Pregnant Pages: Maternity of Words

By Heinz G. Ross

In the context of this literary work, 'Pregnant Pages: Maternity of Words' metaphorically explores the birthing and nurturing of creative ideas. It is unrelated to the conventional sense of childbearing or maternity.

'Pregnant Pages' houses published articles touching on real-world topics, adopting light-hearted or satirical approaches. Some articles are metaphorical, symbolic, satirical, or outright absurd. Approach them with a figurative lens, embracing the interplay of wit, humour, and social commentary. 'Pregnant Pages' weaves personal introspection and lived experiences into its fabric. Each self-contained story within this collection is a complete narrative in itself and holds no connection to the next. The work is enhanced with approximately 294 images, many of which are AI-generated, to complement and enrich the reading experience. These visuals add a vibrant dimension to the stories, creating a visually immersive journey that harmonizes with the diverse tales within these pages. Additionally, where deemed necessary, trigger warnings or parental guidance are included to alert readers to sensitive content, ensuring a thoughtful and considerate engagement with the narratives.

• Language: English
• Publisher: HR Publishing
• Release date: Jan 9, 2024
• ISBN: 9780645928136

Book preview

Pregnant Pages

Maternity of Words

by

Heinz G. Ross

2024

Copyright Notice

Copyright © 2024

All rights reserved

Heinz G. Ross

Gold Coast, Australia

No part of this publication, titled 'Pregnant Pages,' may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.

The author asserts the rights as the sole owner of the copyright for 'Pregnant Pages.' This includes, but is not limited to, all written content, illustrations, images, and accompanying materials contained within the book.

Unauthorised duplication, distribution, or transmission of this book, in whole or in part, whether in print or in electronic form, is strictly prohibited and may be subject to legal action.

Any enquiries regarding permissions or requests to reproduce content from 'Pregnant Pages' should be addressed to the author.

The author deeply values and respects the rights of others, and every effort has been made to ensure the lawful use of copyrighted materials and to provide proper attribution for any third-party content included within 'Pregnant Pages.' In the event that any unintentional infringement has occurred, the author kindly requests that individuals contact them promptly to address and rectify the situation.

The author appreciates the support and respect of readers, fellow authors, and the broader creative community in upholding the principles of copyright protection. Your adherence to these rights helps to foster creativity, encourage innovation, and promote the continued production of meaningful literary works.

Thank you for your understanding and compliance with this copyright notice.

ISBN: 978-0-6459281-2-9 (Hardcover)

ISBN: 978-0-6459281-3-6 (e-book)

BISAC codes:

FIC002000 (FICTION Action & Adventure) FIC010000 (FICTION Fairy, Folk Tales, Legends & Mythology) FIC067000 (FICTION / Animals)

FIC029000 (FICTION / Short Stories (single author) LCO000000 (LITERARY COLLECTIONS / General)

FIC009020 (FICTION / Fantasy / Epic)

FIC009080 (FICTION / Fantasy / Humorous)

FIC037000 (FICTION / Political)

FIC027260 (FICTION Romance Action & Adventure) FIC052000 (FICTION / Satire)

CGN033000 (COMICS & GRAPHIC NOVELS / Satire) FAM002000 (FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS Activities) MUS050000 (MUSIC Individual Composer & Musician) FAM014000 (FAMILY&RELATIONSHIPS/ Death, Grief, Bereavement)

Disclaimer

In the context of this literary work, 'Pregnant Pages: Maternity of Words' metaphorically explores the birthing and nurturing of creative ideas. It is unrelated to the conventional sense of child bearing or maternity.

The contents of this book, titled 'Pregnant Pages,' are intended for entertainment, creative exploration, and intellectual stimulation. The author would like to provide the following disclaimer to ensure clarity and understanding for readers:

Fictitious Nature: The stories, characters, events, and scenarios portrayed in this book are primarily products of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to real events is purely coincidental. The author has taken creative liberties to construct fictional narratives for the purpose of storytelling.

