned.

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- Dedicated to all the people that don’t have their heads so far up their asses they forgot how much shit they’re full of

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Chapter 0

The Prologue

The silence of space sits unsettled and still.

Vast and seemingly endless.

A spherical metallic object interrupts the stillness as it zips through the void. This metallic object houses an artificial intelligence that is sophisticated beyond imagination. An intelligence so advanced that it would consider mankind to be primitive primates destined to wipe their own existence from the face of the Earth in one way or another. The A.I.’s spacecraft approaches a planet that glistens of blue oceans and green landmasses. The craft’s navigational system informs the pilot of their current status.

"Approaching Planet Terra 3-C.

Danger Level: Low.

Probability of fugitive presence: 98%."

Good, the pilot replies to his nav-system, Gladys, let’s make landing preparations.

Landing preparations enga-

Gladys is abruptly interrupted when a red beam of energy appears from seemingly nowhere and rips completely through the spherical craft’s hull.

D-Danger! D- nger! E-Emerg- Landin- Danger! Impact inevitable! Gladys’ alarms ring out as the craft pummels uncontrollably towards the planet.

The spacecraft bursts through the planet’s thick atmosphere in a trail of vibrant flames before eventually crashing into the ocean, an enormous splash sending shockwaves that travel for miles. Finally, the craft settles at the ocean’s floor. Ironically, the ocean’s depths mimic the unsettling calm and silence of deep space. Any sign of life that the craft or its occupant once displayed is now dead and still. There, the craft lays for a thousand years. So long, in fact, that the ocean around it has dried up and vanished. It now sits half submerged in mud, filth, and mounds of trash. All around the craft is an expansive wasteland of mountainous garbage heaps. Scattered amongst the trash is a group of trash collectors that work for the largest and most powerful corporation on the planet.

YIN-SED & Co. The Waste Management Company.

But these trash collectors aren’t human. Humans no longer populate the glistening blue marble we call Earth. Instead, various creatures, such as insects, reptiles and amphibians, have evolved and taken the role humans once played. The lot of these trash collectors are insectoids, or humanoid insects, bug-men, also known as buggers, if you’d like to be derogatory. The one barking orders at them is a heavyset, gravelly voiced amphibious humanoid, better known as a toad-man. The toad-man fashions a brightly colored vest and hardhat, and puffs on an oversized cigar.

"Hurry it up, buggers! the toad-man shouts as his workers scurry about, Upper management wants this sector cleared out within the hour!"

One of the bug-men trash collectors stands atop the dead old spacecraft, which is mostly submerged in rubbish and grime.

Hey, Boss, the worker calls out as he inspects the craft, "I got a huge hunk of metal here, we’re gonna need to call in a T-Dozer!"

Fine, the boss toad replies, Call it in.

Just as the bug-man calls HQ to request the T-Dozer, his foot slips and touches an exposed electronic on the spacecraft’s hull. A giant spark bursts as the bug-man is electrocuted to death, his crispy body flopping to the ground in a heap of sizzling charred insect.

"Gary! one of the bug-men cries as he rushes to Gary’s side, I think he’s dead, Boss!"

Bring him to me. the boss toad mutters.

While the flock of bug-men and the boss toad are preoccupied with Gary, the spacecraft flickers to life in an array of lights. A life that lasts for just a moment as the craft spits out a small, metallic, spherical object with a red circular glowing eye at its center. The metallic sphere floats just off the ground as it lingers and observes the unwitting trash collectors. Eventually, it turns and floats away. Meanwhile, one of the bug-men drags Gary’s crisped body to the boss toad. The boss toad glares at Gary with a hungry twinkle in his eye before lashing out his slimy tongue and snatching Gary into his mouth. Gary’s leg twitches as the boss toad chomps away with a smug expression stretched across his plump face. But life in this world is fleeting. Too fleeting.

Just as boss toad is enjoying his freshly cooked meal, the T-Dozer that was summoned screeches upon them. One of the T-Dozer’s enormous tires effortlessly rolls over the unaware boss toad and promptly squishes him flat. His leg twitches as his body is pulverized with the sound of a squishy pop.

The T-Dozer’s bug-man operator sticks his head out of the window and looks down towards where the boss toad stood.