Literary License: The author has employed literary license throughout the book. Certain words, phrases, or expressions may be used metaphorically, symbolically, or in a manner that deviates from their literal or conventional meanings. Readers are encouraged to approach the text with an open mind, recognising the author's intention to evoke emotions, provoke thought, and create a unique literary experience.

Satirical and Tongue-in-Cheek Content: Some sections of the book may include satirical elements, humour, or a 'tongue-in-cheek' approach to certain subjects. Readers should interpret such content with an understanding of the author's intention to entertain and engage in social commentary.

'Pregnant Pages' includes AI-generated images, as well as illustrations and photographs to enhance the visual aspect of the text (approx. 294).

Individual Interpretation: The themes, ideas, and messages conveyed in 'Pregnant Pages' are subject to individual interpretation. Readers are encouraged to engage with the text critically and form their own perspectives based on their personal experiences and beliefs.

The author appreciates readers' engagement with the book and encourages an open dialogue about its contents.

However, the author cannot be held responsible for any personal reactions, opinions, or actions arising from the reading or interpretation of 'Pregnant Pages.'

Table of Contents

Copyright Notice

Disclaimer

Table of Contents

Links

Preface (Pregnant Pages)

Short Stories…

Preface (What's an 'anything?')

What's an 'anything?'

Preface (In the Shadow of the Sun)

In the shadow of the sun

Preface (Only for now)

Only for now

Once

How does it work?

Seek your past

Seeking identity

The beginning

Void filled

Become

Peace in war, war in peace

Awareness

What do you see?

Seeing with senses

Am I blind?

Now is

Navigating 'The Puma's Trail'

Preface (The Puma's Trail)

Parental Guidance

The Puma's Trail

The Puma: The Eagle

The Puma: The Alley Cat

The Puma: Past memories

The Puma: The Goose

The Puma: The Marlin

The Puma: The Butterfly

The Puma: The Mantis

The Puma: The Whale

The Puma: The Cockatoo

The Puma: The Gull

The Puma: The Crystal

The Transformation:

The Conception:

The Twins: Asha and Tobin are born

The Twins: The morning rituals

The Twins: The falling in love

The Twins: The age of juveniles

The Twins: Tobin’s friendship

The Twins: Aged 18-20

The Puma: In search for food

The Puma: In search for a kill

The Twins: As adults 25-35

The Twins: The living picture

The Puma: Standing still is no option

The Puma: The search for hell

The Puma: Towards the unknown

The Twins: The recovery

The Twins: Finding purpose

The Puma: Caged fights

The Puma: The escape

The Twins: The answer within

The Twins: The living canvas

The Twins: Gossip spreads

The Twins: At Perrin’s place

The Puma: Albatross finding the edge

The Puma: Trapped with a tiger

The Puma: Encircled

The Puma: Recaptured

The Puma: The punishment

The Puma: The nightmare

The Twins: Two Graves

The Twin: Searching for sound

The Twins: The sharing of a new sound

The Twins: The Performance

The Twins: The loss of things

The Puma: The finding

The Puma: Return to the woods

The Twins: Years on

The Puma: Reflection

Preface (E is not happy)

E is not happy

Preface (Circle Beach)

Circle Beach

Preface (Pearl's falling)

Pearl’s falling

Preface (Falcon in Freefall)

Falcon in freefall

Articles, thoughts…

I do bequeath

A little is plenty

Twins

Disclaimer (Hear, hear)

Hear, hear

Wheelies

Consumption

Two dreams

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Show and tell

Perpetua

Welcome to our country

Nonsense about flies

Pessimistic one-day-fly:

One-day-fly in the afternoon:

Forgetful one-day-fly:

Hopes of a one-day-fly:

Fly communications:

Breadcrumbs International Flyport:

Fly school:

No bang

Isn’t it time?

Working conditions, remuneration and related matters:

Application to wage war

Financial gains from war

Rules of engagement

An unlawful reason to wage war

It's you

Hurricane

Immortal infancy

Internet creations

Time for a speeding ticket

Time will take some time

Insomnia

How to become a successful insomniac

‘borning’

I think I know.

Where were we?

Sell-All Corp

Toys for kids

Tomorrow

Nora’s eyes (1)

Ethics

About the author:



Links

Website: http://www.heinzross.com

Email: mailto:[e-mail]

All Videos: Youtube Video link

Music Videos playlist: Music Videos

Music & Video: reverbnation

Music (Audio only): https://heinzross.bandcamp.com/

Music (Audio only): https://soundcloud.com/heinzross

Preface (Pregnant Pages)

Welcome to 'Pregnant Pages,' a captivating collection that chronicles years of my creative journey, presenting a diverse array of self-contained short stories, articles, and thought-provoking musings.

Embark on a captivating exploration of imagination and introspection within these pages. While the characters and events may bear resemblance to real-life, they are primarily products of my imagination. Any resemblance is coincidental; these fictitious narratives exist for storytelling and artistic expression.

This book features several self-contained stories, each with their own preface. These works offer unique lenses for exploring diverse topics, inviting you on mini literary adventures within the larger tapestry.

'Pregnant Pages' also houses published articles touching on real-world topics, adopting light-hearted or satirical approaches. Some articles are metaphorical, symbolic, satirical, or outright absurd. Approach them with a figurative lens, embracing the interplay of wit, humour, and social commentary.

'Pregnant Pages' weaves personal introspection and lived experiences into its fabric. These reflections provide glimpses into my life and inspirations, enriching the collection.

Given its extensive content, 'Pregnant Pages' is not designed for a single sitting. Each self-contained story within this collection is a complete narrative in itself and holds no connection to the next. Feel free to savour its richness over time, knowing that you can put the book down after any story and return whenever you're ready. This allows diverse voices

and perspectives to unfold gradually, offering a unique and fulfilling reading experience.

Encounter a variety of words used under literary license, serving to evoke emotion, ignite imagination, and breathe life into stories and ideas. May they transport you to new realms, challenging perceptions and illuminating the human experience.

'Pregnant Pages' is enhanced with approximately 294 images, many of which are AI-generated, to complement and enrich the reading experience. These visuals add a vibrant dimension to the stories, creating a visually immersive journey that harmonizes with the diverse tales within these pages.

Additionally, where deemed necessary, trigger warnings or parental guidance are included to alert readers to sensitive content, ensuring a thoughtful and considerate engagement with the narratives.

Thank you for joining this literary odyssey. May the pages of

'Pregnant

Pages'

ignite

your

imagination,

provoke

contemplation, and offer moments of wonder as you navigate its intricate tapestry.

In forthcoming works, I'll unequivocally employ the name Heinz G. Ross, adorned with my unique HR logo, differentiating myself from others sharing the name 'Heinz Ross,' while emphasizing my location in Gold Coast, Australia.

Heinz G. Ross

Short Stories…

Preface (What's an 'anything?')

What's an anything? is a thought-provoking journey into the realm of dreams, desires, and the power of belief. In this captivating tale, we follow the introspective conversations between Aphra and her wise companion, Tomoko, as they unravel the significance of a dream that left Aphra with a beautiful feeling upon awakening.

Aphra's dream introduces the concept of the anything, an enigmatic object that possesses the remarkable ability to transform into whatever one desires. As Aphra navigates the possibilities offered by these mysterious anythings, she discovers the delicate balance between fulfilling personal desires and using this power to make a positive impact on the world.

Through their engaging dialogue, Aphra and Tomoko explore the intricacies of dreams, language, and the human psyche.

They delve into the nuances of intention, emphasising the importance of choosing our words carefully, as dreams often take them literally. They also touch upon the fear of greed and the responsibility that comes with possessing the ability to have anything one wishes for.

As Aphra contemplates the boundless potential of the

anything, she ponders noble causes and envisions a world free from strife and suffering. Her journey of self-discovery leads her to consider the impact her choices could have on others and how she might utilise this extraordinary power for the greater good.