"God, damn it, the T-Dozer operator shouts, Did I kill another one?! That’s the third time this week… Marcus is gonna have my ass!"

The trash collecting bug-men saunter about, seemingly unaffected by the death that surrounds them. To those that are privileged enough not to know such death would consider their lack of emotion as cold, but for the trash collectors of the wasteland, this is just an average Friday.

Not too far from the gruesome scene stands a crooked and battered steel sign that reads;

‘Welcome to Sanitation City

Home of YIN-SED & Co.

Trash Heaven is only one heap away!’

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Chapter 1

The Fly, The Roach, & The Robot

8:38 AM. Friday. July 25 th, 3012.

Sanitation City, The Wasteland.

Sanitation City is an expansive stretch of land that has been consumed by mountains of trash and waste. A place where hopes and dreams are buried beneath the endless heaps of rubbish. This metropolis of garbage is owned by YIN-SED & Co. The Waste Management Company. YIN-SED & Co. uses Sanitation City as an enormous landfill where trash is dumped and scavenged to recycle any useful resources. Scattered throughout the city are four districts: The Wasteland, the Business District, the Corporate District and the Residential District, or better known as the slums. The Residential District is where the majority of low-level YIN-SED & Co. employees live. Let’s just say, these employees don’t have the greatest benefits, or life expectancy.

All trash collectors, drivers, divers, mechanics, and inspectors are to report to YIN-SED & Co. Building D. Building D is a massive sprawling structure, monotonous in design, akin to that of a Costco, that stands at the outskirts of the expansive Wasteland. Within the bland building, employees scurry about with their morning routines. Two of these employees are Frank, a lazy but kind-hearted fly-man, and Joe, a quick talking cowardly roach-man. Frank and Joe are a pair of trash collectors that also happen to be roommates. They punch-in to their shifts as they casually chat. Joe tells Frank about one of the bug-ladies that work in the mailroom.

Her abdomen was out to here, you could see that thing from the front! he gestures how big it was with his hands, And the way her thorax was bulging, I was about to bust a flex out of my non-existent pants-

Joe’s words are swiftly interrupted when he is smothered beneath a huge blood-filled sack. Frank looks up to see that this blood-filled sack is attached to Marcus, the large muscle-headed mosquito-man and site manager of Building D. Frank can hear Joe’s muffled groans as he is smothered beneath Marcus’ blood-filled butt. Marcus glances back and notices Frank sauntering about.

"Hey, Frank, you’re late! Marcus barks, Where’s that fuck-face, Joe?"

Frank begins to answer but is interrupted when a tiny bug-man nervously walks by. The bug-man waves at Frank.

Hey, Frank. the tiny bug-man timidly mutters.

Mornin’, Jeff. Frank replies.

Marcus suddenly impales Jeff through the torso with his needle-like nose-sucker. He sucks poor Jeff of all his blood and bodily fluids as Jeff shrivels like a raisin. Jeff’s blood pumps into Marcus as Marcus’ butt swells with fresh blood and his veins pop. Marcus roars with pleasure as he spits Jeff into the air and flexes his bulging muscles. Jeff’s shriveled body flies into the air and eventually comes down, bouncing off Frank’s head before finally settling on the floor.

"Whew! Marcus exclaims with pleasurable relief as he looks to Frank, Hey, sorry you had to see that, bro. I had to fire Jeff just now. Third time this week he killed one of my guys with that damned T-Dozer. Son of a bitch should have learned how to drive. Took Boss Toad out this mornin’."

"Wait, Boss Toad is dead?" Frank asks.

Yeah, that amphibious prick had it comin’, Marcus answers, "Anyway, when you see Joe, tell ’em I’m lookin’ for ’em. Now get to work, bro! Before I get the urge to suck you off next!"

Marcus turns and walks away as Joe slides from beneath his swollen butt.

"God damn, Joe gasps for air as he climbs to his feet, Any longer and I would’ve suffocated! Let’s get the fuck out of here before he comes back!"

Moments later, the pair traverse the wasteland of garbage in their raggedy YIN-SED & Co. hover-truck. Frank drives as grungy music blares from the speakers and Joe obnoxiously headbangs in the passenger seat. Eventually, they arrive at a Nuke Pit in Sector D4, which they have been assigned, and disembark from the vehicle. The Nuke Pits are massive holes in the earth that emit enormous levels of radiation and are scattered throughout the Wasteland. Only specially equipped divers are permitted to enter these radiated pits that lead to vast tunnels of trash. No one truly knows how the Nuke Pits came to be. All that’s known for sure is they’re one of the most dangerous places in all of Sanitation City.