What's an anything? invites readers to reflect on their own dreams, aspirations, and the hidden power that lies within each of us. It encourages us to question the boundaries of what we believe is possible and to explore the transformative nature of our desires. Ultimately, this book serves as a

reminder that our words and beliefs shape our reality and that we hold the key to unlocking the infinite potential of the human spirit.

Join Aphra and Tomoko on their enchanting quest as they unravel the mysteries of dreams, uncover the essence of true desire, and embark on a profound exploration of the boundless possibilities that lie within the realm of the mind.

Prepare to be captivated, inspired, and awakened to the wonders that await when we dare to dream and believe that anything is possible.

Heinz G. Ross

What's an 'anything?'

Last night I had this dream and when I woke up I had this beautiful feeling.

Did you now? answered Tomoko. What did you dream about, Aphra?

It was about anything.

It would have been better if it was about something,

Tomoko replied.

No, no, anything was more than just something. You see, in this dream I was in a house and it felt like my house, I said. I was sitting on the bed in the bedroom and around the whole room was a narrow shelf, about a foot wide. It would have been just above my head. It was all around the room.

"On the shelf was a blue object of no particular shape. I wondered what it was. The voice in my dream said that the blue thing was an ‘anything’. First I didn’t understand it, but the voice explained if I ever needed anything at all, then I could just use the ‘anything’ and it becomes whatever I need.

The voice said I got to be careful what I wish for."

Oh, that’s good, said Tomoko, what happened then?

We’ll, I got four more of them, this time in red. Four more of those ‘anythings’ I mean.

That was clever, answered Tomoko, but I could see she thought I must have gone a bit nuts.

What happened then, Aphra? she asked.

As I was sitting on the bed, I could see water coming into the room. I guess the bathtub must have been overflowing. The water was maybe 2 or 3 inches deep.

Oh my goodness, said Tomoko.

"The funny thing is that it didn’t worry me in the slightest. I was high and dry sitting on the bed and actually had to grin. I thought it would be a good idea to try out the ‘anything.' So, I

threw the blue one on the floor, in the water, and it became a stepping stone. When I stepped on it my feet were dry."

And then? asked Tomoko.

"Well, I had four more, but I thought if I use them all up then I haven’t got anything left. It felt like a waste to use a good

‘anything’ for something so simple."

Aphra, tell me, what happened then? asked Tomoko, eager to hear the outcome. That’s when I woke up Tomoko. I felt so happy. It was like an answer for any problem one might has to face," said I.

"Wouldn’t it be good, if we had an endless supply of

‘anythings’?"

Ah yes, and then I went shopping. The big sign said ‘Anything for sale,’ but they didn’t have anything I wanted.

What did you want? asked Tomoko.

I wanted something.

"Then you mustn’t look for anything if you want something.

You should have looked for something, said Tomoko in a very wise manner. You’re right Tomoko," I said.

That’s why you didn’t find anything, reiterated Tomoko,

and you didn’t want to use one of your special ‘anythings’ to turn them into a something. She grinned when she said that.

No, no. I couldn’t do that Tomoko. I want to use them for something special.

Then Tomoko’s face lit up and she said, I’ve got an idea.

I asked, What?

These ‘anythings’ could become something, right?

Yes. I replied.

And that something could be anything, right? Tomoko said.

Yes. Well, I think so, I replied.

So all you got to do is get one of those anythings and turn it into a dozen somethings, but don’t specify what they are. And then you have twelve anythings you can use, said Tomoko.

Good idea, I said and Tomoko answered, If you do it right, you’ll have an endless supply of anything at all. Then you can do something.

Her face was shining like a light bulb.

I could, said I and wondered if I was becoming greedy if I did.

Then Tomoko said, Let’s say you look into your fridge and you had run out of eggs.

Yes.

You wouldn’t just ask for 1 egg, would you? she said.

No, perhaps not, said I.

You’d ask for a dozen, Tomoko suggested.

Yes, most likely I would.

Tomoko’s face became more thoughtful when she said, But you got to be careful with dreams.

Why is that Tomoko?

They take you word for word, Tomoko answered, not by what you mean, but exactly by the word and by what the word means. Not what you mean when you say it.

I must have looked a bit puzzled when she explained.

Let’s say you are angry with your cat, and you say ‘bloody cat’, what you mean by that is not that the cat is covered in blood, do you?

No.

But your dream takes your word exactly as you say it and then it becomes a cat in blood, to the dream, said Tomoko.

I see, said I, but Tomoko was quick to correct me, No, what you meant is: ‘I understand’.

You are so lucky, Aphra, said Tomoko, no wonder you were happy when you woke up.

But it was just a dream, said I.

What? Don’t you know anything? A dream is a message,

said Tomoko. It is telling you that you can have anything you want. You better believe it, she added, and she was very convinced about it.

The ‘anything’ in your dream is everything. Don’t you get it?

she said and looked really seriously at me. But I’m afraid, I said. Of what, Aphra?

What if it doesn’t work, I’m back to an ordinary life. And what if it does work? What if I ask for the wrong things and when I get it I may want to change my mind and then I’ve wasted it?

If I do nothing, at least I can believe that it may be true, I said, but if I try it and it fails to work I may lose my belief.

Tomoko just laughed.

I am afraid of becoming greedy if it does work, said I.

Tomoko continued to laugh. After a while, she asked, Let’s go back to the dream. You threw the blue ‘anything’ into the water on the floor. That’s what you said.

I did.

And what happened, Aphra? It turned into a stepping stone, right?

It did.

What colour was the stepping stone? Was it blue? she asked.

No. It was the colour of stone and flat at the top.

And you stepped on it and it was still a stone? she asked.

Yes. It felt solid, just like a real stone.

And then you woke up, said Tomoko.

"A little later I woke up. I figured to get to the bathroom would have been about eight steps. I knew the four other

‘anythings’ would not have been enough to cover the

distance. I stood on the stepping-stone and tried to figure out a way to get to the bathroom without wasting all my

'anythings.'

I thought I could get by using just one more. Each step I could have bent backwards and pick up the last stone to move that one in front of me and so on.

Did you? she asked.

No. I thought the stone would be heavy to lift and I may slip and fall into the water. Then I thought what a waste to use the special ‘anythings’ just to keep my feet dry.

I thought of asking for more ‘anythings,' but I didn’t ask, for fear of becoming greedy.

And then? asked Tomoko.

That’s when I woke up. And I had this happy feeling when I woke up.

She pondered for a moment and then said, The dream told you all you needed to know. Just go for it. Turn anything into whatever you desire.

She smiled like one of those blessed people with an inner calm.

But Tomoko, I left my ‘anythings’ in the dream, I said.

Silly you, don’t you get it? Anything will do! she said.

Let’s try it with something that is red. Use a red bottle top or a red capsicum. It doesn’t matter what it is. Have you got any tomatoes? she asked.

No. I ran out of them yesterday, I said.

Aphra! You did not run out of your tomatoes yesterday, she said. You better watch your language, and I mean every word you say, otherwise you could do more harm than good.

How can tomatoes be anything? I asked.

You see my car over there, in the carport?

Yes. I answered.

If there is anything in the carport, what is it? Tomoko asked.

Yes, your car.

"Therefore a car is anything, the same with tomatoes.

Anything is just a metaphor for any one thing, whatever that thing is doesn’t matter."

How can tomatoes turn into something else? I asked.

That’s not your problem, Aphra. The dream said it could be done. Let the dream worry about how that is done. said Tomoko, and I think she meant it.

Aphra, let me tell you this, Tomoko said, dreams are stupid. They don’t know what you mean. They only know what you say.

Then she added, "It’s actually the other way around. We are the stupid ones, because we always say what we don’t mean.

And even while I’m saying this, I realise that this is wrong too,

because sometimes we can say what we mean. But not all too often."

Then I thought for a while and said, Tomoko, if I could have anything I want..., but Tomoko interrupted me.

Wrong, she said.

What’s wrong? I asked.

What you just said, she replied.

What have I said?

You said ‘could’. You should have said ‘I can have anything I want, etc, etc, etc, said Tomoko. Why were you happy this morning when you woke up?