Not too far away, an ominous metallic sphere with an eye that glows red floats along a ridge that looks down upon Sector D4. The floating sphere spots Frank and Joe working at a distance.

Frank prepares his specialized diving mask and jumpsuit while Joe relentlessly yaps away.

"You didn’t even help me, you just stood there! And believe me when I tell you, Marcus’ ass smells like dirty ass. I know ass is supposed to smell like ass, and usually I’m into that kind of thing, but this was beyond regular ass smell. I’m a roach and even I can’t tolerate that smelly blood-filled asshole! And did you see how that maniac sucked on Jeff like a goddamned smoothie?!"

Joe speaks too fast for Frank to get a word in, but Frank isn’t listening very much anyway.

Why don’t you get your Diver’s License? Frank asks while he fastens his hood and tightens the diver’s mask that’s strapped over his face.

"What?!" Joe spits.

A Diver’s License, Frank repeats, Why don’t you get one? I get paid extra for this, you know, and you’re always complainin’ about money. Plus, it could help with the rent.

Hey, man, Joe replies, "If you’re willin’ to lower yourself into a hole filled with a million ways to kill you, that’s on you. I’m not willin’ to take that chance. Nuh-uh, fuck that. There are things down there that eat bugs like us for breakfast, and things down there that eat the things that eat bugs like us for breakfast, for breakfast."

I’m just sayin’, Frank rebuts, You’re a roach, would be perfect for the job.

Nah, Joe tells him, I’m good up here, just an average trash collector. Have fun in your little murder hole, though.

Frank shrugs as he grabs his trash collecting hose before sputtering the wings on his back and lowering himself into the Nuke Pit. He descends deeper and deeper into darkness as the goggles on his hood flicker to life and emits a bright beam that guides his way. Finally, he touches the ground and cautiously walks along one of the immense tunnels. Frank calmly turns on his trash-hose and casually begins to suck up various hunks of radiated trash and debris. As he does so, he cranks up the volume on his headphones which blares a grungy beat to help drown out his terrifying surroundings. Frank whistles to the music as he continues inhaling trash into the hose before a moving shadow suddenly flickers past him. He sees the movement from the corner of his eye and quickly snaps his gaze in its direction as he turns off the hose and pauses his music. Frank squints and looks for something moving in the darkness, but whatever it was, it’s gone now. Either that, or Frank is losing his mind down here. Perhaps Joe’s idiocy is rubbing off on him. He shrugs it off and turns his hose back on to begin working once more. But after a few seconds, Frank sees the moving shadow pass him again, this time from the opposite direction. He swiftly turns off his hose and looks in the direction that he saw the movement.

"What the hell?! Frank quietly mutters to himself before calling out into the darkness, H-Hey! Who’s there?! It’s not a giant monster that eats bugs like me for breakfast, is it?! Or an even gianter monster that’s eats giant monsters that eats bugs like me for breakfast, for breakfast?"

Frank squints down the tunnel but sees and hears nothing in response.

Hey! Frank says again, Is anybody there?!

Frank pauses a few seconds in silence, and just as he is about to call out once more, a red glowing light appears from within the shadows.

"What the...?" Frank utters with bewilderment and fear.

Suddenly, the ominously staring red light comes barreling towards him from the darkness.

"OH, SHIT!" Frank cries as the object zips to him with incredible speed.

Frank presses his back to the wall and the object stops just in front of his face, the red glowing light staring intently.

"Please don’t kill me, please don’t kill me, please don’t kill me!" Frank repeats in terror.

After a few moments of no killing, Frank slowly opens his eyes and looks at the object. What he sees is a floating metallic sphere with a red glowing light for an eye. Frank gazes at the sphere in awe as he watches his contorted reflection in the sphere’s eye.

"What are you?" Frank wonders aloud.

The sphere studies Frank with intense curiosity.

H-Hey, little buddy. Frank whispers to the mysterious object as he reaches out to touch it.

At first, the floating sphere pulls away from Frank’s touch, and Frank pulls his hand away in return.