Because I had this lovely dream, I said.

Wrong, said Tomoko. You were happy because you believed in the dream. You were happy because you were wishing ‘what if’ that was real. You were happy because it felt as if it is real.

I guess so.

You must never forget that feeling. You must keep the same belief in every word you say, said Tomoko. "If you say ‘could’

you start to throw doubt on your own belief and bye, bye, it’s all over."

OK. I said, If I can have anything I want...

Aphra, no ‘if’s’ if you please, she interjected.

...anything I want, wouldn’t it make me feel rather special? I continued my line of thought.

Aren’t you? she questioned.

"But if I would get every wish granted, would I not get bored?

What else is there to look forward to?" I said.

Aren’t there lots of other people who would deserve it more, others who have a real need for such a special gift? I wondered.

Listen to me, Aphra, said Tomoko with a voice like my teacher in Grade 7. "The dream was just a reminder to you, so

that you are aware of the gifts that are within you. Other people have them too."

But..., and Tomoko cut me short.

Aphra, you ask too many questions, she said, be glad that you’ve been given an answer and don’t question it.

Tomoko, what I wanted to say before you interrupted me, was trying to find something that is worthwhile wishing for, I said, just in case the endless supply of ‘anythings’ doesn’t work.

I need to find a good and noble cause, so that the wish does the most good.

This time Tomoko did not interrupt me and waited for more.

If I wished for all the hospital to shut down, because no one was going to need them, no one was going to be sick, I said,

but imagine, how much one of those ‘anythings’ could be worth?

What if I wished for peace on earth? That’s a good thing to wish for, said I. "Can you just grasp how much that is worth?

There is not enough money in the whole world to buy health or peace on earth. How can the little ‘anything’ I have be worth that much?"

Tomoko didn’t say a word and within a few seconds I had a whole list of good wishes that would be ideal to sacrifice an

‘anything’ for.

Peace on earth, enough food for all, no more fighting and arguments, a healthier environment, climate change, endangered species, enough money in everyone’s pockets, happiness for everybody. Oh, there are a million things I could do, and I started to feel that I could.

Tomoko held her chin while I was rattling on.

Just think a cure for any illness, an answer for any question, a solution to any problem. It would be great, fantastic.

Tomoko sat in silence. Her elbow was on the table and with her hand she held her chin and she listened to me with a smile.

I could wish for no accidents ever, no more crime, no violence, nothing that could hurt another person in any which shape or form, I said, and I could feel I was on a roll.

Tomoko, just think, no plane could ever fall out of the sky, no ship could sink, no train or car could crash, and nothing could go wrong. Wouldn’t it be wonderful? I said.

Tomoko took a sip of her coffee and had happiness in her face. I could make more ‘anythings’ and just give them away by the hundreds, thousands, by the millions, said I, and everyone could wish for their own dream.

Tomoko had finished her coffee and said, Can I have another cuppa?

Sorry, I’m out of coffee. That was the last I had, I said.

And what about yourself, Aphra? Isn’t there anything you wish for yourself? she asked.

No. I don’t want anything.

I’ve got all I need.

I don’t wish for anything, I said.

Then I looked at Tomoko. She swallowed and then shut her eyes and a tear ran down her cheek.

End

Preface (In the Shadow of the Sun)

The language of 'In the Shadow of the Sun' is poetic and metaphorical, creating a lyrical and expressive style. In the realm of human emotions, few are as captivating and elusive as love. It weaves its intricate tapestry in the hearts and minds of those who dare to venture into its depths, casting shadows and illuminating paths unknown. It is within this ethereal realm that 'In the Shadow of the Sun' unfolds, revealing a tender exploration of love's complexities, its yearnings, and the profound impact it holds on our lives.

From the tender age of five, when petals plucked from a flower held the power to reveal love's truth, we embark on a journey alongside the narrator. The simple act of counting petals becomes a metaphor for the uncertainties and hopes that reside within every heart. Through evocative prose, we witness the narrator's youthful innocence and the unwavering belief in the power of love's affirmation.

As the years pass, the narrator's understanding of love evolves, guided by encounters with the sun, mirrors, echoes, and the vastness of the ocean. These encounters become catalysts for self-reflection and introspection, awakening a newfound awareness of the complexities of love's presence.

The interplay between light and shadow mirrors the ebb and flow of their connection with a loved one, as they navigate the intricacies of distance, longing, and the yearning for unity.

Through heartfelt dialogue and profound introspection, the narrative delves into the nature of love itself. It explores the intangible essence of love, its boundless nature that transcends borders and defies conventional constraints. The narrator grapples with the challenges of distance, longing to bridge the physical and emotional gaps that separate one from the other.

As the passage of time unfolds, the narrative weaves a web of emotions, capturing the deep ache and profound yearning that arises from a love unfulfilled. Their connection, though constrained by circumstance, remains a beacon of hope, reminding us of the power of love's enduring presence even in the face of adversity.

Throughout the pages of 'In the Shadow of the Sun,' we are invited to contemplate the significance of each breath we take and the profound longing that resides within our hearts.

The narrative challenges us to question our fears, to confront the uncertainties that hold us back from embracing love's transformative power. It reminds us that love, in all its forms and colours, has the ability to shape and define our existence, transcending the boundaries of time and space.

As you embark on this poignant exploration of love's intricacies, may the words on these pages resonate within your own heart. May they serve as a reminder of the power of love to illuminate even the darkest shadows, to inspire us to take the leap, and to embrace the transformative nature of love's embrace.

Heinz G. Ross

In the shadow of the sun

Three petals I picked when I was five.

He loves me; he loves me not; he loves me.

I was so glad to be alive when I was five.

Four petals I picked when I was six.

He loves me; he loves me not. He loves me; he loves me not.

Oh, what a fix when I was six!

At seven, I had worked out that if I picked five petals, he would love me. If I picked 7, 9, or 11, he would love me too.

With six, eight, and twelve petals, I ripped one off before I started counting. I could make sure he always loved me.

The sun shone down, and I looked up and said, Hey sun, you do see everything. You shine in all directions.

That is not so, the sun replied. I cannot see behind you.

That is correct, and neither can I, this said I.

But you shine everywhere at once, I said, That is sheer magic.

That is not so, the sun replied. I cannot shine upon myself.

Oh dear, I am so sorry, so said I, and began to ponder and wonder.

Then I stood, turned, and looked in all directions, and I could see everything except one thing. I could not see myself. I saw the bits of me, the arms, the legs, but never all of me at once.

And then I saw the magic of a mirror that could see everything except itself. I brought it face-to-face with another, and then it saw itself for the first time.

It said, This is not how you see me. My left is left, my right is right; it should be the other way around. This is not me, I see.

Then I stood on the edge of a gorge and called out loud. The echo returned, repeating my words, my proof that I had spoken.

Then I picked a flower with so many petals. I did not count them before I started. I was hopeful that he loved me. It would have worked out, but the last three petals had become four when I discovered another hidden between them.

Then I cried my heart out on a wall. Every sop I made came echoed from the wall until I realised it had no ears, nor had it words of soothing.

I went to the ocean, and the fin of a shark taught me: Move forwards or you will drown; don’t stop; don’t give up hope; or you will perish. I would if I stopped.

So I did, advancing forwards, wherever that was. Mostly, I moved ahead, towards, or away from now.

Forwards I walked into the future, but it had a fence across my path. You cannot enter, said the future, walk in the present. There’s your place.

He loves me; he loves me not; he loves me. That’s nice to know, I heard me say, but if he does, where is he?

I’m here, I heard his thoughts, and I do love you, his thoughts conveyed.

And then we met. His eyes were blue, and mine are green and blue eyes I had never seen. In the shine of the sun, I saw them sparkle, and he saw mine shine.

One summer we played, and another. We laughed, and loved, and bothered. Somehow, the sun had moved and cast a shadow. Two silhouettes stood in the shade on the grass, and we couldn’t tell each other apart. So similar in many ways that the sun rose up for another day.

One day the sun rose, and late in the afternoon it started to lower, and then it would no longer move. It stopped setting and stayed fixed to throw a long shadow. From that low, it could not reflect from their eyes.

I love you, he did say.

And I do you, my heart responded. Why are we apart?

Love is free, he said to me. Love has no bounds, no borders.

Love is..., and then he said what love is: Love.

So if you love me, why don’t you? I said, but his thoughts cut me short. The ‘if’ is in the way, he said.

But the flower said you love me, I said.

I do, said he to me.

Why don’t you come then? this I said.

I am with you, but mostly in my thoughts, said he.

How can you love me from afar? said I.

I do, said he, your arrow pierced me.

Each morning I awake with you by my side in thoughts.

And so do I, said I.

Throughout the day, I am with you, I knew.

So what’s the answer? I did say

Love is an answer in itself, said he.

What does that mean? asked I.

Love is, he said to me.

Another month went by. Another month went past. Each month had four weeks, and sometimes it had more. Each week had seven days; sometimes they seemed longer. Each day had 24 hours, some of which they slept. And each day of every week of every month, he thought of her. And so did she of him.

This is a sin, he said to me.

But if you love me, could you not...

Love is, he said again

Do you not miss me?" this I asked.

I do more than you know, said he.

And I miss you, said I.

He cried.

Another month and more went by, each aching for the other and filling time with bother.

But if you love me, could you not...

I do, said he. You know I do.

How many breaths of air have you inhaled? he asked.

How would I know? I never counted, said I.

How many breaths will you have left? he asked.

I do not know the answer, said I.

How many breaths are due to you? he said.

What sort of question is this? Is there a measure? I replied.

He did not answer but asked again, Do you not take the air to fill your lungs? Do you not fill its hunger?

I do, said I.

Is there not a longing in your heart for love? he asked.

There is, I said.

Why don’t you let it in? he said.

I would, but... he did not let me answer.

And there is your answer, said he.

Which of the breaths you took have you ever refused? Which breaths did you take by choice? Which breaths did you ever question before inhaling? said he in asking.

Possibly none, and all, and none, to answer all three, I said to him. My lung could not live without it, said I as a reply.

And your heart can? said he, his answer as a question.

Another month with many days and many hours went from now to the past.

What do we do? he asked.

Perhaps we shall get over it, I try. Time shall pass by.

Love is life. Life unlived is unthinkable. Love unloved is incomprehensible, he said to me.

Oh, I do love you from afar, I said.

And so do I, said he.

And months went by, and each one cried, and none knew how to solve it. So close they lived yet as far apart as day and night. By chance, they would most likely never meet.

And it is I; I cry, said I.

Me too, for you, he said to me.

How can it be that you have not found another? they both asked of each other. No need to answer; they both knew because of ‘love’.

Another minute grew to an hour, to become a day that grew to a week, which swelled to another month, which was surpassed by another with a different name.

Is it not such a waste? said I.

It is reason to cry, he said to me.

I did, said I.

And so did I, said he to me.

He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me.

How many petals will you pick before you can accept their answer? he said to me.

As many as I need to know, to be certain, said she.

I will breathe you; I will breathe you not; I will breathe you,

said he, and laughed at me.

I'll love you when I’m certain, I said.

You love me, he said.

I do, said I. I do love you.

So why don’t you do what love needs you doing, he said to me.

I am afraid, said I.

Of me or of love? he questioned.

Both, I think, said I.

I am afraid to see you, said I, afraid you will draw me close.

I will, and that you know, said he.

I know, and I would come to you, said I.

Are you afraid that if you do, you shall deny you to the one that colours your dream? he said to me.

How did you know? I asked.

He cried.

Are you not looking? You’re free to do it, said I.

I know. Love won’t allow me, this he said.

I want my love in the colour green, said I.

Love is in every colour, said he.

I don’t want every colour. I want green, said I.

Does it matter which colour love is? he said to me.

I said, It does to me.

If that’s a must, then wear coloured lenses so that it shows to you in green,